It's Easier to be Natural If...

[An_Original_Copy]

It seems to me that the only time that 4a/b hair is accepted is when it's long. If it's a short 'fro then the Black men where I'm from will dismiss you, but when a woman has kinky, but long hair then it's "ok".

 

[Crackers Phinn]

I think if you go natural to prove a point you've missed the boat. You should be natural because you want to and you should relax if you want to.

I agree 100% with this.
Last year when I was about 7-8 months into my transition, there was a two week period where quite a few women on this board who were at the same point as me all went back to relaxing.

I was a little sad, for losing my 'partners in crime', so to speak, but I realized that they needed to do what worked for them. I still frequent their albums to see their progress and I don't hold any grudges. But I know some of those folks got nasty comments in their fotkis about 'giving up'. It's that kind of attitude that bothers me.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Forgive me, but an earlier poster said she thinks looser-curled-hair gives "bonus points" to darker-skinned ladies. I'm sure there are women who believe that. In this vein, I think some people use straight hair as a crutch; it gives them "points" and masks other areas where they may be insecure {weight, complexion, height, facial features, class, etc}.

That was me.

Here's the thing. Consider this: Ananda Lewis, Chili from TLC, Tatiana Ali, Kelis, Rachel True. Let's be really real here, Are these women known for their good looks/talent or for their hair? I don't think any of them would would get looked at twice if their hair wasn't outside the 'expectations' of 'typical' (i.e., permed or kinky) black girl hair.

I'm not saying that it's right or wrong. I'm just saying that 'it is'.

 

[UmSumayyah]

See, I live in Southern California and my perception is that a toned body trumps a hairstyle any day.

 

[UmSumayyah]

"Is it possible that the amount of liberation or fullfillment in being natural varies by hair texture and others' reactions to it? That women who have kinkier hair textures have a more emotionally challenging 'natural journey' than others."

I think that is probably true for some people, but not a guarantee for everyone. I know a young lady with 3b/c hair who does NOT think it is beautiful, no matter what anyone says. She is natural, her mom doesn't do relaxers. Her mom was telling me that she looks at her little sister's hair and sighs, wishing her hair were like that. Lil sis, from what I can see, is straight 3c. I asked her mom why she said that, because if hair type is her problem, her curl is looser.

Her mom said it doesn't matter because it's all in her head. A few years of school in which nearly all the girls had type 1 hair and made fun of hers had messed up her mind. No telling when she'll get over it.

 

[pretty_nappy_hair]

"See, I live in Southern California and my perception is that a toned body trumps a hairstyle any day."

I 100% agree with this.

 

[hotshot]

That was me.

Here's the thing. Consider this: Ananda Lewis, Chili from TLC, Tatiana Ali, Kelis, Rachel True. Let's be really real here, Are these women known for their good looks/talent or for their hair? I don't think any of them would would get looked at twice if their hair wasn't outside the 'expectations' of 'typical' (i.e., permed or kinky) black girl hair.

I'm not saying that it's right or wrong. I'm just saying that 'it is'.

i feel you, im just saying to believe that ABOUT YOURSELF is sad. To consciously or subconsciously believe straight or curly hair will make up the fact that I'm overweight, brownskinned, working class,etc. . .well. . .that's sad to think there is something you have to compensate for.

Alot of cultures believe this look, a Eurocentric look, is a leg up in society.

 

[Southernbella.]

Co-signing Sally dropping in...

Soledo, you've made excellent comments in your last two post.

In regards to the bolded part, July 4th weekend this occurred...I have a friend who's hair is breaking off TERRIBLY due to over processing, it looks horrible. Another MALE friend and I suggested to her that she should take a break and try the natural route, at least to grow her hair out healthy and recover. I ask her can her natural hair look that much worse than her broken off, damaged realxed hair???

Her response....

"I can't, my hair is nappy, I don't have hair like yours, I got that N*GGER hair (hee hee)"

I BLEW UP on her, I was offended by it, she really didn't see what was wrong with what she said and kept on giggling about her comments....

How I interpreted it was that in her mind her natural, unstraightened hair made her a "N", that's the term she associated her natural hair with.

This is the mindset she has as well as others, and not to offend anyone by this, it seems like a common mindset of people in the south from my personal experience (she's from NC, I went to school in the south). Like you said, wish the mindset would change, but I don't think WE will let it.

Oh man. I can't tell you how much that attitude bugs me. I'm relaxed, but I don't think natural hair is ugly, and I always get on my niece about that. I stretch now, and many times, my edges and roots are nappy. I'm no longer bothered by this, but whenever my niece (15 yrs old) sees me, she's all "Ooh, it's about that time isn't it?" and "Don't you love my hair? I just got it permed. Isn't it pretty?". I can't stand it.

I have nothing against relaxers, obviously, but I hate the mindset that some people have that if you let one centimeter of your nappiness show, your hair is jacked up. Like I tell my niece, technically, our hair is supposed to be nappy. Whether you choose to wear it otherwise is your business, but to act like nappy hair is the plague? Not cool.

 

[PaperClip]

Oh man. I can't tell you how much that attitude bugs me. I'm relaxed, but I don't think natural hair is ugly, and I always get on my niece about that. I stretch now, and many times, my edges and roots are nappy. I'm no longer bothered by this, but whenever my niece (15 yrs old) sees me, she's all "Ooh, it's about that time isn't it?" and "Don't you love my hair? I just got it permed. Isn't it pretty?". I can't stand it.

I have nothing against relaxers, obviously, but I hate the mindset that some people have that if you let one centimeter of your nappiness show, your hair is jacked up. Like I tell my niece, technically, our hair is supposed to be nappy. Whether you choose to wear it otherwise is your business, but to act like nappy hair is the plague? Not cool.

I sincerely ask this without being a smart-aleck....

Do you think your message to your niece about natural hair may be slightly "clouded" by your relaxed texture? It's like your niece is being faulted for liking her relaxed her, i.e., your response of "I can't stand it"....

I'm just saying that it may be more difficult/less credible to advocate one thing while doing the opposite of that thing... or maybe not, I don't know that's why I'm putting it out there in a candid, honest way....

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I think it has to do with the person. For me, my relaxed hair was gorgeous and long because I knew how to take care of it properly. My natural hair...is also gorgeous, but I am not able to do anything to it other than a wash n go. I've tried to learn braids, twists, or other styles. It just is not working for me. It is more versatile for me to be relaxed, but I also love my natural hair. I just can't take care of it the way it deserves.erplexed Hope this makes sense.

 

[Cooyah]

I sincerely ask this without being a smart-aleck....

Do you think your message to your niece about natural hair may be slightly "clouded" by your relaxed texture? It's like your niece is being faulted for liking her relaxed her, i.e., your response of "I can't stand it"....

I'm just saying that it may be more difficult/less credible to advocate one thing while doing the opposite of that thing... or maybe not, I don't know that's why I'm putting it out there in a candid, honest way....

Not to speak for Lauren450, but this is what i interpreted. I pulled away that her niece is thinking that the relaxer is some sort of God sent that is a right of passage as opposed to a styling option, which is what lauren uses it for, not because she hates her naps but because she chooses to do something else with them.

Whereas her niece see's her hair and think OH SHOOT a nap is showing let me grab my relaxer, whereas lauren's attitude is one of aw damn i'm only 12 weeks in my stretching let me see if I can make it to 13. Her niece is probably conditioned like a lot of yound women today to think that naps/kinks/coils are "bad" and laurens is trying to educate her.

Sorry to speak for you Lauren450, but that is what i interpret. please clarify.

 

[Southernbella.]

I sincerely ask this without being a smart-aleck....

Do you think your message to your niece about natural hair may be slightly "clouded" by your relaxed texture? It's like your niece is being faulted for liking her relaxed her, i.e., your response of "I can't stand it"....

I'm just saying that it may be more difficult/less credible to advocate one thing while doing the opposite of that thing... or maybe not, I don't know that's why I'm putting it out there in a candid, honest way....

I can't stand her thinking that her natural naps are ugly, not that she relaxes her hair. I love my relaxed hair, and think it's beautiful, but I also love my naps. It may sound contradictory, but I think that's what many naturals don't get. It's possible for relaxed women to like natural hair, and just decide they like to wear their hair straight. But my niece is not one of those people.

So to me, the fact that she's relaxed doesn't bother me at all. It's the fact that she thinks anything else is ugly that bothers me.

So, to answer your question, I don't know for sure, but I doubt it. She knows I'm unashamed of having newgrowth, and that I don't feel the need to relax my hair as soon as a nap is detected, and that I don't relax bone straight. She also sees that my daughter is natural and staying that way. I think she just feels her hair has to be bone straight to be beautiful, and she definitely doesn't get that from me, or her mom, or my mom.

 

[Southernbella.]

Not to speak for Lauren450, but this is what i interpreted. I pulled away that her niece is thinking that the relaxer is some sort of God sent that is a right of passage as opposed to a styling option, which is what lauren uses it for, not because she hates her naps but because she chooses to do something else with them.

Whereas her niece see's her hair and think OH SHOOT a nap is showing let me grab my relaxer, whereas lauren's attitude is one of aw damn i'm only 12 weeks in my stretching let me see if I can make it to 13. Her niece is probably conditioned like a lot of yound women today to think that naps/kinks/coils are "bad" and laurens is trying to educate her.

Sorry to speak for you Lauren450, but that is what i interpret. please clarify.

Yes, that's exacty what I mean! Thank you.

 

[MizaniMami]

I understand where you are coming from but I choose not to be in box and judge people by how they wear their HAIR . I feel that being 'In-tuned" with yourself has more to do with your mentality and not what you choose to put in your hair once it comes out of your scalp... I could never PITY someone because they choose to STAY relaxed there is too much going on in the world to be concerned with something sooo small. There are alot of GREAT woman who choose to relax who does not DESERVE pity!!!

Goodness I love this post. I couldn't have said it better.

 

[dimpalz]

I think hair type has something to do with it to an extent. I have 4a and 4b hair but the way I remembered it was soft and not very curly so I had no real problems wanting to go back to it. My hair is NOTHING like I remember it and that wasn't even 6 years ago. I'll be honest; When I was first relaxed at 15 until I was like 19 I saw regrowth as the bane of my existance, my growth was by no means particularly hard but compared to the silky locks you might aswell have been growing barbed wire out of my scalp.

When I decided to transition because I wanted long hair and after seeing relaxed ladies with long fine hair like mine I realised I'd never have lauren's or mizanimami's hair EVER. I felt like the new growth was heaven sent! Now I was moitsurising it properly and taking care of the little hair I had (once I started transitioning I stopped calling it regrowth and started calling it my hair and ignoring the relaxed bits, doing enough to keep them in decent condition and thats it) I started to get excited at the prospect of curly hair again. So much that I cut the relaxed ends off after 2 months.

The fact of the matter is, you can't tell your hair from that bit of new growth you have, 6 months it's even really enough because it's still got that relaxed bit stuck on the end sucking the life out of it. Most ladies on here have never even seen their natural hair in it's full glory and have only heard their mum/gran/aunt cussing it out for it's "nappyness" and your tender head AGED THREE! No one stops to think that all that cussing is straight from the fact they had the anti-naps attitude burned deep into their upbringing, so for all you know you have a head of perfectly manageable hair.

I was worried about how guys would see me once my soft silky shiny straight hair was gone. My bf and I broke up last spring and I've been single ever since, how would I get a man now with an inch and a half of naps?!?! Simple, the same way as before. I'm fortunate (brutal, unashamed, narcisistic honesty here) that I look damn cute with my TWA, change my outfit and I look damn sexy (I said it was unashamed lol) The same guys look at me, some new ones too, but I do get what people are worried about, we all wanna be attractive to EVERYONE, not just Musiq soulchild but, honestly, you just gotta carry yourself the same.

There is no "other side" for me. Sure I don't feel liberated everyday, because most days I forget that I even had relaxed hair. Whilst transitioning the sight of relaxed hair on anyones head disgusted me, I went through a phase of not being able to understand why anyone would go through all the stress of trying to fix what they essentially destroy every 8 weeks. Now I'm just quite sad. There are so many people that keep relaxing their hair - 2 inches of broken mess sometimes - just because they think it's more manageable or it looks sexier. I'll say it; a broken dried out mess is not sexy just because it's straight!!! If you can't imagine yourself sexy with natural hair, that's just how you are, it's like someone b*tching because you can't imagine yourself sexy at 300lb and they can. It's their perspective.

The most important thing in all this stuff I've typed is that you can't guess how your natural hair is if you've never really seen it. If your reason for not being natural and hiding behind a curtain of straight hair is that your hair is too nappy or unmanageable I really think you should look into it, especially if you haven't seen your natural hair in adulthood. Like I said, I was 15, a teenager, and I didn't full appreciate my natural hair, I couldn't. I couldn't even shift aside my distorted view to really remember what it was like. Do you think that if you haven't seen or felt your natural hair for, in some cases, 15+ years that you really even have the right to assume it's unmanageable?

Food for thought =)

 

[PaperClip]

I can't stand her thinking that her natural naps are ugly, not that she relaxes her hair. I love my relaxed hair, and think it's beautiful, but I also love my naps. It may sound contradictory, but I think that's what many naturals don't get. It's possible for relaxed women to like natural hair, and just decide they like to wear their hair straight. But my niece is not one of those people.

So to me, the fact that she's relaxed doesn't bother me at all. It's the fact that she thinks anything else is ugly that bothers me.

So, to answer your question, I don't know for sure, but I doubt it. She knows I'm unashamed of having newgrowth, and that I don't feel the need to relax my hair as soon as a nap is detected, and that I don't relax bone straight. She also sees that my daughter is natural and staying that way. I think she just feels her hair has to be bone straight to be beautiful, and she definitely doesn't get that from me, or her mom, or my mom.

Thank you for responding.... I didn't say it was completely impossible for a relaxed person to appreciate natural hair, but you do confirm my point about the contradictory nature that can occur in a conversation when a relaxed person attempts to encourage an appreciation of natural hair....

 

[PaperClip]

I understand where you are coming from but I choose not to be in box and judge people by how they wear their HAIR . I feel that being 'In-tuned" with yourself has more to do with your mentality and not what you choose to put in your hair once it comes out of your scalp... I could never PITY someone because they choose to STAY relaxed there is too much going on in the world to be concerned with something sooo small. There are alot of GREAT woman who choose to relax who does not DESERVE pity!!!

Hmmm... my apologies for missing this post.... You begin your response with understanding where I'm coming from and end with an opposing reference to my mention of pity.... Please allow me to clarify that point:

Of course there are PLENTY of issues around the world that deserve our compassion. Please let's keep this conversation in the context of this forum.

I do feel pity (defined as sympathy and sorrow aroused by the misfortune or suffering of another) for those people who may only know life with only relaxed hair because they would not have the opportunity to experience their hair in its full natural state. I do pity someone who got their hair relaxed at 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 years old (like me at 7 years old) because that straight hair mentality gets programed into the mind at such an early age. It is that same programming says that my hair in its natural state is unworthy, and that simply is untrue.

So I do not apologize for my statements, and that is why I advocate the conscious decision to relax at an age-appropriate time. And as was said in this thread, everyone should go through at least one transition to natural so that they can have that experience and that should they decide to relax again, they are doing so with a conscious mind.

 

[JazzyDez]

I think that the ability to transition is based on the person themselves and where we are at mentally, emotionally, psychologically with acceptance of our hair, and ourselves the way God created us. This is not easy particularly because of the ideas being embedded in us for so long that our hair is ugly in it's natural state. Some may say it....others may show it by relaxing their hair on schedule (not saying everyone who relaxes is not accepting of ther natural-selves, but do feel that many of them aren't), by dissing those with natural nair (you need a perm! etc), and when all almost every "beauty icon" (at least in the states) that we are bombarded with on a regular basis have long straight flowing hair. It takes a lot to be able to break apart from this soceital standard, and for some, to meet their natural hair for the first time. This IMO seems more difficult for type 4 ladies, and age plays a much smaller role IMO than some of you suggested. Heck, I think the soceity/community where you live plays a bigger role than age itself. I am also a professional and I always think about the future of my carrer and If I would ever be denied a position because of having natural hair. Now don't get it twisted, I know that there are PLENTY of natural professionals, but I am sure many of them had to overcome obstacles in the corporate world because of their appearance. It's sad that I have to think this way, but it is reality. Until the day when we can choose to be natural and are not subsequently seen as militant, neo-whatever, or "too ethnic," it will continue to be an uphill battle for some of us.

In response to getting some input from relaxed heads, I am a relaxed head ,and I do plan to go natural one day. But I will keep it 100% real with ya'll. I am not ready to do it yet, and when I say ready...I mean that I am not comfortable doing that right now, plain and simple, but one day I will be. A transition to natural hair would be a major, major change in my life. I mean, shoot, I have been chemically altering my hair since grade school , and even before then, my hair stayed pressed. The only memory I have of my natural hair is when my mom would press it. (Side story: I remember my mom pressing my hair one day....and I um.... went over to a friends house and got in the pool. You should have seen everyones faces when I came up out the water Their eyes flew open and their jaws dropped. I guess they didnt know my hair wasnt permed. I didnt know what reversion was at the time and didnt realize what had happened until I felt my hair...and later, looked in the mirror. Well needless to say I learned my lesson )

Another reason why I am not ready to go natural is because I want to reach some goals relaxed first(in regards to hair health and length). It would be a pain trying to start from scratch. (Hats off to all of the ladies who transitioned!! ) But once I prove to myself that I can do it (grow long healthy hair)....I think that it will be easier for me to transition. But on the real, if there was a way to start with long natural hair, or to transform my currently relaxed hair into it's natural state, I probably would. But, I think that transitioning and watching your natural hair grow and "become" is very important also.

And chastising others by implying that they're foolish for not yet being able to completely love and accept their natural hair will do very little IMO. Wanting to make the transition needs to come from within.

Sorry so long guys.....I can ramble sometimes

 

[firecracker]

I don't know if there is a easier way to go natural. I tried to transition but I had no patience so I bc'd. I would have preferred not to go thru the growing long process but at least I have learned what works for my hair texture. I cannot wait to have a head full of long natural wild hair.

I was afraid to go natural for a long time for few reasons.
1. I had a perm since jr high.
2. I didn't know if I could handle the bush natural?
3. How would it fit into my personal style.

I'm confident so natural or relaxed didn't really matter if I was having a bad hair day. I just felt less fly for the moment.

 

[Sarafina]

I had no idea there would be so many honest answers. Thanks for taking the time to respond to the post. I'm pleasantly surprised by how many different turns the discussion took.

I still do think some of us have it easier to be natural than others simply because of society's standards. But at the same time, how you personally feel about yourself affects your ability to be natural (regardless of texture, geography, age, etc.)

Personally, I think my problem was with length more so than anything else. If I could have switched natural hair for the length I had relaxed (or even now, when I'm texlaxed/texturized) I would have done it in a heartbeat--shrinkage included. So I'm thinking now that I won't relax but keep my hair in braids for another year so I don't have to deal with it in school.

 

[Southernbella.]

I think I've pretty much decided that when I go natural, I will BC and keep it close cropped. I'm fine with that because I've had short hair before. Besides, I'm sure I'm going to get sick and tired of long hair at some point.

 

[caligurl]

I do feel pity (defined as sympathy and sorrow aroused by the misfortune or suffering of another)for those people who may only know life with only relaxed hair because they would not have the opportunity to experience their hair in its full natural state. I do pity someone who got their hair relaxed at 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 years old (like me at 7 years old) because that straight hair mentality gets programed into the mind at such an early age. It is that same programming says that my hair in its natural state is unworthy, and that simply is untrue.

So I do not apologize for my statements, and that is why I advocate the conscious decision to relax at an age-appropriate time. And as was said in this thread, everyone should go through at least one transition to natural so that they can have that experience and that should they decide to relax again, they are doing so with a conscious mind.

I disagree with you on two points. One: I was relaxed at age 10, but not because I was programmed to believe that kinky hair was bad. Honestly at 10 I don't think I was that deep. I was relaxed because it was my mothers choice not mine. Just like I couldn't decide what to wear until I was 12. My mother is natural by the way.

Two: I don't agree that everyone should be natural once. If you don't want to be natural don't be natural. There is nothing wrong with a person preferring straight hair.

I myself have been relaxed, natural, blond, a red head, had a weave, braids, etc. Hair is an accessory... an extension of how I feel that day. I feel like your reading way too much into this issue. Maybe I just don't have the issues that you think all black women have. It is just hair! I think there a lot of women who also feel this way.

 

[neena]

I know this is a little off topic but.....

Everyone is making very valid points.

It would be nice to hear from some other relaxed heads. I wonder why during these posts relaxed heads avoid them like the plaque It would be nice to hear some relaxed points of views.

The reason why some relaxed ppl avoid threads like these is because it always turns into a natural vs. relaxed battle. Personally, I get tired of defending my relaxed hair to "naturals." There are so many "naturals", both on this board and off, that think they are better than those who relax and get in every thread like this preaching about how their hair is healthier, they're embracing their roots, theyre not ashamed of their hair and heritage, etc. It really gets sickening. Just like some "naturals" are tired of defending their "natural" hair, there are relaxed ppl who are sick of defending being relaxed. I am one of those relaxed people. Just because I relax my hair, that doesnt mean I'm ashamed of my kinky 4b hair. I am not trying to "fit the European standards of beauty."

BTW relaxers are NOT the reason some ppls hair is broken off or damaged. Its the lack of knowledge of maintaining their hair. There are plenty of "naturals" whose hair looks a H.A.M. because it is not properly maintained.
I've seen "naturals" whose hair is fried from flat ironing, pressing, and blowdrying to get straight hair. I've also seen "naturals" who have no hairline because the wear too tight twists and pull their hair back into those Puffs everyday. "Natural" doesnt always mean "healthy". It doesnt mean you are anymore intuned with your heritage than anybody else. "Relaxed" doesnt always mean "damaged" and that you are ashamed of your virgin hair. I know this has been said a million times before but its just hair. It shouldnt define us.

Just my 2 cents

 

[neena]

I disagree with you on two points. One: I was relaxed at age 10, but not because I was programmed to believe that kinky hair was bad. Honestly at 10 I don't think I was that deep. I was relaxed because it was my mothers choice not mine. Just like I couldn't decide what to wear until I was 12. My mother is natural by the way.

Two: I don't agree that everyone should be natural once. If you don't want to be natural don't be natural. There is nothing wrong with a person preferring straight hair.

I myself have been relaxed, natural, blond, a red head, had a weave, braids, etc. Hair is an accessory... an extension of how I feel that day. I feel like your reading way too much into this issue. Maybe I just don't have the issues that you think all black women have. It is just hair! I think there a lot of women who also feel this way.

ITA

 

[Sarafina]

Everyone keeps using the word "HAM". What does H.A.M. mean? Somebody p.m. me if its' bad

 

[PaperClip]

I disagree with you on two points. One: I was relaxed at age 10, but not because I was programmed to believe that kinky hair was bad. Honestly at 10 I don't think I was that deep. I was relaxed because it was my mothers choice not mine. Just like I couldn't decide what to wear until I was 12. My mother is natural by the way.

Two: I don't agree that everyone should be natural once. If you don't want to be natural don't be natural. There is nothing wrong with a person preferring straight hair.

I myself have been relaxed, natural, blond, a red head, had a weave, braids, etc. Hair is an accessory... an extension of how I feel that day. I feel like your reading way too much into this issue. Maybe I just don't have the issues that you think all black women have. It is just hair! I think there a lot of women who also feel this way.

At 10 years old you wouldn't think it was that deep, either. I didn't think so at 7 years old. I was thinking about baby dolls (thank God that's all I had to think about....I had a healthy childhood). Same thing with you as me: it wasn't a personal choice. I think relaxing should be a personal, conscious choice.

And I never said that all black women have (the same) issues about their hair. This board is evidence that women of color and hair issues cross a wide spectrum. If it was "just hair", then this board would have fewer (paid) members....

 

[firecracker]

Natural or relaxed. Its a choice. Thank goodness we live in a world where we have choices. No one has to ever see their natural hair if they choose not to. For who and for what?

 

[Sweet_Ambrosia]

I think that the ability to transition is based on the person themselves and where we are at mentally, emotionally, psychologically with acceptance of our hair, and ourselves the way God created us.

Thank You!

 

[PaperClip]

Natural or relaxed. Its a choice. Thank goodness we live in a world where we have choices. No one has to ever see their natural hair if they choose not to. For who and for what?

I compare this to someone who had never left their childhood home, block, city, state, etc. There's more to see, know, do and experience...and it builds: 1) a greater appreciation for the familiar, and/or 2) provides an opportunity to know there's plenty of room to expand hair options.

I do not share these points in an air of negativity but as a point of passionate encouragement.

 

[firecracker]

I compare this to someone who had never left their childhood home, block, city, state, etc. There's more to see, know, do and experience...and it builds: 1) a greater appreciation for the familiar, and/or 2) provides an opportunity to know there's plenty of room to expand hair options.

I do not share these points in an air of negativity but as a point of passionate encouragement.

I gotcha in other words "nothing beats a failure but a try". I didn't think you were being negative or militant.