B
Bublnbrnsuga
Guest
imstush said:
No, I wont' be married until February. Don't worry about being married, it will come in due season
Princess4real
Well-Known Member
I like my maiden name better than my married name. It seem's like everybody and their mother has my married last name. I use both Stephanie Garica-Rodriguez.
Girl, I'm only playing those are not my last names, but I just wanted you to give you a visual. I hope I made you laugh and I hope this helps.
Girl, I'm only playing those are not my last names, but I just wanted you to give you a visual. I hope I made you laugh and I hope this helps.I'm not married (hopefully soon or my mom is going to bust) yet. But it's funny, when I was younger I just knew I would keep my name or at the very least hyphenate. As I've gotten older I've found that I have become more old fashioned in my perspective in views on marriage. However, since my dad passed away a few months ago apart of me really wants to keep my name, because it's my daddy's name. Ya know?
B
Bublnbrnsuga
Guest
Okay, after a serious discussion with the fiance about how I just don't feel like going through the process of changing my name, but I will do it, he got a little heated. He didn't see what the big deal was, and maybe there isn't but I just don't feel like doing it. He was like, what reason would a woman have to keep her maiden name? Did he not hear me say I would change my name without hesitancy,just that the process makes me despise it?
L
lkg4healthyhair
Guest
Bublnbrnsuga said:Okay, after a serious discussion with the fiance about how I just don't feel like going through the process of changing my name, but I will do it, he got a little heated. He didn't see what the big deal was, and maybe there isn't but I just don't feel like doing it. He was like, what reason would a woman have to keep her maiden name? Did he not hear me say I would change my name without hesitancy,just that the process makes me despise it?
Most women I know tell me their husbands were not happy with the idea of them keeping their maiden names. Personally I think it is a personal choice of the woman because she has to do all the changing, and what's wrong with keeping your name if you want to?...doesn't change your marriage. People can still call you Mrs. XYZ if they want.
I did hypenate my name on my drivers license. DMV is not fun but that was all I did.
Maybe he could stand in line for you etc in DMV and SS the call you on your cell phone when its your turn in line.....you could chil in the car and relax until then
Supergirl
With Love & Silk
Bubblin,
It's not that hard. You can actually mail your documents in with your SS application to the SS administration and they will send you your document (marriage license) back and your new card. So that way you don't have to wait in a long line.
I haven't gotten my driver's license and credit card accounts changed yet, but to me getting the ss card changed is most important.
Change the name girl. I know you are a Believer and the Word says the two shall become one. I once heard a good pastor say "the two shall become one, not hyphenated." I believe that the name change is a big symbol of you uniting with your husband. I'll be honest, though I couldn't wait to take my husband's last name it has been the most difficult thing about being married IMO. You're used to being called one thing for twenty something years and then all of a sudden you are called something else and you see your first name on paper with this new last name. It is a trip!
Not that you become a different person or anything.
It's not that hard. You can actually mail your documents in with your SS application to the SS administration and they will send you your document (marriage license) back and your new card. So that way you don't have to wait in a long line.
I haven't gotten my driver's license and credit card accounts changed yet, but to me getting the ss card changed is most important.
Change the name girl. I know you are a Believer and the Word says the two shall become one. I once heard a good pastor say "the two shall become one, not hyphenated." I believe that the name change is a big symbol of you uniting with your husband. I'll be honest, though I couldn't wait to take my husband's last name it has been the most difficult thing about being married IMO. You're used to being called one thing for twenty something years and then all of a sudden you are called something else and you see your first name on paper with this new last name. It is a trip!
Not that you become a different person or anything.
CandiceC
.
Supergirl said:Bubblin,
It's not that hard. You can actually mail your documents in with your SS application to the SS administration and they will send you your document (marriage license) back and your new card. So that way you don't have to wait in a long line.
I haven't gotten my driver's license and credit card accounts changed yet, but to me getting the ss card changed is most important.
Change the name girl. I know you are a Believer and the Word says the two shall become one. I once heard a good pastor say "the two shall become one, not hyphenated." I believe that the name change is a big symbol of you uniting with your husband. I'll be honest, though I couldn't wait to take my husband's last name it has been the most difficult thing about being married IMO. You're used to being called one thing for twenty something years and then all of a sudden you are called something else and you see your first name on paper with this new last name. It is a trip!
Not that you become a different person or anything.
I agree. I smile each time I think about my DH and I having the same last name and being part of one unit.
NewYorkgyrl
Well-Known Member
IF I ever get married I will NOT change my name. I do believe that when you get married you become one. Name chaning or not changing your name has no effect on that belief. I don't believe they have anything to do with each other.
When 2 become one it is basically like you are thinking of "US", not "me and you", or "me THEN you". What is mine is yours and what is yours is mine. THAT to me, is 2 becoming 1. Society has stuck the idea of name changing into everyone's head. If changing your name was one way to become "one" then why does it only seem to go one way with one person sacrificing (the woman changes).
Marriage is a blessing but I don't think you should loose yourself in the process. You add to the other person's qualities to become ONE.
This is just my opinion. For those that have changed their name. Good for you. My mother changed her name. But then again her and her family were not as TIGHT and FAMILY ORIENTED as the family her and my father had togther. My family is so loving and tight we share everything (immediate:mother, father and siblings) I cannot see myself changing this important name and the pride that goes along saying it for someone else's name that represents someone else's joy, pain, struggle, and family.
Plus I want to be a doctor (I'm in a post-bach med program right now) and if iI am not married by then I will be called Dr. (What my last name is now) And I will NOT throw that accomplishment away for someone else's last name. And my FAMILY will be even more proud to say we have a DR.________ in the family. Their last name. (no offense to anyone, sorry for ranting it just seems like alot a people I know think the woman should change)
When 2 become one it is basically like you are thinking of "US", not "me and you", or "me THEN you". What is mine is yours and what is yours is mine. THAT to me, is 2 becoming 1. Society has stuck the idea of name changing into everyone's head. If changing your name was one way to become "one" then why does it only seem to go one way with one person sacrificing (the woman changes).
Marriage is a blessing but I don't think you should loose yourself in the process. You add to the other person's qualities to become ONE.
This is just my opinion. For those that have changed their name. Good for you. My mother changed her name. But then again her and her family were not as TIGHT and FAMILY ORIENTED as the family her and my father had togther. My family is so loving and tight we share everything (immediate:mother, father and siblings) I cannot see myself changing this important name and the pride that goes along saying it for someone else's name that represents someone else's joy, pain, struggle, and family.
Plus I want to be a doctor (I'm in a post-bach med program right now) and if iI am not married by then I will be called Dr. (What my last name is now) And I will NOT throw that accomplishment away for someone else's last name. And my FAMILY will be even more proud to say we have a DR.________ in the family. Their last name. (no offense to anyone, sorry for ranting it just seems like alot a people I know think the woman should change)
NewYorkgyrl said:
Nothing to really be upset over. Its just a choice. If a woman doesn't want to then don't, if she does then do.
Bublnbrnsuga
don't let the process turn u off. Its so simple and doesn't have to be done all at one time.
Also, things we think now, are usually different once you say I do. You feel good, and different and want to bask in married bliss.
NewYorkgyrl
Well-Known Member
sylver2 said:
I'm not upset I am just stating MY opinion. Just because it happens to be the opposite of what the majority thinks does not mean I am upset. Infact I clearly stated that in my post that: "This is just my opinion. For those that have changed their name. Good for you. " But thanks for your concern.
I have a hyphenated name. I changed it with the DMV and Social Security. The social security records should automatically update with IRS. I changed my bank accounts, credit accounts, and frequent flyer accounts over time. I chose the double last name because I'm an only child and I was already established professionally. Your name change will also be picked up from your credit reports when the creditors perform their annual review.
NewYorkgyrl
Well-Known Member
sylver2: Sorry My fault!
MissB: I believe that is what I will do when I become a doctor (hyphenate my name). But only time will tell. Like sylver2 said: things we think now, are usually different once you say I do. But this choice sounds like a reasonable one to me.
MissB: I believe that is what I will do when I become a doctor (hyphenate my name). But only time will tell. Like sylver2 said: things we think now, are usually different once you say I do. But this choice sounds like a reasonable one to me.
brwnskingirl
New Member
I just added on his name no hyphen.
B
Bublnbrnsuga
Guest
Supergirl said:Bubblin,
It's not that hard. You can actually mail your documents in with your SS application to the SS administration and they will send you your document (marriage license) back and your new card. So that way you don't have to wait in a long line.
I haven't gotten my driver's license and credit card accounts changed yet, but to me getting the ss card changed is most important.
Change the name girl. I know you are a Believer and the Word says the two shall become one. I once heard a good pastor say "the two shall become one, not hyphenated." I believe that the name change is a big symbol of you uniting with your husband. I'll be honest, though I couldn't wait to take my husband's last name it has been the most difficult thing about being married IMO. You're used to being called one thing for twenty something years and then all of a sudden you are called something else and you see your first name on paper with this new last name. It is a trip!
Not that you become a different person or anything.
This is exactly what my fiance was saying to me, while he was fussing
I just couldn't phrase it as eloquently as you.
L
lkg4healthyhair
Guest
NewYorkgyrl said:
Nygyrl, I agree. My belief is when you get married you become one emotionally, spritually and a name change should not be a factor. This is my personal choice. I don't feel there is anything wrong with changing your name if that is your choice but I also feel for the women who decide to keep their names it should not be an issue either.
I like my name so I still go by my maiden name. If I didn't like it (and my husbands was better) I would change it. I just think it should not be an issue either way.
I just feel it is a choice not a requirement. A friend of mine told me that in the Bible is says two should become one but I have never read anything about name changing--I always interpreted that to mean spiritually.
NewYorkgyrl
Well-Known Member
This maybe a stupid qestion but does the bible mention ANYTHING about last names?
I don't recall seeing anything all the lines of last names being mention never mind women changing their names. But I could be wrong. Can someone please tell me if this is mentioned exactly (LAST NAME CHANGE)?
I don't recall seeing anything all the lines of last names being mention never mind women changing their names. But I could be wrong. Can someone please tell me if this is mentioned exactly (LAST NAME CHANGE)?
Naijaqueen
New Member
I'm not married but I think it'll be a source of joy, and something any man would want his wife to wear with pride. My mom got married while on her education quest and kept her maiden name till after she got her masters(2yrs post wedding) because her dad had helped her pay for schl, and she wanted the degree to be in her maiden name out of respect for him.
My cousin hyphenated hers, her sister changed hers
B4 i was thinking of hyphenating but if I marry the man in my life right now, I'd be more than proud to be Mrs X. I wish I could make my last name my maiden name, but my middle name was my grandmother's 1st name, and out of respect to her, and to avoid my mom's wrath thats not even an option. If I've a son/sons I might give it to one as a 1st or middle name, cause it was actually my g-grand dad's 1st name anyway.
My cousin hyphenated hers, her sister changed hers
B4 i was thinking of hyphenating but if I marry the man in my life right now, I'd be more than proud to be Mrs X. I wish I could make my last name my maiden name, but my middle name was my grandmother's 1st name, and out of respect to her, and to avoid my mom's wrath thats not even an option. If I've a son/sons I might give it to one as a 1st or middle name, cause it was actually my g-grand dad's 1st name anyway.
B
Bublnbrnsuga
Guest
NewYorkgyrl said:
Hmmm, I don't think it says anything specifically about changing the last name, but I remember in Genesis, Eve was called Mrs. Adam before Adam gave her the name Eve. The man is the head of the household, so it makes sense to take on anything the HOH has. I think it makes men feel more important when one is willing to take on his name
