How Has Not Being A Heaux Benefitted You? And Vice Versa

Layluh said:
My definition of ho doesnt have anything to do with whether you have sex or not. It's simply a woman who gets her money/blessings/heaven upfront.

We're conditioned as women through religion, especially BW, to wait to receive our blessings and often times they never come. So I don't know just make sure when you get yours, you get it up front. That's all.
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Quoted for emphasis.
 
BEAUTYU2U said:
How do you target the men? What do you see in their character that let's you know they'll be generous or doting? I don't think I have this ability to sniff out the right ones.
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Look for men that have a savior complex and/or have a thing for helping women. I find that they are the most generous when they see that you have your own thing going on and can handle your own affairs but just need a little extra help. A man that is ripe for this is one that doesn't feel needed or appreciated in other areas of his life. Then you show up giving him an opportunity to be a hero and he just eats it up.

Men love a damsel in distress if he can be the big, strong man to ease the distress.
 
MizAvalon said:
Look for men that have a savior complex and/or have a thing for helping women. I find that they are the most generous when they see that you have your own thing going on and can handle your own affairs but just need a little extra help. A man that is ripe for this is one that doesn't feel needed or appreciated in other areas of his life. Then you show up giving him an opportunity to be a hero and he just eats it up.

Men love a damsel in distress if he can be the big, strong man to ease the distress.
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Men strong in their water element are good for this.
 
Layluh said:
My definition of ho doesnt have anything to do with whether you have sex or not. It's simply a woman who gets her money/blessings/heaven upfront.

We're conditioned as women through religion, especially BW, to wait to receive our blessings and often times they never come. So I don't know just make sure when you get yours, you get it up front. That's all.
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Petal26 said:
Quoted for emphasis.
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Plus One.

Team heaven on earth for black women. And I am not about that sexual heaux life. But no judgement here if that is part of your strategy. Get what you want and deserve in this lifetime, being smart, strategic, and calculating. Use what you choose to use and are comfortable with. Get money, get love, get trips, get dates, get what your heart desires by whatever means you are comfortable with. Just make sure you don't fall for the okey doke that we (black women) are supposed to suffer on earth and get our blessings later.

So happy you started this thread @Layluh. #HeavenOnEarth.
 
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Hmmmmm.... I need to re-evaluate my whole life.. Not hoeing has gotten me no damn where... I have a friend guy who buys me things but.....

Knowing my life could be much more grand if I was using my time being ***-riffic kinda makes me feel a certain way..
 
Not heauxing has gotten me absolutely nothing - but I'm very spoiled by knowing that I can accomplish anything I want by myself... Generally speaking, I have nothing against it, but believe that the time and mental effort is better spent doing other things... Also, peace of mind and self pride are priceless....

However, now that I'm slightly older, I am a strong believer that when considering a life partner, the finances of your partner should be a major consideration.. you may not upgrade but at least don't water down what you have.
 
I think it's less about heauxing and more about knowing your worth and then being strategic about it (this doesn't equal heaux to me). I have a friend who just married wealthy, I'm talking NYC, upper west side, luxury living wealth. She was never a heaux but strategically and unapologetically dated only certain types of men. Yes the certain type is white and wealthy :look:
 
FemmeFatale said:
I think it's less about heauxing and more about knowing your worth and then being strategic about it (this doesn't equal heaux to me). I have a friend who just married wealthy, I'm talking NYC, upper west side, luxury living wealth. She was never a heaux but strategically and unapologetically dated only certain types of men. Yes the certain type is white and wealthy :look:
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Very good point.
 
barbiesocialite said:
@Layluh I'm mad this thread is so long:lachen:

That says a lot....
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Shoot! I'm reading it closely and I'm married with chillun:lachen:

I am only semi serious that this may be Plan B if my happily ever after doesn't work out.:look:

Completely serious about finding some tips in getting what I want in my career and interpersonal life since I think alot of the "tactics" used can be applied in other situations that aren't necessarily sexual in nature, but require that same kind of "negotiating skill" if you will.

Did some reading on the subject and it's interesting how some tips mentioned here appear in books dealing in the art of negotiating.
 
BrickbyBrick said:
Shoot! I'm reading it closely and I'm married with chillun:lachen:

I am only semi serious that this may be Plan B if my happily ever after doesn't work out.:look:

Completely serious about finding some tips in getting what I want in my career and interpersonal life since I think alot of the "tactics" used can be applied in other situations that aren't necessarily sexual in nature, but require that same kind of "negotiating skill" if you will.

Did some reading on the subject and it's interesting how some tips mentioned here appear in books dealing in the art of negotiating.
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I'm married too and realize my life could have been so much better if I had known and implemented some of these tips. But I am taking notes to share with my daughters when they are older so they make better choices than I did. To clarify, I want them to marry someone who can upgrade their life. Don't get me wrong, I want them to be successful and very capable of taking care of themselves, but any man they marry should be able to significantly improve their lifestyle. So taking notes from this thread, the thread about how to meet a rich man, and the feminitity threads.

In terms of using these tips in other areas, I realize that the clear girl at work is using these same tips and has all the men in the office breaking their neck to help her with every little thing she mentions. I'm looking for a new job and I want to try this thing out too and see what happens.
 
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Well, I did the crash course *** thing and I got my fill super quick. It taught me a lot about the kind of man I don't like and certain traits I do like. I tried the sugar daddy thing and I couldn't do it. Online dating. I get offers in real life every once in a while but I can't. I learned a lot about life in general. Picking your battles, learning certain social cues, hygiene, etc.

Now I am happily in a relationship that I'd never trade for the *** lifestyle.
 
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