Relaxed Forever? Is it Possible?

Is it possible to be relaxed forever and still have hair on your head?

  • Yes!!

    Votes: 112 71.3%
  • No!!

    Votes: 45 28.7%

  • Total voters
    157

Candy_C

New Member
Do you think, if you have relaxed hair, its healthy, strong and growing well..you have no problems at ALL...do u think you could be relaxed till the day you die??

i've been relaxed for nearly 8 years, and i'm thinking about how long i could go being relaxed...

isit best to take a break from relaxers for a few years in between then relax again?
 
thinks about this topic was one of the reasons i stoped relaxing. i was talking to my mom about it. and it just came to me i didnt want to relax forever. i enjoyed my relaxed hair- it was an experience. im happy iv gone back natural now.

i thing i know is relaxing for soo long has changed the texture of my hair- it was Never like this before. as a child my hair was lonnggg and as thick and a bush. not is Much softer! it like over the 10 years the relaxer loosened the the curl pattern.

i think giving the hair a break is a very good idea. you can always relax when you feel your hairs ready again or still, stay natural if you feel to do that.
 
i'll look at this using my mom for example... she's been relaxed all of my life and for years before that, so that's at least 30 years, and as much as i tempt her, she has no plans to stop anytime soon...

her hair is healthy and beautiful... the only problems she has are scalp problems and skin problems in general run in my family so that's no big surprise... she cuts her hair every so often when she feels it's gotten too long (she likes to keep it right at shoulder length)...

to her credit though, she doesn't use much heat... she's faithfully at the hairdresser every 2 weeks and gets a roller set every time... touchups every 6 weeks (although she could definitely go longer)... she does not use heat between her visits (can't use a curling iron to save her life, and has no need for a blow dryer because she doesn't wash her own hair)... so my thought is yes, you can relax forever if you're low maintenance with your hair...
 
Probably not. Every time I hit 12 weeks I start playing in the newgrowth and thinking about transitioning. One day the urge will be too strong and that will be all she wrote.
Especially since self-relaxing is a pain, even though I do it at most 4x a year.

eta: I guess I misread. Yes I think it is possible to relax for decades and still have hair.
 
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I don't ever want another relaxer in my hair, I'm glad I went natural. I just couldn't see myself relaxing the rest of my life.
 
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Tene said:
I don't ever want another relaxer in my hair, I'm glad I went natural. I just couldn't see myself relaxing the rest of my life.
Same here...

I believe a woman can relax her hair until she dies but not have as much hair on her head than before...
but that could go for naturals as well as they age....thinning and hair loss are caused by more factors than just relaxers.
 
Candy_C said:
is it best to take a break from relaxers for a few years in between then relax again?
I have an aunt who does this. She's in her late 30's/early 40's. She relaxes her hair every 4 years. Her hair is thick and brastrap length.
 
yes, I have a aunt who grew her hair to WL. she get her hair relaxes 2x a year. she goes to the salon every other week and at home she only wears her hair in a bun. she has been bunning it up for 20+ years and she use no heat in her hair. last summer she cut her hair like 2 inches above BSL she didn't like all that hair.


ETA: she is 60 something years old.
 
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If you are going to wear your hair relaxed, I don't see any reason why you should take a break. What for? You are going to end up putting chemicals on it any way. Why torture yourself?
 
Well my maternal grandmother still relaxes, and she is in her late seventies. Her 4a hair is about armpit length (and only because she has it trimmed regularly at the salon) and it is naturally fine, like mine. It appears to be as thick as its always been, but I could be wrong. Either way, no significant thinning or balding spots, and it appears very healthy.

But personally, I dont expect to relax forever. THere's just something to be said about being completely "free" once I reach that point (senior citizenship) in my life. While I am enjoying my relaxed hair now, I do look forward to that time in the future when i stop relaxing.
 
My Mom has long, gorgeous waist length relaxed hair. It IS possible to have healthy relaxed hair. She rollerset it most of the time and bunned it the rest. Before my first BC I had below shoulder length healthy relaxed hair. It all boils down to the way u care for it.
 
My mom is in her late 50's, and she's still relaxed. The relaxer doesn't take the same way because she has a lot of gray, but it's still thick.

I don't plan to relax forever, but knowing what I now know about hair care, I'm sure I could if I wanted too.
 
No, I'm not going to relax forever.

My mom alternated between natural and relaxed hair until she went natural near 50. My mom wore so many styles over the years (except the jheri curl). I like looking through her photo albums.

Now she's wearing locs. I'm learning how to maintain her hair. And after I achieve my hair goals and favorite styles with relaxed hair, I'll go natural too.
 
I don't think I will relax forever. My mom for example has been relaxed most of her life. She stated that she was going to back to natural when she retires in 7 months and move back to Mississippi. She can't stand long hair and keeps it short and it's healthy. She will have no problems transitioning.
 
DDtexlaxd said:
My Mom has long, gorgeous waist length relaxed hair. It IS possible to have healthy relaxed hair. She rollerset it most of the time and bunned it the rest. Before my first BC I had below shoulder length healthy relaxed hair. It all boils down to the way u care for it.

Now ITA with the bold part.... Maybe if I had learned about hair care techniques to this extent with my relaxed hair, I might have had a better relaxed hair life.... I'm just done with it at this point. Now in terms of relaxed hair being "healthy", esp. IN COMPARISON to unprocessed hair, not wholly convinced about that.... So maybe healthy is relative, in this instance.
 
It is possible to still relax later in life and still have long hair. Issues like thinning, etc...would mainly be genetic. In my family I've noticed that as the women age they naturally lose a lot of their curl pattern until their hair goes pretty much straight anyways. I am not going to be relaxed forever.
 
redRiot said:
It is possible to still relax later in life and still have long hair. Issues like thinning, etc...would mainly be genetic. In my family I've noticed that as the women age they naturally lose a lot of their curl pattern until their hair goes pretty much straight anyways. I am not going to be relaxed forever.

That happened to my mom too. I used to do comb coils with a little gel in her hair sometimes (she has shoulder length hair when stretched).

One day I started doing a coil, and it flopped. My mom told me to put more gel, but that didn't help. I tried a different section, and the same thing happened. I wound up doing regular twists. She decided to start locs soon after that.
 
I think we (30's and under) are the first generation to relax our hair pre-pubescent ages on...

When Garrett Morgan "invented" the hair relaxer in the early 1900's it still took over 40 years for a good majority of black people to start using it on their scalps--er--hair. And I personally don't know anyone over the age of 40 who has had a relaxer more than 20-15 years, most not even that young. I know we grew up being a "pressing" family. Heck, I was the first one to get a relaxer, BEFORE my mom. So only time will tell. Hair naturally thins as you get old anyway. If you want to sit at the hair dresser every two weeks for hours on end at the age of 70 that on you. :lol:

I'd shave my head before I'd do that. Heck, I'm 29 and I haven't had the desire to go to the salon since I was 22 and I hated it then too. Haven't been to one since 2002. And I did my own relaxers then too. :lol:
 
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Technology is changing so rapidly, we won't even be using the word "relaxer" in a few years anyway. Besides the choice of natural hair (which we will alway have), I believe we would have something else, which could even be a natural way to relax our hair. I don't think relaxing with chemicals forever is part of our future.
 
My grandmother is 67 and I relax her hair twice a year and she has beautiful, healthy hair. She has no plans to stop relaxing that I'm aware of and has never had a problem. She rollersets once a week and uses no heat just airdrying so I think it's just all about how you care for your hair relaxed or natural. But me personally I intend on being relaxed for a long time because I like my hair this way and I've found a happy medium since I stretch relaxing every 3 to 4 months.
 
My grandmother is about 75 and she has been relaxed FOR YEARS, and she still has a head full of thick healthy hair. It's not long though, but that's by choice.
 
I have no intentions of going natural. I prefer relaxers and have never thought of relaxing my hair as a temporary styling solution or a hair period.

The thought of being natural for me is just... I don't think that would fit my lifestyle or personal style at all. And I don't believe there's a perfect hair solution out there; if your hair is kinky you can work with its fragility from relaxing it or you can work with its fragility in its natural state. Either way the average 4a/4b black head of hair is going to be some WORK and sacrifice some kind of way.
 
I'm 29 and I have had a relaxer since I was 4 years old. I never had any bad experiences till I turn 18 and tried to relax my own hair. My mother is a hair stylist so I get a lot a good tips from her on keeping my hair on my head and I can now self relax with no problems. I plan on relaxing till I get old since I love the ease of styling relaxed hair vs natural.
 
Tene said:
I don't ever want another relaxer in my hair, I'm glad I went natural. I just couldn't see myself relaxing the rest of my life.

True. :up: I chose "No" because:

For my hair, over time, it began to shed and break. Not becuase I was putting a "bad relaxer" on my hair, the chemicals just kept on piling up :nono:

Now that I'm natural, I never have to worry about the itching and dry scalp. :)
 
It seems that some naturals have had bad experiences with relaxers voted no. Is it because you ladies have had these experiences the reason why U went natural? Just for my own info. Hope I'm not being 2 nosey.:lol:
 
Cichelle said:
I'm sure you could. The question is, do you want to?


definately ONE day! maybe in my 20's...

i see how pretty everyones natural hair is and definately want to embrace it again. but i think i will be an on and off relaxer as i love my relaxed texture!
 
DDtexlaxd said:
It seems that some naturals have had bad experiences with relaxers voted no. Is it because you ladies have had these experiences the reason why U went natural? Just for my own info. Hope I'm not being 2 nosey.:lol:

I'll share.... My mother is a hairdresser.... I sorta felt like a guinea pig growing up...because as the new fangled products and techniques would come out, some of them would get practiced on me (a la jheri curl!). I never had a major hair fall-out. Getting my hair done was such a chore. It wasn't fun.

When I started getting my hair done at beauty shops, I tried to be consistent with a stylist, but then something would happen to part that relationship. It wasn't until about 4-5 years ago when I finally found a wonderful stylist and my hair BLOSSOMED under her care. It did things I thought it never could (bounce, etc.) I never wanted it super long (like bra strap) but a nice length so I could wear decent updos.... It never got that long, though.... About a year ago, I had been talking to her about going natural. She encouraged me and started me on my transition (I started getting my hair pressed), then she moved out of state kinda unexpectedly, and from then on, I've been on my own (she spoiled me from other hairdressers!).

Like I've shared before, if I had known about LCHF and many of the techniques (like stretching) and other tips to care for my hair, I might have tried to keep relaxing. But on top of all else, I got tired of being dependent on the chemicals (and the "extra" hair!), I got tired of the time and money spent in the salon. I got tired of trying to chase a look that took too much of my time and my self-esteem because my hair seemed inadequate.... It's like if shoulder-length hair is an A+, I could only get B- because my hair only got far as my neck. (I'm in school studying education, so I have grades on the brain!) I must achieve straight As!

Hope this provides some understanding.
 
Not to mention that I see women of all races still dying and perming their hair at an older age. When I'd walk past chain salons I'd see women well into their 60s and 70s having their hair curly permed. It's all about how you prefer your hair and how you take care of it. Because hair growth slows as we age, a woman in her 60s and older would only need a touchup once or twice a year to maintain straight hair.
 
It's possible to relax to the grave, but I won't be doing it. :nono: Shoot, I'm 21, and I'm conflicted about doing it now! I already know my relaxed days are numbered. . .
 
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