***Online Dating Support Thread***

cinnamin316 said:
I met this guy 5 weeks ago and everything great with him. We have so much in common and want the same things out of life. We talk on the phone for hours at a time and its never a dull moment. He told me I have all the qualities in a woman that he looks for and if things keep progressing he can see me becoming his wife. The only problem is that he lives out of state, like really far. He comes to my state every couple of months and told me he would be here within a month or two. He's already planned our first date and everything. He planned on moving to my state next year and has already talked about how it would be so nice to be that close to me. He even told his mom about me. But because this is a long distance relationship I still have my guard up. I'm still taking this one day at a time to see where this leads.
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Yes, you really need to establish chemistry in person. I was in a long distance relationship last year. When we met in person, after 2 mos, I didn't feel the same way. He also looked different in person. We probably should have Skyped.
 
cinnamin316 said:
I met this guy 5 weeks ago and everything great with him. We have so much in common and want the same things out of life. We talk on the phone for hours at a time and its never a dull moment. He told me I have all the qualities in a woman that he looks for and if things keep progressing he can see me becoming his wife. The only problem is that he lives out of state, like really far. He comes to my state every couple of months and told me he would be here within a month or two. He's already planned our first date and everything. He planned on moving to my state next year and has already talked about how it would be so nice to be that close to me. He even told his mom about me. But because this is a long distance relationship I still have my guard up. I'm still taking this one day at a time to see where this leads.
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This is how me and my SO started. I knew we were going to be together. 18 months and 5 states later (we both moved to different places Btwn that time) we are living together and I had a job set up when I moved. That was nothing but the universe. I wrote down what I wanted and I got it.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
Briabiggles said:
Awe man! Is she that ambiguous? You'd think people would disclose that kind of info but you never know I guess!

Sent from my iPad mini mini.
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the limbs do look very long, and the chest is always covered beyond the cleavage line. you know how crossdressing men just have that skinny, gangly thing going on that most adult women do not.
 
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Jazzmommy said:
Yes, you really need to establish chemistry in person. I was in a long distance relationship last year. When we met in person, after 2 mos, I didn't feel the same way. He also looked different in person. We probably should have Skyped.
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This is what I am afraid of. I told him about this fear of mine and he assured me that I should not worry, but we'll see.

tinkat said:
This is how me and my SO started. I knew we were going to be together. 18 months and 5 states later (we both moved to different places Btwn that time) we are living together and I had a job set up when I moved. That was nothing but the universe. I wrote down what I wanted and I got it.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
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Wow, that is so nice. Congrats to you and your SO. I am hoping for a happy ending like this. This post has really given me hope for us, thanks.
 
Okay said:
Ok I wanna try online dating :lol: Which site do ya'll recommend? I heard ok cupid is good. How about Match.com?
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Met my BF of 3-1/2 years on okcupid... Neither of us were looking for anything more than friendship and but we were so compatible it quickly grew into more. :-)

Match could be a good place to meet someone but be careful there are a lot of "shoppers" not buyers on many of the dating sites.
 
I joined OKC last week and I noticed that about 75% of the guys who view my profile are white. I think that's odd. Or does that site have a white majority?
 
cinnamin316 said:
This is what I am afraid of. I told him about this fear of mine and he assured me that I should not worry, but we'll see. Wow, that is so nice. Congrats to you and your SO. I am hoping for a happy ending like this. This post has really given me hope for us, thanks.
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Thanks! It was worth it. I am glad I didn't limit myself base on distance, I went on compatibility. Just take your time getting to know eachother. Skyping and/or FaceTime is very critical at this stage. Ironically I learned more about him earlier compared to guys I met the "regular" way bc there was a physical barrier. Ask hard questions now and let him know what you are looking for long term.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
re: my profile expressing a desire to see an upcoming show:

After the concert is there a chance of platonic, sexual, adhesiveness going on?
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what? "platonic sexual adhesiveness"? doing the most gone wrong once more :lol: stop trying to sound smart when you dumb, y'all.
 
On the OKC Windows phone app, when you look at your own profile, it still shows you your match/friend/enemy percentages. Why am I only a 99% match for myself?! :lachen: Where'd the other 1% go?!
 
I'm not cut out for this :nono: weirded out on day one!!

A message:

Dear Highheeled Hardwood Seductions,

Like a message in a bottle, I send this Your way not knowing if I will ever receive its reply.

However, Your glamour entices me.

Knowing this may seem impulsive, I simply wanted to show some sincere initiative. For You look like a million dollars : Yours, DCG, is a supreme beauty that appears so naturally; Your subtle, yet stunning smiles bedazzle and radiate such a ladylike charm; Your inducing allure of Sex is something that, quite frankly, I cannot ignore, and would like to address with You.

These characteristics I admire, as I would not forgive myself if I didn't ask if You'd like to get to know each other. For I share Your affinity towards Sentences Complete, and aspire to become Your Mr. Sweet.


Au Revoir,

Nicholas
 
Simply_elle said:
I'm not cut out for this :nono: weirded out on day one!!

A message:. For I share Your affinity towards Sentences Complete, and aspire to become Your Mr. Sweet.


Au Revoir,

Nicholas
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I'm gasping for air over here!!!!!! :lachen: :lachen::lachen:
Who. Says. That :rofl: No he did not break out the Dr. Seuss rhymes!!!

After my best friend turned lover man debacle, I decided to take this momentum and throw myself into online dating :yep:. I've only gotten a few crap messages on OKCupid (joys of not putting casual sex in what you're looking for), but I've gotten a good number of actual full response messages from my Craigslist post :look:. Part of me's excited, the other part is like I'm too lazy for all this effort :lol:
 
Simply_elle said:
I'm not cut out for this :nono: weirded out on day one!!

A message:

Dear Highheeled Hardwood Seductions,

Like a message in a bottle, I send this Your way not knowing if I will ever receive its reply.

However, Your glamour entices me.

Knowing this may seem impulsive, I simply wanted to show some sincere initiative. For You look like a million dollars : Yours, DCG, is a supreme beauty that appears so naturally; Your subtle, yet stunning smiles bedazzle and radiate such a ladylike charm; Your inducing allure of Sex is something that, quite frankly, I cannot ignore, and would like to address with You.

These characteristics I admire, as I would not forgive myself if I didn't ask if You'd like to get to know each other. For I share Your affinity towards Sentences Complete, and aspire to become Your Mr. Sweet.


Au Revoir,

Nicholas
Click to expand...

LoL! This reads like a mass email. Guys send these poems out all of the time.
 
Ok, I'll throw the message I received this afternoon into the pile.

Hello love... How are you? Happy Thursday? Idk it's hard for me to be happy about Thursday, but lets review the positives. A) i found your page. B) your absolutely stunning. C) your smiling by now at my wit and funny charming compliments. D) if your day was really starting out kinda " bla " it just took a turn for the better. lol. So in review what did we learn.... A Thursday can be happy even if just in the moment someone does and says something small that had a lasting affect on you. The only other thing that could improve our moment together is if your write me back so I'm not left here like an idiot typing into your inbox all alone.. lol
 
janiebaby said:
Ok, I'll throw the message I received this afternoon into the pile. Hello love... How are you? Happy Thursday? Idk it's hard for me to be happy about Thursday, but lets review the positives. A) i found your page. B) your absolutely stunning. C) your smiling by now at my wit and funny charming compliments. D) if your day was really starting out kinda " bla " it just took a turn for the better. lol. So in review what did we learn.... A Thursday can be happy even if just in the moment someone does and says something small that had a lasting affect on you. The only other thing that could improve our moment together is if your write me back so I'm not left here like an idiot typing into your inbox all alone.. lol
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p

"Your" going to need a Motrin after reading these messages... I think a drink is more in order. God bless these men :whyme:
 
janiebaby said:
Ok, I'll throw the message I received this afternoon into the pile. Hello love... How are you? Happy Thursday? Idk it's hard for me to be happy about Thursday, but lets review the positives. A) i found your page. B) your absolutely stunning. C) your smiling by now at my wit and funny charming compliments. D) if your day was really starting out kinda " bla " it just took a turn for the better. lol. So in review what did we learn.... A Thursday can be happy even if just in the moment someone does and says something small that had a lasting affect on you. The only other thing that could improve our moment together is if your write me back so I'm not left here like an idiot typing into your inbox all alone.. lol
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Maybe I am too nice but that was a cute message.
 
Hello...!

A quick question, how long do you guys wait before meeting? This email thing just seems to drone on and kills the vibe somewhat. I think it would be easier for me to just have coffee and lunch and size them up there but I don't know.

What say you?

So far: there's a 34 y/o black man who's a recent transplant. Young professional type..Very sweet and heart on his sleeve.... He's very interested, kind of look forward to meeting him.

One 49 year old doctor. I've seen him around and he's the typical Jewish good boy. Seems VERY interested in settling down. Doesn't look his age.

One 30 year old doctor... Not really my kind. He's the short, miserly seeming Jew doctor. Lol

^ I'm getting doctors I presume bc I put nurse in the about me? I've had like 5!

Like 20 or so 20-26 year olds like hey. I'm seeking men over 30. Mommas got NO time to raise a man. Young boys *ew* (in my jimmy Fallon voice)

Ok Cupid wins hands down, match.com is a joke and a waste of money not to mention time.

Going about this with some seriousness... I don't want to become too jaded... I feel myself getting there.
 
Keshieshimmer said:
Maybe I am too nice but that was a cute message.
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It is cute but it sounds like another mass message.

A guy types up a witty/romantic generic message knowing most women love to be complimented on our eyes/smile/beauty. There is never anything specific about your profile in the message to indicate that he actually read it. No real question about something you've written in your profile. Some guys even say they just send these out en masse without even looking at a profile to see who responds.:perplexed Then they'll check out her profile.

Sometimes I'll reply back something like "Thank you for the nice message. Good luck in your search! :)" but most of the time I ignore them.

I've had more success searching for guys that I like and messaging them.:yep: Most of them don't have women sending them messages like that. And they happily take the lead from there. The only problem I've had is being accused of "catfishing" because they don't believe I'm real. I take it as a compliment though. LoL
 
Simply_elle said:
Hello...!

A quick question, how long do you guys wait before meeting? This email thing just seems to drone on and kills the vibe somewhat. I think it would be easier for me to just have coffee and lunch and size them up there but I don't know.

What say you?

So far: there's a 34 y/o black man who's a recent transplant. Young professional type..Very sweet and heart on his sleeve.... He's very interested, kind of look forward to meeting him.

One 49 year old doctor. I've seen him around and he's the typical Jewish good boy. Seems VERY interested in settling down. Doesn't look his age.

One 30 year old doctor... Not really my kind. He's the short, miserly seeming Jew doctor. Lol

^ I'm getting doctors I presume bc I put nurse in the about me? I've had like 5!

Like 20 or so 20-26 year olds like hey. I'm seeking men over 30. Mommas got NO time to raise a man. Young boys *ew* (in my jimmy Fallon voice)

Ok Cupid wins hands down, match.com is a joke and a waste of money not to mention time.

Going about this with some seriousness... I don't want to become too jaded... I feel myself getting there.
Click to expand...

That's what I did most. A short pre-date to see if it was even worth it to peruse a date.
 
Another one went ghost. 2 nice dates followed by meaningless texts but not asking for a third date. I don't know if he's waiting for me to suggest a date but I ain't gonna bring it up.
Sigh, don't know what I'm doing wrong.........
 
Simply_elle

I'm pretty upfront, but very sweet about things. I like to meet as soon as possible and after a phone call. So we'll exchange messages on the site and if he doesn't give me his number or ask for mine, I'll ask "Why haven't you asked for my phone number?" If he feels that's too forward, then he's not my guy. But typically, he'll explain that he was trying to be respectful/ feel me out. No biggie.

GL girl! :) And I totally agree that OKC has been a better experience.
 
MzSwift

I came on my PC for mentions then I saw your siggy... *** dating I want your hair! Lol

Thank you for the encouragement. The Black guy and I have a date at a seafood joint tomorrow night. I'm keeping my cool but it's nice to go out again, and someone else is paying!:look: #dontjudge I'm also super excited because hes black, and seems pretty cool. None of that hey sexy foolishness.

Speaking of: I got a message from a bruh man, "You look like you got some good crayonbox ma.:blush: Oh. Ok. Glad you got that via pictures.


I'm really, really... Ready for the uh, intimate side of dating. However I don't want to muddle anyone serious, too soon. I'm thinking of keeping a maintenance man... *sigh* I'm not about "the rules" and I agree on making them work, but I think this "rules" BS keeps men away. I can't keep that aloof thing going. **** if someone did that to me I'd KIM.

Thanks for the ear...
 
Simply_elle

Thanks, lady :)

Can't wait to hear about your date!

Yeah, I agree about "the rules." I even put in my profile that I don't follow rules. If I feel like calling/texting a guy, I'm gonna do it. If a guy doesn't call me for a few days after a date then I'll assume he isn't interested.

Color when you wanna color... and have fun doing it! :D
 
MzSwift said:
Simply_elle

Thanks, lady :)

Can't wait to hear about your date!

Yeah, I agree about "the rules." I even put in my profile that I don't follow rules. If I feel like calling/texting a guy, I'm gonna do it. If a guy doesn't call me for a few days after a date then I'll assume he isn't interested.

Color when you wanna color... and have fun doing it! :D
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So if you don't hear from him after a date and you don't call him, isn't that following the rules?

Should i text the guy in the situation i described above? He did contact me but didn't ask me on another date.
 
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