At your current age, do you feel like all good men are taken?

At 33, yes I do - especially since I prefer men who are at least 10 years older. That goes for both black and non-black men.

I'm kind of in a catch-22: I don't want to support a man financially, but I'm not established career wise at this point in my life (disability, working part-time) to demand something better, like a higher wage earner.
 
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Hmmm, sometimes I think they're not and then there are days that I think they are taken or just that good men are just hard to find. Do they make them anymore :lol: :look:?!?

I'm 40 with no prospects btw. I've tried the on-line thing but the quality of men are not that great at all. It was a turn off. :nono: Some days I'm hopeful and somedays I'm just not. :ohwell:
 
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No - to an extent though. I'm 24 and people around this age (where I am, anyway) haven't reached the stage where they are settling down. So whilst a lot of the guys in my immediate environment are not actually single, I don't assume all the good ones are gone. I think it's more a matter of being where they are and branching out of my pool.
 
I just looked at the stats for Virginia. It seems marriage starts to decline a little after age 30 (for men), taking a noticeable dip at 39 and dropping pretty steadily after that.

So, it would seem that most men in my age group who are the marrying sort (the only sort that matters) are already married, or quite likely engaged or in a serious relationship.

All the good guys? No. Most? Statistically, highly likely.
 
No because last year I was blessed to be found by one. I never really thought all good men were taken prior to that. If you think all the good men are taken then of course you will never be found by one. You think negative like that and it takes up existence in your heart and mind.
 
Interesting observation...........the 20 something year olds and the 30 something year olds have very different responses. While I do feel quality definitely declines with age, I don't think it's entirely impossible to find a good man. Just make sure when you do find him, you hold on and appreciate him. So many women have good men but don't know it or don't appreciate them!
 
Honestly, I'm like where are all the good men, PERIOD?

The majority of guys I know who are taken I would not consider "good". Maybe cool as people, but as mates? :nono:
 
Nope, actually men in my age range are looking for someone to get serious with. I'm interested in men in their 30's and since I have a youthful appearance that's a plus.
 
Just turned 30 and there are plenty of good enough. I meet, talk to and get to know lots of good enough. I guess it depends on what you're looking for and for me I am looking for friendships/networking, so its no pressure for me strike up a conversation where ever with whoever.

Besides, I am not subscribing to all those things that turn black men into a purple unicorn because he's employed, responsible and a productive citizen. Why should he get credit for doing what he's supposed to do? No other race accepts such abject mediocrity. I believe because I don't subscribe to this sky is falling/no eligible black men thinking, I find and enjoy the company of lots of black men who will make great husbands and fathers one day or today. I am no 10 by a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo *inhale*ooooooooooooooooong shot, but I guess I am exposed more to them given my career is in a male dominated industry. I also don't have 'desperate for husband and kids' in size 200 Times New Roman font above my head and I grew up with all male cousins, so I share their interests and attend events where they are: gaming, sports, cars etc.

I know beautiful women with great men and some who say they cant find one and I know some Gigapet looking *****s who capture half way decent looking, smart, responsible black men and some looking like Shirley Hemphill in the corner watching everyone elses drinks.

*shrug* I dont know. I can tell you that a few of my coworkers/male friends...good men get looked over because they're under 6'4 or he makes 30K a year teaching science or he's at home with his parents because he's saving for a house or he drives a hatchback and apparently..that isn't hott in the streets. I hear all sorts of horror stories.

Also, Patrice Oneal said it best..."there is no such thing as a "single" man". He may dislodge his attachments for you, but men in general run a corporation and will always have employees performing various duties for them. They're recruiters...its what they do, even now more than ever.

On a side note: Those I want to be a bachelor forever types are the absolute worse, collecting women, selling dreams, so they can get all the milk without buying the cow. Bastards.

Its all interesting.
 
No. I'm 27 and they're all over the place but that may be due to the types of companies around where I live. I'm married but still keep my eyes open.
 
For what I would consider a "good" man, yeah I'd have to say at this age range the pickings are slim, especially once you factor in chemistry, am keeping an open mind though and honestly am just learning to have fun and live my life.
 
They are, but that's okay... I'm in school and worse comes to worse, I'll take a dude that's 10 years older or younger...
 
No, I don't think they're all taken. I keep my pool pretty wide. I'll date almost anyone between 35-47 that seems like a nice guy. So there's always options.

HOWEVER, I'm finding that good, serious, single men are not OUT THERE like players and hustlers always on the stroll. The good ones are at focused on caring for their families (be it aging parents, co-parenting, etc), working, trying to keep their **** tight. That's what they do. I'm a good woman and that's what *I* do. So it's safe to make that leap. lol

Maybe one day, I'll get lucky when a good one decides to come up for air and take a look around.
 
I believe they are heavily available but I just don't know where they are. I see my brother's friends or my sister's friends and I'm like "what do you do at night?". I asked a friend of mine who lives in DC where I would find some because he's from here and still visits often. It was in jest but I was being serious. Turned out he didn't even know. Wth.

Those who are in their early 20s kismettt cutiebe2 Theo melisandre Okay qchelle
How's dating going? Sometimes I feel like holding off on it completely until I get my degree and a job. This going out ish so I can be found is starting to be for the birds. It can get mad expensive.
 
I did think they were all taken actually up until that last few months. Maybe all the good ones are getting divorced.
 
*SkolarStar* said:
Those who are in their early 20s kismettt
How's dating going? Sometimes I feel like holding off on it completely until I get my degree and a job. This going out ish so I can be found is starting to be for the birds. It can get mad expensive.
Click to expand...

when i moved to a new area, i used okcupid. i've met one decent person off of there. but since i didn't date much prior to my last serious relationship, it was very helpful as far as figuring out what i want/expect in dating. i met a few guys through work/friends (ehhh, some were okay but mostly not what i was looking for). i don't really go out that much anymore, & i've been dating the same guy for about 8 months now so i don't have to. i'm moving next week, so my dating life will probably be nonexistent while i get settled/meet people. but i'm fine with that. i don't really go out to meet men. i go out to spend time with my friends/meet new people. i like being single actually b/c i'm super picky :lol:
 
*SkolarStar*

Are you in college? You don't meet men on campus? At group meetings/events/parties? I think it's easier to meet guys while you're in school. It's such a social environment. You don't have to be found at the club, you can be found.... Anywhere.

I usually run into guys via my extended social network... So a friend of a friend... in some type of way. I go out a lot tho. You're right... It can be expensive. But it shouldn't be *too* expensive. What types of places are you trying to go to?
 
Nope..... Depending on the criteria of what "good" means. I just feel most/all are the same with varying levels of the same traits. You either tolerate it on the level you can digest or do without.
 
Theo said:
*SkolarStar*

Are you in college? You don't meet men on campus? At group meetings/events/parties? I think it's easier to meet guys while you're in school. It's such a social environment. You don't have to be found at the club, you can be found.... Anywhere.

I usually run into guys via my extended social network... So a friend of a friend... in some type of way. I go out a lot tho. You're right... It can be expensive. But it shouldn't be *too* expensive. What types of places are you trying to go to?
Click to expand...

Theo I'm in college and the the guys here 'aint on sh*t'. And since I go to a PWI the yt girls made them feel like hot commodities. I don't have the energy to deal with that. Because of this I've never been one to date in my vicinity, either he'll live a city away or he'll be older (25 and up). But I am meeting a lot of people through friends, but they're still not bf material not even dateable some of them.

I can barely count on one hand the places I can go that I would find fun if I'm alone (I'm a product of the "only single one left", all of my friends have bf's) so going out alone is my only option most of the time. And it usually includes drinks and it's usually expensive because I usually like older guys. *face*palm*

But I'm about to call it quits on all of this due to the aforementioned reasons and some.
 
Honestly, I think I'm doing something wrong. Making poor choices. I blame myself. I need to get more involved with life and follow my passions. Conquer my fears, stop wasting time on emotionally unavailable cyber men and take some risks.
 
ElegantPearl17 said:
Ummm yes, like one poster stated in another thread. If you meet an eligible man, always assume he's taken until told otherwise. I'm in my early 30's.
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I need to add this to my "Rules for Life" list for DD. This would save so many people alot of heartache.
 
FemmeFatale said:
And by good men I mean the men with good character that are educated and attractive with little to no baggage.
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I think in no psychos be winning because they are all with them

Sent from my Mom's iPad using LHCF
 
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