Assumptions Made Because You're Natural

[Black Hoya Chick]

- that i am all about black power (I am NOT a new black panther lol)
- that i think i am better than girls with relaxers
- that i must be mixed with something (my hair curls...big whoop)

 

[Almaz]

you know the girl at work told me the exact same thing about 2 weeks ago. I love this girl she is my work child. She is so nice. She was saying since the 2 years she has been natural men do approach her differently she said when she was a member of the Weave Nation men approached her too but on a differently level yeah she gets the Ungawa Black Power can I get some weed off of you. Type nonsense. But also people instead of sayin Yo YO mama let me holla at you. They are like Hello Ma'am how are you can I speak to you for a moment.

My response was I guess because they see you Natural in all your glory I guess guys think that you are more interested about what goes IN your head than what is on top of it. Thats probably what they think but you do care about what goes on top of your head also. That is why you went natural in the first place

Just a thought

A lot of people who see me with my natural hair think I'm west African. Which is fine by me.

I've had a few guys come on to me outright by asking me if I smoke weed. I've heard a lot of come-ons but that was a new one. erplexed

I have to admit though (and I saw this comment in another thread) that people (especially black men) tend to come correct and treat me with respect when my hair is natural.

 

[Lucie]

• That I hate women that are relaxed
• That I always had short, broken, relaxed hair.
• I am pro-Black and hate white people. I was invited to a pro-Black rally but was uninvited when I asked to bring my white DH.
• It's a fad and that I will get back to my senses and relax very soon

 

[blaqueskimo]

That I don't like or have an appreciation of relaxed hair styles anymore. I like some of everything! When the mood fits I'll rock any type of straight,curly style wig or weave that catches my fancy........I'm just not going to perm my hair.

 

[eternalsotsm]

That i'm gay...erplexed or pro black. But Truthfully:

It's been pretty decent. I live in Florence, South Carolina and i've actually had positive things said to me about it. Surprised the heck outta me.

 

[MA2010]

I love this thread.

 

[My Friend]

people assume a ton of stuff about me....but most of it is true lol.

yes i love poetry and love performing
they assume im deep (i'd like to think i am)
they call me jill scot and assume i love badu and lauryn hill. (i do, and corrine bailey rae is always on repeat)
they assume i play the guitar (i dont play but i own one and want to take lessons)
one guy was afraid to tell me he married a white woman (dude i dont care).

these things dont bother me much, you know why? because they assumed all this when i was relaxed. to me its all in the vibe you give off. ive had people calling me deep since i can remember. ive always loved jill scott and the rest. i think jill is beautiful.

but sometimes when they do get on my nerves i pump my fists in the air and yell "the revolution will not be televised". lmao. they know im crazy.

You wrong for that!!!!

 

[PeaceFlow]

Some people assume my White Husband doesn't like my natural hair.
They ask, "Umm what did Mike say when you decided to umm do THIS to your hair?"

I still get that with my ex and now my SO.

Its like "let me straighten or put extensions in your hair, your man will be all over you"

 

[dymondgurl]

"Girl I wish I could go natural. What had happened and the reason I can't is blah, blah, blah, blah........"...............This is usually an unprovoked conversation; it just comes out of nowhere and I am usually standing there going, "ummm, o.k???"

That I eat tofu and braid my armpit hair
I am trying to recruit everyone into going natural. Unless someone expresses interest, I don't say a word about natural hair to anyone.

People find the need to explain themselves to me also, unnecessarily! I'm not recruiting for membership! I find this with being in a sorority too. For some reason, people find it necessary to explain to me why they never pledged! Who cares?

I will tell folks quick that I am not on a natural nazi crusade to rid the world of relaxers. If you want relaxed hair...DO YOU!

 

[glamazon386]

I still get that with my ex and now my SO.

Its like "let me straighten or put extensions in your hair, your man will be all over you"

Psh and I'd tell them he already is No relaxer needed... People are so rude.

 

[melissa-bee]

This thread is funny. Being a natural teenager i got none of these comments. I wonder if it will change as a natural adult once i finish my transition.

 

[Aviah]

That I'm very Afrocentric...
However I do write poetry, am "deep", like neo-soul/jazz.

Sucks that sometimes I do fit the stereotype lol

 

[Lynnerie]

People assume that because I'm natural...
1. I shouldn't straighten my hair.
2. That I should get locs.
3. I'm afrocentric
4. Call me Erykah, Jill, And India
5. I'm political

 

[melodies815]

This is great! I have had people assume....

(1) That I am afrocentric. Truth: I'm black and I like it....and that's about as far as that goes.
(2) That I like to burn incense at home. ???? Still don't get this one.
(3) That I am only wearing my hair like this until I loc it. Truth: I have not mentioned growing locs to anyone, so I 'm not sure why this assumption is made.
(4) That my husband is only "tolerating" my hair. Truth: He actually loves me AND the hair on my head.
(5) That I am making a statement. Truth: NOT! It's just my hair.
(6) That my twists are not my hair: Truth: my twists are my hair.
(7) That I can only use Creme of Nature Shampoo. That's the funniest one to me...

cj

 

[lolascurls]

I'm currently transitioning.
I started texlaxing my hair a year ago so my roota and -now- most of my hair has a thick, wavy pattern to it. I used to just bun my hair and go to work or do large cornrows down the sides and go into work after moisturizing and sealing in the morning.
Co-workers (non-black) would say @wow, you hair looks so soft and is so easy to manage!" If they only knew it took months to find out how to do that (satin scarf and Wave Nouveau on edges!)
One co-worker actually wished out loud she could have hair like mine! I was taken aback....she's white!
I'm in the UK, so most people don't know about relaxers or weaves (just braids and cornrows and straighteners!) So when I did NOT straighten my hair, I did my hair myself and I rarely relaxed (12 weeks + usually), they didn't get how my hair seemed so managable and soft without lots of manipulation!

My white room-mate then (we call ourselves surrogate twins) actually started pre-pooing and using Hair mayonnaise and other good haircare practices when she saw how healthy it made my hair! Healthy hair is manageable hair: relaxed or natural!

I haven't gotten many negative comments outside my family (my dad thinks thick hair is bad, straight hair is good. Too bad....it's my hair so thick is GREAT!)

 

[lp318lp]

I agree with a lot of what others experience. People assume that I:

1) am a strong-willed, courageous, yet angry, BLACK woman!
2) am from Africa (No specific country, but the ENTIRE continent)!
3) smell bad perplexed)
4) am a "free-spirited" woman of nature
5) don't believe in Jesus, rather the Universe, Mother Earth, or weed! (LOL)
6) want to give the world the middle finger

Just to name a few...

 

[Mdmommy99]

When I had locs, I had a lot of white people who didn't understand that locs were not the same thing as braid with extensions and assume that my hair was fake. When I was trying on wedding gowns the store owner asked "so when it grows do you just weave new hair in?" Then tried to swear me down that my hair wasn't real because she had a friend that had the "same thing"

Needless to say, I purchased my gown elsewhere.

 

[dymondgurl]

I agree with a lot of what others experience. People assume that I:

1) am a strong-willed, courageous, yet angry, BLACK woman!
2) am from Africa (No specific country, but the ENTIRE continent)!
3) smell bad perplexed)
4) am a "free-spirited" woman of nature
5) don't believe in Jesus, rather the Universe, Mother Earth, or weed! (LOL)
6) want to give the world the middle finger

I know my mother was a bit "concerned" in the beginning of my natural hair journey

 

[Magus484]

People assume that:

I am into art/an artist
I am studying art in grad school (actually, I'm an MBA)

I do like art, though, so I am not offended.

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

I always get assumed:

That I'm dreading my hair
That I SHOULD dread my hair
That I should try *insert another style* and that I'll look cute with it
One person asked me "How long you staying like this?"

 

[My Friend]

Love it!Keep'em coming

 

[Janet']

 

[Strangefruittree]

They assume that my hair is the indication of the heart and soul of my body, so that when my curls are flat ironed straight I have magically gone through some change... Like I AM SASHA FIERCE! or some ish... NOpe.. same ole me with a different hair do

 

[SweetSpirit86]

Oooh...that comment about the way men approach you is so true!! When I protective style under a straight haired wig...I get hollered at...literally. Little boys wanna yell and mess at me with that "aye gurl" crap like I'm fresh out of high school (college..and I have a babyface so they assume we're the same age I guess) like them. When I take it down and give my hair a break from the bobby pins and such, I get approached in a much classier way from -men.- I emphasize men, here. I'm told I'm a natural beauty, my hair suits me, and yes...the queen comments, lol. I'm not complaining about those at ALL! It's just amazing how a change in hairstyle can affect the way I'm approached.

I tend to ignore all the negative assumptions people make, though...the only one that irks me a little is the lesbian one. I can't wear a pair of sweats with my fro out without a slew of lesbians thinking I swing that way. I don't have a problem with you, but why does short curly hair equal change in sexual preferences? I don't get that.

 

[nique3]

That I'm "Down with the cause"....whatever that means.

That I'm trying to "get in touch with my african roots"....and people have told me these things to my face.

 

[mush211]

You know this is a trip because a lovely young lady at work for the past 2 years have gone natural and her hair is beautiful thick and healthy her family and friends assume the same thing and now is at APL in braids and they are trying to give her hair advice and she they all have busted broken and weaved up hair and under those weaves is still busted broken hair and the edges are beating Michael Jackson at doing the moon walk I mean they really give Susan Taylor a run for her money and they are still saying

When you gonna get a perm

yeah right. Giving her much Grief that when you all grow your hair out then we can all get perms together. They were like naw you got that growing good hair we don't have that kind of hair. She was like you are my Identical TWIN SISTER FOOL We have the exact same DNA makeup

!!!!!!!LMAO.....

 

[MonPetite]

That I'm insane.

On good days.

We need a regional map, for LHCFers on negative and positive reactions to Natural Hair, LOL!

 

[mush211]

The ones thaT REALLY erk my nerves are the
"It's just a fad. U'll relax it soon".....ummm no. Why wud I go back to the stuff that jacked my hair up in the first place?

 

[MissRissa]

omg i wish people would think i was afrocentric, or pro-black, militant, or whichever way you choose to describe it, it would be slightly more accurate. since im a lite brite, all i get are people who try to convince me that i'm not really black. this dude actually sat down and tried to break down "ethnic heritage" to me like i'm slow. i guess since i dont identify as an octaroon or quadroon, i need to be educated. or, for lack of a better phrase, people think im a little um "valleygirlish".

oh and i do get the constant explanations of why they can't go natural. "oh my hair won't curl up like that. I got them n*gga naps". That makes me cringe every time. i dont even have the huge, loose, silky curls. im 3c/4a and my hair is cottony. Ive actually gotten other natural sistas who hit me up with "what did you put in your hair to make it do that?" um conditioner, didn't u just rock your hair curly last week? what did you do to yours?

oh and i've had people call me lazy cause i choose to straighten once every few months. when i bun, i'm just being lazy cause i dont want to do my hair. which is kinda true. i so dont feel like detangling daily. but that has nothing to do with me straightening it.

 

[Ms.Christ3n]

I've gotten so far:

1.) I'm a hippie, tree hugger, vegan ( I love trees and am vegetarian, but still....hippie?erplexed)
2.) I'm mixed with something because I have "good hair" ( as dark as I am?I'm NW50 )
3.) I went natural because it is just the trend right now ( I've been transitioning since 2008!)