2014 What's Happening in Our Relationships?
- Thread starter crlsweetie912
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Holla
You should invite her to join this lovely forum.
You should invite her to join this lovely forum.
I need to vent and I wasn't sure what thread so this will have to do.
This is not about me.
I have been hearing about someone's relationship and I am disgusted. My initial reaction to all of this: at what point do you demand better for yourself? I mean where is your self-respect? Not to mention demanding respect from others!
So here goes.
Dating Black couple. Everyone is well-educated, good backgrounds, good on paper, both come from two-parent homes, yada, yada. Dating for about a year I think. They have had their ups and downs with random bs (like throwing gift to her halfway across the room in front of her family instead of handing it to her like everyone else). I would have dropped kicked him a LONG time ago but that is another story.
While they were around her family recently, dude had a runny nose. He kept wiping his nose on his sleeve. When his sleeve was no longer satisfactory to him, he wiped his snot on her. (<--YES!!!!! You read that correctly!)
That is just nasty! I am livid and he didn't even do it to me! Yet, she is still dating him and hoping for a ring. Her brother said something to him about it but half-heartedly. Her father didn't see it and didn't know until after they left town apparently.
He has done other random BS that every time I hear about the latest thing he did, I think "that took the cake" but after the snot incident, I can't believe she is still with him! I can't get it out of my mind that a grown assss man would do something like that and that a grown assss woman would put up with it.
I have spoken to someone close to her (bc I don't know her that well) and told them to step up for her. That even if she doesn't demand respect for herself, her friends/family should demand it for her! If our friendship is over bc you feel I overstepped some ridiculous bounds, fine but I will not be silent about other people being treated badly, esp. people I care about.
I am too through with their situation and lightweight don't even want to hear anymore about it bc everyone involved (incl. her people) are at fault at this point for witnessing this and not saying something.erplexed
Lilmama1011
Well-Known Member
Holla
Well-Known Member
I wasn't there but after all the other dumb ish I heard about him, I believe it all the more.
That is a good idea! I usually only refer folks to LHCF for hair stuff but quite a few women would be elevated if they checked out the relationship forum. Some days, I am tired of being the one to demand that people raise their own standards. Y'all can tell them
HollaThat is a good idea! I usually only refer folks to LHCF for hair stuff but quite a few women would be elevated if they checked out the relationship forum. Some days, I am tired of being the one to demand that people raise their own standards. Y'all can tell them
If people don't want certain things for themselves, then that's on them. I know of people that don't want good for themselves, but I just let them be. You can lead the horse to the water..... you get the point. Girl, this is a new year. Let them be, and do you. It's easier.
.:Eden:.
Well-Known Member
I just had the chance to finally open the Christmas present he gave me (5days late btw). He have me a jar with 63 carefully folded hand written notes. The notes range from being sweet, romantic, funny, encouraging, loving, inspirational etc.
I'm a sap for cheesy and sentimental gestures and I really loved this. I cried the whole time opening all the notes.
One of the notes said:
"I love your hair.
It's beautiful.
It's shiny.
It's natural.
and it's attached to your scalp." Lol!!!
I'm a sap for cheesy and sentimental gestures and I really loved this. I cried the whole time opening all the notes.
One of the notes said:
"I love your hair.
It's beautiful.
It's shiny.
It's natural.
and it's attached to your scalp." Lol!!!
LadyBugsy
Well-Known Member
I feel it was inconsiderate.
LadyBugsy
Well-Known Member
His birthday is in a few weeks and I have already purchased his gift. I am tempted to give it to him and break up!
dede1129
Well-Known Member
Why would you give him a gift if you are going to break up? Also, don't make permanent decisions on temporary feelings because you may regret it later. Think about if this is really about the gift or something bigger. It seems irrational to break up solely because of a monetary gift. There has to be more in my opinion.
LadyBugsy
Well-Known Member
I don't want to keep the gift and it would be a hassle to return it. To be honest, I lowered my standards to date him and he is a constant disappointment. This incident was the "straw" ...
dede1129
Well-Known Member
Oooooooooh ok I can understand that. Well if you are aware of the issue and this is further confirmation then you know what you need to do. Glad you are not ignoring the signs
NappyNelle
Kinky Coily 4A, Fine Strands, WSL
LadyBugsy This is incredibly inconsiderate and he would not be my boyfriend anymore. There are three days in the year that I would expect some token of your affection: Valentine's day, my birthday, and Christmas. Unless he was in jail or in a war zone, he has no excuse.
ETA: Ugh and with those updates... he is not worthy of being your boyfriend! Why are you settling for someone you don't think is good enough for you? I've been there and done that and NOPE. NEVER AGAIN.
NappyNelle
Kinky Coily 4A, Fine Strands, WSL
And somebody make the 2015 thread while it's still January 1st.
Oasis
grabbing life by the pussy
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