Would you date a guy who had female roommates?

jennboo

jennboo

Well-Known Member
Or how comfortable would you be with a boyfriend who had female roommates?

I have a close friend who met a guy she apparently really likes. The guy is roomming with two other females. I told my friend i didn't think it was a great idea, but what can she really say to him about it...they aren't exclusive and he has been rooming with these girls since before they met. ALSO..these two females are moving out (short term roomies), and another female is moving in next month. I told her she'll either have to put up with it or just stop seeing him.

I gave her my input, since i dealt with a somewhat similar situation. I was casually dating a guy here in the states who had to abruptly return to his country due to visa reasons. Before he left the US we had agreed to keep in touch, see how things went. I knew deep down it wouldn't work, since i'm not cut out for long distance relationships, but he was pressed on seeing how things went and trying it out. Fine. He wound up finding housing on short notice and had a male roommate and two female roommates. He told me about the roommate situation and i told him if he was trying to make things work with me, that kind of living situation would likely pose a threat ...but of course he told me he wasn't atracted to the females and that nothing would happen yadda yadda. I told him...things happen. He is a bit naive and sheltered, so he couldn't fathom how a relationship could develop between roommates :spinning:. I then get an email from him, maybe 3 weeks later, telling me one of the female roommates kissed him and now they are dating :lol:. I can laugh about it now but i was salty at the time more so about the fact that i TOLD HIM something like this would happen and he just dismissed what i'd said as irrational and impossible.

So what do you ladies think? Have any of you ever been in a situation like this...dating/getting into a relatiohnship with a guy who has a female roommate? What do you feel in general about co-ed roomming?
 
It would be casual... and probably short term. The situation makes me uncomfortable- regardless if its innocent or not.
 
I would be ok with it (assuming we have been together for a while and it is not a brand new relationship).

I either trust you or I don't. You are either going to cheat on me or not. Yes, a female roommate might make it easier for him to cheat, but if you are a cheater you will get it however you can.

If I can't trust you around females when I am not with you, then we can't be together. Without trust, I feel you have nothing.

Now, of course, I would keep my eyes wide open and not fall for the okey doke, but I guess I do that all the time.
 
I had male roommates for years(not all at once, it was always just one guy). My ex boyfriend wasn't happy with it but I was straight up with him from the beginning. He met my roommate at the time and verified himself this guy was a total nerd and there was no way we had something going.:lol: I met their girlfriends and was cool with them. As far as I know none of them had a problem with me. Ain't no way I would have messed with any of them-none of them EVER tried anything with me. Give her a chance to feel the situation out.
 
It reminds me of three's company where none of the girls were feeling Jack. Anyway I dont think I would take a chance.
 
To those who are saying "yes"... can you expound a bit?

mischka, so you don't see anything wrong with it, like, nothing at all? :lol:
 
jennboo said:
To those who are saying "yes"... can you expound a bit?

@mischka, so you don't see anything wrong with it, like, nothing at all? :lol:
Click to expand...

Well I have had male roommates in the past. I don't see a problem with it. My personal opinion is that just because you have roommates of the opposite sex it doesn't mean that you are doing each other.
 
jennboo said:
How is the dynamic between you and the male roommate? Is he attractive?
Click to expand...


The very first male roommate to me was attractive; however, I was not interested in him in that way and I needed a place to stay. We barely saw each other because he's a school teacher and he was over his gf house. We were cool. That's it. Nothing pervy about him.

The second one was in the Navy. I didn't think he was attractive, but I didn't think he was ugly. He was cool esp. because we were both in the navy. He was never there because his ship was about to go on deployment. We had a lot in common. He also had a gf.

The most recent one I have is an older man. He's not attractive:lachen:. No bad vibes or anything.
 
What would be the problem? Just bc they're living together don't mean they have to **** each other unless they both trifling and never been around anyone of the opposite sex before.

Why wouldn't he be able to control himself any differently than the women he would meet at a party, or at work? He has to be around them all the time too and I expect he would have the decency to control himself.

I'm gonna have to cosign the previous poster who said if you can't trust him in that situation or any other then your relationship isn't worth the price of tea in china to begin with.

Now, would I SEEK OUT a guy who lived with women, probably not, but if I met a guy and wanted to date him and he told me he lived with a girl, I wouldn't go oh well now I can't date you.
 
I know many people who have roommates of the opposite sex. In fact, the majority of people I know have roommates of the opposite sex. When people put up those flyers on campus "roommate needed!" most people are just looking for a room; somewhere to put their stuff and sleep sometimes lol. They just live in the same space. They're not close friends, they don't really hang out together, they don't tell each other when they're coming and going, etc. I just don't really see the big deal, based on my personal experiences. Of course things can happen, but in the majority of cases EYE have seen, they're really JUST roommates who don't know each other.

Since you have had a negative experience with this, I understand why you would be against it though.

Now, would I ever room with a guy? Hell no :lol: I'm just not cut out for it lol. But I would (and have) date a guy who had girl roomies.
 
locabouthair said:
It reminds me of three's company where none of the girls were feeling Jack. Anyway I dont think I would take a chance.
Click to expand...


Yeah, but Jack would have hit it anytime they were ready :lol:

Anywho, nope not for me. It would cause a problem and I would opt out of the relationship.

A poster above said something to the affect of 'yeah, if it were a long term relationship'....even MORE NO for me. We got time put in, I'm your woman and all that? No way in hellz you're rooming with another female.
 
My ex live in bf cheated on me he always told his girls I was just a roommate, so my kneejerk reaction is that it's a bad idea!

I guess it *could* be o.k. under certain circumstances. However, I don't think a guy who can't afford his own place is that great of a catch.
 
qchelle said:
Ok, I have a question now: For the people saying no, would you not room with a guy?
Click to expand...

See, i would feel a bit skeeved out rooming with a guy in general, especially if it were only me and the guy living in the apartment. I'd feel a bit better if a girlfriend of mine and i moved in with a guy. I'd probably be paranoid on some level that he was going to molest me or try to or something. I also think it's sort of weird for a young woman to just all willy nilly be roomming with a random guy she doesn't know.

If i had absolutely nowhere to go, and the only option was a male roommate, i'm not going out on the street.
 
And for the people saying that they would not feel any type of way with someone they were dating or a bf having a female roommate...

What if the female roommate were sexy/pretty/cute/had a body etc.?

Like, one day you go to the dude's house and Kenya Moore is chillin' on the couch in poom poom shorts and a tight t-shirt :lol:.

I mean, you couldn't get mad at her style of lounge wear because, afterall, it is her house.
 
I just really don't care about the next chick. It's really irrelevant to me. I can put on my pum pum shorts just like she can so what do I care?
 
mischka said:
I just really don't care about the next chick. It's really irrelevant to me. I can put on my pum pum shorts just like she can so what do I care?
Click to expand...

You are one trustin' woman, lol.

It's not hard to entice men, even if they have an SO :look:...doesn't even really matter if his level of attraction is higher for you (gf/so) than the roommate...

The thing about that next chick is...she is there, day and night, chattin' with your man, laughing together, watching movies, in pajamas...they might want to have a glass of wine in the house, a boob might slip out coming out the shower, etc. I'm getting mad just typing this, lol.

Emotional intimacy can develop very easily in close quarters like that especially if both people are attracted to one another...

I told my friend to get her a hot male roommate, lol.
 
qchelle said:
Ok, I have a question now: For the people saying no, would you not room with a guy?
Click to expand...

Nope. Never have and never will. :nono: I know how that may have looked to a potential mate. It's inappropriate IMO on either side. I would never seriously date any man who was living with a woman other than family members. :nono:

There's a difference between TRUST and plain old STUPIDITY! This is one of those things that don't fall in the area of trust.
 
jennboo said:
You are one trustin' woman, lol.

It's not hard to entice men, even if they have an SO :look:...doesn't even really matter if his level of attraction is higher for you (gf/so) than the roommate...

The thing about that next chick is...she is there, day and night, chattin' with your man, laughing together, watching movies, in pajamas...they might want to have a glass of wine in the house, a boob might slip out coming out the shower, etc. I'm getting mad just typing this, lol.

Emotional intimacy can develop very easily in close quarters like that especially if both people are attracted to one another...

I told my friend to get her a hot male roommate, lol.
Click to expand...

You actually raise a few good points that I don't think people realize. It's not just as simple as trusting someone. Other factors are in play that aren't even necessary. Relationships are hard enough without any extra problems.
 
gabulldawg said:
Nope. Never have and never will. :nono: I know how that may have looked to a potential mate. It's inappropriate IMO on either side. I would never seriously date any man who was living with a woman other than family members. :nono:

There's a difference between TRUST and plain old STUPIDITY! This is one of those things that don't fall in the area of trust.
Click to expand...

I don't think you would have to worry about it. You got you a good man, girlfran.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

L
Would You Date Him??
Replies
6
Views
117
ThatJerseyGirl
ThatJerseyGirl
Poohbear
  • Poll
Would u date a guy that...
2 3 4
Replies
112
Views
2K
Poohbear
Poohbear
Glib Gurl
  • Poll
Would you date a grown man with roommates?
2
Replies
47
Views
1K
kandyland
kandyland
V
Can I get some translation?
Replies
21
Views
325
Vinyl
V
X
He got a date
Replies
25
Views
487
Makenzie
Makenzie
Back
Top