I figured out what is going on. Um I did some searches and realized that my hair is holding to much protein. I'm abusing a few products (mainly two). So according to this thread and this one what I need to do is lots of DC'ing and adding moisture to balance things out, but I thought that's what I was doing with the co-washing
honey, that is the same problem i had when i wrote about that perm disaster! i so know how you feel!
that's the reason why i was dc'ing every single night, and not only was it not too much for my hair, i strongly believe that having done that is the only reason i can now get a comb through my hair.
it took 3 nights of intense work. i mean i would not even TRY to get a comb through my hair. the first time i heard that ripping sound, i knew i had to put the comb down and not even eye a brush (which i usually don't hardly use anyway). i finger detangled after rinsing my dc's out, so it was intense work and time consuming.
i'm still adding things like avocado oil and glycerine to my dc's to pump up the moisture and slip, and yes, co-washing daily is helping, but not only, i also bag every single night.
i wouldn't think of depriving my hair of all that much needed heat during my sleep which used to mean sweated out, puffy hair before, but now it means getting a steam treatment "au naturale" overnight. i only bun anyways.
taking the bag off in the morning, my hair feels damp and manegable, but i wait until it dries to see what its true condition is. if it passes the "soft test" dry, then its ok.
i also strongly agree with what one of the ladies on those threads wrote about looking at the product ingredients.
that is fundamental (at least for my hair type and the hard water conditions here) because if i dared to use somethiing with a cone or petrolatum in it, i might actually have started thinking my hair was healed and back to normal before it truly was .
those things only coat the hair and i needed to know my hair was healthy from the inside out. not just the top layer.
i'm so glad you found out which two products you were using too much of and are on the road to fixng that dangerous protein overload! congratulations!