Do you have someone on the Side??
- Thread starter omnipadme
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Princess4real
Well-Known Member
Who me?
Armyqt
New Member
omnipadme
Well-Known Member
My side dish is a complete winer and diner who knows that I have a man. He's sweet and great company, and respects my boundaries. He made a comment that my man hasn't put a ring on my finger yet, so it's no reason why I shouldn't feel free to spend time with him. I'm kinda starting to see the light in that statement...
cocoberry10
Well-Known Member
If I were in a relationship, I would not like the idea of my man having something "on the side," nor would I. However, I know that "until you are married, you are single," so I know that if I am not married to someone, as much as I want to, he is not my husband. However, I do not tolerate cheating if we have agreed to be exclusive, so I would dump him.
However, if I were not in a relationship, I feel completely free to date whomever I want, and no one can tell me differently!
omnipadme
Well-Known Member
there's nothing physical going on between me and...lets call him Mr. Biggs, but there has been activity in the past when we were both single (went to college together). All that ended when I told him that I wanted to be in a relationship w/my beau. My beau is amazing in almost every aspect, but what he lacks, Mr. Biggs has (and vice versa). I still wanted to remain friends with Mr. Biggs because he was great company, total gentlemen, and is nice to talk to (no pressure for marriage and kids like my beau). Whenever I go over to his place, we always just watch tv/movies together, and I might sleep over in the guest room.
i like the idea of diversifying my portfolio. why should i be so tied down at 23?
i like the idea of diversifying my portfolio. why should i be so tied down at 23?
Armyqt
New Member
Now, why ya got to go excluding us married folks? We need extras more than anybody...Lawd knows we do...
(for real, though)..I'm with DL, who has the time....
Mens can be oh-so-much work...
p31woman
Well-Known Member
there's nothing physical going on between me and...lets call him Mr. Biggs, but there has been activity in the past when we were both single (went to college together). All that ended when I told him that I wanted to be in a relationship w/my beau. My beau is amazing in almost every aspect, but what he lacks, Mr. Biggs has (and vice versa). I still wanted to remain friends with Mr. Biggs because he was great company, total gentlemen, and is nice to talk to (no pressure for marriage and kids like my beau). Whenever I go over to his place, we always just watch tv/movies together, and I might sleep over in the guest room.
i like the idea of diversifying my portfolio. why should i be so tied down at 23?
Why be in a relationship then?
Would you be upset if you found out your SO had a female on the side?
I agree with foxxymami and cocoberry10, if I'm in a relationship, its just us. period.
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What's wrong with sleeping with more than one man if you're not married?
HEY ARMY!!!
Girl, I gotta give you a spanking for that comment!!
!!!!!Are you serious??!! You lil skank!!
(j/k... I think!! 
)I am with you on this one.
I would not be in a commited relationship with someone if I wanted to date multiple men.
I don't think there is anything wrong with it as long as you are open and honest about what your expectations are with the ALL parties involved.
LunadeMiel
Well-Known Member
I completely aggree with the above. I'd be damn if found out my man had a side piece.
audacious1
New Member
I don't mean to laugh but you went hard on this subject. But I totally agree with you! I don't have anything on the side because to me its immoral (under the guise of committed relationship, otherwise, I'm all for it) and I wouldn't want it to happen to me.
sunshinebeautiful
Well-Known Member
But I totally agree with you! I don't have anything on the side because to me its immoral (under the guise of committed relationship, otherwise, I'm all for it) and I wouldn't want it to happen to me.
Yeah. Leave some men for the rest of us.
You know there's a shortage going around.
harrison
New Member
Now, why ya got to go excluding us married folks? We need extras more than anybody...Lawd knows we do...
*looks both ways and steps out*locabouthair
Well-Known Member
But I totally agree with you! I don't have anything on the side because to me its immoral (under the guise of committed relationship, otherwise, I'm all for it) and I wouldn't want it to happen to me.
I agree i couldnt do it. but to each their own.
glamazon386
Well-Known Member
Of course... Anything else would be less than civilized.
omnipadme
Well-Known Member
I'm not gonna lie, i think i have a problem with commitment. I feel like this is the first "serious" relationship I've been in, so I guess i'm a little bit fearful of uncharted territory. I love my man, we're best friends, but sometimes he's so controlling and wants way more than I want at this time in my life. That's why it's nice to have the other guy on the side who's not so serious to spend time with, who i've already decided I couldn't be in a relationship with. The biggest problem with me and my man is our 10 yr age difference- he's been there, he's done that, but i'm still learning.
Thank you all for your harshness! My friends might tell me that everything is all gravy, so its good to have a 3rd party as voice of reason to assist me with working out the kinks
Thank you all for your harshness! My friends might tell me that everything is all gravy, so its good to have a 3rd party as voice of reason to assist me with working out the kinks
Armyqt
New Member
HEY ARMY!!!
Girl, I gotta give you a spanking for that comment!!
Are you serious??!! You lil skank!!
haha
I was feeling a little mischievious yesterday so I decided to do a lil trolling. It seems nobody bit because this thread is still in tact. 
J/K Sometimes it's kinda fun to see the ladies get wrapped around the axle. Sorry ya'll. I still love you guys 
MrsQueeny
Well-Known Member
I did this once when I was young. My SO and I were in a long distance relationship and the other person was just someone I could hang with. There was nothing physical or anything. Now that I am older, and if I ever became single again, I would just not be in a relationship and just date people instead of doing what I did before. I know my SO then would not have been happy if he found out and if the shoe was on the other foot, I wouldn't have been either. Q
scorpian
New Member
I may get stoned for this but IMO women and men define relationship differently. A man can have a girlfriend and still keep his options open because she's not his wife..doesn't matter if ya'll live together been together for years or whatever. When given an opportunity I've heard many a man say "well I'm not married so....." Exclusive to SOME men is only an option once they get married and even then if an opportunity presents itself 
they'll act now and worry about being sorry later.
As women when we say that's my man I'm his girlfriend we think that because we've agreed to be monogamous and committed that he's gonna do the same and when we find out that he hasn't held up his end of the deal we are heartbroken and he's confused 'cause you are not his wife so he thinks you are supposed to just get over it.
I believe that lots of men keep women on the side. That's why when ya'll break up you find out that he didn't waste any time he's already got with so and so and she's big and pregnant or he up and marries some girl right after you break up and you wonder where she came from and when he met her.
erplexed
Women have sat back forever and let men have all of the fun so why shouldn't an unmarried women keep her options open?
they'll act now and worry about being sorry later. As women when we say that's my man I'm his girlfriend we think that because we've agreed to be monogamous and committed that he's gonna do the same and when we find out that he hasn't held up his end of the deal we are heartbroken and he's confused 'cause you are not his wife so he thinks you are supposed to just get over it.
I believe that lots of men keep women on the side. That's why when ya'll break up you find out that he didn't waste any time he's already got with so and so and she's big and pregnant or he up and marries some girl right after you break up and you wonder where she came from and when he met her.
erplexed Women have sat back forever and let men have all of the fun so why shouldn't an unmarried women keep her options open?
WhipEffectz1
Well-Known Member
I may get stoned for this but IMO women and men define relationship differently. A man can have a girlfriend and still keep his options open because she's not his wife..doesn't matter if ya'll live together been together for years or whatever. When given an opportunity I've heard many a man say "well I'm not married so....." Exclusive to SOME men is only an option once they get married and even then if an opportunity presents itself
As women when we say that's my man I'm his girlfriend we think that because we've agreed to be monogamous and committed that he's gonna do the same and when we find out that he hasn't held up his end of the deal we are heartbroken and he's confused 'cause you are not his wife so he thinks you are supposed to just get over it.
I believe that lots of men keep women on the side. That's why when ya'll break up you find out that he didn't waste any time he's already got with so and so and she's big and pregnant or he up and marries some girl right after you break up and you wonder where she came from and when he met her.
Women have sat back forever and let men have all of the fun so why shouldn't an unmarried women keep her options open?
Holla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't live my life like a married person until I'm fully married with an official ring (or ring holder
) and the marriage papers signed so that just in case he kicks the bucket I get the insurance and not bragging rights/memories of how good he was to me. I have myriad friend guys so its only normal for me to have a standby guy in times of crisis that understands my pending situation and to take me out with NSA. Now I've never proposed to be an angel (and I'm not about to change to let yall know what angel/good girl I am only to reveal a couple months down the road that your man who you was so good to you went astray!!!
"What should you do???") But I think if more women had these type of what I call Standby men who are platonic, at least until/if your situation ends, then there would be less women chasing after some of these men who don't want to be caught or led to water. With that said, its nice to have a standby guy because if you ever break up with your friend then you're tossed back into the processing of enjoying yourself until the next best thing comes along. However, it seems that the longer I be in this current relationship, the more my standbys are dropping off the market and thats fine with me because the thing is that I'm friends with most of them and that will never change.
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gymfreak336
New Member
Holla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't live my life like a married person until I'm fully married with an official ring (or ring holder
Now I've never proposed to be an angel (and I'm not about to change to let yall know what angel/good girl I am only to reveal a couple months down the road that your man who you was so good to you went astray!!!
However, it seems that the longer I be in this current relationship, the more my standbys are dropping off the market and thats fine with me because the thing is that I'm friends with most of them and that will never change.
Thanks for posting. I needed this today.
gymfreak336
New Member
scorpian
New Member
Holla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't live my life like a married person until I'm fully married with an official ring (or ring holder
Now I've never proposed to be an angel (and I'm not about to change to let yall know what angel/good girl I am only to reveal a couple months down the road that your man who you was so good to you went astray!!!
However, it seems that the longer I be in this current relationship, the more my standbys are dropping off the market and thats fine with me because the thing is that I'm friends with most of them and that will never change.
You and me are here >< Whips :notworthy
gone_fishing
New Member
Nope.........
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