***Online Dating Support Thread***

CleopatrasCousin said:
OMG, so I decided to give the online thing a try, just to get back out there (had a recent break up) and lock in a few quick dates-nothing serious. I really feel like a snob right now. First of all, is it customary to misspell everything and type in incomplete sentences now? I know that may sound petty, but I have been over here rolling at some of these messages. (I may have to come back and give you an actual example)

Not to mention, getting the messages that JUST say; "you're beautiful" or "Hi" or "holla back"....ummm no sir.

And, what is up with guys taking photos of themselves where you can clearly see them aiming the phone at the mirror? Am I really the only one who thinks this is hilarious?

I've gotten a lot of messages, but nothing even close to what I'd be interested in. I kinda feel bad, I don't even want to respond to anyone.
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girl, YES. lol :lachen::lachen:
i ignored a poorly written note, only for him to send another that said, "what? you dont likes the way i look?" lol i wanted to say I don't like the way you type.
 
Ignore everything you don't like. You don't want to encourage any fools. Like laCriolla said they will continue to contact you anyway but continue to ignore.
 
I've been dating someone for a little longer than 3 months and we just kissed for the first time weeks ago. (He travels for work, and with the holidays he's been away) Anyway, The kiss was terrible! I went from liking him to absolutely not wanting to speak to him anymore because of it. It was that bad! He's a pretty cool guy, But he doesnt create butterflies in my stomache, and that whack kiss was the icing on the cake. It was just waaaay too juicy and there was no spark...nothing!

I don't know if I should just let him go, or give him another chance when he gets home :ohwell:
 
dollface0023 said:
I've been dating someone for a little longer than 3 months and we just kissed for the first time weeks ago. (He travels for work, and with the holidays he's been away) Anyway, The kiss was terrible! I went from liking him to absolutely not wanting to speak to him anymore because of it. It was that bad! He's a pretty cool guy, But he doesnt create butterflies in my stomache, and that whack kiss was the icing on the cake. It was just waaaay too juicy and there was no spark...nothing!

I don't know if I should just let him go, or give him another chance when he gets home :ohwell:
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oh noooo maybe give him one or two more kisses?? he might have been nervous since it took 3 months to get to that point
 
laCriolla said:
oh noooo maybe give him one or two more kisses?? he might have been nervous since it took 3 months to get to that point
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lol, thats what I was thinking. We have another date planned when he gets back home next weekend, and I was going to give it another try. If its as bad as the first time then we definitely need to just be buddies :look:
 
dollface0023 said:
lol, thats what I was thinking. We have another date planned when he gets back home next weekend, and I was going to give it another try. If its as bad as the first time then we definitely need to just be buddies :look:
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Yea give him another try. Or I just told one guy to give less wetness and it was great the next time! If you have full lips sometimes they get caught off guard LOL. (I don't know if you do but I am just saying)
 
What does it mean when a man is aggressively flirting with you but lists in his profile that he is a gay dj? :perplexed
 
can guys become addicted to online dating? I went out with one guy and we had a nice time. he calls every few days, but he's signed in online EVERY DAY like as soon as he gets in from work, also in the morning before work hours. OVer the monday off for the holiday i signed in and he was online!! and still there when i checked it again (i now go on to see if he's on). well, he didnt call me THAT day. what gives?
 
laCriolla said:
can guys become addicted to online dating? I went out with one guy and we had a nice time. he calls every few days, but he's signed in online EVERY DAY like as soon as he gets in from work, also in the morning before work hours. OVer the monday off for the holiday i signed in and he was online!! and still there when i checked it again (i now go on to see if he's on). well, he didnt call me THAT day. what gives?
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I think it can be addicting... it's like Facebook for singles. Not sure what site you're on, but I actually enjoyed answering most of OkCupid's questions and there are games and you can update your status.

I also think there can be an addiction to the dating part, too. Dates are so much fun! Most of the time... And when guys are new, they don't usually get on your nerves or anything. They're still trying! I try to be careful not to fall into the whole serial dating thing. Though I did notice a little extra cash in my checking account one month when I went on a lot of dates. I'm tossing around the word "addicting" rather loosely. But, yes, I think it can be easy to lose sight of one's goals on those sites, whatever the goal may be.

Sent from my T-Mobile G2 using T-Mobile G2
 
i have a few decent prospects at the mo'.

i've been talking to this one dood for like 3 weeks now and he's still not axed me out. all he does is hint. wtf? i'm tired of the long paragraphs back and forth; i graduated in May bro, i'm done with that. to be honest, although he's a cool guy, i'm not sure if i could ever bring myself to **** him. for now he's friend zoned for being so beta and white. mostly white.:lol:

another guy told me we have so much in common and :blah: i looked at his profile and we don't have **** in common:nono: for one, he appears to be a super Christian and i'm a super heathen. he's pretty chill though so i'll probably go out with him. he's definitely smangable and looks dtf. that Christian stuff ain't fooling me.:look:

the last guy is a super cute, young Indian doctor and i'm soooo happy. i don't have a preference for Indians but it feels good to be pursued by someone non-white for once. on top of the fact that he's cute and smart he's really funny and we both have a penchant for message boards.
 
dm81 said:
Means that you should stop talking with that confused man.


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
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I totally agree, but we don't actually talk. He is sending me e-flowers on the website and multiple times. I was thinking maybe he wanted a straight black friend. I feel this way because once upon a time when I went to a gay parade; :look: a few friends and I had run into a gay white guy who said that it was his dream to hang out with black women. :perplexed Anyhow, he seems like a freak, I won't respond to him.
 
I was bored and decided to check back into my online dating site and was greeted by a gentleman who left this pic......

i mean what the heck and i supposed do with this lol? :lachen: My laugh for the day
 

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To make a long story short, I met a woman on okcupid...she was way above the average good looking person on there. Pictures of her in all kinds of poses. We started talking and she told me she had alot of tragedy in her life. Her husband died in a motorcycle wreck and later on in the year, her brother died. We started talking every day but when it came time to meet, she flaked because she had an emergency with a friend. I decided I wanted to keep talking to her, so we kept chatting on okcupid and texting and talking on the phone. I grew really attached to her and she basically said she didnt want to meet yet because she was scared of being hurt like she has been before. We keep talking. prolly texting 100 times a day and talking every other day on the phone. Everything in her stories seem to fit. She wouldl send me pics all the time, prolly a hundread over the course of the year. She would tell me she loves me all the time, and that she cant wait to get her poo poo together and finally meet me. Then she had a melt down and she told me she went to London for a few months to a mental facility. Even though we were on different times zones...I would talk to her when i could. She got out, said she could not come back to Oregon because her dad was amking her take a job in Cali. Again, she was always good with the stories, she got a new tat, wold send me a pic of it and so forth.

Cut to yesterday, she had a long conversation with me about how she thinks she is a horrible person with issues and I deserve better. We have had this arguement alot before, but i always talk her into staying with me. She finally broke down an said she was not the person in the picures and everything she told me was a lie. Turns out she was sending me pics of a model that lived in London. This model would take so many pictues of her self, that there was always a picture for this fake girl to send me. She said she has been in my city the whole time, she did go to a mental facility, but it was here in town. She sent me a realy pic of herself and she was overweight. She said she went on okcupid and had no luck, so she decided to put another womans on to see how much attention she would get. She loved the attention from me so much, that through out the year, she never admitted to me who she really was, for fear of me walking away. She said she was so sorry and never meant for it to go on this long. I told her i need alot of time to think this over before i decide if i want to talk to her as a friend. My questions are these: Am I being shallow for maybe not wanting to talk to her again? It is not just the fact that she does not look like her pics, its that everthing was a lie. I was thinking that her personality was still real. Afterall, I talked to her on the phone, through email, and text every day.

The main problem is that my mind made me fall for a person that is not real. My brain put together a person that looked like the model, with the voice on the phone of this girl, plus everthing else. I dont know what to do at this point. Mayeb i could keep talking to her on the phone, because her personality and voice will be the same, but it is not the same.
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rayj.gif
 
The guy I met from OkCupid is going out of town for TEN days. For a conference. :-( I'm a little worried he'll stop liking me in that time period. But, I really hope not.

Sent from my T-Mobile G2 using T-Mobile G2
 
meesch said:
rayj.gif
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder is what they say :blush:...but realistic you have to do what you are comfortable with. Attraction needs to met on both parties but lying and keeping up a store like that tells alot about someone...I have no advice bc i dont know what i would do.

However, I fell in love with a great man that was not my type physically. But we worked together and I fell madly in love with him. We are no longer together but he is still a great friend....Good luck:ohwell:
 
Is it just me or is this dude really corny? http://www.okcupid.com/profile/mentalalchemy
He made his profile less corny in the past 15 mins, but I still don't think I'm a fan. A few minutes ago the "I'm good at" section consisted of: "being an Aquarius, which means being good at sex...."

He sent this message:
you look really familiar and I have no clue why. but in any event. how are you? :) all you've got is plenty enough. your essence makes up for it
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i stopped reading after the first line

"uniting my brothers and sisters." period. thats how you open your dating profile?

:lol:
 
laCriolla said:
can guys become addicted to online dating? I went out with one guy and we had a nice time. he calls every few days, but he's signed in online EVERY DAY like as soon as he gets in from work, also in the morning before work hours. OVer the monday off for the holiday i signed in and he was online!! and still there when i checked it again (i now go on to see if he's on). well, he didnt call me THAT day. what gives?
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I was thinking about this too! I don't know why I expect them to stop logging on, when I'm logging on but then again I'm logging on to see when they were on sometimes :sekret: Other times its out of habit since I have the POF app.
 
Ok so I went ahead and re-activated my okc page.We will see how it goes. A very special person here looked at my stuff a while ago and I took her approach of doing a very not so thinking profile..
 
Reminds me of TALL HOT BLONDE a documentary about a very attractive woman that had two co-workers fighting over her after they feel for her online! One man killed the other man and when the cops showed up to alert her, turned out that it wasnt the young woman at all.....it was her MOTHER! Damn shame.
 
Afro Puff said:
Thanks Lilac. I spoke to him this morning. Told him I'm not staying at his place. He said he understands and mentioned some alternative plans we could make. But none pleased me. Told him I'll just see him Sun or Mon instead.
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So, my Italian Stallion is still around. At this point I'm not interested though. I went to meet him the next day after I wrote my original post and he had me waiting for 20 mins so I left and went to a live jazz concert with another match.com guy that evening. I like this one though.

Italian Stallion was so impressed because according to him people wait hours for him without complaining. He owns a few businesses and has several employees and contractors that he manages. I guess they put up with his jerkish ways. Now, he's trying to ease his way back in. No thank you sir.

Moral of the story: men dig and respect women who don't put up with their ish...women who are willing to walk away from them & their foolishness...and women who have other options besides them. I also learned that dating is definitely a numbers game. In the beginning, it's best to have a pair and a spare until you get a commitment from the one you really want.
 
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