MARRIAGE need your opinions

[Foxglove]

I started typing something out but I'll delete it. Seems like you had your mind made up from the beginning and nothing anybody says (even the happily married people) will convince you that perhaps there are different routes and obviously both work

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

OP is 22 ... oh.

Continue.

 

[summerof1990]

OP is 22 ... oh.

Continue.

22 is not young lol
it's old enough to at least start THINKING about being with someone forever if you're not with them yet and kids

 

[The Girl]

Typed two replies and stopped...wth did I wake up to?

 

[summerof1990]

Typed two replies and stopp

so why keep going lol

 

[jerseyhaircare]

Way too early in the morning for such silliness.

 

[Ogoma]

OP is 22 ... oh.

Continue.

22 is too old to be this, to put it nicely, naive. At 22, I was living on my own in a foreign country and managing my life. We should stop lowering expectations.

 

[MrsJaiDiva]

im not young im 22
yes marriage is an accomplishment
and club and bar is not my thing.

Am I being punked? Are you taking the mick??

 

[summerof1990]

22 is too old to be this, to put it nicely, naive. At 22, I was living on my own in a foreign country and managing my life. We should stop lowering expectations.

I'm not naive.
And I have my own stuff and don't have to ask for anything :shrug:

 

[summerof1990]

Am I being punked? Are you taking the mick??

nah..........

 

[summerof1990]

Way too early in the morning for such silliness.

i so agree

 

[cyrealla]

thread to watch...

 

[MrsJaiDiva]

I'm not naive.
And I have my own stuff and don't have to ask for anything :shrug:

Own stuff...? Are you living on your own? Firmly established in your career? BA, and or Masters Degree? Checking AND savings account, with more than a few thousand stashed? How much of the World have you seen?

 

[OhmyKimB]

I only came in to say at 22 I wanted to be married. I wasn't into clubs and bars.



And now at 26 I have little interest in being bothered by another person. I'm extremely happy to not be married. I feel like marriage is a passing feeling. In the sense that I still want to but I realize what it really is. The weight of the commitment. Whereas when I was 22 it seemed to just be a more permanent boyfriend.

 

[gabulldawg]

they wouldn't lie. and
i asked the guys too
im not just going to let them off easily without my approval.lol
i asked what made them want to marry them since men that are younger than 25 don't want that usually.
they all gave their reasons one said he was ready (he's a good guy raised well)
other one was ready because he was missing a key woman in his life. which is his mom. and my besty is really sweet and lively. hard to find this in my generation SO I SEE WHY HE MARRIED HER POINT BLANK

With all due respect to them, either those men are fools, narcissists/overly confident, or are just plain lucky. Yeah if you're telling me they never ONCE discussed marriage and they just went out and bought rings. Did they even ask for the father's blessing?

 

[Layluh]

I brought it up with my husband. But it was more like "look listen, this is what I want. Do you want it too? If not, kick rocks" After that, it was effortless.

 

[Mortons]

I only came in to say at 22 I wanted to be married. I wasn't into clubs and bars.

And now at 26 I have little interest in being bothered by another person. I'm extremely happy to not be married. I feel like marriage is a passing feeling. In the sense that I still want to but I realize what it really is. The weight of the commitment. Whereas when I was 22 it seemed to just be a more permanent boyfriend.

This is me just a year younger than you. I thought I was ready but ain't no way.

 

[summerof1990]

Own stuff...? Are you living on your own? Firmly established in your career? BA, and or Masters Degree? Checking AND savings account, with more than a few thousand stashed? How much of the World have you seen?

LMAO, you want to add what brand is my car and my income tax info also lol
but yea
i stated i'm established without having to ask for anything from anyone EVER.
and i travel a lot besides to my home country and plan on doing it more often

 

[summerof1990]

I brought it up with my husband. But it was more like "look listen, this is what I want. Do you want it too? If not, kick rocks" After that, it was effortless.

lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
why is it that most of you guys had to set a reminder
did you ask him what took him so long i want to know that answer too.
was he afraid?

 

[summerof1990]

we can agree to disagree guys had fun
Goodday :waves:

 

[Honey Bee]

22 is too old to be this, to put it nicely, naive. At 22, I was living on my own in a foreign country and managing my life. We should stop lowering expectations.

@Ogoma,

 

[summerof1990]

@Ogoma,

exactly women have no expectations these days

 

[Kurlee]

OP what you are proposing is very juvenile. In addition to discussing what you both want out of the relationship, there are important topics that are best discussed early on.

I wish you all the best.

I don't understand what is wrong with PLANNING a future or discussing what you want before you waste your time. What if you and the person have different expectations, timelines, values? What if you guys are both studying (grad/professional school)? What if there is money to be saved or things to get in order before marriage? You HAVE to communicate instead of trying to prove that some man is so in love with you that he blindly chose you without even discussing the nitty gritty. Waiting until engagement to talk is far too late IMO.

 

[MrsJaiDiva]

lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
why is it that most of you guys had to set a reminder
did you ask him what took him so long i want to know that answer too.
was he afraid?

If you can't have an adult conversation with a man, and you expect him to magically read your mind and surprise you with the perfect 2ct solitaire....this ain't for you hunny.

Good luck, and God Bless chile!

 

[Kurlee]

boss lol.
if he doesn't ask then i will feel im not worth is so i'll just move on it if never happens i'll just assume im not either pretty enough for a man to be interested for a life long commit or my personality is not good enough

the way you are framing the proposal, it comes across as a validation thing, more than a plan a life together thing.

 

[EverythingOldIsNew]

I want y'all to use the search feature when y'all see a post that make you go "say what ?"

 

[Lurkee]

OP is 22 ... oh.

Continue.

22 is too old to be this, to put it nicely, naive. At 22, I was living on my own in a foreign country and managing my life. We should stop lowering expectations.

I think from the thread of when people said the age they got married, we can conclude and say there is no "right" age across the board. Everyone feels ready differently. However, OP's idea of a proposal is very funny.

22 is not that young IMO. 22 is definitely young adult category not necessarily naive child.

Own stuff...? Are you living on your own? Firmly established in your career? BA, and or Masters Degree? Checking AND savings account, with more than a few thousand stashed? How much of the World have you seen?

MrsJaiDiva
Lots of 22 year old have all of these. Age is not directly related to experience. If you even raise the age to 30, not everyone will have accomplished your list.

 

[Zaynab]

Jesus be some common sense.

Why are y'all entertaining this?

I have no idea. I couldn't get past the text talk 'u' dialogue

Sent from yacht with Beyonce & Blue

 

[Zaynab]

I want y'all to use the search feature when y'all see a post that make you go "say what ?"

I'm surprised people took the time to reply

Sent from yacht with Beyonce & Blue

 

[Southernbella.]

I want y'all to use the search feature when y'all see a post that make you go "say what ?"

I didn't know there was a history. I will definitely do this in the future.

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using LHCF