Where to Meet "Good" Black Men

[TinyBlu]

...and please don't say church. I grew up in church and found the church boys to be some of the worst behaving brothers of all, and I am not a religious person. I would prefer not to even go there.

As I try to re-enter the dating scene after a hiatus, I am so disappointed in the lack of men of color where I would normally look.

It is my belief that the best way to connect with someone with whom you share similar interests is to actually engage in those things and see who shows up... No dice. I've been to bookstores, coffee shops, lounges (the few black men there were entertaining the white women), happy hours in the business district, physical fitness events, etc. All I see is old white men and/or young white men. With the exception of the lounge afore mentioned, there hasn't even been a brother in sight!

I'm not totally opposed to dating outside my race, but my preference would still be a black man. I don't want to believe the statistics on the shortage of quality men in their 30's and 40's. They can't ALL be married, with white women, gay or in prison...

Surely I'm just looking in the wrong places. I'm open to suggestions. Thanks!

 

[Mai Tai]

I never believed that there were particular places to meet "good" men. They are everywhere. However my best guess would be to go to places where men convene...sporting events, conferences, fraternity events, etc.

 

[Oneprettypa]

I agree, there are good black men everywhere. He will find you. I'd frequent the gym if you are into working out. If you don't meet anyone at least you'll have good eye candy.

I also agree with frat sponsored events. My hubs is always introducing me to his frat brothers that happen to be single. Even if you aren't into the Greek system, many educated professional men attend functions sponsored by fraternities.

Keep your eyes open at work and the grocery store too..

 

[BrickbyBrick]

Networking. Hang out with people, especially people you respect (work, school, gym, etc.). Chances are your future SO will be like them too (read: successful, attractive, etc.). They have FRIENDS, particularly single ones who have time to hang out.

Its a group environment, with little pressure. You can also get the 411 on somebody at the get together before you even need to say a word. IMO, I think that's a pretty ideal setup. Good luck!

 

[laCriolla]

I've been to bookstores, coffee shops, lounges (the few black men there were entertaining the white women), happy hours in the business district, physical fitness events, etc. All I see is old white men and/or young white men. With the exception of the lounge afore mentioned, there hasn't even been a brother in sight!

 

[WhipEffectz1]

Just put yourself out there. Life seems to happen when you least expect it. Good luck!

 

[Love Always]

Where are you located TinyBlu?

 

[felic1]

Good places to meet black men...
1. The law library in the evening.
2, The grocery store near the apartments of the resident doctors. In the fresh produce area.
3, A nice car wash?
4. A nice barber shop.
5. bowling
6. movie rental places
7. a bank?
8. any library
9. Tim hortons wifi
10. exercise club...scan for men before signing up. assess hands carefully

 

[lushcoils]

You can go to all the above suggested places and still not meet anyone for a variety of reasons.

If you go out expecting to meet men (or people in general), you probably will. Go out and be open to being friendly with everyone who looks sane if you are in a safe environment...men, women, children, dogs. See how your vibe, expectations, and outlook change after this. Good luck!

 

[thetall1]

Taking notes, Seriously...thanks lovely ladies!!

 

[LivingDol1]

What about match.com? I don't know about you guys but I've been getting tons of emails from black guys and I've only been signed up for a week...

 

[BellaLucha]

What about match.com? I don't know about you guys but I've been getting tons of emails from black guys and I've only been signed up for a week...

I agree. I've only been signed up a week as well and have already communicated with a handful of seemingly decent black men.

 

[R4L]

Whole Foods with a good hot bar around 6:45 to 7:45 weeknights

 

[TinyBlu]

These are great suggestions ladies. Work was a bust for me... mostly married white men. The one lone brother is older and a strict religious type...

I've tried Whole Foods and the gym.... white, white, white...

I am greek, and I guess I could check those places out again. My past experience has been those guys were a little young.

As for online dating... I have tried and failed. I met a couple of guys who were great in cyberspace but horrible in person (fat, ill mannered, BROKE, four kids with four baby mammas... etc.)

I just re-activated an online dating profile. Hate to say it, but giving me a visual first is probably not the best thing. I have yet to find one man that I find attractive.

I really keep trying to open my horizons ( I raised the bar extremely high for myself, so naturally, I have raised it for a man). I just can't settle.

Being single sucks, but settling sucks worse TRUST ME.

I hope I don't come off as a B%%%% in these posts. I'm really not. I just have standards and have found that they are rather hard to meet....

 

[ilong]

TinyBlu - I don't think you are coming off as a b#%*& . i think you know what you want and like many are having a difficulty meeting someone who possesses the qualities.

While I agree that you should not settle I also believe you should be receptive to a partner from another ethnicity. Your preference is what it is - but the question is what is your highest priority in terms of a mate good or black? You may not be able to meet a mate with both qualities. And your mate could be a man who is not black.