Blast From the Past

[Aveena]

My very first "real" boyfriend contacted me last week. We where together for about 1 1/2 years about 16 years ago! We broke up on very bad terms.... He was the only relationship that I had that ended so badly. I learned from my mistakes with him-him bullying and ultimately jumping out of the bushes on me and my new man in the end. erplexed

So, I guess he googled me and found out my home address, where I work (he contacted me at work) and everything. He really caught me off guard because he was the last person I would have expected to call me at work.

Anyway, he says he is going to be in town this Wednesday and wants to see me? IRL I have no idea how to handle this! I know I have no desire to be friends as he is married and I dumped him because I really didn't like him. But, I have no idea how to tactfully handle this situation.

I don't know what I'm gonna do

 

[bluediamond0829]

I think you should make yourself busy or either go on a small trip so he cant just show up some places that you frequent trying to spot you in the crowd or something....

i mean even if you have a man now i wouldnt change my plans to meet him or for him...

since its like your wrote i would actually be kind of terrified because for him to go thru all that to find you i mean that is kind of scary(not trying to make more of the situation)...if its like that then i would try to avoid him as much as possible....

 

[Aveena]

I think you should make yourself busy or either go on a small trip so he cant just show up some places that you frequent trying to spot you in the crowd or something....

i mean even if you have a man now i wouldnt change my plans to meet him or for him...

since its like your wrote i would actually be kind of terrified because for him to go thru all that to find you i mean that is kind of scary(not trying to make more of the situation)...if its like that then i would try to avoid him as much as possible....

This is a great idea.... The beach is about 1 1/2 hrs away. I've already taken the days off.... so in theory I can make a day trip out to the beach the day he is here.

Thanks!

 

[ThickHair]

Nothing in your post says that you really want to see this dude other then just being nosey about his life. Tell him you do not think it is a good idea and hand up. You do not have to explain anything to him. If you start heming and hawing you are going to open up a whole can of worms. Be done with him.

 

[Aveena]

Nothing in your post says that you really want to see this dude other then just being nosey about his life. Tell him you do not think it is a good idea and hand up. You do not have to explain anything to him. If you start heming and hawing you are going to open up a whole can of worms. Be done with him.

I really don't want to see him I'm going to be tested big time when he calls me back. I'm going to have to be stronger than ever. It just brings back some very insecure and bad memories of a person I no longer am.

 

[NessaNessa]

Tell him you're busy that day...with your man. You arent obligated to spend any of your time with that man. You may have another instance of 'The attcking bush'

 

[Aveena]

I couldn't believe he was actually in the bushes waiting for me that was one of the WILDEST days in my life!!

 

[ThickHair]

I really don't want to see him I'm going to be tested big time when he calls me back. I'm going to have to be stronger than ever. It just brings back some very insecure and bad memories of a person I no longer am.

If you know that number then don't even answer.

What I have done with my cellphone is that I have a few undesireables programed into my phone so instead of their names coming up, "Big Loser", "Liar" and "Stupid A$$" pop up and I rememeber why I don't want to talk to them. I have a chuckle and let it go to voicemail. Works wonders and I really feel empowered that I did not talk to them.

 

[Aveena]

If you know that number then don't even answer.

What I have done with my cellphone is that I have a few undesireables programed into my phone so instead of their names coming up, "Big Loser", "Liar" and "Stupid A$$" pop up and I rememeber why I don't want to talk to them. I have a chuckle and let it go to voicemail. Works wonders and I really feel empowered that I did not talk to them.

hehe.. that's funny. His number popped up as "private" but he is the only "private" that called so I'lll know it's him

 

[Honey6928215]

I wouldn't even bother to see him. He's trying to get with you since now that he's married and want to have a fling. Next time he calls tell him we we can meet as long as he brings his wife!

You will probably won't hear from him again.

 

[Aveena]

Thanks for all the replies ladies. These ideas will really help me with this situation.