***Online Dating Support Thread***

It bothers me, and have skipped those profiles But I don't have kids so...
I think I'd be bothered if someone had a picture of my child posted on a public site.
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
It bothers me, and have skipped those profiles But I don't have kids so...
I think I'd be bothered if someone had a picture of my child posted on a public site.
Click to expand...

I know what you mean. I hate seeing kids in pics.. too many pervs. Since I have a child, I prefer to date guys with a kid.. don't think a minor should be on a public site. Lord knows where my pics are in cyber space. : look:
 
I am not getting guys, why send a random tip picture, if ya get what I mean... I already started to feel as though if it wasnt a topic he initiated then he is not interested in talking on phone and will go back to bbm... its hard weeding out these characters...

then this other guy is like plan a date and I am all flustered as what to do... should I pick out expensive resturant ala the rules, WMLB so he can get hint to plan going forward or just pick applebees... But why should I sell self short...
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:
I am not getting guys, why send a random tip picture, if ya get what I mean... I already started to feel as though if it wasnt a topic he initiated then he is not interested in talking on phone and will go back to bbm... its hard weeding out these characters...

then this other guy is like plan a date and I am all flustered as what to do... should I pick out expensive resturant ala the rules, WMLB so he can get hint to plan going forward or just pick applebees... But why should I sell self short...
Click to expand...

If a guy asked me to plan a date I would be put off.
I have planned dates WITH a guy or I have let HIM plan it all but I've never planned the details all by myself.
 
outspokenwallflower said:
What websites are you ladies having success on?

I'm dabbling around and just not having any luck. I need the 411!
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I think it depends on demographics etc,, I haven't had much luck on free sites such as OK Cupid. I've had zero success on E harmony. I met my last SO on BPM ( dentist) and dated professional guys from Match ( physician, engineer, school principal etc.,) Hmm.. think I need to go back on Match. : look:
 
Bublin said:
If a guy asked me to plan a date I would be put off.
I have planned dates WITH a guy or I have let HIM plan it all but I've never planned the details all by myself.
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He is from another part of city, Mt. vernon, and we are to meet in my part, Harlem... I picked a nice spot...

My thing is no SET plans are made... Like ok I told him lets do this resturant, but no time was designated... I dont want to seem pushy, and trying to find right words to express that I dont want to waste time, or till last minute... i feel so bad at these things...

ETa: I just flat out told him, as I picked out resturant that ball was in his corner, to which there was no response, well actually just an OK... I just replied, Lol, was looking for a time as not interested in last minute planning...

 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:

He is from another part of city, Mt. vernon, and we are to meet in my part, Harlem... I picked a nice spot...

My thing is no SET plans are made... Like ok I told him lets do this resturant, but no time was designated... I dont want to seem pushy, and trying to find right words to express that I dont want to waste time, or till last minute... i feel so bad at these things...

ETa: I just flat out told him, as I picked out resturant that ball was in his corner, to which there was no response, well actually just an OK... I just replied, Lol, was looking for a time as not interested in last minute planning...

Click to expand...

It's fair enough that since you intend to meet near to you that you pick the venue but you need enthusiasm on his part and I can tell you're getting zero from him.
I would pull back and if he is serious he will eventually have to bring up the time of the date.
I had something similar recently and pulled back. Turns out he wasn't serious because he never called to firm up plans and I certainly didn't call him.
 
So I'd been chatting back and forth with this dude for awhile. Too long. I got bored and stopped responding. So today he sends me this message like he got a little attitude, talking about should he stop trying to talk to me. So I told him I was getting bored. He's like he's new to the online thing and was just trying to get to know me to see if I wanted to meet. I told him I don't think this the most effective way to go about it- talking on the phone, texting (I've actually started to prefer it :look:) would be better. This negro goes "so do you want my number"? I logged off.

Maybe I'm coming off like a bit of a b-word, but really?
 
MzLady78 said:
So I'd been chatting back and forth with this dude for awhile. Too long. I got bored and stopped responding. So today he sends me this message like he got a little attitude, talking about should he stop trying to talk to me. So I told him I was getting bored. He's like he's new to the online thing and was just trying to get to know me to see if I wanted to meet. I told him I don't think this the most effective way to go about it- talking on the phone, texting (I've actually started to prefer it :look:) would be better. This negro goes "so do you want my number"? I logged off.

Maybe I'm coming off like a bit of a b-word, but really?
Click to expand...

Im laughing here. Sorry girl

He seems awkward, if you wanna give him a chance..give him your # and put it back in his court without saying a word

:lachen: these dudes are hilarious.
 
MzLady78 said:
So I'd been chatting back and forth with this dude for awhile. Too long. I got bored and stopped responding. So today he sends me this message like he got a little attitude, talking about should he stop trying to talk to me. So I told him I was getting bored. He's like he's new to the online thing and was just trying to get to know me to see if I wanted to meet. I told him I don't think this the most effective way to go about it- talking on the phone, texting (I've actually started to prefer it :look:) would be better. This negro goes "so do you want my number"? I logged off.

Maybe I'm coming off like a bit of a b-word, but really?
Click to expand...

Sigh! This has dragged on long enough.:lol:

Maybe you can give him one more chance by schooling him?
Letting him know he would pursue someone online the same way he would IRL, as in NINJA you should ask me for my number. If he doesn't get it, then I give up.

Your call.:spinning:
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
Sigh! This has dragged on long enough.:lol:

Maybe you can give him one more chance by schooling him?
Letting him know he would pursue someone online the same way he would IRL, as in NINJA you should ask me for my number. If he doesn't get it, then I give up.

Your call.:spinning:
Click to expand...

FelaShrine said:
Im laughing here. Sorry girl

He seems awkward, if you wanna give him a chance..give him your # and put it back in his court without saying a word

:lachen: these dudes are hilarious.
Click to expand...

Ugh, I guess I could cut him some slack.

I just feel like damn, that's Women 101. If you don't know how to step up and initiate this, I'm giving you the side-eye.
 
I'm side eyeing, too. BUT, not everyone is used to this way of "dating". Logging on to a computer and messaging people. I fail at online dating. I'm still "old fashioned". Giving him a chance is not so bad, but NINJA also needs to learn quickly. That first meet up, he better make it worth it.


MzLady78 said:
Ugh, I guess I could cut him some slack.

I just feel like damn, that's Women 101. If you don't know how to step up and initiate this, I'm giving you the side-eye.
Click to expand...
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
I'm side eyeing, too. BUT, not everyone is used to this way of "dating". Logging on to a computer and messaging people. I fail at online dating. I'm still "old fashioned". Giving him a chance is not so bad, but NINJA also needs to learn quickly. That first meet up, he better make it worth it.
Click to expand...

Funny, he actually just said that he's new to online dating so he's not so smooth.
 
MzLady78 said:
Ugh, I guess I could cut him some slack.

I just feel like damn, that's Women 101. If you don't know how to step up and initiate this, I'm giving you the side-eye.
Click to expand...

lol if you give him your # and he's still asking fooling questions then he's a lost cause. Here's hoping he finally gets it.
 
so dude text me last night around 9ish, he starts off with hey sweetie, whats up? I am like well nothing much getting ready for work in am, he is all like work in morning, me: yeah, him: ok...

Nothing more... what gives... granted i think that i could have said something more engaging than geting ready for work in am, which really wasnt doing anyways, but still... not going to over think this one..

he is scratched off... it was off putting that he texted and didnt call to begin with... :perplexed

ETA: as I typed this out he texted.. thinking of a response and/if want to respond!
 
Last edited:
@MzLady78

I'm new to online dating (been a month) and have noticed that 99% of the guys try to offer their number first. I've had guys email me with the subject "hello" and then nothing but their phone number in the message...delete. I don't take numbers from guys in real life, nothing different online, but I am realizing I must be in the minority here, b/c these guys are doing this like it is commonplace.

I've had a few guys that I've gone back and forth with offer their number. I'll wait a bit and then come back saying when I am free and to give me a call then and I list my number. All have responded that they will call me then, only a few actually have. I just see it as a way to weed out the losers or passive types.

I am furthest along with a guy I am indifferent about, b/c he is doing things the right way (initiating conversations, dates..check ins, etc). Effort is attractive.
 
And the stir event was a bust. It was a happy hour. I had to arrive late so by the time I got there most people had paired off. The few guys left were extremely awkward.

Will try again at a more activity based event.
 
Okay so I've been back in the dating scene for maybe 4 months, and I've been chatting with randoms. So far I've been on one date, and he is mad cool, but I need consistency.... Back to the drawing board...
 
I signed up to POF last weekend and it has been pretty interesting. I met one guy that I have been chatting with since Tuesday. He seems like a decent guy. He had been trying to meet mine in person since second day but heading oot for the holidays so I will catch up with him when in great back.

I am kind of lukewarm with him but trying to stay open to him.

Have a Happy Turkey day Ladies :)
 
Just joined okc last week as a distraction. Been chatting with two super cute normal seeming Haitian men.

A lot of crap to wade through but so far it's fun.
 
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