***Online Dating Support Thread***

[PositivelyBeautiful]

my profile has been pretty dead this week... other than a few random stupid "hey whats up" ones... im bored.

eta: i would love to know why every now and again random white chicks pop up in my visitors. do you guys ever get girls on your page? straight girls at that.

They're checking out the competition.

I haven't been back in this thread since the beginning but I just wanted to relay what happened to me in these last few months.

A few months ago I met a guy online. He sent me a private message saying he wanted to talk to me. He wasn't my type but I responded anyway. We started talking through IM and we had a lot in common and I found him really funny. After a while we started texting every day, we called each other every night and we were planning to meet up. Then two days before we were supposed to meet up he disappeared. No message, nothing. Luckily for me I hadn't booked my tickets to visit him (he lived in another city) and when I didn't hear from him I decided to just leave him be, but I was pissed. We were talking for two months, and I know that isn't a long time but I felt disappointed. I have a years subscription to eharmony but I deleted my pics and told them that I didn't want them to send me any new matches (once you buy a years subscription you can't cancel properly) and I took a bit of a break.

Anywho, a few weeks ago I decided that there was no point in me wasting my subscription and decided to get back up online. I posted my pics again and decided to not take anything too seriously. But it's been pretty hard because recently I've been contacted by some amazing guys. I was first contacted by an Asian corporate lawyer who's a great guy and we still talk daily. Then I was contacted by a white guy who own's his own dental practice. I'm meeting up with him when I go back home this weekend and I'm looking forward to seeing how things go. I was also contacted by a black corporate lawyer. And he really does seem like the total package. He's smart, funny, ambitious, handsome. We have the same values. He calls me twice a day every day and texts me all day. We went on a date on Saturday and it was honestly the best first date I've ever had. We gel really well and he treated me like a princess. On our date I realised that I haven't been on a date with a real man for a long time. It's one day at a time but it sure looks promising at the moment.

To top it all off, the fool that disappeared on me sent me a text message on Monday. Saying something like 'hey, i hope you're ok and you haven't forgotten me'. I didn't even reply.

So online dating really has been up and down for me. But I'm happy with how things are going now. There are jerks and good guys out there like there are IRL. Good luck ladies!

 

[sky_blu]

.............................

 

[dannie]

I cant stand people sometimes. This fool on match hits me up but on his profile he likes everyone EXCEPT black women.

So I ask him what the hell is he talking to me for then and he says "oh I'm sorry, I thought you were latina".

Not only are you close minded, you also cant read because it says "black" right on my page next to my pictures fool!

Seems that be the first thing he looked at, since race is so important these days

 

[EllePixie]

I cant stand people sometimes. This fool on match hits me up but on his profile he likes everyone EXCEPT black women.

So I ask him what the hell is he talking to me for then and he says "oh I'm sorry, I thought you were latina".

Not only are you close minded, you also cant read because it says "black" right on my page next to my pictures fool!

Seems that be the first thing he looked at, since race is so important these days

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW.

 

[nappystorm]

I cant stand people sometimes. This fool on match hits me up but on his profile he likes everyone EXCEPT black women.

So I ask him what the hell is he talking to me for then and he says "oh I'm sorry, I thought you were latina".

Not only are you close minded, you also cant read because it says "black" right on my page next to my pictures fool!

Seems that be the first thing he looked at, since race is so important these days

 

[soft&thin]

I've been on pof for about a yr and haven't caught anything close to decent but I have made a few chat buddies.One of them actually told me today ."Why do women on pof fool themselves into thinking that not every man on pof wants sex every man is here for sex" straight from the *&%^$ mouth lol

 

[MizzBrown]

I have edited my email options so that you must write 50 characters or more. So sick and tired of getting dumb emails saying "hey sexy" "hi, how are you?" "what's good ma?"

No one can initiate a decent email conversation. And I've never seen so many people who CANNOT SPELL!!! That iritates me. Simple words too. I automatically delete.

 

[mischka]

I ignored everyone that messaged me this week and deleted the summary off my profile which is going to ensure nobody but dummies message me. I should disable my profile for awhile. (I feel bad ignoring people... but I just have nothing to say to these stupid messages and to these profiles that are devoid of personality.)

I have edited my email options so that you must write 50 characters or more. So sick and tired of getting dumb emails saying "hey sexy" "hi, how are you?" "what's good ma?"

Ahhhhhhhhhh why doesn't okcupid have this option

 

[Butterfly08]

I have edited my email options so that you must write 50 characters or more. So sick and tired of getting dumb emails saying "hey sexy" "hi, how are you?" "what's good ma?"

No one can initiate a decent email conversation. And I've never seen so many people who CANNOT SPELL!!! That iritates me. Simple words too. I automatically delete.

I never respond to messages full of typos. If you can't spell "the" then there is no reason for us to go any further.


Sent from my iPod touch using LHCF

 

[mischka]

If you hide someone on okc, does that stop them showing up in your quickmatch emails? Some 30 year old dude from Tennessee keeps rating my profile over and over, dude I know it's you, you're in every bunch and it appears right after you visited my page

 

[Britt]

I'm starting to feel like i'm wasting my time online. I hardly see someone that I'm attracted to. I've spoken to a few people so far but nothing has come of it. I promised that I would leave my profile up for a few months at least tho. I have nothing to lose.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I've been on pof for about a yr and haven't caught anything close to decent but I have made a few chat buddies.One of them actually told me today ."Why do women on pof fool themselves into thinking that not every man on pof wants sex every man is here for sex" straight from the *&%^$ mouth lol

I joined POF this week and I'm getting a lot of messages and request for meetings but no one has caught my eye. Well yes men want sex, but don't manipulate a woman into thinking that you are actually looking for a long-term relationship and/or marriage. Don't waste my time.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I cant stand people sometimes. This fool on match hits me up but on his profile he likes everyone EXCEPT black women.

So I ask him what the hell is he talking to me for then and he says "oh I'm sorry, I thought you were latina".

Not only are you close minded, you also cant read because it says "black" right on my page next to my pictures fool!

Seems that be the first thing he looked at, since race is so important these days

Sounds like he was trying to be insulting.

 

[LifeafterLHCF]

Im trying this again I'm recreating a few accounts.I really wish I had more spending money so I could afford to upgrade and do the paid sites a bit more.This for me is so sad that I have to spend so much to possible make a male friend.

 

[mischka]

So I FINALLY went ahead and made a pof page. I copied text from the article I'm reading for my hw into the summary, and picked the most ridiculous answers for mandatory questions I didn't want to answer. (When it made me write something for 'profession' I put 'drinker of water.')

By the time I finished with that little 30 question "chemistry test" and proceeded to my profile, I already had a message wtf? I don't even know how to navigate the site yet

 

[mischka]

Omg, this dude is messaging me and I'm giving him the worst time ever. I'm a horrible person.

Him: Hey how you doin my name is Reggie I like your profile I think you are Beautiful can I talk to you
Him: Hey how you doin
Me: how can you like my profile
Me: nothings on it lol
Him: well you have a nice pic up LOL
Him: I would like a chance to get to know you
Him: can I tell you alittle about me Me: sure
Him: okay I stay in =-=-=-=-I have my own apartment no kids I have a car
Him: I have a good job I work in Manufacturing I inspect car parts
Him: right now I'm inspecting parts for the New Chevy Malibu
Him: I like to go to nice resturants to the movies play pool bowl go to =-=-=-games I also like to cook
Him: Tell me what do you like to do for fun ?
Me: wait i have a question first
Me: or an observation
Me: do you know most guys start out conversation by saying "i have a job and a car and no kids" lol
Me: what is that, lets just get that out the way up front?
Me: how come you dont have any kids?
Him: because I'm a Lucky Man LOL !!!!!
Me: lol
Him: what do you like to do for fun ?
Me: I DONT LIKE TO HAVE FUN OMG
Me: lol
Me: im giving you a hard time to tell you the truth
Me: its just why yall all gotta say the exact same ****?
Me: its like having the same conversation over and over again
Him: um honestly this our convo i can't speak for other convos you've had Me: yeah i know
Me: im sure you wouldnt know bc you probably dont have guys messaging you
Me: but you can take my word for it, its like the conversations all follow the exact same script
Me: dont you think thats kind of insulting?
Him: no as long as they come correct and talk to you like a Lady no i don't think its insulting
Me: oh ok
Him: maybe you've heard this one too what are you looking for ?
Me: lol
Me: how come you didnt ask me about my home and car and work though?
Him: I was gong to get to that I only got to ask 1 question to you
Me: lol
Me: you think im a jerk dont you
Him: I don't know you yet so i don't know your personality
Me: im a terrible person, reggie
Me: im also a little crazy
Him: OKaaaaay ....... are you sure ?
Me: yeah pretty sure
Me: im not a psychopath or anything but you know

I have no sympathy for dudes who complain about the type of women they mess with and women are crazy and whatever else. because i'm clearly acting like a b8tch to him AND I TOLD HIM I WAS CRAZY and the conversation continued for awhile after that. he was still interested in pursuing whatever he was pursuing. and then if i really were to go out with him and exhibit this same sort of behavior, i'd be all kinds of crazy b8tches and whatever else omg lol

 

[lushcoils]

This is why I turn my IM off on pof and okcupid..to keep most of the thugs and creepers away.

 

[SqrpioQutie]

Omg, this dude is messaging me and I'm giving him the worst time ever. I'm a horrible person.



I have no sympathy for dudes who complain about the type of women they mess with and women are crazy and whatever else. because i'm clearly acting like a b8tch to him AND I TOLD HIM I WAS CRAZY and the conversation continued for awhile after that. he was still interested in pursuing whatever he was pursuing. and then if i really were to go out with him and exhibit this same sort of behavior, i'd be all kinds of crazy b8tches and whatever else omg lol

i do that... to an extent.... i can be a straight up b on the im (because i clearly tell them that i hate the im feature and the proceed to try to use it anyway)... so, to me, they're asking for it....

i also had one guy tell me the other day, after he already pissed me off using the im, that i only told him i wasn't interested in him because he said he was african... no, i was interested in him because i wasn't attracted to him but he wouldn't accept that... whatev....

the only thing the im confirms for me is whether or not they have a strong command of the english language... i have no desire to be stuck on a screen on the computer when more often than not i'm on the computer because i'm multi-tasking...

 

[Zuleika]

Deleted...

 

[mischka]

look at the userpic... what's up with dude? one is from okc, the other is from pof like 2 days apart and he doesnt realize im the same person. i'm pretty sure i've got messages from this guy in the past too

 

[mischka]

Him: ok is worth us contibue talkin or shall I just stop now ?
Him: continue
Me: that depends
Me: are those typos caused by one handed typing
Him: yes I can only type w/ 1 hand was born w/ a birth defect that I have very lil movement in my right hand
Me: oh well now i feel like an 8sshole

online dating is HILARRRRRRIOUS

 

[SqrpioQutie]

online dating is HILARRRRRRIOUS

open mouth, insert foot.... i've been there sooooooooooooooooooooooooo many times... lol

 

[MizzBrown]

I think I finally caught a bass!

He asked to exchange personal emails or phone numbers. Whatever I felt comfortable with.

So after I googled my email addy to see what info came up, I proceeded to delete my info off Spokeo in case he got too nosy, then gave him my email.

 

[MizzBrown]

I think a lot of people just fish to see what they can pull up online. Like throw bait to see if people will respond to them to satisfy their curiosity.

Because I've had guys who will send me a message, I'll be interested and respond back all happy as hell that the dude is finally attractive and meets my criteria on paper, then they don't respond back.

Like they were just seeing if I WOULD actually respond back.

 

[mischka]

Especially on POF. I don't like POF, it feels like a messy free for all. And the guys there seem to have an even worse habit of copying and pasting messages, probably because the way the site is set up it's mostly just for viewing the pictures and reading the profile is an afterthought. So I get a lot of prepackaged bs messages "my name is blah blah I'm 27 and I work at the blahblah and I live blahblah" like basically just seeing a chick, she's cute, I'm gonna make myself known to her.

I get so many filler messages that it's hard to keep up with the guys I'm actually talking to so I end up not even responding how I normally would and eventually forgetting about the conversation altogether.

 

[AimWard]

Arrrrgah!!! I just came across my 1st Nigerian scammer on match.com Apparently this is quite prevalent on the site. Anywho, this guy was F-I-N-E in the pics. I should have known better when he was acting all funny about meeting up or even exchanging cell numbers. We chatted via yahoo messenger (which seemed kinda odd since I haven't used messenger in like 7 years) and exchanged a few e-mails over the last 2 weeks or so. Everything we know about each other is still pretty standard and basic. The stuff you can find in almost any online profile. No last names and I used a separate anonymous e-mail addy specifically for dating websites. There were some red flags like both his parents being dead, him being an engineer, him wearing a rosary in one of his pics but stating he was a non denominational Christian, etc, etc, etc. I took all these flags into consideration and continued to proceed with caution and THANK GOD I did. I checked my e-mail this morning and I get this from him:

"I went to bed last night with a vision of you next to me. I slept like a baby all night, because I was not feeling alone.
When I awoke this morning to see if it was real or if it was a dream, realty hit me that it was only a dream. Very soon, I know that you will be right next me, and that I will not have to dream of it again because you will be right there so we can hold, hug and squeeze each other tight. My love, I long to be there with you so I can help build you and support you, so that we can accomplish a whole lot together as a couple..."


I was like WTF? Hommie didn't even want to talk on the phone and now he's longing and having visions of me beside him? Ninja, please!!! I copy and pasted that mess into google and guess what, it's not only a Nigerian Scam, it's Russian and German as well. I then extrapolated his IP address from his e-mails and guess where they originate from... You give up? Lagos, Nigeria.
I reported him to match.com. Never again! My gut instinct was right from the jump.

 

[NYAmicas]

look at the userpic... what's up with dude? one is from okc, the other is from pof like 2 days apart and he doesnt realize im the same person. i'm pretty sure i've got messages from this guy in the past too

lmao. That happened to me on OKC & POF as well. When he hit me up on POF I remembered him from OK, (my pic was kind of obscured on POF so I can understand why he didnt recognize me) and laughed about it. I went out with him on one date which was cool but I wasnt attracted to him.

 

[Raspberry]

online dating is HILARRRRRRIOUS

that was hysterical.

 

[mischka]

Arrrrgah!!! I just came across my 1st Nigerian scammer on match.com Apparently this is quite prevalent on the site. Anywho, this guy was F-I-N-E in the pics. I should have known better when he was acting all funny about meeting up or even exchanging cell numbers. We chatted via yahoo messenger (which seemed kinda odd since I haven't used messenger in like 7 years) and exchanged a few e-mails over the last 2 weeks or so. Everything we know about each other is still pretty standard and basic. The stuff you can find in almost any online profile. No last names and I used a separate anonymous e-mail addy specifically for dating websites. There were some red flags like both his parents being dead, him being an engineer, him wearing a rosary in one of his pics but stating he was a non denominational Christian, etc, etc, etc. I took all these flags into consideration and continued to proceed with caution and THANK GOD I did. I checked my e-mail this morning and I get this from him:

"I went to bed last night with a vision of you next to me. I slept like a baby all night, because I was not feeling alone.
When I awoke this morning to see if it was real or if it was a dream, realty hit me that it was only a dream. Very soon, I know that you will be right next me, and that I will not have to dream of it again because you will be right there so we can hold, hug and squeeze each other tight. My love, I long to be there with you so I can help build you and support you, so that we can accomplish a whole lot together as a couple..."


I was like WTF? Hommie didn't even want to talk on the phone and now he's longing and having visions of me beside him? Ninja, please!!! I copy and pasted that mess into google and guess what, it's not only a Nigerian Scam, it's Russian and German as well. I then extrapolated his IP address from his e-mails and guess where they originate from... You give up? Lagos, Nigeria.
I reported him to match.com. Never again! My gut instinct was right from the jump.

Oh wowwwwwww... kudos to your for thinking to google it, idk if even i would have thought of that and i am the google stalking queen

 

[AimWard]

Oh wowwwwwww... kudos to your for thinking to google it, idk if even i would have thought of that and i am the google stalking queen

I wouldn't have thought to google it either but something seemed off from the start. I was just blinded by those fine pics he had up. For instance:

1. Fine as hell in his pics, but he did not want to meet any time soon or talk on the phone (not the attitude of fine arse man that wants to get to know me).
2. I asked him what part of the city he lived in and he said downtown. This particular city has no downtown
3. Said he was a structural engineer that did freelance work, but could not tell me exactly where he was freelancing at.
4. Both his parents are dead and he has no siblings (just didn't sound right, thought I heard something like this on NBC Dateline).
5. Said he was a non denominational Christian but had a rosary on in one of his pics
6. I mentioned I was looking to purchase a condo and he says, "wow, the market is bad right now." WTH? All these foreclosures. It's totally a buyers market and he's a structural engineer, he should know, this.

I kept talking to him and writing these things off as little things that weren't deal breakers. But when I read that bogus arse love letter, it became clear as day to me.

Be safe ladies (online or off). You don't have to be desperate and pitiful to get caught in something like this. I am a very tech savvy and smart person who has no problem pulling men. I just wanted to try a different avenue and I attracted a scammer. You know what they say, if it smells like a rat...