The Official Sexy and Single Thread

I feel you ladies. I'm 22(just turned), I'm newly super single(meaning no prospects) for the first time in over 4 years. I've always been at least seeing someone and for the last 3 months, nothing.

So I wanted to post that I'm having my first date in about 3 months(I'm underexaggerating)on saturday. Well it's not a formal date unless I want it to be, but this guy, whom my friend tells me is very interested in me, is coming to a bbq I'm throwing, and then if I like him he's open to drinks. I've met the guy once or twice. He's okay, a little skinny, but we'll see if this turns into anything. It might get alittle sticky actually b/c my crush/ last hookup is supposedly coming too, but we'll see. I'll let you ladies know.
 
Hey ladies!! I am single and I am enjoying it. I mean, not like that, but I don't have any real issues with being single. I don't have to check-up on anyone or consider anyone else's feelings. I hope that didn't sound mean, but you know that when you are in a relationship you really have to think for two people.

I really don't want to get into another relationship (last one of 5 years ended 2 years ago) until I am ready. I know we all have some kind of issue, be it big or small, but I want to tackle the ones that I can before I commit to another relationship (i.e. weight, insecurities)
 
I am 24 and I have been single for *gasp* over 2 years. The plan was for me to be single while I am in grad school. Well, I am about to graduate and I am slowly trying to slip back into the dating game. I can honestly say that I am nervious and completely clueless on what to do. I have met a guy that I really like, but I am too scared to ask him out. The Fear of rejection. Plus, on top of that I don't know how to get a guys attention because I have been spending the last two years avoiding them.
 
I too am single, but I have a lot of more time and energy for my son, school and me. Also, I will began to attend church and learn more about God. So, as for right now I probably will stay out of the dating scene b/c I have to clean up a few things within me. I dont want to carry this negativity I have towards men b/c of one VERY BAD MAN :nono:! I do go through emotions of feeling lonely every now and then but I am working on that as well :yep:!
 
Would you flirt with someone in a open area like a gym?

For some reason I can't. By flirting I mean eye contact, smile to show interest.

I feel awkward with all those people in the gym. It is like all eyes on you. The problem I have is that I assume all the guys that go to the gym have girlfriends. So I never really socialize at the gym. Just say hi to the staff or ask questions when I need to use a machine. Beyond that I'm about my workout. Ipod on Blast.
 
Hil84figer said:
Would you flirt with someone in a open area like a gym?

For some reason I can't. By flirting I mean eye contact, smile to show interest.

I feel awkward with all those people in the gym. It is like all eyes on you. The problem I have is that I assume all the guys that go to the gym have girlfriends. So I never really socialize at the gym. Just say hi to the staff or ask questions when I need to use a machine. Beyond that I'm about my workout. Ipod on Blast.
Click to expand...

I can't flirt at the gym either. When I am at the gym, I am all about my bizness and don't have time to flirt. Plus, most of the men at the gym I go to are gay. They hook up there all the time.
 
single.... check

sexy.... check

hmmmm... i hate being single... ALL of my close girls are either married or engaged... BUT i'm scared of committment forreal... i'm such a conundrum.. lol... and to make matters worse, i have a "friend" who is all in love with me but i decided that i can't deal with his baggage... and then a man who's always so busy that i don't get the attention i crave... but that's the one i want and who fit the majority of the criteria i have...

i guess i'm weird like that...

so i mean there's no real shortage of attention and all, but i haven't found the one that will make me un-scared to commit to one person... lol
 
SimpleBrooklyn said:
Hey ladies!! I am single and I am enjoying it. I mean, not like that, but I don't have any real issues with being single. I don't have to check-up on anyone or consider anyone else's feelings. I hope that didn't sound mean, but you know that when you are in a relationship you really have to think for two people.

I really don't want to get into another relationship (last one of 5 years ended 2 years ago) until I am ready. I know we all have some kind of issue, be it big or small, but I want to tackle the ones that I can before I commit to another relationship (i.e. weight, insecurities)
Click to expand...

I feel the same way. I was dating someone that I REALLY liked and got frustrated and dissapointed with his mixed signals knowing very well that I need to focus on me right now. especially my career.

For the most part being single is cool as long as I have friends and fam to hang out with I'm cool. I've been single for 5 years. Sometimes I do daydream about having someone to cuddle with, give me a massage, call to see how my day goes but I just reassure myself that it will come in time. I'm 23 and have my whole life to live.

What frustrates me about being single is that people atc like your a freak fo nature. One of my friends lives out of state and every time I speak to him he's like, "you still don't got a man?":ohwell:And my friend is like "well I want to ask your advice but I know you havent had a man in three years.":ohwell:
Even my mom is like" You still haven't met any guys yet?"

I'm like is it that bad to be single? I don't have to answer to anyone and I can date as many people as I choose.
 
locabouthair said:
I feel the same way. I was dating someone that I REALLY liked and got frustrated and dissapointed with his mixed signals knowing very well that I need to focus on me right now. especially my career.

For the most part being single is cool as long as I have friends and fam to hang out with I'm cool. I've been single for 5 years. Sometimes I do daydream about having someone to cuddle with, give me a massage, call to see how my day goes but I just reassure myself that it will come in time. I'm 23 and have my whole life to live.

What frustrates me about being single is that people atc like your a freak fo nature. One of my friends lives out of state and every time I speak to him he's like, "you still don't got a man?":ohwell:And my friend is like "well I want to ask your advice but I know you havent had a man in three years.":ohwell:
Even my mom is like" You still haven't met any guys yet?"

I'm like is it that bad to be single? I don't have to answer to anyone and I can date as many people as I choose.
Click to expand...

I think it's better to be single than to settle. So many women wake up in the morning looking at their SO laying next to them saying...Why am I still here, trust, I have done it myself. So, I will rather wait to find someone worthwhile than to please everybody else!
 
jturner7156 said:
I think it's better to be single than to settle. So many women wake up in the morning looking at their SO laying next to them saying...Why am I still here, trust, I have done it myself. So, I will rather wait to find someone worthwhile than to please everybody else!
Click to expand...

Word to millionth power! My frustration is not so much with finding a decent guy to marry, but finding one that 1) I am head over heels in love with; 2) is trustworthy, moral and integrity; and 3) matches up well with me education, income, age, etc wise. It seems so hard to find all three in one, and each is so important.
 
OOOKAAAYYYY...
y'all want bad date stories?
I just went out for coffee with a guy i met off a dating site.
*HE POSTED A TOTALLY DIFFERENT GUY'S PICTURE UP* :wallbash:

then told me so as he was coming to pick me up for coffee tonight,
and had the nerve to catch attitude, telling me how he thinks he looks good, and i didn't have to be there if i didn't want to, etc, cuz of the vibes i was giving him. (yes. conversation was awkward... many many silences)

Damn straight i'm giving him evilness vibes, he had someone else's picture up!

in reality, he wasn't bad looking, he really did look like morris chestnut, like he claimed... but the principle is, he faked the funk!


I don't even have a moral to my story. I laugh now...2 hours later.. but maaaaan:spinning:
 
chinadoll said:
I'm almost 22 years old and single. Never had a boyfriend, but wish i did. Sometimes I don't like coming to the relationship forum because there's always a thread that says "what romantic thing your SO did for you", or "How does your SO show you love" etc. *Sigh* I can't stand the dating scene........:sad:
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Is that you in your siggy? You've never had a boyfriend before? Girl, you are beautiful! What's wrong with these guys?
 
sunshinebeautiful said:
Is that you in your siggy? You've never had a boyfriend before? Girl, you are beautiful! What's wrong with these guys?
Click to expand...


Yep that's me. It's true, I never been kissed, had a date, had sex, etc. I feel so left behind. Thanks for the compliment, Your very beautiful as well. :heart2:
 
*Bre~Bre* said:
I'm surprised you don't have the mens beating down your door :yep: this too shall pass....
Click to expand...

Aww, thanks Bre!

I mean, guys approach me, but not the type of guys I would give the time of day to. You know how it is.

I think that's why I have all these exes in my life. At least I know what I'm dealing with.:rolleyes:
 
metro_qt said:
OOOKAAAYYYY...
y'all want bad date stories?
I just went out for coffee with a guy i met off a dating site.
*HE POSTED A TOTALLY DIFFERENT GUY'S PICTURE UP* :wallbash:

then told me so as he was coming to pick me up for coffee tonight,
and had the nerve to catch attitude, telling me how he thinks he looks good, and i didn't have to be there if i didn't want to, etc, cuz of the vibes i was giving him. (yes. conversation was awkward... many many silences)

Damn straight i'm giving him evilness vibes, he had someone else's picture up!

in reality, he wasn't bad looking, he really did look like morris chestnut, like he claimed... but the principle is, he faked the funk!


I don't even have a moral to my story. I laugh now...2 hours later.. but maaaaan:spinning:
Click to expand...

Wooow. Why would you do something stupid like that? Especially if you're a decent looking guy? You're knocking yourself out the box from the jump because you're a liar. :nono:
 
metro_qt said:
OOOKAAAYYYY...
y'all want bad date stories?
I just went out for coffee with a guy i met off a dating site.
*HE POSTED A TOTALLY DIFFERENT GUY'S PICTURE UP* :wallbash:

then told me so as he was coming to pick me up for coffee tonight,
and had the nerve to catch attitude, telling me how he thinks he looks good, and i didn't have to be there if i didn't want to, etc, cuz of the vibes i was giving him. (yes. conversation was awkward... many many silences)

Damn straight i'm giving him evilness vibes, he had someone else's picture up!

in reality, he wasn't bad looking, he really did look like morris chestnut, like he claimed... but the principle is, he faked the funk!


I don't even have a moral to my story. I laugh now...2 hours later.. but maaaaan:spinning:
Click to expand...

Did he explain to you why he did that? Was it for privacy? Maybe he is hiding something....
 
chinadoll said:
Yep that's me. It's true, I never been kissed, had a date, had sex, etc. I feel so left behind. Thanks for the compliment, Your very beautiful as well. :heart2:
Click to expand...
I think there's alot of this going on because I'm 22 and I've never had a boyfriend either and I have encountered a few girls that are in the same boat. There's nothing wrong with these ladies either, the ones I know have alot going for themselves pretty, smart, ect., (including me lol). I try not to get too discouraged by my current situation, even though some people can make it difficult. For example relatives constantly asking at every family event "Do you have a boyfriend yet," lol I try my best not to let these comments bring me down.....:-)
 
BrownEyez22 said:
I think there's alot of this going on because I'm 22 and I've never had a boyfriend either and I have encountered a few girls that are in the same boat. There's nothing wrong with these ladies either, the ones I know have alot going for themselves pretty, smart, ect., (including me lol). I try not to get too discouraged by my current situation, even though some people can make it difficult. For example relatives constantly asking at every family event "Do you have a boyfriend yet," lol I try my best not to let these comments bring me down.....:-)
Click to expand...

Yeah, it's more common nowadays to be 20+ and still no man. It sucks because guys don't know how to date anymore. It seems like we have to ask them out instead of the other way around. I can't stand to be around relatives because of that same ol stupid question.
 
chinadoll said:
Yep that's me. It's true, I never been kissed, had a date, had sex, etc. I feel so left behind. Thanks for the compliment, Your very beautiful as well. :heart2:
Click to expand...

You aint missing nothing...dont feel left behind. Youll eventually find that Mr Right or Mr Right Now soon enough just dont lower your standards and stand by your choices :yep:
 
Checking in...I've been moving quite a bit recently, and it's negatively affected my past three relationships, so I'm trying to get my life together and be quasi-settled before taking that leap again. I don't mind my singleness (I'm pretty independent), but I miss having a man sometimes...
 
MzLady78 said:
Aww, thanks Bre!

I mean, guys approach me, but not the type of guys I would give the time of day to. You know how it is.

I think that's why I have all these exes in my life. At least I know what I'm dealing with.:rolleyes:
Click to expand...


Ha! That's me right thurrr.
Yup sexy and single. :yep:
I also feel a love/hate thing with being single. i sometimes want the companionship but love that i don't have to explain myself, nor answer to no one.
 
Checking in...

I've been single for about two years now but I was actively dating/talking to different guys none of them did it for me hence thats why I stayed single. Now that I've graduated from school i think I am ready to commit again when I was in a relationship in school it took a major toll on my academic life. I think all I need is the right location to find Mr Right instead of the Mr RightNow's. I know a few of you ladies are comfortable with online dating but its not my cup of tea.. so any suggestions as to where the Mr Rights are...

off topic but have you ladies been watching Hell Date?? the guys who have been coming on are kinda handsome... where are they at in the real world...

Final consensus I am content with my single life but I wouldnt mind a change though i'm 21 yrs young so i do have time but not that much time..
 
peacensoul said:
Checking in...

I've been single for about two years now but I was actively dating/talking to different guys none of them did it for me hence thats why I stayed single. Now that I've graduated from school i think I am ready to commit again when I was in a relationship in school it took a major toll on my academic life. I think all I need is the right location to find Mr Right instead of the Mr RightNow's. I know a few of you ladies are comfortable with online dating but its not my cup of tea.. so any suggestions as to where the Mr Rights are...

off topic but have you ladies been watching Hell Date?? the guys who have been coming on are kinda handsome... where are they at in the real world...

Final consensus I am content with my single life but I wouldnt mind a change though i'm 21 yrs young so i do have time but not that much time..
Click to expand...

I believe they are all actors in LA. An acquaintance was on the show, but was the "dater" and he's an actor.

Ladies, since I have no dates, I've been doing a lot of reading. First I read "He's Just Not That Into You"....and I should have read it a long time ago!

Now I'm working on "Better Single Than Sorry" which is an excellent book so far. Basically its a book to read when all your friends are married and boo'd up and you're feeling sorry for yourself or like you'll end up an old maid, which is how I've been feeling sometimes. This book is very encouraging and positive.
 
Determined22 said:
I believe they are all actors in LA. An acquaintance was on the show, but was the "dater" and he's an actor.

Ladies, since I have no dates, I've been doing a lot of reading. First I read "He's Just Not That Into You"....and I should have read it a long time ago!

Now I'm working on "Better Single Than Sorry" which is an excellent book so far. Basically its a book to read when all your friends are married and boo'd up and you're feeling sorry for yourself or like you'll end up an old maid, which is how I've been feeling sometimes. This book is very encouraging and positive.
Click to expand...

I was just reading that book . I had a guy dissappear on me this week and i am not happy about it. I am one of the ones who had never had a serious boyfriend. It just never seems to happen for me. I try and date never really seem to get any where. It is hard because i think i am a good catch, i am pretty smart good person, but i just never seem to get anywhere. I feel like a BIG LOSER. My longest relationship was 6 months.... It is very frustrating because i see my friends "knock it out of the park" with the first guy they meet and i seem to keep hitting foul balls:wallbash::wallbash::wallbash:. I kinda feel like i am destined to be single and i am only 23....
 
buttaflye03 said:
Ha! That's me right thurrr.
Yup sexy and single. :yep:
I also feel a love/hate thing with being single. i sometimes want the companionship but love that i don't have to explain myself, nor answer to no one.
Click to expand...

For real!

Granted they're exes for a reason, but at least they genuinely care about me, respect me and don't play games.

I love the whole not having to answer to anyone thing. I do what I want, go where I want with whoever I want.

But I hate not having anyone waiting for me after I come from doing whatever I want, LOL.
 
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