How Long Would You Wait

[movingforward13]

At work we were chatting about women over 30 waiting for their guys to be ready for marriage. If you found yourself in that situation, how long would you wait?

The discussion came about because unfortunately men are known to waste a woman's time if they are unsure about her and then end up marrying the next chick.

 

[C@ssandr@]

I think it only takes about a year to know if you want to marry a person. Especially if you have dating experience.

 

[luckiestdestiny]

It takes a guy 6 months or less to know and he'll talk about it before then though it could take up to a year to ask. I am not talking early or mid twenties. But definitely late 20s and onward.

I wouldn't wait on anyone anyways. If he's serious and wants you he'll step up. Then the question is do you want him

 

[MizAvalon]

I wouldn't wait at all for a man to be "ready" for marriage. I would make my intentions known at the beginning of the relationship and he's either on board or he's not.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Ready for marriage or ready for marriage with you? Important distinction.

 

[Supervixen]

As someone who dated a man far too long--from mid 20s to early 30s, do not date anyone too long. Make your intentions known, know his intentions with you and adjust according. Dont let him sell you a dream. If you start to get the itch to move on, DO IT.

I also wouldn't close doors completely to guy friends for anything short of a fiancé--they could be or may know potential suitors. I met my husband by going to another Big Ten uni's alumni's event. A mutual guy friend invited us both to the event--DH was an alum, I was just out kicking it.

Play this dating game to win!

 

[sky_blu]

If I had to do it again it wouldn't be anymore than a year now that Im ready to make that final step.

 

[movingforward13]

Ready for marriage or ready for marriage with you? Important distinction.

Ready for marriage with you. I am from the school that even if a man isn't ready for marriage, if he wants you, then he will get himself ready. He won't risk losing what he has.

I now have guy friends that are ready for marriage but they don't have a woman. If they found one tomorrow, the chances of a proposal on a shortened timeframe is very high if they think she is the one.

 

[summertimewine]

When a man knows, he knows.
Should take 6 months or less. He might not ask, but he will begin to prepare his life for marriage. I didn't wait more than 6 months in my early twenties and I sure as hell wouldn't wait any longer in my late twenties/thirties

 

[lux10023]

pretty much this was me...i let dudes know up front the only title that resonated with me at that point in my life is wife....
picture me being 30+ someone girlfriend nah buddy....

women control their fate i dont know why women put up with men who puddy foot around...men are action oriented....you not with the husband title im out... you think imma waste my pretty..my puddy and my time on you...nah sahhhh lmaooooo

I wouldn't wait at all for a man to be "ready" for marriage. I would make my intentions known at the beginning of the relationship and he's either on board or he's not.

 

[DarkJoy]

4 to 6 months. They start talking about marriage around 3 months tbh. As someone whose had multiple proposals, ime they will lock you down with the quickness to insure you dont slip away.

Past 6 months it becomes a waste of time if marriage is your goal.

 

[DarkJoy]

When a man knows, he knows.
Should take 6 months or less. He might not ask, but he will begin to prepare his life for marriage. I didn't wait more than 6 months in my early twenties and I sure as hell wouldn't wait any longer in my late twenties/thirties

Right! First hint: they start talking about and actively looking for a better position. They also associate less with suspect friends.

The biggest is the job though. Anytime a dude is not talking about bettering his financial situation is my hint that we just gonna kick ot for a little while.

 

[Neomorph]

I would wait at least a year. I want to make sure I really get to know him as a partner even if he started talking about marriage around 6 months. But past 2 years (barring some circumstance like huge family crisis) I wouldn't wait any longer. That's wasting both of our times.

I've seen marriages in my family fail when they waited less than a year but also when they waited well past 2 years (like 6 or 7). So for me 1-2 years seems to be a good point for me.

 

[Jmartjrmd]

Ready for marriage with you. I am from the school that even if a man isn't ready for marriage, if he wants you, then he will get himself ready. He won't risk losing what he has.

I now have guy friends that are ready for marriage but they don't have a woman. If they found one tomorrow, the chances of a proposal on a shortened timeframe is very high if they think she is the one.

Girl...where your friends at. I have a friend I need to hook up stat.

 

[beingofserenity]

I would give a guy two or three weeks if I was over 30. I would maybe give him more time if I was dating other people.

 

[movingforward13]

I would give a guy two or three weeks if I was over 30. I would maybe give him more time if I was dating other people.

2-3 weeks for a proposal?

 

[movingforward13]

Girl...where your friends at. I have a friend I need to hook up stat.

Lol Connecticut

 

[SheenaVee]

I would give a guy two or three weeks if I was over 30. I would maybe give him more time if I was dating other people.

The things you come out with.

 

[lesedi]

@beingofserenity girl you are a messEngaged on the third date

 

[beingofserenity]

Oh my bad, I meant I would only exclusively date someone for a couple of weeks to determine whether he was a person I could marry. Whoops, guess I didn't read the prompt completely.

 

[Ajna]

I think the key word here is ready for marriage. I don't date men who are not interested in marriage. I ask that question on the first date if you say no or give me a BS answer there is no second date. It really is as simple as that. To me the question is not about being ready for marriage - you should be that before I met you - the question is do I want to marry you and do you want to marry me.

 

[LovinLea]

Right now I would only date a guy who knows before you're even in the picture that he wants a wife. Because if he doesn't come up with the idea and I do, I'll be waiting around forever. And I'm not interested in wasting time. There's too many men out there.

 

[ScorpioBeauty09]

I'm still in my 20s but I'm not going to wait for a man to be ready. If he's not, I KIM. Even when I was in early 20s I wasn't about waiting for a man to be ready. It's too easy to get heartbroken that way. I'm not about to waste my time with a man who's not ready. I'll be missing out on a man who is.