2014 What's Happening in Our Relationships?

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I posted up thread that he stated he didn't know if he could give me what I want etc. Before I asked for explanation, I jumped on LHCF all in my feelings.
We talked about various things and of course he was primarily referring to my 'wall.' We're better now, getting ready to go dancing.

Oh one of the things we talked about was, me being 'messy.' He said *giggle*
we need a cleaning lady because I'm not going to keep putting things back in place without you making an effort to do better blah blah blah and then added and I'm not going to be cooking every other day blah blah blah....can I tell you all I busted out laughing! he sounded like what a woman IMO. It was a little bit of a turn off but cute because clearly he's planning/managing our future together.

But really, do messy people truly change?
 
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:love:
 
The best weekend ever.....
Dinner, theatre, wine bar, another wine bar and our first time dancing together - he can dance yay!

This morning I'm waiting for my breakfast in bed.....then we plan to hit his local market.

I cannot complain.
 
We had an amazing 9 days together! 6 days in kauai, Hawaii and 3 days in Vegas for my birthday. I am so in love with him and now I miss him already.
 
Everything has been going great until a female called three times while he was sleep. It was 3am. I'm a light sleeper. It took everything in me not to answer the phone...

I didn't mention it the next day because things have been near perfect and I didn't know how to bring it up, but now I can't stop thinking who/what/why.
 
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Fine 4s said:
I posted up thread that he stated he didn't know if he could give me what I want etc. Before I asked for explanation, I jumped on LHCF all in my feelings.
We talked about various things and of course he was primarily referring to my 'wall.' We're better now, getting ready to go dancing.

Oh one of the things we talked about was, me being 'messy.' He said *giggle*
we need a cleaning lady because I'm not going to keep putting things back in place without you making an effort to do better blah blah blah and then added and I'm not going to be cooking every other day blah blah blah....can I tell you all I busted out laughing! he sounded like what a woman IMO. It was a little bit of a turn off but cute because clearly he's planning/managing our future together.

But really, do messy people truly change?
Click to expand...
:lol:The bolded

I think messy folks can contain it. I for example am married to the most organized/cleanliness-obsessed man ever...and I'm very unlike him in this regard. It's funny because sometimes I think that I've changed and I'm not as disorganized anymore, but as soon as I have the house to myself I quickly realize that it is not at all so. Lol!

Very domestic men can seem kinda feminine sometimes.. two weeks ago DH and I were having dinner with his parents and his mom mentioned having a million clothes to iron, and DH exhaled and said ":( ...me too." :lachen:
 
PlainJane said:
Everything has been going great until a female called three times while he was sleep. It was 3am. I'm a light sleeper. It took everything in me not to answer the phone...

I didn't mention it the next day because things have been near perfect and I didn't know how to bring it up, but now I can't stop thinking who/what/why.
Click to expand...

Damn, yeah I hate having my feathers ruffled and not doing anything and acting like your fine. That's when you eventually explode one day off the simplest thing
 
My husband does the laundry :lol:

I mean, that's his one and main in-house duty. I literally do everything else cleaning wise.

But yeah. DH is very proud that he does the laundry. :look:

I'm not the neatest person in the world and neither is he but we both pick up after ourselves so that helps.

Getting the house duties down can be a big deal if they never get worked out.

I had a cleaning lady come in a few times earlier this year because I didn't want to do scrubbing and stuff.

Turns out I clean better than she does :ohwell: So, I just went ahead and started doing it myself again. But, if I could find someone who cleaned well I would hire them at least 2 times a month and free me up to do other things that I enjoy doing.
 
Amarilles

That ironing comment was FUNNY. Bless his heart :lachen:
I need to de-clutter my room, my closets, my basement ugh (one of the items on my goal list). And I want to do this before someone moves in with me (as a couple, not a roommate) or before having a baby (if ever I do). I feel like that's an example of my being 'ready.' Don't know how that got in my head.

For example instead of picking up, I'm home, in bed on this 'puter. I just don't prefer to do it! I can hide it throughout the house but it's mainly my bedroom.

It was very un-manly when he was complaining. The day before, I had to go to work while he had the day off. He stated that he wanted to stay back and clean my room. I thought it was an 'excuse' to stay at my place or worse, to read my diary. He kept asking me are you going to try and keep it that way? I couldn't lie. Like why ask a messy person if they are going to keep a room clean when you KNOW darn well I can't. I noticed he had a bit of a 'tude but I honestly had no idea it bothered him so much lmao!

I'm very sensitive to unmanliness except for emotions and tears. I don't mind that. Anyway, I want to improve...I just won't tell him that. Nobody puts baby in the corner! :look:
 
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Fine 4s said:
Amarilles

That ironing comment was FUNNY. Bless his heart :lachen:
I need to de-clutter my room, my closets, my basement ugh (one of the items on my goal list). And I want to do this before someone moves in with me (as a couple, not a roommate) or before having a baby (if ever I do). I feel like that's an example of my being 'ready.' Don't know how that got in my head.

For example instead of picking up, I'm home, in bed on this 'puter. I just don't prefer to do it! I can hide it throughout the house but it's mainly my bedroom.

It was very un-manly when he was complaining. The day before, I had to go to work while he had the day off. He stated that he wanted to stay back and clean my room. I thought it was an 'excuse' to stay at my place or worse, to read my diary. He kept asking me are you going to try and keep it that way? I couldn't lie. Like why ask a messy person if they are going to keep a room clean when you KNOW darn well I can't. I noticed he had a bit of a 'tude but I honestly had no idea it bothered him so much lmao!

I'm very sensitive to unmanliness except for emotions and tears. I don't mind that. Anyway, I want to improve...I just won't tell him that. Nobody puts baby in the corner! :look:
Click to expand...


LMAO. My ex-boo made my bed. All the time. Even taught me how he did it because he knows if I had my way, I'd never make my bed (for what? I'm getting right back in it later). He also washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen whenever I cooked. He also helped me put away my laundry (because I hate doing it). Thing is, I'm not messy. Just....not OCD clean. One time I was sick and he dropped by to bring me medicine and saw how messy my apartment was. He made one comment to the effect of "Damn girl, you must really be sick, I've never seen your place this messy". You better believe that fever and all I made sure my place was tidied up by the next time he dropped by.


My long ago ex used to do my laundry, make my bed and iron my clothes.

...maybe I am that messy because all my men seem to most of my chores for me lol
 
I've been lurking this thread for a while but I'm finally going to join in the conversation.

My boyfriend and I had been living together for about two months and I just moved out of his house last night.

We are still together but he said he likes his personal space :-/

I won't even lie I feel some type of way about it but he's been living alone for like 7 years now so I guess it was too much for him right now
 
^^are the two of you planning on marriage? if so, does he plan to maintain separate homes?
 
Him asking you to move out was a negative move in the relationship. First nail in the coffin...imo of course.
 
I actually like a man that is domestic because that means I don't have to always clean or cook everything or be expected to. It's actually a turn off when they don't show that ability.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
NaturallyBri87 did he ask you to move in with him? The positive side is that he acknowledged this 2 months in vs two years in.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
He's soooo whipped....I turn in my sleep he wakes up "I love you baby". I toss again "I love you baby, you love me?" LMAO! A little morning....u know and it's "you got me whipped' blah blah blah.

I have NEVER EVER EVER had someone so expressive (saj). I'll admit, a little uhm girlie but you know, it feels really good to know and feel like the person sees NO NO NO NO ONE else but you....*singing* "cuz I only have eyes for you...."

My emotions need to catch up.
 
We had such an awesome time preparing for and celebrating Thanksgiving together. We are looking forward to doing the same for Christmas and New Year's. :yay:
 
Bublin said:
Him asking you to move out was a negative move in the relationship. First nail in the coffin...imo of course.
Click to expand...

I felt the same way at first and communicated that to him. He felt as though we wouldn't last if we continued to live together (things were going well in my opinion). And the best/funniest response from him was "we shouldn't be living together out of wedlock anyway".....but it's okay for us to do other things out of wedlock :perplexed

Oasis said:
^^are the two of you planning on marriage? if so, does he plan to maintain separate homes?
Click to expand...

We are both two years shy of thirty so marriage is on the agenda and is something he discussed. And I actually asked him something along those lines of separate homes/spaces and he gave me some goofy answer about how he can't answer a hypothetical questions like that. I let it go for the time being but the discussion will be had again.

tinkat said:
NaturallyBri87 did he ask you to move in with him? The positive side is that he acknowledged this 2 months in vs two years in.

Wait, be positive, keep believing, and all will surely be yours. Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
Click to expand...

He did. And yeah I guess it's better than he did it now verses living together for years and him asking me to leave. Other than that things have been going fairly well in the relationship. I guess living together was a lot more that he thought it would be and he wasn't ready for it. Staying positive
 
I wouldn't be able to stay. The relationship would be over the second I got my last item out of the home. That is very very suspicious and something I would suck up if I was the person who felt "I needed my personal space" 2.5 years in. I can't imagine making my long term partner move out unless I was trying to bring new chicks in.
 
Hmmm...I'm not sure about what it all means but I know for sure I'd be hurt and wouldn't dare think about moving in together without a ring and I don't mean an engagement ring either.

My ex and his ex had moved in together. 6 months later she was gone per his request. After we broke up, heard they were together again (off and on) and last I heard, she was pushing to move in and wouldn't you know it....they are broken up again.
In HIS case it's clear that he has limits with her. Been there done that, didn't work...
In YOUR case, I'm thinking maybe he's scared it's moving too fast? IDK.
I just don't think that someone who changes his mind has something up his sleeve. However, the damage caused by this action (assuming you are hurt by it) can weaken the relationship and would affect my level of security and trust.

I hope you two figure it out and make peace with the decision ((HUG))
 
Mortons said:
I wouldn't be able to stay. The relationship would be over the second I got my last item out of the home. That is very very suspicious and something I would suck up if I was the person who felt "I needed my personal space" 2.5 years in. I can't imagine making my long term partner move out unless I was trying to bring new chicks in.
Click to expand...

:yep:

Be careful NaturallyBri87. Something in the milk ain't clean. :nono:
 
you ask me to move in and then ask me to move out in 60 days..pushing 30 been together 2 yrs..hell to the mutha bleeping-nah bro--


these dudes out here are for real...what in the lords name and that is okay with the woman in his life...no! no!!! no way on gods green earth!!!:nono:

exits thread..blood pressure rising...

eta--ladies I just want us to understand our worth and want more for ourselves...thats really what it comes down to for me--we control our situation and when you love yourself you dont accept any ole treatment...





MzLady78 said:
:yep:

Be careful NaturallyBri87. Something in the milk ain't clean. :nono:
Click to expand...
 
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