***Online Dating Support Thread***

This guy messaged me with a distant photo and dark glasses on. His profile states not looking for anything serious but his message presented quite a different story.
I decided to message back asking about this. He said the standard crap about needing to get to know someone blah blah blah....well obviously. He then asks me loads of questions about myself.
I asked him about his photo and did not answer his questions.
He refused to send another photo until we had gotten to know each other.
I bid him goodbye.
 
Dear Black men on OKC,
You can't just contact me in any which way just because we are both black, you know?
All this: hey, hey cutie you are so beautiful, hey we're both black, what's up?:perplexed is not cutting it.
Why don't you read my profile like everyone else does. If you read it, or at least skimmed it, you would see that I do not like one-word messages and promise not to answer to those. Yet you all consistently send me these types (save for maybe 3, who actually got responses).

I like getting messages from you, and I honestly would like it more if you actually took the time to try to get to know me with substance questions instead of all the vapid ones you send.

Thanks.
 
Just got this message...

"Would you consider being in a relationship with a sweet submissive guy who has a foot fetish?"

I cant. I just cant. Who the hell...PINEAPPLES.
 
CarLiTa said:
Dear Black men on OKC,
You can't just contact me in any which way just because we are both black, you know?
All this: hey, hey cutie you are so beautiful, hey we're both black, what's up?:perplexed is not cutting it.
Why don't you read my profile like everyone else does. If you read it, or at least skimmed it, you would see that I do not like one-word messages and promise not to answer to those. Yet you all consistently send me these types (save for maybe 3, who actually got responses).

I like getting messages from you, and I honestly would like it more if you actually took the time to try to get to know me with substance questions instead of all the vapid ones you send.

Thanks.
Click to expand...

CarLiTa
I'm going to cut and paste your entire post and send it all the black men who message me like that. :grin: Then block them :look:
 
Had 2 very nice first dates this weekend. Both very nice, intelligent, successful young men. In the middle of planning another for later this week. I am really starting to question what the heck is wrong with me. I swear I can find something wrong with ANYBODY. And not the obvious deal breakers, but I can totally make something small and stupid a reason to not see, commit, etc with someone.

I've started to take someone's advice (maybe Barbie Socialite??). It's not a bad thing for men to like you! Instead of blowing off men that I know I'm not interested in, I'm still polite, kind, appreciative of thier attention. Even though its not going to go anywhere. It's always good to have people on your side :)
 
went out with another person from OKC last night. I already knew before going that this was likely a no-go. He didn't seem very engaging through messages and not very inquisitive (I need that). But I accepted his date anyway.
It was okay... I think I can make the best of any situation generally, so that's why I say it was okay:look:
For a PhD student he seemed less driven than I would have imagined and a little lost. And not particularly well presented.
The date wasn't well planned, so we had to nix what he'd decided for us and do something else. That's not a dealbreaker, but it didn't help his case.

I would not go out with him again, although he expressed interest in going out again to do what we'd originally planned.

The other guy I went out with Saturday was fun. He's asked me out for this Friday :) And I have another first date on Wednesday. Not particularly excited about that one... Though I have another conversation in the works with someone I'd love to meet soon.
 
I think I've gone into this with my standards a bit high. I feel like my area in general is inhabited by either black guys that look like they have 4 kids and are skipping out on child support, white meth heads, hipsters or Bi guys that want it both ways. There have to be quality men out there that arent already taken but where the heck are they.

Online dating is frustrating.
 
Met a guy on POF....first promising prospect... We went out today and he seems cool so far... Looking forward to another date..
 
prettydarkthing, you're in NY! Sigh:) it's black men galore there:lol: I created a NY acct back when I used to travel to NY frequently for business. Got a lot of messages, but I was a little deficient at this online dating business and never responded to messages. Except one.

Here, the black men are sparse. But I'm meeting other great prospects!
Just got back from an awesome first date. It was lovely. I was cheesing on my way home. I hope he asks me out again.
 
OMG.

I think he's autistic. His speech was staccato.

He talked about his ex wife and the fact that she cheated on him. He talked about this for 15 of the 22 minutes we were on the phone.

This boy is a weirdo. A star is going by his name and he's getting blocked.
 
I usually stick to the Hair & Fitness Forums & find it hilarious that I've been doing the online dating for the last 2 months & just seeing this thread! I thought I could write a book on some of the stuff that I experience until I read some of the posts on here :lachen::lachen:!! Just when I thought about cancelling my membership to my dating site, I got new found hope, LOL! I've only lurked for a day but I will definitely be joining you ladies on this thread!!
 
One more day to go and he will be here!! He said he is excited about this upcoming weekend. We have been video skyping nearly every day, so at least I have confirmed that he looks like his pics :look: We'll be going to church together on Sabbath - how is that for a first date. LOL! Then dinner on Sat night. Trying to decide on a fun activity for Sunday.

Wish me luck!!
 
Wishing you lovely ladies much success and happiness found my true source of love and happiness online, it was frustrating lol but not impossible!!!
 
I've had two stutterers now...both with heavy accents to boot. Conversation was so tedious and I had to stop myself from filling in for them. That and listening really hard so i could understand what they were saying.

Many guys state that they drive on their profiles but when I talk to them on the phone they 'confess' that they don't have one because '__________' (insert excuse).

All these profiles that say they got everything that a woman wants....so I want a man with a low wage job, no car, 3 kids one of which is under a year old, ugly and dress like a thug?

Tired of wasting my evenings talking to these duds.
 
I had a busy last couple few weeks and okc was totally overwhelming for me so I'm just hopping back on today.

Still dating the very first guy I went out with. Going out with him again tomorrow and he also invited me to Derby in May if we are still going out.

Dropped the other guy I had a few dates with. This fool here. I told him I had a lot to do. My mom was hospitalized the prior week and I was behind on my work from shuttling her around. I told him just give me a week and we can pick back up. He tells me he understands. The next day he asks me to go out. Then again two days after that. I told him to kick rocks (okay, okay, I told him we aren't compatible :lol:)

Ended up talking to a guy I had spoken on the phone with like a month ago again. I never heard from him after our conversation, so I figured he wasn't interested. He hits me up telling me how he thinks I have a beautiful personality and how he's sorry for whatever he did to offend me. Come to find out, he texted me a few times and I never got it. I actually liked him based on what I heard on the phone, so that's good.

I had a ton of messages to go through today since I hadn't been on since February. I responded to a few, so we'll see what the next week brings.
 
Quick update....

The airline left his bag :ohwell: Hopefully he should get it by tomorrow. Lawd he is even cuter in person!

We grabbed something quick to eat after he checked into the hotel. Convo flowed easy, lots of laughter, he held all doors etc. So far, so good.
 
bajandoc86 said:
Quick update....

The airline left his bag :ohwell: Hopefully he should get it by tomorrow. Lawd he is even cuter in person!

We grabbed something quick to eat after he checked into the hotel. Convo flowed easy, lots of laughter, he held all doors etc. So far, so good.
Click to expand...

I actually found that the ones that I thought were without a doubt cute in their pictures were better looking in person. The ones I wasn't sure about and needed to go back and look at their pictures were :nono:.

Sent from my iPad using LHCF
 
Shay72 said:
I actually found that the ones that I thought were without a doubt cute in their pictures were better looking in person. The ones I wasn't sure about and needed to go back and look at their pictures were :nono:.

Sent from my iPad using LHCF
Click to expand...

My experience as well:yep:
And the ones who are NOT listed as "responds frequently" (on OKC) are the ones that lots of women find exceptionally attractive and message/approach themselves (instead of waiting for the man to do it). If it ever crosses my mind to message someone, it won't be one of those guys:nono:
 
CarLiTa said:
My experience as well:yep:
And the ones who are NOT listed as "responds frequently" (on OKC) are the ones that lots of women find exceptionally attractive and message/approach themselves (instead of waiting for the man to do it). If it ever crosses my mind to message someone, it won't be one of those guys:nono:
Click to expand...

I wonder about the OKC guys that "responds frequently" AND are exceptionally attractive.... I mean, what the heck? I think, maybe, they're just being polite.
 
Did this ninja just tell me that he wanna own a third world country in 3 years but he lives with his momma....WTF AND WHY ME...
 
Qtee said:
Did this ninja just tell me that he wanna own a third world country in 3 years but he lives with his momma....WTF AND WHY ME...
Click to expand...

:nono:
I went on a date with a guy who said he will be the President of Jamaica in the near future........
 
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