"Why do so many blacks prefer straight hair?"

[Sugar]

I don't argue in extremes, I don't see extremities in other people's arguments when there are none. Anyone who is reasonable and have any sort of experience with life will know that nothing is completely black and white or conclusive. Never once did I say that how every black woman ppl choose to style their hair is based on slavery and colonialism. The OP asked about the majority of blacks preferring straight hair, and I addressed the OP's question. In addition, I addressed the ways that slavery and colonialism resulted in the rejection of black features including nappy/kinky hair.

You are free to defend your personal choices, but I'm not attacking anyone in my posts, I'm simply speaking about history and the demonstratable impacts of slavery/colonialism.

That's the great thing about human beings...we grow and change. Perhaps those things had an impact on why much of previous generations straightened their hair, but it probably isn't the same for Today's Black Woman (ugh that sounded like a commercial for tampons or something).

Can someone point me to the place where there is concrete evidence or statistics about what the majority of Black women do with their hair? I've seen numbers on buying habits...but I'm looking for something that specifies how we choose to wear our hair. Because I have never been asked to participate in any such study.

If it doesn't exist can someone please conduct said study? Or how about somebody bother to ask the majority of Black women why they choose to wear their hair the way they do?

 

[arosieworld]

Obviously, we all have some form of privilege; however, in this country, one's racial privilege has been the most far-reaching across other cultures and races. You can deny it; but, it's true (I've heard the "we all have privileges" debate technique when pointing out racial privilege).

Your message wasn't lost on me. To be curious is natural; however, some curiousness can lead to "othering" (e.g. exoticizing another group, pinpointing one's differences as abnormal).

Out of curiosity, why the concern for "putting agendas" on the words/feelings of white women when they "other" you or the OP instead of the concern with how she or the OP's friend's covert views on you and other black women? Mind you, the OP's friend didn't ask her personally about her straight hair? She asked her about ALL BLACK WOMEN as though we're some monolithic group with one mind (which is a constant). She doesn't see black women as individuals, which is a problem. The OP (and you) are expected to speak for the entire group. I know you want to be in her shoes (which, sad to say, won't happen, even with good intentions, until society changes) and I get it the intention. Now, it appears that the OP came to the forum because something didn't seem right about the question and she respectfully wanted various views. I think you are giving her friend unwarranted benefit of the doubt, especially as other forum members discussed how this has happened to them or how the subject permeates society continuously.

Let me reiterate I don't want you to feel attacked; but, in my eyes, I'm seeing the perpetrators of this heinous system get off with the aforementioned unwarranted benefit of the doubt (e.g. innocent questions when there's such things as Google and LHCF to answer some of them). Therefore, the system continues because no one calls them on it. As said before, any relationship does not alleviate such perpetual issues.

By the way, I'm a relaxed hair, who has thought about going natural, or perhaps, texlaxing. I flip-flop, depending on my mood. But, yeah, I want to see what my real texture is again.

I sorry but to me that is just sad. I can't constantly be on the ready to call people out. I will give people the benefit of the doubt. I do understand naivety. I do understand how conversations among friends can bridge cultures. I do understand how the opinion of a person you trust can shape your view of, yes, an entire race. (thats how racism spreads but it can also be how understanding spreads). I refuse to see this world as a "system" that is out to get me.

 

[Sugar]

I wonder why no one ever asks white and other non-black women why they alter their hair so much? And believe me...they do. Why are we always the targets?[/QUOTE]

sorry to hear about your modeling career being hampered for cosmetic reasons,

and the bolded was the reason for my first comment. Black women are the only ones who catch it for doing something different to how we look. Women in Brazil do all kinds of crap to themselves, Asian women get nose jobs... I mean I can tell of you of one common thing every race of women does to itself on the regular,but WE are the only ones who get flack for it.

I wonder if there are forums are asking the tons of white women why they dye their hair blonde.... **sighs & twiddles thumbs***

Thank you. I blame my parents...somehow they managed to create a child that's even shorter than they are. Where's the justice in that???

I just joined Long Hair Community today...perhaps I should ask them why they dye their hair blond. :scratchch

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

Why do so many blacks prefer straight hair?

The same reason why so many prefer a certain texture over another. It's evident here and the real world.

Honestly we can go round round on this issue for ever. It's been brought up millions of times here. I don't think there is just one answer for this question.

 

[LoveisYou]

It's sad but this thread is an example of of the historical ignorace that is so prevalent in our culture. How is it possible to live in this country and not know the historical basis of beauty standards? How is it possible not to recognize the ways in which history have impacted today? How can you not recognize that the reasons so many black women bleach their skin and straighten their hair has a lot to do with the historical onslaught on our physical makeup? How can we not recognize the preference for light skin, "pretty hair" and light eyes as connected with slavery and colonialsim?
Is it just an accident that so many negative connotations are attached to natural hair?

I do see a small light of hope though. More women are embracing their natural hair, more naturals are being featured in commericials etc. Hopefully, our liitle black girls are taking notice and that it will have a positive effect on their self-esteem. I for one want little black girls to realize that beauty comes in all forms. For once, I want to see a study where little black girls won't overwhemingly show a preference for white dolls. I want them to be influenced by a media that shows them beauty in all forms.

 

[chrisanddonniesmommy]

I sorry but to me that is just sad. I can't constantly be on the ready to call people out. I will give people the benefit of the doubt. I do understand naivety. I do understand how conversations among friends can bridge cultures. I do understand how the opinion of a person you trust can shape your view of, yes, an entire race. (thats how racism spreads but it can also be how understanding spreads). I refuse to see this world as a "system" that is out to get me.

We'll have to agree to disagree. I acknowledge our society as one that has placed black women on the low end of the totem pole. I don't deny or ignore it, that's all, and there's nothing sad about being an activist against that acknowledgement. In my thirty-something years, I've seen that benefit of the doubt go one-sided to the detrimental of others.

Good luck to you in the bridging of cultures. I hope that you're prepared that, perhaps, you will do most of the bridging for a while.

 

[Theresamonet]

This conversation made me think about ALL of the threads started and maintained by women so proud of themselves for going natural...because white people/white men love our natural texture...

I don't remember witnessing a relaxed head openly use white peoples preference for what they think black people should look like, as confirmation for their own choice of hair texture. But I have seen countless naturals do it.

Will somebody analyze that?

 

[jennboo]

It's sad but this thread is an example of of the historical ignorace that is so prevalent in our culture. How is it possible to live in this country and not know the historical basis of beauty standards? How is it possible not to recognize the ways in which history have impacted today? How can you not recognize that the reasons so many black women bleach their skin and straighten their hair has a lot to do with the historical onslaught on our physical makeup? How can we not recognize the preference for light skin, "pretty hair" and light eyes as connected with slavery and colonialsim?
Is it just an accident that so many negative connotations are attached to natural hair?

I do see a small light of hope though. More women are embracing their natural hair, more naturals are being featured in commericials etc. Hopefully, our liitle black girls are taking notice and that it will have a positive effect on their self-esteem. I for one want little black girls to realize that beauty comes in all forms. For once, I want to see a study where little black girls won't overwhemingly show a preference for white dolls. I want them to be influenced by a media that shows them beauty in all forms.

Bolded:
You know what? I refuse to believe that some of these women are that dense. I refuse. I think people know exactly where the motivations lie and what the implications of chemicalizing their hair are. Many just don't want to hear or acknowledge it because they'd still like to indulge in the practice guilt-free for their menz, their jobs, to fit in, to look 'fly' , and whatever else.

 

[chrisanddonniesmommy]

This conversation made me think about ALL of the threads started and maintained by women so proud of themselves for going natural...because white people/white men love our natural texture...

I don't remember witnessing a relaxed head openly use white peoples preference for what they think black people should look like, as confirmation for their own choice of hair texture. But I have seen countless naturals do it.

Will somebody analyze that?

Why would that have to when one's trying to fit the norm? I've found that most of that "love" is lip-service anyway.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

You know what? I refuse to believe that some of these women are that dense. I refuse. I think people know exactly where the motivations lie and what the implications of chemicalizing their hair are. Many just don't want to hear or acknowledge it because they'd still like to indulge in the practice guilt-free for their menz, their jobs, to fit in, to look 'fly' , and whatever else.

Actually, you'd be surprised how many women have never taken a single Africana course or read books/articles on the history of African's in Antiquity or the trans-atlantic slave trade. I think thats why its so easy for some to honestly believe that the preference for european traits is somehow organic.

 

[LovelyNaps26]

Girl, don't you know? Black people read books, major in English and Philosophy, go to law school and medical school, become vegetarians and vegans, convert to Catholicism, play tennis and golf, summer in the Hamptons, travel abroad, play classical musical instruments, run marathons, and drive hybrids, use organic products, shop at Whole Foods, adopt babies from Africa, wear Ed Hardy, go to Ivy League Schools, recycle, eat sushi, sip wine, go camping, and straighten our hair to be WHITE.

*sarcasm*

Everything in the list EXCEPT hair texture is a product of nurture (social factors and practices external to an individual that results from socialization) and not nature. Just sayin'

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

if you ladies can tirelessly continue with this passion......
i certainly should be able to get my old arse up and write this paper

(drawing motivation wherever i can)

 

[Theresamonet]

Everything in the list EXCEPT hair texture is a product of nurture (social factors and practices external to an individual that results from socialization) and not nature. Just sayin'

But wouldn't CHANGING your hair texture fall under nurture. Nature would be to remain natural. Just Saying.

 

[chrisanddonniesmommy]

But wouldn't CHANGING your hair texture fall under nurture. Nature would be to remain natural. Just Saying.

Yeah, it is. I'm a product of nurture, which is funny considering that my mother, aunt, and cousins are all naturals now.

 

[dynamic1]

This conversation made me think about ALL of the threads started and maintained by women so proud of themselves for going natural...because white people/white men love our natural texture...

I don't remember witnessing a relaxed head openly use white peoples preference for what they think black people should look like as confirmation for their own choice of hair texture. But I have seen countless naturals do it.

Will somebody analyze that?

Umm, there is no analysis necessary. That question has been answered in this thread- colonialism, racism, acceptance from the dominant culture, etc.

Although, I have never seen anyone state, "I am so proud of going natural because white people/white men love our natural texture."

People really want to turn this into a natural vs. relaxed thread. Why not start another thread for your question? This one asked "why do so many blacks prefer their hair straight?"

 

[drappedup]

I don't get why it's an issue.......so WHAT if someone prefers their hair to be a certain texture? Or color? I don't get it. It's none of my business. I have bigger, more troubling worries. The world has bigger, more troubling worries than why a group of people happens to prefer a hair texture a certain way.......

 

[LaFemmeNaturelle]

Over half of all women black or white with gray hair dye it. A feature predominant to old people. Where is the concern? There isn't any because its a simple choice someone makes for their personal style. No one is ignoring history, but history only started us on the path to relax for those that continue to walk that path it is now choice.

I know my opinion probably doesn't matter but I actually am very concerned with how the media portrays women and how we think there's something wrong with gray hair. Why do women feel the need to dye their hair just to be beautiful? What is wrong with aging?....yeah this is OT but I just hate those commercials that talk about dyeing grays and being beautiful again. Aint nothin wrong with gray!

Carry on.....

 

[Theresamonet]

Umm, there is no analysis necessary. That question has been answered in this thread- colonialism, racism, acceptance from the dominant culture, etc.

Although, I never seen anyone state, "I am so proud of going natural because white people/white men love our natural texture."

People really want to turn this into a natural vs. relaxed thread. Why not start another thread for your question? This one asked "why do so many blacks prefer their hair straight?"

Umm, the reason I asked that question in this thread is because I wanted to bring light to the fact that relaxed heads are not the only ones affected by "colonialism, racism, acceptance from the dominant culture, etc." I believe that is very relevant to this thread. If you couldn't connect the two or see what I was getting at then...

This was a natural vs. relaxed thread from the moment the first character was typed into the Op...check the disclaimer.

 

[Sounique]

This thread can go on and on without end, because there is no right or wrong answer. It's all a matter of opinion.

How can you argue with someone else's belief?

How can you determine that your "point of view" is superior to another?

There have been so many opposing posts in this thread that I can stand on the sideline and agree with each if I look through the writer's eyes. Although my own perception is different from my stance.

Perhaps some of our ancestors did choose to relax their hair to appease the "white man" and on the same note, it's possible that they could have passed this same type of inferior thinking down through the generations. I absolutely agree that a portion of our black population are brainwashed by history in one way or the other.

Now let us flip that coin...

Not every black person that relaxes their hair does it because they don't like their hair texture or are a victim of the slave mentality. There's nothing wrong with wanting to wear your hair straight. It's simply a style choice. Some naturals straighten their hair on occasion. Are they brainwashed too? Some white people wear curly perms and dreadlocks. Are they trying to be black?

Some white people tan. Do they hate themselves and want to be black?


What is the big issue with the relaxer? People get breast implants, wear weaves, fake nails, fake eyelashes, dye their hair, fake noses, fake butts, lip injections, eyebrow lifts, chin and cheek implants, colored contact lenses and so on, but if a black woman relaxes her hair then it's self hate.

It's only hair. People of every race alter their natural appearance in 1 form or another. It's only an outward adornment and by no means reflects the inner person or speaks for their entire race.

Take Albert Einstein for example...
Based on outwardly appearance alone, how intelligent did he appear?

Relaxed hair does not = inferiority
(but then again, that's my opinion)

 

[dynamic1]

Umm, the reason I asked that question in this thread is because I wanted to bring light to the fact that relaxed heads are not the only ones affected by "colonialism, racism, acceptance from the dominant culture, etc." I believe that is very relevant to this thread. If you couldn't connect the two or see what I was getting at then...

This was a natural vs. relaxed thread from the moment the first character was typed into the Op...check the disclaimer.

Isn't that a given... the entire black community was impacted...which created the preference for straight hair. erplexed

Great, we agree on the bold!

 

[nappystorm]

Well you got cockle burrs standing all over your head
Well you got sandy spurs, I'd rather have mine instead
You're just a Jiggaboo tryna find something to do
Well you're just a Wannabe, wannbe better than me.

Your hair ain't no longer than *snap*
So you'll never fling it all back
Your ashamed to walk in the rain,
Oh what a shame who's to blame?
Don't you ever worry bout that
Cause I don't mind being black...

Talking about good and bad hair
Whether you're dark or you're fair...

 

[CocoGlow]

[/B]
Since I assume that you are specifically responding to MY response with the bottom bolded...

A. Please do not assume that you know my stance about relaxed hair and natural hair. As I stated, I have been natural and I am currently transitioning. I big chopped after 2 months of transitioning last time, and only relaxed (after 10 months) because I got extensive heat damage, and did not want to start over.

with that being said...when i was natural...i always wore my hair curly. you can look at my album if you wish. It was my first time pressing when i suffered damage, and i was devastated.

B. I'm transitioning long term so that i will have long NATURAL hair, vs short hair (in any state). In the mean time...while my hair is SHORT, I will be wearing styles that stretch my length and frame MY face. Never did i say that relaxed=sexy...if I felt that way, I wouldnt be transitioning. please re-read my original post if you are mistaken.

Oh my post was not directed at any ONE response ... so while I was referring to your post about preferring LONG hair to go with your face shape, I was also responding to many other posts about wanting SEXY hair and equating sexy w/ relaxed hair ...

Just wanted to add:

What if the original post was about a White girl asking her friend about a trend she noticed w/ Black girls wearing blue/green/grey/hazel contacts?

Would we still say these Black women just have a preference for light eyes & it has NOTHING to do w/ something waay deeper?

Would we justify it by saying that XYZ% of White people also wear colored contacts that are not their natural color?

Would we not see a HUGE problem if over 75% of Black women started wearing light contacts?

Would we say "it's ok, they just love the look-it's their choice"?

What if it became such an epidemic that these Black women would not want to be seen without their contacts....would not think they could get a job....would not think they could get a man....would not think they were beautiful at all without their "pretty light eyes"?

The only difference is the typical brown eye color of Black women is not associated w/ years of ridicule like the Kinks & Napps that grow out of our head, so while the colored contacts thing has been a trend, it has not turned into an epidemic like relaxing. Although I take issue with Black women walking around w/ blue/green/grey/hazel contacts and would certainly be alarmed if a large percentage were doing it, contacts are very temporary, unlike the relaxer....

I personally don't see anything wrong w/ wearing straight styles, but like was mentioned by others, the Black woman's relationship w/ the relaxers & straight/wavy/silky curly "Indian Remi--Goooooood hair!!!" weaves IS an epidemic rooted in something waaay deeper than style choice.

Maybe when NATURAL hair becomes viewed by most Black women as desirable and they don't feel IMPELLED to "fix those napps" on themselves and their little girls, then maybe, just maybe straight hair will really be viewed as just another style choice - and not a prerequisite for Black beauty

BTW, I honestly don't think that the majority of relaxed women on LHCF are slapping relaxers on their daughter's heads and spewing out hateful things about their hair texture, but we have to realize that the women on LHCF are only a very small fragment...so while YOU & YOU & YOU may not feel like you are brainwashed or harbor any self-hate, can you really ignore the mentality behind what is going on in your communities? THAT is where the problem lies so this is not a personal attack on anyone...rather an analysis of a BIGGER problem...

 

[kmn1980]

I think you missed one..

Women with naturally straight hair wanting tightly coiled hair.
(ETA: minus the handful of asians)

I wonder, if asked, would over 1/2 of the silky haired black folx want nappy hair since, you know, people always want what they don't have

I don't understand how anyone can compare white women coloring their hair with blacks preference for straight hair. I by no means believe that all black women who relax their hair are self-hating. A black women can choose to wear her hair however she sees fit. Nevertheless, when a majority of the ppl in a group rejects a feature they were born with, there's a problem.

A closer observation will demonstrate that the problem lies in the historical indoctrination of black as undesirable. Everything about black was attacked - the character of blacks, the cultures, and the physical characteristics. When you think about the beauty totem pole nappy hair, broad nose, dark skin etc. stands on the opposite end of straight hair, thin nose, light skin. Nappy hair has been and continues to be deemed undesirable. While white women might color their hair for superficial reasons many African-American relax because they believe their natural hair is undesirable - that's a difference.

Black women on a whole prefer straight hair because most Black women are still very much psychologically colonized.

We are inundated with images of straight haired women being the feminine ideal from infancy in this country and it has a tremendous impact when you were born with afro textured hair. These women in the media are mostly white and the few Blacks are relaxed or weaved up. It is not just a coincidence that over 75% of Black women drastically and permanently alter their hair to be type 1-3. There are millions of black women that will spend every dime of their paycheck regularly for some weave and go on and on bragging about the fact that they are now in ownership of some Asian/Indian hair and gush over the innate beauty and superiority of this hair....its all over youtube....and it just goes to show you the premium we put of hair types that are the exact opposite of ours.

There are millions of Black women that have never known a healthy relationship with their hair because their mothers were so busy treating it like it was type 1 and destroying it and calling it bad that they default to the relaxers. This is a tradition of self-hate that goes back generations. Cultural norms do not materialize out of thin air.

In my experience, I think I can safely say that most Black women have a conscious or sub-conscious inferiority complex about their hair....you can see it with the testimonials of most of the newbies and some of their harrowing tales of having relaxers slapped on their heads from as early as 2 years of age.

Why White Women's Hair Practices Cannot be Compared to Us Relaxing​

Finally, I see many women are making the argument that we are no different then other races of women in terms of hair. Let me lay out why that is false:

- When a white woman gets hair extensions, she gets extensions that MATCH her own natural texture. She sees her own texture as beautiful and she knows her hair has the potential to grow long, she's just impatient and wants the look now.

- When a Black woman gets a weave, she gets a texture that is the complete antithesis of her natural texture, she extolls that as beautiful, and see's it as superior. She is usually unaware that her hair can grow as long as the weave.

- When a white woman Bleaches her hair Blonde....she is emulating fellow white women that they deem to be beautiful.

- When a Black Woman Relaxes her hair to be type 1 she is trying to emulate the dominant race...weather she realizes that on a conscious level or not.

- When a Black woman puts on her weave she is boasting about the myriad of other races she feels she looks like now and saying she now has pretty hair like them.

- When a White woman get her hair extensions she is boasting about the new length and added thickness.

- If a Black person see's a white person with long hair, its to be expected. If a Black woman has long hair....well she must have "good hair" and be mixed with some "good hair" having race.

None of this is a coincidence. The preference for white skin, straight hair and light eyes did not just materialize from thin air.

Because the plight of a white woman and her hair is very different than a black woman and hers. Especially a nappy haired black woman. Why are folx acting brand new over this issue (not you Sugar)? What is the history of the white woman and the color of her hair? How about the history of an aa woman? Which woman was scorned, mocked, beaten, burned, and brutalized due to her physical attributes?
For the record, i don't think that every woman of color that relaxes her hair has issues of self hate. But more often than not a lot of aa women are disgusted by their naps.

Obviously, we all have some form of privilege; however, in this country, one's racial privilege has been the most far-reaching across other cultures and races. You can deny it; but, it's true (I've heard the "we all have privileges" debate technique when pointing out racial privilege).

Your message wasn't lost on me. To be curious is natural; however, some curiousness can lead to "othering" (e.g. exoticizing another group, pinpointing one's differences as abnormal).

Out of curiosity, why the concern for "putting agendas" on the words/feelings of white women when they "other" you or the OP instead of the concern with how she or the OP's friend's covert views on you and other black women? Mind you, the OP's friend didn't ask her personally about her straight hair? She asked her about ALL BLACK WOMEN as though we're some monolithic group with one mind (which is a constant). She doesn't see black women as individuals, which is a problem. The OP (and you) are expected to speak for the entire group. I know you want to be in her shoes (which, sad to say, won't happen, even with good intentions, until society changes) and I get it the intention. Now, it appears that the OP came to the forum because something didn't seem right about the question and she respectfully wanted various views. I think you are giving her friend unwarranted benefit of the doubt, especially as other forum members discussed how this has happened to them or how the subject permeates society continuously.

Let me reiterate I don't want you to feel attacked; but, in my eyes, I'm seeing the perpetrators of this heinous system get off with the aforementioned unwarranted benefit of the doubt (e.g. innocent questions when there's such things as Google and LHCF to answer some of them). Therefore, the system continues because no one calls them on it. As said before, any relationship does not alleviate such perpetual issues.

By the way, I'm a relaxed hair, who has thought about going natural, or perhaps, texlaxing. I flip-flop, depending on my mood. But, yeah, I want to see what my real texture is again.

Its uncomfortable to do, but sometimes we have to sit down, be still, and ask ourselves why it is that we do what we do.

WHY is straight hair preferred over 75% of the time by Black Women to the hair that grows out of our heads?

75-80% of the time? To the point that Black mothers relax small children?

Do people honestly think this is just a preference that they spontaneously, organically and independently arrived at?

Like, seriously???

It's sad but this thread is an example of of the historical ignorace that is so prevalent in our culture. How is it possible to live in this country and not know the historical basis of beauty standards? How is it possible not to recognize the ways in which history have impacted today? How can you not recognize that the reasons so many black women bleach their skin and straighten their hair has a lot to do with the historical onslaught on our physical makeup? How can we not recognize the preference for light skin, "pretty hair" and light eyes as connected with slavery and colonialsim? Is it just an accident that so many negative connotations are attached to natural hair?

I've seen that benefit of the doubt go one-sided to the detrimental of others.

Good luck to you in the bridging of cultures. I hope that you're prepared that, perhaps, you will do most of the bridging for a while.

Bolded:
You know what? I refuse to believe that some of these women are that dense. I refuse. I think people know exactly where the motivations lie and what the implications of chemicalizing their hair are. Many just don't want to hear or acknowledge it because they'd still like to indulge in the practice guilt-free for their menz, their jobs, to fit in, to look 'fly' , and whatever else.

There are some beautiful logic bombs going off in here.

 

[Kash]

Black women on a whole prefer straight hair because most Black women are still very much psychologically colonized.

We are inundated with images of straight haired women being the feminine ideal from infancy in this country and it has a tremendous impact when you were born with afro textured hair. These women in the media are mostly white and the few Blacks are relaxed or weaved up. It is not just a coincidence that over 75% of Black women drastically and permanently alter their hair to be type 1-3. There are millions of black women that will spend every dime of their paycheck regularly for some weave and go on and on bragging about the fact that they are now in ownership of some Asian/Indian hair and gush over the innate beauty and superiority of this hair....its all over youtube....and it just goes to show you the premium we put of hair types that are the exact opposite of ours.

There are millions of Black women that have never known a healthy relationship with their hair because their mothers were so busy treating it like it was type 1 and destroying it and calling it bad that they default to the relaxers. This is a tradition of self-hate that goes back generations. Cultural norms do not materialize out of thin air.

In my experience, I think I can safely say that most Black women have a conscious or sub-conscious inferiority complex about their hair....you can see it with the testimonials of most of the newbies and some of their harrowing tales of having relaxers slapped on their heads from as early as 2 years of age.

Why White Women's Hair Practices Cannot be Compared to Us Relaxing​

Finally, I see many women are making the argument that we are no different then other races of women in terms of hair. Let me lay out why that is false:

- When a white woman gets hair extensions, she gets extensions that MATCH her own natural texture. She sees her own texture as beautiful and she knows her hair has the potential to grow long, she's just impatient and wants the look now.

- When a Black woman gets a weave, she gets a texture that is the complete antithesis of her natural texture, she extolls that as beautiful, and see's it as superior. She is usually unaware that her hair can grow as long as the weave.

- When a white woman Bleaches her hair Blonde....she is emulating fellow white women that they deem to be beautiful.

- When a Black Woman Relaxes her hair to be type 1 she is trying to emulate the dominant race...weather she realizes that on a conscious level or not.

- When a Black woman puts on her weave she is boasting about the myriad of other races she feels she looks like now and saying she now has pretty hair like them.

- When a White woman get her hair extensions she is boasting about the new length and added thickness.

- If a Black person see's a white person with long hair, its to be expected. If a Black woman has long hair....well she must have "good hair" and be mixed with some "good hair" having race.

None of this is a coincidence. The preference for white skin, straight hair and light eyes did not just materialize from thin air.

girl you are doing nothing but preaching the TRUTH up in here!

 

[JuiceMobsta]

Its uncomfortable to do, but sometimes we have to sit down, be still, and ask ourselves why it is that we do what we do.

WHY is straight hair preferred over 75% of the time by Black Women to the hair that grows out of our heads?

75-80% of the time? To the point that Black mothers relax small children?

Do people honestly think this is just a preference that they spontaneously, organically and independently arrived at?

Like, seriously???

Or better yet, if relaxers or pressing combs(flat irons) never came about in the past out of people trying to conform to society, would it still just be a "styling option" for you today?? No, because it probably wouldnt even exist. Where our practices originate from do make a difference, because if not for these practices in the past, they would not be that prevalent in society as it is today. You wouldnt see all these relaxers on shelves depicting black women on the cover with their "straight" hair. These so called "styling options" are still fueled in part today by the same thing that originally brought them about.

People may like to think of it as just a simple styling option, but when the vast majority of bw have straight hair and given our history, it becomes far more than just a simple styling option. It is a direct result of the past/present attempts to conform with society.

Its just like on tv shows/movies, if someone were to go back in time and change one small thing and then come back to the present, it would be a world of difference. If we went back in time and uninvented(lol) the relaxer or pressing comb, would we still be on here having this conversation?:scratchch

 

[LeNghtyDreAms]

Still be careful. White privilege isn't alleviated through friendship or other relationships. It will be pulled out when necessary and beneficial to the person, regardless of his or her friends, spouses/lovers, etc.

Next thing you know other "innocent" questions will arise, like "Why do black people want light skin?" or "Why are black people so loud?" Remember, you can always say that you aren't the spokeswoman for black people.

@ the bold, what's wrong with these questions, shoot I ask them myself.I ask why Asian people are so rude, bump into and don't say excuse me.

And at OP: Since the creation of the flat iron and the relaxer, black women have busted their butts to have straight hair. Years and years of black women straightening their hair it became what was expected.After generations of relaxers and many BW weren't taught how to care for their natural texture therefore it became easier to take care of straightened hair. Its more visually pleasing because its whats was normal and in most cases today is still normal.I prefered straight hair until I found LHCF because before that all I knew was straight hair. I hadnt met any black females with natural hair unless they were mixed and had 2a to 3b hair. When I first went natural my mom thought i was crazy and didn't like the look. Now she no longer gets a relaxer and wears her hair natural or a weave.
Point is, if you see everyone else around you with the same style clothes, you'll eventually like that style yourself. Just saying.

Curly or straight, light or dark, loud or quiet, ghetto or proper, we will always be different, and it is our difference that makes us special. As long as we're who we are, people will be curious, whether it is their curiosity steming from jealousy or admiration; who cares!? Rock your curls or your relaxer cause we can do that!

 

[ThePerfectScore]

since i posted it in RT i thought I'd post it here

In regards to the straight hair thread... the issue is not liking straight hair, but rather why one likes straight hair. Whether we like it or not the effects of colonialism and the white ideal is embedded in our culture and many cultures around the world. The thing about privilege is that it's invisible--- it's been said time and time again, but is so true. Privilege is being the norm and the standard against which all others are judged. Just so happens there's tons of white privilege in the world. Will that stop me from buying a new flat iron? No- it won't... but I also don't want to be ignorant to the factors that lead me to this view of beauty. Yes I love my kinky curly afro, but I also can't wait to be MBL so I can straighten my hair and have it slinging and swinging all around- why is this beautiful to me.... b/c of history and my natural inclination to view things society approves of as beautiful.

 

[ThePerfectScore]

* I Never read this book just fyi, but the title says it all

 

[silkii_locks]

For me, strait hair was just easier to care for. It had nothing to do with brain washing or self hatred. I was relaxed at an early age so I guess it was all I knew. I had been traumatized at an early age when I was natural with long hair. I was so tender headed and all my mom did was hot comb my hair. I still remember the burned hair smell. I would ideally love long natural hair, so that is a future goal of mine.

You took the words right outta my mouth. I just like being able to "deal" with my hair without having to devote half the weekend to it.

 

[lovegymnasts]

I wonder why no one ever asks white and other non-black women why they alter their hair so much? And believe me...they do. Why are we always the targets?

I'm weird because I actually do. It's something that perplexes me. Generally, they look confounded as if it never occurred to them to question why. Most of the responses I get are because I don't like my hair color and I think I look better with lighter hair or blond is prettier. When I ask them why they think this, they can't tell me why.