SqrpioQutie
Well-Known Member
lol - i'd hate to see how it would have gone down if he had been mean about it....
i'd love to see the woman who is ok with all of that though.... and what she brings to the table...
***Online Dating Support Thread***
- Thread starter JollyGal
- Start date
lol - i'd hate to see how it would have gone down if he had been mean about it....
i'd love to see the woman who is ok with all of that though.... and what she brings to the table...
Katherina
Well-Known Member
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
So im fairly new to online dating and was curious to know if you ladies were sending guys messages or letting them contact you? I haven't contacted any guys first I'll usually take a look at a guy's profile that im interested in and that's it. I don't want to look like im thirsty.
mischka
shrinkage.
Sometimes I message first but only if I have something witty to say. It's usually a waste of time though because generally they don't reply back if I message first but whatever, worth a shot eh? The only time it's a sure thing is if I deduce they rated me high (this is easy enough on okcupid, just compare the choices they give you with your visitors and you can usually pick him out that way); then it's "safe" to message them first and expect a response.
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
So this cute guy sent me a message on okcupid we are an 86% match and we don't live too far from each other. He complimented me on my smile so I replied thank you. He then sent another message a couple of hours later asking me a little bit more about myself. So being that I put a pretty detailed description on my profile I replied saying well everything is mostly in my profile but if there is anything in particular he would like to know he could just ask. He then replies saying that he had to handle some business but he would really like to talk to me and left his name and number and said to call or text whenever I had time. He seems my speed and might have some potential so I'm debating whether or not I should call. I would much rather him court me. Its like all the guys are so eager to give out their numbers. Everyone that hits me up sends me one or two messages then throws their number out there. I mean is this how this online dating thing goes and I'm just being a bit of a prude? I don't particularly want a bunch of random guys having my number.
mischka
shrinkage.
I think I'm about to get asked out for this weekend but I'm really not up to going 
I've had too many nowhere experiences with okcupid and am really not ready to try again just yet even though I like this guy (and he's 6'3 
)
eta: The guys I talk to on okcupid don't throw their phone numbers at me. We usually have a long back and forth message (paragraph length messages) for a few days, sometimes a week or more, before we decide to exchange numbers or whatever and then it's usually because we're planning to meet. But I haven't gotten a number from anyone that I didn't talk extensively with first.
I've had too many nowhere experiences with okcupid and am really not ready to try again just yet even though I like this guy (and he's 6'3 )eta: The guys I talk to on okcupid don't throw their phone numbers at me. We usually have a long back and forth message (paragraph length messages) for a few days, sometimes a week or more, before we decide to exchange numbers or whatever and then it's usually because we're planning to meet. But I haven't gotten a number from anyone that I didn't talk extensively with first.
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LifeafterLHCF
New Member
Msstarr718 when you say "court" what is your definition? I know everyone is different as I am not the type to message for millions of years.Maybe a few messages and lets see where it goes.I know I turned one guy off by throwing my number out there but I'm very to the point all the games and rules just don't feel right to me.
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
Well he first contacted me on the 14th and I haven't called him yet and he hasn't come back to my page or sent me a message since. So I feel like if he was that interested he would have sent me a message saying hey sorry for the other night but I was waiting for you to contact me and maybe we could have stuck up a convo from there. To me that would have been him courting me. I guess I'm just used to the man being the aggressor and when a man is interested then he will make it known. So at this point I'm feeling like he didn't want to talk to me that bad being that he hasn't sent me anymore messages. Such a shame because he's a 6' caramel cutie just like I like em
. Maybe Ill give it a couple of more days then send him a text 
. And I definitely feel you on the not being with all the games and rules but unfortunately their are games and rules when it comes to dating and if you don't play along that's when you get hurt. I'm a pretty straight to the point person as well but that hasn't worked for me in the past so I'm switching the game up.
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
Well he first contacted me on the 14th and I haven't called him yet and he hasn't come back to my page or sent me a message since. So I feel like if he was that interested he would have sent me a message saying hey sorry for the other night but I was waiting for you to contact me and maybe we could have stuck up a convo from there. To me that would have been him courting me. I guess I'm just used to the man being the aggressor and when a man is interested then he will make it known. So at this point I'm feeling like he didn't want to talk to me that bad being that he hasn't sent me anymore messages. Such a shame because he's a 6' caramel cutie just like I like em
I got you.Anytime I try to act coy I mess up real bad.Its like it's not natural so I don't even try to play games.But I feel you on the men need to be the aggressor.Since I have never had this occur I definitely don't know how to deal with such.Maybe this go around I will be able to know how it feels to be pursued and not pursue.
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
So this Asian guy sent me a message saying hello. So I visited his profile and wasn't interested so I didn't feel the need to further the conversation. 10 minutes later he sent me an IM saying what didn't you like about my profile, what you don't think my d!ck is big enough 
erplexed #icant 
erplexed #icant
mischka
shrinkage.
So this Asian guy sent me a message saying hello. So I visited his profile and wasn't interested so I didn't feel the need to further the conversation. 10 minutes later he sent me an IM saying what didn't you like about my profile, what you don't think my d!ck is big enough
nothing will top the creepazoid who messaged me asking why i thought white women dated black men because he was trying to get off on tricking me into saying black guys have huge cawks
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
Bwahahahahahahahaa!
I just came back from outing with RK. Sort of a typical first meeting--had a light late lunch at a cafe, sitting outside...talked about where we grew up, went to school, work, random interests. Small injections of awkward/nervous here and there, but otherwise mostly painless and relaxed. He's cuter than his pictures. I adore cute nerds.
He's busy with school this week (night classes for MBA), plus I'm going to be out of town for a conference, so I don't know what's next. I'm trying to decide if I should text him later, or wait for him to say something...
Me personally I would wait for him to say something or at least wait til tomorrow to text him.
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
Why did this baby im me on okc..I mean you see Im 25 your 20 still in college that ain't going to work but he seems sweet
ETA:What the hell why is these young dudes hollering at me? Im 25 Im old as hell..this guy last night emailed me with the worst grammar and I slightly turned him down because I hate when folks do the all lower case in their writing.I'm no mischka but I try to write fluid.
Lord help me I don't know about the youngins.
ETA:What the hell why is these young dudes hollering at me? Im 25 Im old as hell..this guy last night emailed me with the worst grammar and I slightly turned him down because I hate when folks do the all lower case in their writing.I'm no mischka but I try to write fluid.
Lord help me I don't know about the youngins.
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I'm still new to this whole online dating thing, but I met with my first okc guy today. We went to see a movie. He picked the place. I'm still bitter about it because we each had to pay $15 jut for parking, plus the cost of the movie.
I wouldn't really consider it a date. We went dutch on everything. After the movie, we drove to Starbucks and had coffee and conversation. I'm 26 and I like them young, but he looked so young to me...he is 22. The last man (boy) I seriously dated was 21, I was 24 and things were cool, so I figured wth.
I can usually tell right away if there is chemistry and there wasn't. I don't think we will spend much time together because he's moving away for grad school in August. I'm at the point right now where I think I'm done with online dating.
The last few messages I've gotten on okc were all guys that have something negative to say about my alma mater. I'm so tired of men thinking they can talk trash about my school and think I'll still want to talk to them afterwards...yes, it's that deep. I love my school! It's one of the "public ivies" and therefore draws a lot of haters, but leave that crap for a sports game...it's just annoying.
I wouldn't really consider it a date. We went dutch on everything. After the movie, we drove to Starbucks and had coffee and conversation. I'm 26 and I like them young, but he looked so young to me...he is 22. The last man (boy) I seriously dated was 21, I was 24 and things were cool, so I figured wth.
I can usually tell right away if there is chemistry and there wasn't. I don't think we will spend much time together because he's moving away for grad school in August. I'm at the point right now where I think I'm done with online dating.
The last few messages I've gotten on okc were all guys that have something negative to say about my alma mater. I'm so tired of men thinking they can talk trash about my school and think I'll still want to talk to them afterwards...yes, it's that deep. I love my school! It's one of the "public ivies" and therefore draws a lot of haters, but leave that crap for a sports game...it's just annoying.
mischka
shrinkage.
Did anyone get one of these from okcupid?
How'd You Like to Help Moderate the Site? Jun 19, 2011 – 4:03pm
Hey there !
Thanks for being a loyal and active member of the OkCupid community! We wish everyone could be such an upstanding citizen, but like any user-driven website, OkCupid attracts its share of trolls, scammers, and people who just don't follow directions well. To help minimize this element, we'd like to invite you to moderate the many reports of misbehavior that we receive daily.
Moderating can be fun, but it's not for the faint of heart. If you've never seen a rated-R movie in your life, you may want to sit this battle out. Otherwise, accept our gratitude for embarking on a journey into the dark recesses of online dating!
"Report Moderation" is now active under the "Treasures" menu!
How'd You Like to Help Moderate the Site? Jun 19, 2011 – 4:03pm
Hey there !
Thanks for being a loyal and active member of the OkCupid community! We wish everyone could be such an upstanding citizen, but like any user-driven website, OkCupid attracts its share of trolls, scammers, and people who just don't follow directions well. To help minimize this element, we'd like to invite you to moderate the many reports of misbehavior that we receive daily.
Moderating can be fun, but it's not for the faint of heart. If you've never seen a rated-R movie in your life, you may want to sit this battle out. Otherwise, accept our gratitude for embarking on a journey into the dark recesses of online dating!
"Report Moderation" is now active under the "Treasures" menu!
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
As did I. I needed that laugh.
Luckily I haven't come across any of those types. I don't think I could handle it as well as Mischka did. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
Oh I wish I could have few of you ladies look at my profile to see what my issue is.I don't do thugs nor those who have no grammar.Its so sad.
mischka
shrinkage.
This is pretty much the only thing that's on my profile:
Please don't be stupid, short, or gross. I don't ask for much, do I?
I plan to spend the summer taking yoga classes while wearing tank tops and drinking tea from starbucks. god, i can't wait.
now GoddessMaker you know I wanna take a look. pm me a link.
Please don't be stupid, short, or gross. I don't ask for much, do I?
I plan to spend the summer taking yoga classes while wearing tank tops and drinking tea from starbucks. god, i can't wait.
now GoddessMaker you know I wanna take a look. pm me a link.
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mischka
shrinkage.
GoddessMaker, we are a 76 percent match 
now that I think about it, I'm gonna show up in your visitors' list now... please do me a favor and don't blast my photos.
I would say for one thing you don't space after commas and periods; that jumbles up your writing...
also I would probably take off "Christian and serious about it"... okcupid tends to lean very liberal/atheist, and that might be a turn off... I'd let them find out about it in due time unless you want to weed out the non-religious. I might also go for a bit more humor or wit as your profile can read a little dry without anything particularly eye catching. I went with eccentric, as you can see
now that I think about it, I'm gonna show up in your visitors' list now... please do me a favor and don't blast my photos. I would say for one thing you don't space after commas and periods; that jumbles up your writing...
also I would probably take off "Christian and serious about it"... okcupid tends to lean very liberal/atheist, and that might be a turn off... I'd let them find out about it in due time unless you want to weed out the non-religious. I might also go for a bit more humor or wit as your profile can read a little dry without anything particularly eye catching. I went with eccentric, as you can see
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
CurliDiva
Well-Known Member
What is up with men asking for more pictures in the first email? Why would I be motivated to send photos of myself to a complete stranger?
You can clearly see ME in the photos that I have posted.
Also, why do guys also want to use a real email versus the site's right away?
Feels like a “wiener” situation in the making……
You can clearly see ME in the photos that I have posted.
Also, why do guys also want to use a real email versus the site's right away?
Feels like a “wiener” situation in the making……
VelvetRain
Well-Known Member
I've always wondered that too CurlDiva. I am not back on the market with online dating but it never failed for someone to ask for more photos despite the many posted or trying to email off the site.
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
This young guy 23 really is trying to chat with me.I don't know Im a bit nervous I believe moreso because I have this fantasy of what should be but real life and fantasy arent always..lets see how this goes
