***Online Dating Support Thread***

[cheetarah1980]

For those on okcupid, do you answer those questions (for compatibility)? Or not really?

I've answered a bunch of them. They make for a more accurate match percentage. I like to see their answers to questions about whether they like documentaries, what does "wherefore art thou Romeo?" mean, etc. I can get a pretty good idea of how the person thinks (if they can think).

 

[pearlific1]

Today's foolishness:

Oh, did you just call me old? I'm just 30.


You get blocked too:


Best message I've received in months:

 

[MamitaLolita]

Two prospects now...one I actually like, the other has beautiful brown eyes that I'm a sucker for. I feel bad because I just don't see any way I can make myself emotionally available to someone I meet online, especially in my current state. But talking to other ppl def helps soothe my anxiety from the break up. It reminds me that I am attractive and guys do go for me...even if stupid ones I was too good for gave me up.

Eta the one I like sent me a message along the lines of not wanting to get involved but wanting to get to know me better...let me guess...he wants the booty?

 

[KiSseS03]

So I've decided to give online dating a try again Last month I swore it off but I'm a human, and human's are allowed to change their minds lol.

I signed up for POF. Last year I joined in January and was totally overwhelmed by the volume of messages and underwhelmed by the caliber of the messages-- I ended up deleting it within 2 weeks. I'm having a very different experience this time around; maybe my profile is better, or maybe its a seasonal thing... I'm really not sure but I've heard from quite a few really great guys, and have had some great conversations thus far. It's only been 4 days but so far so good.

I have 2 dates planned for this week. The first guy was one of the first men to message me and seems really interested. He's smart, just finished his Master's in Finance and works as a Financial Analyst. He works out 6 days a week and overall just seems like a really sweet guy that wants a relationship. We're supposed to meet on Friday

The second date will be with this super funny law student. He's in his last year and from the other side of the country, so I'll need to eventually figure out if he plans to stay. His profile says that he wants a relationship but we haven't talked much about that stuff; he's simply kept me laughing and I'm really hoping it translates in real life!

 

[MamitaLolita]

Somebody translate this from man to woman plz he lost me lol

 

[AnjelLuvs]

Somebody translate this from man to woman plz he lost me lol



View attachment 279673

In not so many words, he is not going to try it as he knows it will be a fail, so he is willing to see how things go cause you lok good... blush:

 

[CaraWalker]

he wants to bone you and his game is wack

 

[CaraWalker]

In not so many words, he is not going to try it as he knows it will be a fail, so he is willing to see how things go cause you lok good... blush:

correction: hes saying hes not going to try because it might prevent you from meeting him at all but once you agree hes definitely going to try

 

[MamitaLolita]

^ lmfao....thank you lol

 

[MzLady78]

He's probably gonna write me back calling me everything but a child of God, but this dude's profile gave me such a headache that I wrote him back "no offense, but you are entirely too old to be typing/spelling like that". Talking bout some damn "whud up, boo". Ninja please. Then he got the nerve to wonder why he's been on the site for a year with no luck. :hardslap:

 

[cheetarah1980]

This dude is 1 text message away from being cut off for good. I don't need a free lunch that badly.

On another note I met a guy from OKCupid for lunch yesterday. I knew going in I probably wouldn't be interested but he was so nice and trying so hard that I figured I should give him a chance. He actually brought me a rose, which while sweet, I really didn't like. One, because I hate flowers and two, because it made it obvious to everyone at the restaurant that we were on a first date/meeting. He asked me out again but I had to decline. He's really nice and I'm not trying to give him false hope.

 

[KiSseS03]

This city is so small lol. Yesterday I was walking home after work and ran right into one of the guys I had been chatting with on POF. I wasn't sure it was him at first but he recognized me, and came up to me. I was caught off guard so my shyness definitely kicked in and I put my hand out for a handshake lol, but he wanted a hug.

Anyway his profile lists him as 5'11 and that was definitely an embellishment... he was MAYBE 5'8... his voice was definitely sexier than I pictured though, it was really deep. He sent me a text when I got home, and he seems more interested now having verified that I'm real lol... but at the moment he's definitely not at the top of my list. For one, he's younger than me, two he's in his last year of engineering (this city is FULL of them) and ALL of my previous dates have been engineers... I'd like to try something new lol. Finally, I'm not convinced that he wants a relationship, even though his profile says so... I feel like he may still be sowing some wild oats.

 

[cheetarah1980]

This city is so small lol. Yesterday I was walking home after work and ran right into one of the guys I had been chatting with on POF. I wasn't sure it was him at first but he recognized me, and came up to me. I was caught off guard so my shyness definitely kicked in and I put my hand out for a handshake lol, but he wanted a hug.

Anyway his profile lists him as 5'11 and that was definitely an embellishment... he was MAYBE 5'8... his voice was definitely sexier than I pictured though, it was really deep. He sent me a text when I got home, and he seems more interested now having verified that I'm real lol... but at the moment he's definitely not at the top of my list. For one, he's younger than me, two he's in his last year of engineering (this city is FULL of them) and ALL of my previous dates have been engineers... I'd like to try something new lol. Finally, I'm not convinced that he wants a relationship, even though his profile says so... I feel like he may still be sowing some wild oats.

I'd be pissed that he lied about his height. That type of thing is a deal breaker for me.

 

[pearlific1]

I have found that many of the men I've met online have lied about their height. When I see 5'10+ listed on a profile I automatically subtract 3". I chatted up a very attractive Italian man back in May who listed his height as 6'0". When we met, he was about 5'8". I was so disappointed and his face could not save the possibility of me overlooking his height. I towered over him in my heels.

 

[cheetarah1980]

I have found that many of the men I've met online have lied about their height. When I see 5'10+ listed on a profile I automatically subtract 3". I chatted up a very attractive Italian man back in May who listed his height as 6'0". When we met, he was about 5'8". I was so disappointed and his face could not save the possibility of me overlooking his height. I towered over him in my heels.

I've only had the height thing happen to me once. He claimed to be 5'11 but he was more like 5'9.5-5'10. That's not egregious but it's enough for me to not be happy. I look at their pictures as well as the listed height to get an idea of how tall they are. The last three guys I met online were pretty true to their stated height. I wore heels and they were still taller.

On another note, I think I might be a bit harsh and mean with dudes online. Last night I finally chatted with this one guy on OKCupid who had been trying to talk to me for weeks. He has a picture on his profile captioned, "my first marathon" so I asked him which marathon he did. He says, "A short one. It was only 3.5 miles." I can't stand when people call any old road race a marathon!!! It irks me to no end. A marathon is 26.2 miles. If you haven't done 26.2 miles don't claim you did a marathon. I told him it wasn't a marathon, but he kept insisting that it was. I think I might have gotten kind of mean about it.

Then this morning a guy I replied to the previous evening sends me a message with his phone number in it. I hate that. I never asked for your number so why are you giving it to me? I just find it to be so freaking rude when dudes do that. I guess he thought he was really doing something by giving me his number so when I told him that the move was actually predictable I guess he caught feelings and stopped messaging me. Meh, he took too many mirror selfies anyway. I usually don't reply to guys like that but I'm trying to be understanding that not everyone presents themselves well online. Every time I try to relax my "no list" it doesn't go well. Did I mention that this dude had the nerve to write this to me?
"What kind of guy are you looking for? Usually the educated and professional sisters are running after thug guys and give professional guys like me a hard time. The hood bugger girls are running hard for professional guys like me and dissing the thug guys"

ETA: I just told another guy to use proper punctuation in his messages to me lest I think him less intelligent than he really is.

 

[CaraWalker]

sometimes i like when guys message me again after i ignored the first one. sometimes i just get lazy and dont feel like replying back then forget. if they send another ill reply cause im sort of interested so thanks for the follow up.

 

[CaraWalker]

I have found that many of the men I've met online have lied about their height. When I see 5'10+ listed on a profile I automatically subtract 3". I chatted up a very attractive Italian man back in May who listed his height as 6'0". When we met, he was about 5'8". I was so disappointed and his face could not save the possibility of me overlooking his height. I towered over him in my heels.

yeah i automatically assume theyre two to three inches shorter to the point where im surprised if theyre actually as tall as they say they are. i also think some men just dont actually know their height and are guessing or in denial. seriously some men will argue with you if you say "well im this height so you definitely cant be that height..." not that i condone arguing on dates, ESPECIALLY first dates. i have a no debates/no arguing rule in the courting stage.

 

[pearlific1]

yeah i automatically assume theyre two to three inches shorter to the point where im surprised if theyre actually as tall as they say they are. i also think some men just dont actually know their height and are guessing or in denial. seriously some men will argue with you if you say "well im this height so you definitely cant be that height..." not that i condone arguing on dates, ESPECIALLY first dates. i have a no debates/no arguing rule in the courting stage.

The 5'8" guy ARGUED with me regarding his height on the second date. He mentioned that I was on the tall side and I told him I also had tall siblings. He asked their heights and stated they weren't much taller than him...my brothers are 6'3-6'4 He was sure that he was at least 6'0". I told him he wasn't and it set him off. That was it for me.

 

[CaraWalker]

The 5'8" guy ARGUED with me regarding his height on the second date. He mentioned that I was on the tall side and I told him I also had tall siblings. He asked their heights and stated they weren't much taller than him...my brothers are 6'3-6'4 He was sure that he was at least 6'0". I told him he wasn't and it set him off. That was it for me.

me on that date:

him - how tall are you?

me - five eight

him - you cant be because im six feet

me - oh ok *laughs at him*

i hate dudes who think arguing is a conversation or flirty banter

 

[Simply_elle]

These nigras are really getting upset over height! Haha!

 

[Oasis]

every guy i've gone out with has lied about his height. one guy told me he was 6'4''. this dude had to be every bit of 6'7-8". walking and talking with him was so uncomfortable and to hold hands i had to literally lift my arm. i like tall guys but there is a limit.

 

[CaraWalker]

every guy i've gone out with has lied about his height. one guy told me he was 6'4''. this dude had to be every bit of 6'7-8". walking and talking with him was so uncomfortable and to hold hands i had to literally lift my arm. i like tall guys but there is a limit.

everybody lying in both directions trying to hit that six feet - six three sweet spot

 

[CaraWalker]

well well well looky here... did hear back from last weeks tinder date after all. im shocked. had considered that a non starter.

also i loled:

 

[CaraWalker]

okcupid deleted my profile. i noticed that it dropped from 150+ average visits to none and it stayed that way for weeks. i sent them a feedback message asking if there was something wrong with my profile (where there is usually a "boost visibility" button, mine said "add images" even though i had several pics uploaded) and by the end of the day my profile was deleted.

smh. ice cold, okcupid

 

[CaraWalker]

they be thinking im playing

 

[preciouslove0x]

Tinder is too legit. I'm meeting quite a few eligible men on it. Going on a second date with one tonight. I've known him for less than a week and we've already had hour long phone convos. Can I be honest? This feels like a sappy love story that only exists in movies. Thanks Tinder

 

[TopShelf]

Tinder is too legit. I'm meeting quite a few eligible men on it. Going on a second date with one tonight. I've known him for less than a week and we've already had hour long phone convos. Can I be honest? This feels like a sappy love story that only exists in movies. Thanks Tinder

Yeah.....I've been having a good time with it. Date last Sunday and this Sunday. Misssed an.impromptu date on Thursday because I was too tired

 

[Simply_elle]

Ok Cupid back up... Pray for me y'all.

Eta: lawd it starts...! Peep that screename

 

[*SkolarStar*]

So... I'm online dating. I have an okc profile. Been on one date so far. There are others I'm talking to. I had a tinder long ago and deleted it because I heard that it was for people looking for f- buddies our one night stands. From what I'm reading here, that's not true.

My question is, how are you making tinder work?

 

[cheetarah1980]

So... I'm online dating. I have an okc profile. Been on one date so far. There are others I'm talking to. I had a tinder long ago and deleted it because I heard that it was for people looking for f- buddies our one night stands. From what I'm reading here, that's not true.

My question is, how are you making tinder work?

To me Tinder is a closer approximation to meeting someone when you're out. You're mutually attracted and then you have to chat to get to know each other. Most of my recent dates have been from Tinder and they've been really good. I use the same filters I would irl to decide if I'm interested. I spent most of this weekend with a guy I met on Tinder. Friday night was dinner and drinks. Saturday was an afternoon boat tour followed by dinner and then hanging out at a hotel bar in the evening. I even met several of his friends. Today we had lunch. Tinder is what you make it so if all you want is a hookup you can find it. If you want to date you can find that too. I think people represent what they're looking for via their profiles (intentionally and unintentionally). I find it pretty easy to weed guys out.