I'm just going to say this and then I'm out of this thread, LOL...
Everyone has their defenses up...first off, I could careless what other races do to there hair or why they do it, their culture and history isn't mine and that's all I have to say about that. A lot of people want to put the tag on relaxers as being simply just a style...ok, that's fine...I don't have a problem with people relaxing their hair, you do you. In the end, it IS a preference. The only issue I somewhat have is with people ignoring or discrediting why we even have this product called a relaxer in the first place (regarless of whether or not you decide to wear one) or when you mention it, bringing up what "other people do" to justify things. Relaxers were not created for managability, they were not created simply for "style" or because it was "trendy", they were created because we were made to hate our hair, hate who we are and hate our features. They were made because we wanted to loook more like our white counterparts with hopes of being more accepted, period. That is fact, that is history, and that is why we have the relaxer and this theme has carried through generation to generation as we see in some of the responses from relaxed heads in this very thread, even with many of us not being aware on conscious of it. Now if you want to put another spin on it, give it a new "modern day definition", cool, that's up to you, just please don't ignore, discredit, or belittle our history. History will NEVER be irrelevant. If you read the original advertisements and promotions for relaxer products from back in the day....I assure that many of you may feel some type of way. You can say "Well, that was a long time ago....that's not valid today! You read too much into things...it's not that serious"....that's cool too, it's your beliefs and thoughts, I'm not going to beat anyone up for that.
I just encourage you all to think about this...What if the relaxer never existed? Would we even have an issue with thinking that natural hair is unmanagable??? Would we have so many young people walking around with damaged unsightly heads of broken short hair? Would there even be this debate of natural vs. relaxed? Would people go around saying "Urrrgh, I need a touch up, my hair is too nappy!...She has good hair...I'd only wear my hair natural if it curled up like hers." I've even had a friend say to me "You are the kind of person black people hate because your hair curls up"....would we even have thoughts like these? Ok, maybe it's not worth thinking about these things because we do have the relaxer.
I swear I feel like I'm in a scene from School Daze "talkin' bout good or bad hair" when I come here and IRL sometimes, LOL.
In the end, it's all a matter of personal preference, regarldless of what factors the preference is based on, it's a personal decision. There is no need to get defensive on either side, and there is no need for either side to attack one another. Naturals, everyone is not going to give up relaxing their hair...that's a fact, it is what it is. There is enlightening and encouraging, and then there is belittling and bashing and we need to be careful about not crossing that line. The only thing I challenge everyone to do is to understand certain things, not to IGNORE them, blow them off, or "brush them under the rug". It seems like we value our history and "knowing where we come from" when it comes to stuff like the Civil Rights Movement, the "act" of slavery, famous blacks in history, etc. etc., but when it comes down to stuff like this hair thing, or the some of "slave mentality" regarding various things, as subtle or as much of an undercurrent it may be, we tend to look at it as "not important", not want to accept that history is why we do certain things. We get defensive when it's brought up and respond with something to the effect of "it's not that serious, can't it just be a style?" We as people do a lot of things as a result of habit...habits based on things that go back further than 24 hours, a week, or even 5 years ago. I HATE and despise the history of this product. All these things for ME have encouraged me to stay natural, although as much as it would make me happy if it did, they may not do the same for you, and to me, there's nothing wrong with that, but don't discredit it or lable it as insignificant. It does not bother me that people relax because I understand that whole thing...some of you say it's just a style, nothing more, nothing less...that's fine, but understand where the style came from and don't deny that, and then move on.
I say happy hair growing!
I'm out!
Yall have seen my relaxed fro, limp is NOT the word to describe it
) BUT compared to my natural hair it IS limper. That meant the relaxer worked. Straight hair is limper than curled hair and definielt limper than coiled hair. Now as far as the lifeless comment, thats how she feels. You feel the opposite but I think we should all respect each others opinions even if you dont agree with them. If she feels negatively about relaxed hair then thats okay. Lets not jump on her for her opinions.....
*sigh*
My bad, I just wanted to steer the convo back on topic to individual opinions.
erplexed
VERY WELL SAID! You spoke the truth here, so1913! 
Today I'm thinking relaxer. But I have a confession to make. I really don't see what the big deal is about natural vs relaxed (ducking as I wait for people to throw things). 
OK. End of discussion.
