*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

This muthasuka had the nerve to tell me I need to do more squats.

My head spun 180 degrees. Sir, I am fitter than you, now and evermore. This thang is sitting right and no matter how many squats I do, this jiggle ain't going nowhere because I like it!

Now how about you do more crunches and stop eating rice and bread.

Why do men feel so comfortable making comments about my body? They think because I'm fit that that's it's ok to say? I make it clear that their opinion doesn't matter and ask them if it's ok to talk about their hairline/waistline/****hardness!

They always want to tell me what had gotten bigger or smaller and it drives me insane. Keep that ish yourself!!!!!!!
 
quirkydimples said:
Things are still going well with #2. Conversation is still good. He's still consistently spending. The coloring is quite nice. I continue to let him do the majority of the talking as I evaluate words and actions.

Did I mention that I did a background check on him a few weeks ago? I can't remember. Well...yeah...I did that. :look:
Click to expand...
how do you do a background check?
 
Dposh167 said:
I never meet men randomly in stores...let alone michaels :oops:. What am i doing wrong lol
Click to expand...
I meet men everywhere but I also live in NYC. I don't take it as a compliment :lol: I have also been wearing my glasses and I get hit on 10x more when I'm wearing glasses than contacts.

Edit: well I see you live in the city as well. idk men just bother me all the time. i only take it as a compliment if the guy is fine & tall.
 
Last edited:
My friends just told me that #2 sounds nice but they don't want me to settle for "nice." There needs to be a strong spark, they say. There was one dissenting opinion that said the spark fades and you need to be more practical. Who knows where this will end up long term, but what say you ladies: strong spark (excitement) or practical (predictability/security)?

As someone who's been married before, I have my own opinion, but I'm curious about yours.
 
quirkydimples said:
My friends just told me that #2 sounds nice but they don't want me to settle for "nice." There needs to be a strong spark, they say. There was one dissenting opinion that said the spark fades and you need to be more practical. Who knows where this will end up long term, but what say you ladies: strong spark (excitement) or practical (predictability/security)?

As someone who's been married before, I have my own opinion, but I'm curious about yours.
Click to expand...
I would say spark with a bit of predictability. Does that even exist? It's nice to have that spark but when you don't get excited anymore where does that leave you. I'd like to know that I can tolerate the person once the excitement wears off.
 
In other news...dude cancelled!!!! :lachen::lachen::lachen: OK so this time is a little different. He text me early this morning saying he's bright eyed and busy tailed so early on a Saturday and he hopes the start of my weekend is going well. Then maybe an hour or 2 later he text saying he just found out he's getting called into work and it shouldn't take long but he wanted to let me know early on. I didn't respond. He continues saying he doesn't want me to think he's a flake so maybe let's not play it by ear and set something in stone for during the week. What say you ladies? Should I respond? What is this? Do people want to date or just text and chat forever?
 
KammyGirl said:
In other news...dude cancelled!!!! :lachen::lachen::lachen: OK so this time is a little different. He text me early this morning saying he's bright eyed and busy tailed so early on a Saturday and he hopes the start of my weekend is going well. Then maybe an hour or 2 later he text saying he just found out he's getting called into work and it shouldn't take long but he wanted to let me know early on. I didn't respond. He continues saying he doesn't want me to think he's a flake so maybe let's not play it by ear and set something in stone for during the week. What say you ladies? Should I respond? What is this? Do people want to date or just text and chat forever?
Click to expand...
He didn't call to cancel? He text a cancellation? :look:
 
He did call but I wasn't awake yet. It was super early but I'm not sure he called to cancel anyway. That was probably just to chat because he called at 8:48 and the first text about being bright eyed and bushy tailed was immediately after. Then the other texts came a short while later like 9:00 - 9:15. I thought the texts were farther apart for some reason. Don't know what I was looking at. No responses to any of them because I got up around 9:30.

I'm not that bothered by the texting because I'm a big texter and hate talking on the phone. He's aware. I'm bothered by the cancellation altogether like really? You're not a doctor and you don't work in retail. How are you getting called into work last minute like this? I feel like it's an excuse. The only somewhat redeeming thing about this is the last text which said "Do you want to try for later in the week?" At least it was a follow up instead of just a not gonna make it type thing. I don't even know that I care to respond though.

Eta: Yeah I just looked again and initially thought the first text was at 6am. Lol There's a crack in my screen and it's definitely an 8. Not that it matters though. :lol:
 
Last edited:
My mom's friend knows a man she thinks I should meet and this time even my dad is wanting me to meet him because he's a NBA fan or maybe because he found out I kissed the Mexican groomsman at my friend's wedding. Whatever. I hate being set up, because the people who offer are usually people who don't know me very well. Anyway he's black, owns his own home, works for Nike, from my parents home state and is graduate educated. He's super tall too. Like 6'7. I'm only 5'3. I saw a picture of him, not what I usually go for but he's not ugly either. Downside is he lives in another state. I don't know how this would work if something did happen. Anyway I told my mom to find out more, like make sure there are no babymamas and such. Presuming she gets the all clear, I'll meet him as soon as the friend gets him to town.
 
Ugh, get out my inbox with your Becky loving and breeding self.

My ex BF (from when I was 15) had like 4 kids with this white chick (one died from SIDS). She passed away in 2015, this dude already got a baby with some new white chick.

He's so gross to me. I unfollowed him but last night he sent me a PM like "what's up, T." Negro, there is nothing we need to talk about in private.
 
Last edited:
So this guy text again last night to ask me how my day went and mentioned "you didn't respond to my earlier texts". He continued to text saying he never ever works on the weekend, he hopes I'm not mad and that he can take me to dinner. I'm still on the fence. I may be being unreasonable since he's running a new business and things come up but I'm extra sensitive to this last minute cancelling. It's a top 5 pet peeve of mine. And even with good reason it will earn the person quite a while of silent treatment - this includes platonic relationships and family. I won't ignore him but I'm also not making a huge effort on this unless I get the feeling it will be worth it.
 
@KammyGirl
I believe that the fact that he continues to text and not call is a red flag. I know you said you aren't a big phone person but that only works if you see the person regularly. You get to know a person by phone and in person. Texting is not a good substitution. So him just texting and texting IMO is passive aggressive. He can say that he really tried and yet he's still not putting in the effort. He's bailed on you twice now. And yet says he doesn't work many weekends, but he was trying to squeeze you in during the week, vs. the weekend, which is curious. Men who avoid seeing you during the weekend are often hiding something.

Try your best to stay focused on you and your needs. Not his new business or him being a hard worker etc. Either he wants to date and have a real relationship or he doesn't.

If you give this guy a chance be careful to really watch and observe his behavior: back to busy on the weekends, last minute cancellations, non-stop texting etc. However you proceed, keep your needs front and center and trust your gut.
 
hopeful said:
@KammyGirl
I believe that the fact that he continues to text and not call is a red flag. I know you said you aren't a big phone person but that only works if you see the person regularly. You get to know a person by phone and in person. Texting is not a good substitution. So him just texting and texting IMO is passive aggressive. He can say that he really tried and yet he's still not putting in the effort. He's bailed on you twice now. And yet says he doesn't work many weekends, but he was trying to squeeze you in during the week, vs. the weekend, which is curious. Men who avoid seeing you during the weekend are often hiding something.

Try your best to stay focused on you and your needs. Not his new business or him being a hard worker etc. Either he wants to date and have a real relationship or he doesn't.

If you give this guy a chance be careful to really watch and observe his behavior: back to busy on the weekends, last minute cancellations, non-stop texting etc. However you proceed, keep your needs front and center and trust your gut.
Click to expand...

He hasn't bailed twice. This is a new guy. This weekend was the first time we were supposed to go out. The other guy that I mentioned cancelling last minute didn't ask to reschedule and he was blocked almost immediately.

And idk I'm really really not bothered by texting at all. I hate talking on the phone. As long as like you said we see each other I don't mind it. There is only 1 ex I know that liked to talk on the phone and he did most of the talking. I'm that person that people hate because I will text you all day and night but hardly answer a phone call. I just prefer it especially because as soon as a silence comes along I'm like alright lemme let you go. :lol: Unless there's something super super important going on I'm good.
 
KammyGirl said:
He hasn't bailed twice. This is a new guy. This weekend was the first time we were supposed to go out. The other guy that I mentioned cancelling last minute didn't ask to reschedule and he was blocked almost immediately.

And idk I'm really really not bothered by texting at all. I hate talking on the phone. As long as like you said we see each other I don't mind it. There is only 1 ex I know that liked to talk on the phone and he did most of the talking. I'm that person that people hate because I will text you all day and night but hardly answer a phone call. I just prefer it especially because as soon as a silence comes along I'm like alright lemme let you go. :lol: Unless there's something super super important going on I'm good.
Click to expand...

Oh ok my bad. Well good luck then. Hopefully you guys get together soon.
 
Feeling really optimistic. We talk every single day several times a day. Usually I'm not a talker AT ALL. We have been on the phone literally for hours...and it seems like a few quick minutes. I think I'm self consciously trying to test him by telling him all my dirty details seeing if he will run for the hills. Not even close.

I really like him though so we shall see. He's told me he doesn't want to see anyone but me and hopes I will do the same. He's even told his daughter about me. Normally all this stuff would creep me out and seem like wayyyy too much, but this feels good. It's crazy but that's life ain't it.....:yay::yay::yay:
 
Last edited:
Went out Thursday and Saturday night, drank for free all evening, got a few numbers. Not interested in getting to know any of them. I'll at least go on a date with those who follow up though.

This man has his hooks in me deep. But he's a wanderer at heart. So am I, but when it comes to love, I've never been able to care for more than one man at a time.
 
Exactly 1 month in and he wants a relationship. He said he's not trying to rush anything but, at the same time it doesn't take long to figure out whether or not you want to be with someone. I asked him what being in a relationship meant to him and why he wanted a relationship with me... he gave really good answers too.

I told him in due time. :look:
 
All4Tris said:
Exactly 1 month in and he wants a relationship. He said he's not trying to rush anything but, at the same time it doesn't take long to figure out whether or not you want to be with someone. I asked him what being in a relationship meant to him and why he wanted a relationship with me... he gave really good answers too.

I told him in due time. :look:
Click to expand...

I truly believe the bolded, I'm always amazed at people being together for years but still not sure if they want a relationship with each other or not.
 
KammyGirl said:
I would say spark with a bit of predictability. Does that even exist? It's nice to have that spark but when you don't get excited anymore where does that leave you. I'd like to know that I can tolerate the person once the excitement wears off.
Click to expand...
We have a spark. I think what's different is that he's corny...lol. If I'm the "cool" one in the relationship...whoa. But, judging by the way he interacts with his family and daughters, he's dependable and very family-oriented, and spends his money freely on loved ones. That's important to me.

He consistently makes time for me and so far has done anything I ask him to do. We've gotten our kids together multiple times now (my 1 and his 2) and everyone gets along well. My plan was not to introduce anyone to my kid, but he said him and his kids are a package deal as he assumes me and mine are, so might as well figure out if it all clicks now rather than later. I never looked at it that way, but it makes sense.
 
I randomly met a guy while out celebrating completion of a tough exam on Friday. Of course he doesn't live in my city lol. Anyway I was minding my merry black business, living my life like it's golden (a la Evelyn from the Internets lol) having a time with my girls from school. He tapped me on my shoulder and told me that he loved my hair and my "vibe." He's shorter than my usual type hehe, maybe 5'10 but he had a beautiful smile, perfect teeth and a low beard. We danced together for the rest of the night and he kissed me before he left. I left town the next day but we've been texting... I'm admittedly not very interested, mainly due to the distance, but attention is always nice.
 
I'm at a conference for work in Baltimore with my white guy coworker. He's cool af and we the same age. We're having a fantastic time :lol: all of these conference events have open bars and I'm so got damn horny and he is too lmao if I wasn't attached. BIH WHAT?! :lachen: We're in Baltimore, down here near the convention center (Baltimore st) so black guys have been saying things to him about "being with me", while we're walking around outside :lachen: niccas. Gotta love em :lol:

Im drunk rn btw. My parents bout to meet me at my hotel for dinner. Yay!
 
qchelle said:
I'm at a conference for work in Baltimore with my white guy coworker. He's cool af and we the same age. We're having a fantastic time :lol: all of these conference events have open bars and I'm so got damn horny and he is too lmao if I wasn't attached. BIH WHAT?! :lachen: We're in Baltimore, down here near the convention center (Baltimore st) so black guys have been saying things to him about "being with me", while we're walking around outside :lachen: niccas. Gotta love em :lol:

Im drunk rn btw. My parents bout to meet me at my hotel for dinner. Yay!
Click to expand...
You in my neck of the woods!!!!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Hairsnob
FB Read: My Thoughts on How a Man Chooses a Woman to Settle Down With
Replies
18
Views
1K
Hairsnob
Hairsnob
misskris816
Never thought I'd be one of those girls...
2
Replies
51
Views
2K
misskris816
misskris816
Tene
Great Hair Tips for Damaged Hair and Hair Growth
4 5 6
Replies
171
Views
104K
Ivonnovi
Ivonnovi
Back
Top