***Online Dating Support Thread***

Enyo said:
For ladies who are not photogenic, what is your experience like? Mine has been horrible. If I heard, "Wow you're much prettier in person!" one more time... And that's if they guy even writes me back after seeing my pic. :(
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Hi Enyo,

What do you think looks off in your current photos?

Bad lighting, clothing, not smiling, smiling too much, face shiny…..all of these things are fixable.

Ask a friend (or just someone you trust) to take the photos.

You have control over the photos you post (unlike your driver license photo) ...... so if it takes 50 poses before that one great photo – make an afternoon of it and just DO IT!
 
So I am thinking about putting my "dating" email on my match.com page so I don't have to subscribe. Am I wrong? LOL

ETA: I see they don't let you do that. One step ahead of me they are. :lachen:
 
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I am a magnet for crazy , unstable and sexaholic men:nono: But most of them are professional with $$$$. :lol: So I enjoy the dinners and outings.
 
CurliDiva said:
Hi @Enyo,

What do you think looks off in your current photos? Bad lighting, clothing, not smiling, smiling too much, face shiny…..all of these things are fixable. Ask a friend (or just someone you trust) to take the photos. You have control over the photos you post (unlike your driver license photo) ...... so if it takes 50 poses before that one great photo – make an afternoon of it and just DO IT!
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CurliDiva It's nothing to do with lights or how I'm posing. I actually do photography as a hobby, and I know that some faces just don't photograph as well. If it were a matter of lighting, etc., then that would have been fixed long ago. I have a timer on my DSLR and can take pictures of myself. I've yet to see one in the past two years that I wouldn't mind sharing. :ohwell:

To be clear, I'm actually not actively using online dating, but I have in the past and I wanted to know if other non-photogenic people have dealt with this unfortunate issue.
 
Ladies...be careful out there.

Now the deaf guy decided he's going to come to Houston anyway and proceed to blow my phone up. I know this chile gotta have some inclination that I'm the wrong one for that type of performance.

Dang....I'm trying to feel sorry for him but he is getting on my second to the last nerve.
 
Aye. So I have a 43 year old messaging me. If he wasn't so freaking old! That's really the only thing I have a problem with. My father is 44.
 
Kinda OT but I went speed dating (which i booked online) and all but 2 had amazing jobs;- investment bankers, a lawyer, an architect, couple accountants none however was I attracted to. At the end of the speeding, a developer at Goldman Sachs asked if I would like a drink. We had a drink and talked some more. He took my number and we arranged a date for mon.

Now mon came and we went for dinner. He's a cool guy. Like if we were working together I'd have lunch with him. I felt nothing at all. And I was kinda bored. He wants to see me today but I don't know how to tell him I 'm not interested in pursuing things further with him.

My friend said I should just go on another date with him but i feel like he might go in for a kiss and that scares me lol.
After my dates with the french lawyer I've realised I need chemisty; I need to be sexually attracted to you if not my whole body tenses up when you get close.
So ladies, how do you say ' I'm not interested anymore'.
 
tropical-punch said:
So, if a guy favors you but doesn't message. Would you message back?
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I don't.....
I have been noticing a lot of guys doing that (are you talking about black people meet?) Like they want you to message them, or they don't have a paid profile where they can message you.....What's the point of favoriting someone anyway?
 
cocomochaa I would just nicely tell him there is no chemistry and keep it moving. No sense of going through a production just to say we don't click. Some see the fact of what he does for a living as a reason to hold on to him. I would love to chat with men like that though but in due time.
 
Haha so I sent him a text saying it was great meeting you but didn't feel there was much chemistry blah blah blah. I guess he wanted to have to have the last word because he replied saying "True. Just wanted to say it face-to-face. Have a great life you deserve it."

*rolls eyes*

I can't wait till I meet a man I'm excited about. I can't wait till I have a date, run home, switch on my laptop, and post 'Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh, I dun found him ladies! Thank you Jesus!'
 
This thread was started back in 2010...has anyone had any success. Meaning is anyone in a committed relationship with someone they meet online during this thread?
 
Xavier said:
This thread was started back in 2010...has anyone had any success. Meaning is anyone in a committed relationship with someone they meet online during this thread?
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Xavier Here and present.:grin: I am I am...doing the happy dance. I woke up this morning to scrambled eggs with onions with sausage, coffee and well yeah :lick:....later homie fixed my upstairs toilet which like Geico saved me a ton of money...:grin: then I bid him adieu and sent him off to work.

I'm up now waiting on him to get off work so we can write together!

Bliss I tell you ...Bliss.
 
lushcoils said:
Only a few.
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Only a few is still pretty good. Gives me hope. I joined POF this week. I hadn't even posted a pic or written a damn thing and I had messages. Talk about thirsty. Lol . I Finally wrote on my profile and explained that I would not be posting my pics but would be open to immediately sharing them privately via email. So far so good. I hope to have My first date lined up soon.
 
ElizaBlue said:
Xavier Here and present.:grin: I am I am...doing the happy dance. I woke up this morning to scrambled eggs with onions with sausage, coffee and well yeah :lick:....later homie fixed my upstairs toilet which like Geico saved me a ton of money...:grin: then I bid him adieu and sent him off to work.

I'm up now waiting on him to get off work so we can write together!

Bliss I tell you ...Bliss.
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So nice to read things like this. I am so tired of being single. It's time to actively seek and make myself available.
 
Xavier said:
Only a few is still pretty good. Gives me hope. I joined POF this week. I hadn't even posted a pic or written a damn thing and I had messages. Talk about thirsty. Lol . I Finally wrote on my profile and explained that I would not be posting my pics but would be open to immediately sharing them privately via email. So far so good. I hope to have My first date lined up soon.
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Yes I think it's best to combine both online and off line methods, with an emphasis on offline though.
 
lushcoils said:
Yes I think it's best to combine both online and off line methods, with an emphasis on offline though.
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idk that i necessarily agree with this. i meet tons of guys offline, but in my opinion that is much slower going. especially with the kinds of guys im interested in these days, who are not just looking to jump in the bed or to waste anybody's time. i think that with online dating, you have that emphasis on dating from the jump, so that takes out a lot of the immediate guesswork.

the hold up comes when people take a long time to choose someone (are afraid to meet in real life or constantly second guess everything about the guy to an unreasonable extent), or arent good at transitioning from online to offline. but i think if you are adept at dealing with men, thats not a problem at all.

i would actually prefer to meet men online than irl. of course, i would take either, but in a pinch if i were looking to meet someone i would do online/offline on about a 70/30 split, perhaps more. it's just way more efficient in my opinion.
 
I don't think online is necessary more efficient than offline because like you said a lot of time is wasted with the scrolling through profiles, page viewing, messaging, and meeting if that even happens. And then if you meet, you have to see if you have chemistry. If you like their voice, if they are even attractive, if they smell, how they interact wit others...

By focusing on meeting people in real life, I can already determine these things from the start. Yes, online expands your pool, but it terms of numbers/marriage, only 1/5 couples who marry meet their spouse online. Overall, most people aren't on online sites. I keep seeing the same people on okc whenever I sign on. If I focus on meeting people in real life several times a week, I see more new people. So for me personally, it's worth putting the majority of my effort into online. But everyone is different.

My method is striving toward 90% offline, 10% online.
 
I have a date with Mr. Spiritual this evening. He's taking me to see some performing arts show or something.
I am PMSing and I don't really wanna go but hopefully it'll turn out to be fun.

I still don't know what to wear but I do know I wanna feel very girly and feminine.

I'm off to go get a pedicure and get my eyebrows done. I think I'll do a bit of pampering today before my date.
 
why?:nono:

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ElizaBlue said:
@kaynewme Texas..and yes...I have to admit I throw away more of them than I can keep. I just have some really strict "non-negotiables" but there are some really good guys out there. Especially if someone will be willing to take someone with small children.
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I research best states to meet men...Texas was one of them. Scum of the earth reside in the Phildalephia area. LOL. But I'm really gonna try this year. Date multiple people and be more open to meet different guys who aren't usually my type. I'm going to retire the confident ******* of my list of guys and guys with "swag". lol...swag gets tiring
 
Xavier said:
So nice to read things like this. I am so tired of being single. It's time to actively seek and make myself available.
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Xavier Thank you mam. There is at least one, but I would wager more than one out there who will give you most of what you want. We will never have the perfect man...just the perfect man for us. That is what I had to learn.
 
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