Has anyone ever made these type of comments to you before?

[Maracujá]

I'm one of the few ladies at work in my department without children or a DH/SO and the ladies in my department are usually pregnant - I'm not joking - last year six of them were pregnant and this year was no different. So we've named our department the babyboom department and we were joking about it today, trying to guess who's gonna get pregnant next. Here's how the convo went:

T: I wonder who is gonna be pregnant next?
A: Me too!
Me: Yeah me too, probably one of y'all lol.
T: Nah won't be me, I already got two at home: my DH and my lil girl. It'll probably be you, you'll show up here with a baby bump and no man around.
Me: No that won't happen.

I found those comments to be mean and hurtful, how you just goin' to assume someone will end up being a babymama? Whatever! Has anyone ever made these types of comments to you before? How did you react?

 

[ThickHair]

Pay it no mind, she is just talking smack. I hear all the time that I will be the next one knocked up. I make sure to mention, I would have to have a husband first. That cuts it off 100% of the time. In my assumption, I assume too, that they would rather be in a childfree situtation than their own.

I don't know why women do that. I have never heard of men talking like that in the workplace.

 

[melissa-bee]

T: I wonder who is gonna be pregnant next?
A: Me too!
Me: Yeah me too, probably one of y'all lol.
T: Nah won't be me, I already got two at home: my DH and my lil girl. It'll probably be you, you'll show up here with a baby bump and no man around.
Me: No that won't happen.

I found those comments to be mean and hurtful, how you just goin' to assume someone will end up being a babymama? Whatever! Has anyone ever made these types of comments to you before? How did you react?

That's so rude, deep down she probably thinks you're never going to get a man, I don't know how that could slip out of someone's mouth.

 

[itismehmmkay]

That was crazy; yeah why would she say that?

 

[LongTimeComing]

I've people say this as well. I tend to say something along the lines of there being a natural progression of things and in my world husband comes before children.

Every now and then I will get a slick reply about how we all plan, but things don't happen according to plan. In which I give a giggle and then silence. Most times though, they are quiet after that.

 

[NaijaTroll]

I
T: Nah won't be me, I already got two at home: my DH and my lil girl. It'll probably be you, you'll show up here with a baby bump and no man around.
Me: No that won't happen.

That was unnecessary snide. she could have said "one day you'll come rololing in about your new marriage and baby bump"..adding "no man around" was totally messed up on her part and frankly I wouldnt be cool with her wack tactless arse anymore

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

I think she was snarky with the "no man around" part.

 

[HoneyA]

It'll probably be you, you'll show up here with a baby bump and no man around.

This is out of order. What was she thinking saying that to you? Some people have no shame. I'm sorry you didn't tell her off. Some people need to be put in their place.

 

[hopeful]

I'm sorry she said that to you. It was rude and out of order. She is making awful assumptions about you: you can't/won't get an SO and you would be immoral and dumb enough to get pregnant by just anyone. She sounds like a very negative person.

 

[PretteePlease]

Nawl but I say kill folks with kindness INSTANTLY. Prepare your snide come back for the next time they say something slick and then serve them up!

 

[awhyley]

That "and no man around" is really crappy. Don't let that ***** get you down. She just mad that she has baggage.

 

[DrC]

I'm one of the few ladies at work in my department without children or a DH/SO and the ladies in my department are usually pregnant - I'm not joking - last year six of them were pregnant and this year was no different. So we've named our department the babyboom department and we were joking about it today, trying to guess who's gonna get pregnant next. Here's how the convo went:

T: I wonder who is gonna be pregnant next?
A: Me too!
Me: Yeah me too, probably one of y'all lol.
T: Nah won't be me, I already got two at home: my DH and my lil girl. It'll probably be you, you'll show up here with a baby bump and no man around.
Me: No that won't happen.

I found those comments to be mean and hurtful, how you just goin' to assume someone will end up being a babymama? Whatever! Has anyone ever made these types of comments to you before? How did you react?

Everyone in my class has kids except me and another girl. One of my classmates just had her baby in December and they always say: "You're next girl."
They don't mean any derogatory offense to it since its all love. They want me to be pregnant because they think me and my SO will have pretty babies...lol


Now on the OTHER hand, my friends in High School would do that because misery loves company I guess. By the time I graduated from High School, all of my friends were either pregnant, or already had a kid on their next one.
Years later I run into them and they always come with the response of "Have any kids yet?" No? Aww bummer" Like they are plotting for my future to be interrupted with children. erplexed

 

[InchHighPrivateEye]

It's not uncommon to hear the "you'll have a baby next/soon," part because nosey family-oriented people always say stuff like that, but the "with no man around" part threw me off. She was trying to be funny with that part and I don't like it.

 

[Maracujá]

I was so caught off guard that I didn't know what else to sayerplexed I think it's so weird because it's actually someone I'm friendly with, we get along pretty well...

 

[shasha8685]

My mom's friend made a comment similar to this over the Christmas holidays. She asked when I was gonna have a baby. I paused and was like...when I get married. She proceeds to say well what if you don't get married then what? Life sometimes doesn't work out according to plan.



Excuse me? Pardon me for wanting to a) be ready to have a baby and b) have a solid family structure in place.

I was so hot that day. I can definitely relate OP....

 

[Bmack]

I'm one of the few ladies at work in my department without children or a DH/SO and the ladies in my department are usually pregnant - I'm not joking - last year six of them were pregnant and this year was no different. So we've named our department the babyboom department and we were joking about it today, trying to guess who's gonna get pregnant next. Here's how the convo went:

T: I wonder who is gonna be pregnant next?
A: Me too!
Me: Yeah me too, probably one of y'all lol.
T: Nah won't be me, I already got two at home: my DH and my lil girl. It'll probably be you, you'll show up here with a baby bump and no man around.
Me: No that won't happen.

I found those comments to be mean and hurtful, how you just goin' to assume someone will end up being a babymama? Whatever! Has anyone ever made these types of comments to you before? How did you react?

Wow, why would she say with no man around... Who just makes an assumption like that, and then to voice it???

 

[Love Always]

What the mess, how did your mom feel about her friend making that comment to you?

My mom's friend made a comment similar to this over the Christmas holidays. She asked when I was gonna have a baby. I paused and was like...when I get married. She proceeds to say well what if you don't get married then what? Life sometimes doesn't work out according to plan.



Excuse me? Pardon me for wanting to a) be ready to have a baby and b) have a solid family structure in place.

I was so hot that day. I can definitely relate OP....

 

[shasha8685]

What the mess, how did your mom feel about her friend making that comment to you?

I kinda had to go off on my mom too. She tried to defend me during that whole debacle but she did it in a joking manner (e.g.--"She's not ready. Don't hassle her about that. :laughs:"). I told her that my personal life, especially that aspect of my personal life, is not up for discussion b/c next time I may throw in a remark about how her friend became a grandmother at 37 and that won't end nicely.

 

[antisocial]

I've gotten similar ridiculous comments...For some reason people seem to think that if you're young, single, with no children that something must be wrong with you or you can't get or keep a man erplexed

However, if you're a black man with those same attributes you get praise and worship

 

[InchHighPrivateEye]

I've gotten similar ridiculous comments...For some reason people seem to think that if you're young, single, with no children that something must be wrong with you or you can't get or keep a man erplexed

However, if you're a black man with those same attributes you get praise and worship

One of my coworkers was like, "we have to find you a date. Now let's see, who can I...."erplexed I have never in my life had anyone assume that I couldn't get a date or a man (really, who can't get one?), so I laughed, but then I realized she was serious. When I told her I had a date planned to get her off my back, she then went into "teacher" mode and started trying to tell me how to act on the date (um...) , and then continued to ask about him everyday for about 3 weeks--until I told her he died--but that's a topic for a different day...

 

[Maracujá]

One of my coworkers was like, "we have to find you a date. Now let's see, who can I...."erplexed I have never in my life had anyone assume that I couldn't get a date or a man (really, who can't get one?), so I laughed, but then I realized she was serious. When I told her I had a date planned to get her off my back, she then went into "teacher" mode and started trying to tell me how to act on the date (um...) , and then continued to ask about him everyday for about 3 weeks--until I told her he died--but that's a topic for a different day...

One of my co-workers suggested - out of the blue - that I try online dating, I was likeerplexed

 

[TamedTresses]

People are just rude. If she had left it at you would probably be the next person with a baby bump...cool. Why did she have to add you won't have a man around? Some people...

 

[InchHighPrivateEye]

People are just rude. If she had left it at you would probably be the next person with a baby bump...cool. Why did she have to add you won't have a man around? Some people...

Right! What is that? This is how people get their feelings hurt. How is that acceptable to say? Chile, uh uh.

 

[song_of_serenity]

People are just rude. If she had left it at you would probably be the next person with a baby bump...cool. Why did she have to add you won't have a man around? Some people...

EXACTLY. Everyone has heard "You're gonna be next" weather weddings, heck even pregnancy. But the "no man around" was intentionally snide.

 

[chocolat79]

With that "no man around part", I literally would've given her the side eye and NO smile.

 

[TamedTresses]

Right! What is that? This is how people get their feelings hurt. How is that acceptable to say? Chile, uh uh.

EXACTLY. Everyone has heard "You're gonna be next" weather weddings, heck even pregnancy. But the "no man around" was intentionally snide.

I would've had to ask her what the heck she meant from that comment. The nerve!

 

[DrC]

OP, about that lady who said the slick remark....does she have a man?

 

[imaccami]

You should've laughed and said, "no, it'll probably be you after you're divorced and on the rebound." She was being a b****, she's not living in some alternate universe where it's polite to say something like that.

Now you know she's not your friend. Not even a work friend.

 

[*CherryPie*]

Yeah, that "no man around" add on was nasty. What made her think that she could say something like that to you? And get away with it?erplexed

Girl, don't you allow that kind of nonsense to be spoken to you! You have to learn the art of kindly, and respectfully, putting people in their place.

 

[LoveisYou]

pure ig'nance