Black People have the Worst Kind of Hair...

Much props to you, shame on her. As if lil black and brown girls don't have enough to contend with...you should always at least feel comfortable in the homes of your family. I understand your restraint out of respect to your SO and the fact that she is older, but it would've been so difficult for me! She sounds like she was thirsty for a big tall glass of Slapaho flavored Kool-Aid :nono:


:lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen:
 
20 and 17.

I was about to ask how old was your eldest. Does he have a girlfriend?:look: I'm 20 as well:lick::lick::look:

But back OT:

This woman is despicable to have said that in front such a young child. And people say (in our most recent dark/light threads) colorism doesn't affect people as much as it use to :rolleyes:. I often wonder just how people can hate themselves so much :nono:
 
As Chris Rock once said "Who ever you don't like will end up in your family, if you don't like gay people, you gonna have a gay son/daughter, you don't black people...guess what? your son/daughter gonna bring home a black wife/husband"

BTW: Your SO is F-I-N-E!!!! Damn, I swore after my last pr bf I wouldn't date a latin man again (bc of how latin people can be towards darskinned blacks) but damn your SO is making me re-open the possibilities....lol
 
:wallbash::wallbash::wallbash:

I'm steaming for you, too.

Your SO's mother is simply ignorant. I believe the Dominican nation, and most Caribbean nations in general, have issues with blackness. There are plenty of blacks in the DR and its part of their identity, so you can just pity her self-hatred.

I don't mean to mess up your engagement, but if I were you I would stay away from that man and his dumb family. But that's only me, because I hold grudges. Bless that poor little girl who has to deal with hatred from her own family. It really breaks my heart.

Plus, I applaud you for not cursing the hell out of her, but may be you should speak your mind.
 
It's been said before, but I'm going to say it again: Some people are just too ignorant for words :nono:. They are so brainwashed by what they hear other racists say about people and the images that they see on the television that they can't even decide for themselves what is beautiful and what is not. The funny thing is that she finds black people attractive enough to date but not attractive enough to marry and breed with. I know she's your mother-in-law and everything, but you aren't marrying HER. Your only obligation is to her son, and my philosophy is that if a person is nothing but negative and disrespectful to me, then they don't have any place in my life. Life is far too short to waste time being unhappy because someone else doesn't think that your good enough. As long as you and your man think you're good enough, then that's all that matters :yep:.
 
I'm sorry about this. As the OP and many others are aware, Dominicans (and many other Latinos) have the same colorism and hair issues that exist in the Black community.

Specifically Dominicans, b/c many of them are considered the more "Black" Latinos than other Latino groups (i.e. Puerto Ricans and South Americans). Although this isn't true (since there are Blacks in all Latin American countries), the stigma has caused some (many) Dominicans to carry this hatred. Not all behave this way, but it's an unfortunate reality that some (just like some Blacks) have these issues!

OP, what will you do when you have children?
 
Gurl, I don't know how you stayed calm. I'm glad you did but I know I would have clicked! My SO couldn't have said enough to get my point across.

The dominicans I've seen looked like us and so did their hair. :rolleyes:
 
Im angry just reading this but I do realize your future MIL isn't the only one who thinks like that...You handled yourself well OP, Im impressed and surprised lol; but she was extremely rude, nasty & all out disrespectful and I would have had to check her even if that was my SO's mama because she shouldn't feel that she can always treat you any way and talk to you any way. I wouldn't curse her out out of respect for my SO but still I would've had to speak my mind that day. That's too much.

[LOL Im laughing now because I know if it were me in your shoes and I went to my mama and told her that story, the first thing out her mouth would be " What? :nono: And what did you say?" :lol: ]
 
wtf?! I'm trulely DISGUSTED by what I just read! how could you say such horrific things to a child?! i mean really...i hope that child's mother tears that mentally enslaved rotten brain troll a new one! LadyKaypnyc, i don't see how you did it..if that was me she would have gotten her face kicked in..that btch would not have been able to spew that type of garbage ever again!

poor lil' mama..that will probably stick with her for the rest of her life.
 
I would have been arrested for a very, very, very long time :look:.................. a very very long time. My blood boils just hearing that.
 
I suggest you cut your MIL out of your life...she's nothing but poison!

Please affirm to the little girl that she is beautiful...let her mother know what happened.

Some Dominicans are serious victims of colorism... :perplexed
 
You held it down,your man had your back...that speaks volumes:yep:

Don't let that man get away cause of his bitter a$$ mammy...


and those two dudes in that siggy are:lick:,as is your so:yep:
 
dang, i thought my grandma was bad with her color issues... this takes the cake... :look:

i'm so sorry you had to go thru that babe. :bighug: the woman clearly has very deep-seated issues...
 
I’m so sorry for your situation Op. This is why I raise my black boys to be just a bit OVER confident. Can’t nobody tell them they are not the most handsome, the smartest, the sweetest things on earth.
Toxic family members don’t get the privilege of hanging out with my kids…
 
she is so sad, i thought domincians and mexicans like black people... he racis a@@ I would not be around her, makes no sense for you take it and your finance should understand, you aint marrying her anyway F her, she aint nothing but negative energy, I dont think her problem is with black people, but herself, she dont like herself:nono:
 
Wow! I just finished reading this entire thread and I am so sorry this happpened. I am sorry for you LadyKapypnyc, but also to that poor 4 year old girl. If exposed to this toxic woman, she will grow up with complexes about her hair and looks, and that is unacceptable...

I'm worried about the future of your relationship with your now fiancee (congrats by the way). This woman's dislike of you just because of the shade of your skin or the texture of your hair will not go away and will translate to her treatment of your children. My fear is that her poison will creat problems in your relationship. In this particular situation, you showed restraint and fortitude, but you will not always be so calm, and things might escalte and get ugly. So good luck to you...

On another note, the Domincan mentality is an unfortunate one. There is a saying that every Domincan has "black behind the ears", no matter how white they are. Basically, it translates to every Domincan person has black blood in them or is related to someone who is black. Ironically, there is a mentality that the lighter skinned you are, the better you are. Period. I know not everyone feels that way, but many people do. This goes back to the War of Independence and a whole lot of historic stuff, but unfortunately, they've never managed to move on from that. The sad thing is that the majority of the Domincan population is NOT white, yet they won't accept their reality...

So again, I'm so sorry this happened to you and I do wish you and your fiancee the best. Good luck with this and I hope that child won't be scarred for life from her aunt's ignorance.

:bighug:
 
On another note, the Domincan mentality is an unfortunate one. There is a saying that every Domincan has "black behind the ears", no matter how white they are. Basically, it translates to every Domincan person has black blood in them or is related to someone who is black. Ironically, there is a mentality that the lighter skinned you are, the better you are. Period. I know not everyone feels that way, but many people do. This goes back to the War of Independence and a whole lot of historic stuff, but unfortunately, they've never managed to move on from that. The sad thing is that the majority of the Domincan population is NOT white, yet they won't accept their reality...

So again, I'm so sorry this happened to you and I do wish you and your fiancee the best. Good luck with this and I hope that child won't be scarred for life from her aunt's ignorance.

:bighug:

Very very true...I live in NYC and grew up here. There's a huge Dominican population and a lot of them will say things like "I'm not Black, I'm Dominican" when they're darker than me and use the same relaxer I do, LOL.

To the OP, it's very unfortunate that this woman is so racist and so self-hating. However, I wouldn't leave your fiance, just b/c of her, esp. since he realizes how messed up she is in the head.
 
She already is, her Boyfriend of 7 years left her after she refused to have a baby with him b/c of his naps, his little brother's father left her b/c of the "That's not my baby....he's too dark" comment she made to the nurse when he was born...

It's crazy b/c I knew of all these things beforehand, but since I never witnessed it I thought they were exaggerating....

The fact that he moved out at 16 b/c he didn't want to be around his own mother should have told me something, but I didn't know she could be this :nuts:


R U SERIOUS!!!!!!!!! her own baby???? Maybe everybody shouldn't leave her I know that makes you mad but like someone said she is SUFFERING...i don't think she is really racist...a true racist would kill theirselves before laying down with someone they were racist against I think everyone should band together, take the high road, and force her into some counseling and just let whatever her demons are saying (b/c i'm sure that's not her) roll right off your back...i know it's easier said than done but just say it's the demons talking!!! Counseling would prolly do some good!!
 
THIS IS SO SAD TO READ....MY HEART IS BREAKING... I think that you handled yourself very well...

I just can't believe she said all that with a 4 year old child present!!....:nono: what a crazy lady!!

kiki82
 
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OMG, I can't believe this happened. I feel sorry for you, your fiance', and your niece; I feel even worse for your soon to be mother in law:nono:. It is so sad that she thinks the way she does. She will probably never change her opinions, regardless to what anybody tells her.

You handled yourself appropriately with her. You all will be in my prayers.
 
Very very true...I live in NYC and grew up here. There's a huge Dominican population and a lot of them will say things like "I'm not Black, I'm Dominican" when they're darker than me and use the same relaxer I do, LOL.

To the OP, it's very unfortunate that this woman is so racist and so self-hating. However, I wouldn't leave your fiance, just b/c of her, esp. since he realizes how messed up she is in the head.

Exactly. DOMINICANS ARE AFRICAN. Case closed. They can read a history book to figure it out. It's not that hard. Africans were dumped in many places in the Americas -- including our country, the Carribbean, Latin and South America. They may have been mixed up more than the American slave, and they have a diff. culture, but they are African too. And honestly, that is why they are so adamant about it. It is an extreme case of self hate. And it's sad. It's not just Domicans though, most tinted people have these issues. Vestiges of colonialism and slavery ...
 
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