Taking His Last Name...

I was more 'used' to maiden my name than 'attached' to it. My identity goes far beyond just my name.

I changed everything over to his last name not long after we got married, maybe a week or so after getting home from honeymoon. It was so dang simple and not hard at all. They even have online services now that will do it for you. Everyone hyped it up like,"Oh Gaaawwwddd you're gonna have to go thru this and this etc." But when I actually sat down and looked at what was involved, I was like, dafuq were they talking about? It may take a while for certain entities to make the switch, but it's not a huge deal as some were making it seem.

I personally feel like even if it took 10 months or whatever, its ONE, ten-month period of my ENTIRE life. Who gives a **** about ten months in the grand scheme of things.
 
tapioca_pudding said:
I was more 'used' to maiden my name than 'attached' to it. My identity goes far beyond just my name.

I changed everything over to his last name not long after we got married, maybe a week or so after getting home from honeymoon. It was so dang simple and not hard at all. They even have online services now that will do it for you. Everyone hyped it up like,"Oh Gaaawwwddd you're gonna have to go thru this and this etc." But when I actually sat down and looked at what was involved, I was like, dafuq were they talking about? It may take a while for certain entities to make the switch, but it's not a huge deal as some were making it seem.

I personally feel like even if it took 10 months or whatever, its ONE, ten-month period of my ENTIRE life. Who gives a **** about ten months in the grand scheme of things.
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:rolleyes: Speak for yourself. Knew it was a matter of time before a woman came in bashing other women for their choices that they AND their husbands are completely comfortable with. So typical.
 
I took his last name. I was not stuck on keeping my maiden name. I believe that there is energy in names and looking at it from a numerology stand point, the change makes sense in regard to my life. Regardless of what you change your name to, I do believe the name you were born with (energy wise) stays connected regardless. I got confirmation of that bc now I see my maiden name everywhere and I did not before.
 
secretdiamond said:
:rolleyes: Speak for yourself. Knew it was a matter of time before a woman came in bashing other women for their choices that they AND their husbands are completely comfortable with. So typical.
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Um, I was speaking for myself, hence me saying 'personally'.

Just like you gave your experience and your reason behind it, I gave mine. And just like you're comfortable with how you went about things, I am as well. So because my opinion/decision was different than yours, I'm "bashing"? Jeez.

If you read more into my post than what was there, then that is beyond me.
 
tapioca_pudding said:
I was more 'used' to maiden my name than 'attached' to it. My identity goes far beyond just my name.

I changed everything over to his last name not long after we got married, maybe a week or so after getting home from honeymoon. It was so dang simple and not hard at all. They even have online services now that will do it for you. Everyone hyped it up like,"Oh Gaaawwwddd you're gonna have to go thru this and this etc." But when I actually sat down and looked at what was involved, I was like, dafuq were they talking about? It may take a while for certain entities to make the switch, but it's not a huge deal as some were making it seem.

I personally feel like even if it took 10 months or whatever, its ONE, ten-month period of my ENTIRE life. Who gives a **** about ten months in the grand scheme of things.
Click to expand...

Wait you changed it on every account that easily? I thought you'd still need to contact the bank, HR, get a new license, etc.

Or was that form just the part for the legal name change and new SS card? So maybe that part is simpler now but it's gotta be a headache notifying everyone.

I'd get annoyed at filling out the maiden name box on forms for the rest of my life :/

ETA: 10 months is a pregnancy. At least there's a child at the end of that...
 
prettyinpurple said:
Wait you changed it on every account that easily? I thought you'd still need to contact the bank, HR, get a new license, etc.

Or was that form just the part for the legal name change and new SS card? So maybe that part is simpler now but it's gotta be a headache notifying everyone.

ETA: 10 months is a pregnancy. At least there's a child at the end of that...

I'd get annoyed at filling out the maiden name box on forms for the rest of my life :/
Click to expand...

It is easy now I believe. Well it was easy for me. I was in and out of the Social Security Office in less than 10 minutes. My new card came two weeks later, drivers license was easy, getting the bank to change was easy ( you just have to show proof), getting cc changed easy. I kind of update it as I go now bc there are the little things you forget to update. HR was simple. Overall they pretty much want your new ID, SS Card, marriage certificate . When I updated my car insurance and cc I did not need any proof. The only thing I did not like was that I was charged for the transfer in title for car. I was only changing my name but it is considered a transfer.
 
DH didn't care but I took his. Hyphenating my name and his would have been a mouthful so I dropped mine. Needless to say, my father wasn't pleased.
 
I did not change my last name, we planned not to have children, so no need for me to change my name. I use my husband's last name on social media.
 
I went with his since my Spanish last name would be hassley to pronounce in French. DH didn't tell me his expectations, but he was so very pleased when I went with his.

I did change it in the US, I didn't really have to since I don't live there anymore really, but it would've been too confusing to have his name in France and my own in the states (not to mention suspicious??). My passport still bears my maiden name though as I never have to time to change it, I need it to travel back! :lol: It hasn't caused any problems yet.
 
SlimPickinz said:
I plan on taking my husband's name. I'm not tied to my father's name. He wasn't a major part of my life. I'd probably feel differently if I had my momma's name.
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This. Taking it a step further, I have bad memories of my dad along with him not really being in my life, so I was more than ready to get rid of it. Once I got married, my dad had the nerve to email me saying I'd "always be a X", with X being his last name. :rolleyes:
 
I wanted to hyphenate. Now I don't think I care.

I like my middle name. I'm not adding jack to it.
 
DH is very traditional and it meant a lot to him that we both have the same name so I took his. I still think of myself as my maiden name, not sure how many years it will take for my brain to make the switch. Maybe once we have kids and I'm called Mrs. Married Name by their little friends on a regular basis. :lachen:

I was thinking that if we have a son we could use my maiden name as his middle name.
 
Oh, and these days it's easier to change your name but it's still annoying. Social Security, DMV, the bank. Such a hassle doing all of that.

Oh, and an interesting little tidbit. When I went to Social Security to get my name changed I found out that the maximum amount of name changes you are allowed is 10. Who in the world is changing their name 10 times? :lachen:
 
And in NY you gotta take out a newspaper ad. Or at least you used tp

I knew of a couple where BOTH changed their names to the hyphenated version, with the woman's last....
 
I kept my name as is because I love it :love: It's a very Haitian name and I love that about it. Not changing it doesn't make me feel less married and I view it as a very antiquated tradition - nice if you want to keep things traditional but totally not necessary.

Socially, people call me Mrs. DH's Last Name and that's also fine with me.

Maybe I'll add his name to mine when we have kids (seems to make it easier for school pick ups ) but professionally I'll always be Dr. Maiden Name
 
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If your husband or future husband cares then by all means do it. A friend who was getting married didn't plan to change her name but her extra sensitive husband-to-be really wanted her to change it. After the wedding, we tricked her at work and changed her display name but not her actual login wanting to hear her scream. We had every intention of changing it back but before we could do it, she sent him an email without knowing that he would see the display and he fell in love all over again. She pretended to want to kill us but he was really overwhelmed that she would change her name to his. It's a small thing and unless you are in a business where name recognition is the name of the game I'd just do it.
 
FH second name is Chan lol. He's not making a big deal about it, but only him, or his (eternal playboy type) brother can pass the name down.

Not sure how I feel about people thinking I'm Chinese before I meet them though:look:. Seems like awkward situations may ensue.

It sounds better and sexier than my current name combination though.
 
Kept my maiden name. Dr. X at work and Mrs. Y socially. We were both over 35 when we got married and both established in our careers so DH understood. The funny thing was my mom was adamant about me keeping my maiden name and she's been married to my dad for almost 50 years. Now if I met DH before or during grad school I would have taken his name.
 
I plan on taking his last name and making mine my middle name since I don't have a middle name. To ME personally, it's a small way for me to honor him. Changing your name is a very personal decision. You've gotta do what's best for you.
 
I don't plan on changing my last name. I really love my name. Even though i'm not close with my father and he never was really in my life, that has nothing to do with how i like my name, and how its tied to my sense of identity!
 
I've been married for five years and I changed my name to his right after the honeymoon, but I still forget that it's my last name at times. I was filling out a form about a month ago, and I wrote my maiden name.

I'm not super close to DH's family, so I think that's a part of the reason why I'm not so hype about my last name.
 
A lot of people know me and my family. Hyphenating my last name allowed me to maintain my past identity while legally adopting DH's surname too. I am also very close to my father. He will always have a special place in my heart no matter how crazy he is lol. Because of this, I kept my maiden name.
 
When I marry I will do it or hyphenate while including his at the end but no matter what, his name will be a part of my new life. I may hyphenate only for work purposes but it depends. My name change would be to his no matter what legally. I see nothing wrong with this tradition. It makes things easy as you have the same last name as your husband and kids. Nor am I interested in him changing his name to mine and the kids going with mine to prove a point. I'm not interested in ripping off his balls and putting them in my purse just because I can...nor do I plan to completely emasculate him in other ways :giggle:. I realize that people have a ton of reasons for keeping their name but I also know some do it to make a statement.

If someone else thinks it is important more power to them. For me I think that it is romantic, sweet, and traditional. I can still be an independent capable woman while having my future husband's last name. Also, I am not the only one to carry on the family name so there is no reason for an exception in that way. There are plenty of men in my family doing that and they are married with tons of kids to continue to carry on the name.
 
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tapioca_pudding said:
I was more 'used' to maiden my name than 'attached' to it. My identity goes far beyond just my name.

I changed everything over to his last name not long after we got married, maybe a week or so after getting home from honeymoon. It was so dang simple and not hard at all. They even have online services now that will do it for you. Everyone hyped it up like,"Oh Gaaawwwddd you're gonna have to go thru this and this etc." But when I actually sat down and looked at what was involved, I was like, dafuq were they talking about? It may take a while for certain entities to make the switch, but it's not a huge deal as some were making it seem.

I personally feel like even if it took 10 months or whatever, its ONE, ten-month period of my ENTIRE life. Who gives a **** about ten months in the grand scheme of things.
Click to expand...


It actually can be that hard for women who are in professions like a medical doctor. Much more involved than the day to day changing. And like someone said before degrees, licensing, medical specialty boards, ETC.... It is NOT that simple.
 
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