Anyone Prefer NOT to date Black men? (Just Curious)

[cocoberry10]

Also posted in Off Topic
Hey Ladies:

I am curious, are there any of you out there that DO NOT date Black men? If so, why?

All these race threads could throw any of us in a tail spin. I've read several threads over my years here at LHCF about all these so-called Black men that have written off dating Black women (I think this is the minority in my personal opinion). However, I haven't seen a thread discussing those that do so in reverse. Me personally, I prefer Black men, but have dated outside the race. I believe there are attractive and unattractive people in each race, so I'm going to date whoever I want. From most of the posts I've read of those in interracial relationships, it seems that most of you are either totally opposed to it, or open to it, but still prefer to date Black men (or at least do). This thread is for those that have written off Black men altogether (or almost)!

For example, a good friend of mine has NEVER dated Black men. She claims it's nothing personal, but that overall, she just doesn't really find most of them physically appealing. She's physically beautiful and can attract any type of man she wants, and doesn't seem to hold a grudge towards Black men, yet she just doesn't go there. And it's not a complexion thing, b/c some of the few Black men she finds attractive vary in color (i.e. Shemar Moore, but also Idris Elba).

I hope this thread can stay civil

I just like asking strange questions (as many of you already know) and this one popped in my head, so I'm asking!

 

[esoterica]

i think everybody is scared coco!

 

[TigerSong]

Wow the part about your friend describes me exactly! I really just don't take it there. For me I feel that most Black men are too foward; like it's a GIVEN that in a place full of other races the only obvious choice is them. I call it the "matching pair" assumption. If I had a dollar for everytime a black man in a club has come up to me and asked why I would talk to a guy of another race but not give him the time of day. It's just a matter of not seeing anything appealing in their demeanor.
I also find that a lot of black men like to "lay it out there". As in "Hi, I own my own home, I make this much money and I have no kids. How YOU doin'?" That just doesn't appealto me. If more black guys acted like "normal people" and simply addressed me as another human being not as a "beautiful black woman" or a "Nubian Princess" or "Shawtay" and started off with "Hi, - insert question guys ask to make it seem like they are intersted in something other than sex" then I might give dating black guys a chance. Maybe it's just the Southern black guys who act this way, but it's a turn off.

 

[esoterica]

simply addressed me as another human being not as a "beautiful black woman" or a "Nubian Princess" or "Shawtay".....

i never did understand the need to point out blackness in a compliment. i'd rather just been a beautiful woman full stop. like every other bloody woman on the planet.

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

i never did understand the need to point out blackness in a compliment. i'd rather just been a beautiful woman full stop. like every other bloody woman on the planet.

I agree.

There were times I chose not to go there with Black men. I was treated mean by them growing up, and dismissed and ignored until the "thick" thing became in style (thanks Mel Ford). Outside of that, I think there are too many who DON'T approach me because they think I want a certain type (thug) when I don't; it's just what they observe watching the wrong Black women in general. The ones who do approach me never seem to have common sense... They think they can treat life like a rap video...and tell you all kinds of things. Others straight up think it's cool to let you know they only have one thing on their mind and if you're not with it, they wanna keep walking... Well have a nice walk sweetie.

 

[belleama]

Wow the part about your friend describes me exactly! I really just don't take it there. For me I feel that most Black men are too foward; like it's a GIVEN that in a place full of other races the only obvious choice is them. I call it the "matching pair" assumption. If I had a dollar for everytime a black man in a club has come up to me and asked why I would talk to a guy of another race but not give him the time of day. It's just a matter of not seeing anything appealing in their demeanor.
I also find that a lot of black men like to "lay it out there". As in "Hi, I own my own home, I make this much money and I have no kids. How YOU doin'?" That just doesn't appealto me. If more black guys acted like "normal people" and simply addressed me as another human being not as a "beautiful black woman" or a "Nubian Princess" or "Shawtay" and started off with "Hi, - insert question guys ask to make it seem like they are intersted in something other than sex" then I might give dating black guys a chance. Maybe it's just the Southern black guys who act this way, but it's a turn off.

Ditto to everything except add in Northern black guys and subtract the owning, making decent money, and add a few kids. Seriously most of these dudes don't own nothing but the wallet in their pockets. Maybe not even that, it could be a rubber band you know.

 

[Jessica Rabbit]

Ditto to everything except add in Northern black guys and subtract the owning, making decent money, and add a few kids. Seriously most of these dudes don't own nothing but the wallet in their pockets. Maybe not even that, it could be a rubber band you know.

I think most is kind of harsh and a rash generalization.

 

[belleama]

I think most is kind of harsh and a rash generalization.

Okay sorry about that. I'll stop giving my personal opinions or experiences when asked.

 

[mnemosyne]

deja vu! I'm glad I saw the "also posted in Off Topic" I thought the thread had all its replies deleted.

 

[drasgrl]

Every body has a chance with me but for me it's about what I'm attracted to physically at first. Sure there are black guys that I think are very attractive. But I am more attracted to Filipino and Spanish/Latin looking men. My first crush was on a Mexican boy in middle school so from that my preference has been for those types.

It just happened that the guys who approached me and the ones I had relationships with weren't black. Although I have dated a few black guys I've never had a serious relationship with one. I have nothing against black men.

I'm an international lover. I've dated enough of the world to realize regardless of race that men are men. If I did meet a black guy that was interested in me and I was interested in him I'm not going to say I'm not dating him because he's black but I'm perfectly fine with my Asian man so that's doubtful. At this point I've been dating outside my "race" for so long that I really don't even think about being with a black man.

 

[cocoberry10]

i think everybody is scared coco!

Don't be scurrrrrrrrrrred

 

[cocoberry10]

Every body has a chance with me but for me it's about what I'm attracted to physically at first. Sure there are black guys that I think are very attractive. But I am more attracted to Filipino and Spanish/Latin looking men. My first crush was on a Mexican boy in middle school so from that my preference has been for those types.

It just happened that the guys who approached me and the ones I had relationships with weren't black. Although I have dated a few black guys I've never had a serious relationship with one. I have nothing against black men.

I'm an international lover. I've dated enough of the world to realize regardless of race that men are men. If I did meet a black guy that was interested in me and I was interested in him I'm not going to say I'm not dating him because he's black but I'm perfectly fine with my Asian man so that's doubtful. At this point I've been dating outside my "race" for so long that I really don't even think about being with a black man.

This is an honest answer. I think that some women (and men) feel like you, but they are afraid to say it.

I love all kinds of men. From Idris Elba to someone like Antonio Sabato, Jr. However, if you have a very specific type, I think that's okay. I just wish more people would be open and honest about it like you.

Like, SOME Black guys who have a preference for Latina or Asian women, but instead of admitting that, they will say "all Black girls have attitudes," etc. Just be honest! Lots of feelings would be preserved this way!

 

[cocoberry10]

Bumping for cieramichele (after her Jungle Fever thread)

 

[cieramichele]

Also posted in Off Topic
Hey Ladies:

I am curious, are there any of you out there that DO NOT date Black men? If so, why?

All these race threads could throw any of us in a tail spin. I've read several threads over my years here at LHCF about all these so-called Black men that have written off dating Black women (I think this is the minority in my personal opinion). However, I haven't seen a thread discussing those that do so in reverse. Me personally, I prefer Black men, but have dated outside the race. I believe there are attractive and unattractive people in each race, so I'm going to date whoever I want. From most of the posts I've read of those in interracial relationships, it seems that most of you are either totally opposed to it, or open to it, but still prefer to date Black men (or at least do). This thread is for those that have written off Black men altogether (or almost)!

For example, a good friend of mine has NEVER dated Black men. She claims it's nothing personal, but that overall, she just doesn't really find most of them physically appealing. She's physically beautiful and can attract any type of man she wants, and doesn't seem to hold a grudge towards Black men, yet she just doesn't go there. And it's not a complexion thing, b/c some of the few Black men she finds attractive vary in color (i.e. Shemar Moore, but also Idris Elba).

I hope this thread can stay civil

I just like asking strange questions (as many of you already know) and this one popped in my head, so I'm asking!

And my thing is, I HAVE dated black men but now I chose to date OTHER men. So its not like I havent given them a chance, my preference just changed. Im testing the waters, and I'm LOVING it.

 

[cieramichele]

Bumping for cieramichele (after her Jungle Fever thread)

lol im here!

 

[cocoberry10]

lol im here!