"It's Okay To Be Single"...Is That Just Something Unhappy Single Ppl Say??

[ProfectivGirl]

I have always had an issue when my single friends would say "girl it's okay to be single, enjoy your single life" and all that other stuff. Well I noticed married people aren't saying that, the ones who have found a true companion aren't going around telling singles to stay single which leads me to think that this phrase "its okay to be single" is only said to make single people that can't find anyone, feel better about their situation. I am single now and I will say I enjoyed it more when I was in a relationship, so I don't understand why people try and make it seem like being single is hotter than sliced bread...what happened to family? Marriage? Love? Companionship? Parrnership? Thoughts anyone?

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[janiebaby]

Lack of anything else to say when they feel that something needs to be said...

Wait, I read that wrong...in my experience most of the people who say "its okay to be single" are married then I look at them like

 

[Etherealsmile]

I have always had an issue when my single friends would say "girl it's okay to be single, enjoy your single life" and all that other stuff. Well I noticed married people aren't saying that, the ones who have found a true companion aren't going around telling singles to stay single which leads me to think that this phrase "its okay to be single" is only said to make single people that can't find anyone, feel better about their situation. I am single now and I will say I enjoyed it more when I was in a relationship, so I don't understand why people try and make it seem like being single is hotter than sliced bread...what happened to family? Marriage? Love? Companionship? Parrnership? Thoughts anyone?

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@ the highlighted

I'll say it again, not every single woman is hard pressed to find a man

Some women really do enjoy being single (me). If you love being in a relationship, that's great! but don't project those feelings on other single women because not every single woman desires to be in a relationship, let alone marriage and kids

 

[Poohbear]

ProfectivGirl - I think the single friends say that because they simply enjoy meeting, dating, kicking it, or hooking up with different men. Some single women may not care to find "the one" and love the single life.

But I'm a one man woman. I don't enjoy that, and it looks like you don't either. And your friends apparently do not understand that. Some may think it's cool, makes them look good, or shows that they can pick up several men, but I don't care nor want to be known for being with several men in casual relationships.

Now some of your single friends may be unhappy, but that's if they are hoping for a serious relationship with a man that could possibly lead to marriage and it's not happening for them.

 

[ProfectivGirl]

@ the highlighted

I'll say it again, not every single woman is hard pressed to find a man

Some women really do enjoy being single (me). If you love being in a relationship, that's great! but don't project those feelings on other single women because not every single woman desires to be in a relationship, let alone marriage and kids

And I agree not every single woman wants a relationship, and I have no intentions of projecting my feelings onto other single women, but I am actually finding single women projecting their feelings onto me. Its just good to know others' opinions..and frankly to see if I'm the only single person that still believes in marriage lol jkjk
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[ProfectivGirl]

ProfectivGirl - I think the single friends say that because they simply enjoy meeting, dating, kicking it, or hooking up with different men. Some single women may not care to find "the one" and love the single life.

But I'm a one man woman. I don't enjoy that, and it looks like you don't either. And your friends apparently do not understand that. Some may think it's cool, makes them look good, or shows that they can pick up several men, but I don't care nor want to be known for being with several men in casual relationships.

Now some of your single friends may be unhappy, but that's if they are hoping for a serious relationship with a man that could possibly lead to marriage and it's not happening for them.

You hit that nail right on the head girl! I am glad i'm not alone in this lol
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[Victorian]

When someone is happy where they are, single or coupled, they will naturally expect that others will be happy in the same situation. When you have joy, you want to spread it and tell others how to get it. So happy married people will tell you marriage is the best and everyone should aspire to it. Happy single people will laud the joys of single freedom. Unhappy people will tell you to do the opposite of what they are doing, in order to spare someone else the unhappiness.

*Note: balanced, normal people exhibit this behavior. Catty, evil people will try to sabotage your happiness no matter what

 

[Cherokee-n-Black]

I have always had an issue when my single friends would say "girl it's okay to be single, enjoy your single life" and all that other stuff. Well I noticed married people aren't saying that, the ones who have found a true companion aren't going around telling singles to stay single which leads me to think that this phrase "its okay to be single" is only said to make single people that can't find anyone, feel better about their situation. I am single now and I will say I enjoyed it more when I was in a relationship, so I don't understand why people try and make it seem like being single is hotter than sliced bread...what happened to family? Marriage? Love? Companionship? Parrnership? Thoughts anyone?

Sent from My Android

I'm actually surprised more married people aren't saying that. I'm married, and I do think it's okay to be single and enjoy your single life. The reason being, once you are married, everything changes. Things you would do at the drop of a hat now have to be planned out and communicated to your partner. Once you add kids in the mix, there are always extra steps involved in everything you do, whether it's arranging to bring them along or get a sitter. Decisions have to be made with someone else in mind. I'm not saying it's bad to be married, but these are all things that single women don't have to factor in when deciding, for example, what they are doing after work.

There is also a certain degree of romance in the unknown, that whole "new love" thing with the high-high's (and, unfortunately the low-lows). Marriage offers stability and security, but you really can't recreate the "new relationship" vibe that is so exciting. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely high's within a marriage, but it's just not the "new relationship" high, and you do sometimes miss it, especially after watching a rom-com or a scenario of lovers meeting for the first time. Single women also don't have to share a bedroom/kitchen/bathroom with a man--which is a whoooole other thing! Wars have been fought over toilet seats, dishes in the sink, and clothes on the floor! So ENJOY!

 

[mischka]

I definitely prefer being single (and in fact have a problem with commitment) and pretty much most men think it's more than ok to be single as well. Just because a lot of women fake the funk that doesn't mean it's never true.

 

[MixedBerry]

Uh, people say it cause its true! Its very ok and FUN! It all depends on state of mind.

Married folks cant say it cause they are married.

 

[MixedBerry]

I'm actually surprised more married people aren't saying that. I'm married, and I do think it's okay to be single and enjoy your single life. The reason being, once you are married, everything changes. Things you would do at the drop of a hat now have to be planned out and communicated to your partner. Once you add kids in the mix, there are always extra steps involved in everything you do, whether it's arranging to bring them along or get a sitter. Decisions have to be made with someone else in mind. I'm not saying it's bad to be married, but these are all things that single women don't have to factor in when deciding, for example, what they are doing after work.

There is also a certain degree of romance in the unknown, that whole "new love" thing with the high-high's (and, unfortunately the low-lows). Marriage offers stability and security, but you really can't recreate the "new relationship" vibe that is so exciting. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely high's within a marriage, but it's just not the "new relationship" high, and you do sometimes miss it, especially after watching a rom-com or a scenario of lovers meeting for the first time. Single women also don't have to share a bedroom/kitchen/bathroom with a man--which is a whoooole other thing! Wars have been fought over toilet seats, dishes in the sink, and clothes on the floor! So ENJOY!

as the kids say +1 but times it by a gazillion!

 

[hothair]

People tell you things from their own perspective. For some it "is" ok to be single. When I was dating and in between boyfriends mostly I was very happy to be by myself, I enjoyed being out and having the freedom to flirt, dress and enjoy my femininity without thinking of anyone else. So yes, sometimes it is okay to be single.

 

[TrueToHair]

.........................

 

[MixedBerry]

I love this thread! Im really enjoying reading all the responses!

 

[*5+5]

I usually hear this statement from married peoplethat have been married awhile. I'm the youngest person on the totem pole at work and all the married people (all races) tell me to take my time and enjoy being single.

 

[Do_Si_Dos]

I usually hear this statement from married peoplethat have been married awhile. I'm the youngest person on the totem pole at work and all the married people (all races) tell me to take my time and enjoy being single.

I hear this a lot from my younger married friends. My older married relatives, feel like marriage should be have happened for me like yesterday!They also say, everybody needs someone.

Personally, I have really enjoyed my single years, but I am very ready to start a new chapter in my life. In life there are seasons, and I pray my season of singleness will be ending very soon. If not, I will continue to enjoy it.

 

[ThickHair]

I usually hear this from married but miserable people. Happily married people just tell me to enjoy life.

 

[MD_Lady]

I don't think saying it's okay to be single is the same as telling someone they should remain single. If anything, I think this statement is a response to those who treat a woman like there's something wrong with her if she's not married.

 

[ChasingBliss]

"It's ok to be single" should be amended to "Take advantage of being single." If you waste your single years bemoaning "being alone," you'll miss out on all the things that are better (and easier) to do independently. Use your single time wisely.

Even though I love being in a monogomous relationship. I love this post. Well said. This is what my mom used to tell me when I would moan about being unattached.

 

[Dreamer48]

OP, it sounds like you're set on being married and see that status as being better than living the single life. It seems like you've been looking and may be slightly frustrated with the search. Sometimes statements that speak to our relationship status can unintentionally be hurtful or annoying when we're not happy with our current status.

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

As a woman currently in a relationship, I'll tell a single woman that there's absolutely nothing wrong with being single. I agree with MD_Lady. It's in response to those that act like 1. Being single is the worst thing for a woman (Old Maid syndrome) or 2. It's better to have something than nothing (I Gotta Man syndrome.)

When I was single, it was by choice because I didn't believe in getting down with any and everything. Love is worth the wait and I knew that I knew my worth. It's not something that can be rushed. I didn't want one at any/all cost.

I'm in a relationship now and I'm very happy. For me personally, too many people go through the "I, Me, My's" and are too selfish to be in a relationship. There has to be balance, understanding, commitment, love, friendship, patience, equality, and such. It takes work and there are alot of lazy people that don't want to move past the fresh phase... so they yearn to be single when the passionate flames dwindle down to dying embers.... or when they realize that the diamond they thought they had was really a bird turd....but that's another post entirely.

 

[Twinspired]

I think saying its ok to be single means just that. It's ok to be single. It's ok to be married.

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[LadyPaniolo]

I tell every single girl who will stand still long enough to SAVOR being single. Enjoy it, seriously. You will never be so free again, once you marry and/or have children.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I have always had an issue when my single friends would say "girl it's okay to be single, enjoy your single life" and all that other stuff. Well I noticed married people aren't saying that, the ones who have found a true companion aren't going around telling singles to stay single which leads me to think that this phrase "its okay to be single" is only said to make single people that can't find anyone, feel better about their situation. I am single now and I will say I enjoyed it more when I was in a relationship, so I don't understand why people try and make it seem like being single is hotter than sliced bread...what happened to family? Marriage? Love? Companionship? Parrnership? Thoughts anyone?

Sent from My Android

It's probably not a wise thing for a married person to encourage people to live in the single life ... sounds like the making of a very angry spouse (lol) Especially if it was a married man saying it.

 

[ladysaraii]

I take it as, its ok to be single, dont hop in a relationship just to be in a relationship. Also the grass isnt always greener on the other side

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

"It's ok to be single" should be amended to "Take advantage of being single." If you waste your single years bemoaning "being alone," you'll miss out on all the things that are better (and easier) to do independently. Use your single time wisely.

^^^
This

 

[softblackcotton]

I've been single so long, practically my whole life, that I don't think I could transition into incorporating a serious relationship into my life. One girl at my job forfeited going to Spain for a year, because she didn't want to leave her boyfriend(now her husband). Sucks I would have gone, *** love. I am comfortable being single.I love getting up doing things at the drop of a dime. I am planning to leave this country next year! Couldn't do that if I were boo'd up! Plus I don't like children at all. So yeah "It's okay to be single, single doesn't mean lonely, I have a good amount of friends and tons of acquaintances.

 

[softblackcotton]

double posted.

 

[drappedup]

Nope, I definitely am comfortable being single. I turn down guys who want to make me their "boo" and all that regularly. Sometimes I just like focusing on me and doing me! I am personally a detached, independent type of person, so it doesn't work in a relationship sometimes since I tend to feel suffocated easily. But yeah, it is most definitely possible to be single and content.

 

[itsjusthair88]

hey, to each her own...I've been serious with someone and I've been completely single and they're both what you make 'em...I enjoy my single time but I'm sure when the right man comes along, I'll enjoy being with him too...