*~*Celibacy Support Thread*~*
- Thread starter mischka
- Start date
I had decided I was going to take an indefinite break from other parts of the forum outside of hair. But I just had to check in here real quick, don't have anyone irl who could relate. Had a brief moment of weakness, nothing was about to happen or anything like that, but I just found myself questioning, umm why am i doing this again? lol
So after like a year of virtually no male contact at all, I finally went out with someone this past wknd. And he was really cute! I have rarely went out with men I find attractive so that was a big deal for me, its usually someone I think is "nice" or "cool", but not necessarily attracted to.
I found myself thinking...ok, so say this doesn't ever go anywhere (which I suspect it won't for various reasons, but thats tbd), why can't I keep him around for extracurricular activities?
But alas, I reminded myself of all the reasons I decided to stop having casual sex. And that i told myself I would try it this way. Why keep repeating stuff from before that obviously wasn't working out the way I wanted, so let me at least try it this way and see what happens.
So after like a year of virtually no male contact at all, I finally went out with someone this past wknd. And he was really cute! I have rarely went out with men I find attractive so that was a big deal for me, its usually someone I think is "nice" or "cool", but not necessarily attracted to.
I found myself thinking...ok, so say this doesn't ever go anywhere (which I suspect it won't for various reasons, but thats tbd), why can't I keep him around for extracurricular activities?
But alas, I reminded myself of all the reasons I decided to stop having casual sex. And that i told myself I would try it this way. Why keep repeating stuff from before that obviously wasn't working out the way I wanted, so let me at least try it this way and see what happens.
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Etherealsmile
Well-Known Member
nappystorm
Well-Known Member
Well damn, lol. Least u gave it a shot.
Honestly if I had an ex I was still cool with, I'd probably do the same.
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Flawless_JYM
New Member
According to Dedan Tolbert you are emotionally unavailable and will never find an "elite man" lol Heck listening to him though alot of women are though.
*SkolarStar*
Well-Known Member
so has anyone actually been TEMPTED or all we all just coasting along because we're hanging out in the damn dry *** dessert and theres nothing to potentially jeopardize things?
The bolded is me. But now that I'm trying to get back in the swing of things, I know that I'm going to be thrown into the pool of temptation soon. I need to be mentally ready but I don't know how I'm going to get there. I haven't seen a fine man in a long time and when I do, I have no clue what's going to happen.
mischka Thank you for being honest about how you feel. I think the most dangerous mistake that people make when being celibate is breaking the celibacy on iffy feelings about it. If you want to have sex then do it with no regrets and if you want to wait it out then do that with no regrets.
SuchMagnificent
Taking a Break from Posting
Sooo I forsee myself leaving this challenge in the near future...The older gentleman is making his case and it has been very persuasive thus far
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Sent from my Sprint HTC Evo using Long Hair Care Forum App
^^^Its gonna be a ghost town up in here. lol!
I'll still be here tho for quite some time. Bc even if I did meet someone I was interested in it would be SEVERAL months before I felt comfortable enough for it to get physical. The idea of being intimate with someone I don't feel like I "know" for real is just very unappealing. And no viable old flames, so, I'm posted up.
I'll still be here tho for quite some time. Bc even if I did meet someone I was interested in it would be SEVERAL months before I felt comfortable enough for it to get physical. The idea of being intimate with someone I don't feel like I "know" for real is just very unappealing. And no viable old flames, so, I'm posted up.
SuchMagnificent
Taking a Break from Posting
Yeah, Im trying really hard to keep it under wraps, but its definitely the elephant in the room..he is so charismatic and we click..with our 10 year age difference, I cant possibly consider him boyfriend material, but he can definitely come in handy on those lonely nights..I will try to avoid "it" but with his presence, it makes it a very difficult task
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I don't think 10 years is that big of an age difference. My grandfather was 10 years older than my grandmother, they were married 30 yrs before he passed.
Now, my grandmother's sister's husband is about 25 yrs older than her and thats not the business. She is basically having to take care of him now bc he is 90 something and she is mid sixties.
Etherealsmile
Well-Known Member
lol!
Imani tell me about it. I'm in school right now and I've seen several men that make me question my celibacy
. However, I'm still losing weight, i'm not at my goal yet so i'm pretty much under wraps for now until I feel comfortable enough to start dating again. I don't foresee myself leaving this thread anytime soon so i'll definitely be around
^^^The guy I went out with in my earlier post has been nonresponsive to a recent text, so he will probably be falling off the radar soon. No sweat, just glad I got my feet a little wet in the dating game. All types of red flags and bad vibes were coming up anyway. I have some personal goals I'm working on too and thankfully I've learned to focus on myself and have a life/hobbies so when that happens I'm not all broken up about random dudes who weren't thinking about me.
So yeah, back to square one. It was fun to date, so hopefully I'll continue to meet people. Just chilling and having fun right now, sex is not on the radar for the near future.
So yeah, back to square one. It was fun to date, so hopefully I'll continue to meet people. Just chilling and having fun right now, sex is not on the radar for the near future.
Msstarr718
Well-Known Member
I don't see anything wrong with a throwback just no new kangs
carlana25
New Member
Lmaoooo you ladies are so funny you gals made my day I need some advice so I can decide if I should jump on this.... I have this guy that I've been dating on and off for about 8 years and we became friends again last year we are sleeping together ( and he is magnificent in bed
)BUT I think I want more than just sex so i continue to ask him what is the status of our relationship ans he refuses to answer me.... So ladies should I leave him alone and keep my vag to myself
)BUT I think I want more than just sex so i continue to ask him what is the status of our relationship ans he refuses to answer me.... So ladies should I leave him alone and keep my vag to myself
nc cutie
Active Member
Well I am still holding on.
.several years now. Starting to wonder what I am waiting on. Today I began dirty texting my ex. My saved friend just had mind blowing sex from a high school friend. Her divorce is final in August. The details of her night made me want to.....
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.several years now. Starting to wonder what I am waiting on. Today I began dirty texting my ex. My saved friend just had mind blowing sex from a high school friend. Her divorce is final in August. The details of her night made me want to.....
Sent from my LG-P509 using LG-P509
Keshieshimmer
Active Member
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
Oh how I wish I could say I got some I really want to say that but I have stayed on the dry landing as dick makes you stupid at times..
mischka
shrinkage.
ok so im finally hitting the tough spots. now the physical need/urge/desire to have sex is becoming overpowering. ive been expecting this to happen, especially since i went off the pill. and its not about getting off. an orgasm is about the last thing i want right now. (well ok not the last thing. but its definitely not at the heart of this desire.)
i need the physical intimacy of a man. i need the pleasurable experience of connecting sexually. i need to let loose and relax in a socially free environment. i want. to have sex. sex is fun. i want that fun.
im thinking about all kinds of random sex ive had in the past (why did i think it was a good idea to read past entries in my journal?). im thinking of the basketball player i boned in college, once in the showers at my dorm
. or dude i was so completely infatuated with for years that i cant ever have again and how unattainably perfect it all seems now.
this is getting awful
eta: i messaged dude today on facebook (we still hook up from time to time when we are both available) and said "randomly thinking bout
you in the showers at neptune".... he replied back like wow i forgot all about that we need to get together soon
i need the physical intimacy of a man. i need the pleasurable experience of connecting sexually. i need to let loose and relax in a socially free environment. i want. to have sex. sex is fun. i want that fun.
im thinking about all kinds of random sex ive had in the past (why did i think it was a good idea to read past entries in my journal?). im thinking of the basketball player i boned in college, once in the showers at my dorm
. or dude i was so completely infatuated with for years that i cant ever have again and how unattainably perfect it all seems now. this is getting awful
eta: i messaged dude today on facebook (we still hook up from time to time when we are both available) and said "randomly thinking bout
you in the showers at neptune".... he replied back like wow i forgot all about that we need to get together soon
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SerenavanderWoodsen
SkinnyMe
Etherealsmile
Well-Known Member
believe me i would if i had any options right now
This is exactly where i'm at right now. I'm so over celibacy its not even funny
nappystorm
Well-Known Member
#TeamCobwebs checking in. I'm still here. I just spent two nights with a man and the most physical contact we had was holding hands n he gave me a peck on the mouth when I was leaving. I'm glad he was a gentleman
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