Would you date a guy if you thought or knew he was impotent?

K

Kiadodie

Well-Known Member
I'm asking because there is this guy that is interested in me. I have a feeling he has a MAJOR insecurity and it's past emotional scars, I think he may be impotent. He has EVERYTHING going on for him but knowing this, I'm not sure if I want to go into a deeper relationship w/ him. I know there is medication out there for this but I'm not sure how severe it is. Again, I'm not 100% sure that this is his problem but all his actions point in that direction. :perplexed

Would you date a guy that was impotent? Does anyone know someone that is impotent?
 
Well sex is an important compenent in a relationship. It's not EVERYTHING since you spend a large majority of your relatioinship OUT of the bed but it is amazing how much that time means in the grand scheme of things. If I was MARRIED and my partner inadvertently became impotent, I would deal with that but not to start off a dating relationship. I am not that generous.
 
InvisibleLee said:
Well sex is an important compenent in a relationship. It's not EVERYTHING since you spend a large majority of your relatioinship OUT of the bed but it is amazing how much that time means in the grand scheme of things. If I was MARRIED and my partner inadvertently became impotent, I would deal with that but not to start off a dating relationship. I am not that generous.
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Yeah, that's how I kind of feel. The thing is, he's such a great guy..it's a shame. :nono:
 
InvisibleLee said:
Well sex is an important compenent in a relationship. It's not EVERYTHING since you spend a large majority of your relatioinship OUT of the bed but it is amazing how much that time means in the grand scheme of things. If I was MARRIED and my partner inadvertently became impotent,I would deal with that but not to start off a dating relationship. I am not that generous.
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ITA with this statement. Intimacy.......physical/emotional go hand in hand and is very important.........to have one without the other will hinder the relationship.....IMO

So that is a no go for me with a impotent man.:nono:
 
InvisibleLee said:
Well sex is an important compenent in a relationship. It's not EVERYTHING since you spend a large majority of your relatioinship OUT of the bed but it is amazing how much that time means in the grand scheme of things. If I was MARRIED and my partner inadvertently became impotent, I would deal with that but not to start off a dating relationship. I am not that generous.
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Exactly:yep::yep:

OP--How do you know he might have this problem? Are you pretty sure or just some rumor he can't get it up or what? I'm being serious, sorry.
 
kia said:
I'm asking because there is this guy that is interested in me. I have a feeling he has a MAJOR insecurity and it's past emotional scars, I think he may be impotent. He has EVERYTHING going on for him but knowing this, I'm not sure if I want to go into a deeper relationship w/ him. I know there is medication out there for this but I'm not sure how severe it is. Again, I'm not 100% sure that this is his problem but all his actions point in that direction. :perplexed

Would you date a guy that was impotent? Does anyone know someone that is impotent?
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Are you saying he may have baggage associated with his "condition" that he may take out on you? If so, I wouldn't even get the point where his impotency could pose a problem because this would stop me in my tracks. :nono: To answer your question, as long as a man was working to resolve the problem, not taking his frustations out on me, and willing to use alternative methods of intimacy, I think I could make it work.
 
Devil No!

Go into a new relationship with an impotent guy? No
Married to a guy who eventually becomes impotent? We'll deal with it together
 
MizAvalon said:
No, I couldn't.:nono:

What has he said to make you think he may be impotent?
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Well, he hasnt' really but all the sign are there. He wants to pursue but yet he stops dead in his tracks yet he gives me signs that he wants to. He doesn't have a girlfriend for sure and he's not gay. He's very good looking and yet he doesn't even play around as men usually do (for sex). So when I asked about 3 different men what they thought, they said he has some kind of insecurity...most probably concerning sex. Whether he's impotent or not I don't know but I know that even a man that was hurt emotioinally will still hunt a girl for sex at least. He doesn't do that at all with anyone, he mostly stays to himself. :perplexed
 
kia said:
Well, he hasnt' really but all the sign are there. He wants to pursue but yet he stops dead in his tracks yet he gives me signs that he wants to. He doesn't have a girlfriend for sure and he's not gay. He's very good looking and yet he doesn't even play around as men usually do (for sex). So when I asked about 3 different men what they thought, they said he has some kind of insecurity...most probably concerning sex. Whether he's impotent or not I don't know but I know that even a man that was hurt emotioinally will still hunt a girl for sex at least. He doesn't do that at all with anyone, he mostly stays to himself. :perplexed
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Premature Ejaculation maybe?

Is he religious or a virgin? Maybe he feels guilty about having lustful thoughts and stops himself?

IDK, I'm just trying to help the poor guy out a little.
 
MizAvalon said:
Premature Ejaculation maybe?

Is he religious or a virgin? Maybe he feels guilty about having lustful thoughts and stops himself?

IDK, I'm just trying to help the poor guy out a little.
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No, he's not a virgin from what his friend tells me (cause he said he had ONE girlfriend in college). He's a christian but not too religious. I mean, he was a football player in college and only had one girlfriend that his good friend knows of in his whole life. He's 31 for goodness sakes. :wallbash:

Even my brother the most nicest guy loves women & sex. :perplexed I asked his very good friend about him (not about being impotent)..but just in general. He said he's very disciplined and he doesn't go after girls w/ lust. HE likes a girl that are intelligent. Ok, that's good and all but it STILL doesn't explain he's always by himself. He did tell me he's scared..but why???? :perplexed So fustrating cuase I really like him but Im scared impotency may be the case.
 
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kia said:
No, he's not a virgin from what his friend tells me (cause he said he had ONE girlfriend in college). He's a christian but not too religious. I mean, he was a football player in college and only had one girlfriend that his good friend knows of in his whole life. He's 31 for goodness sakes. :wallbash:

Even my brother the most nicest guy loves women & sex. :perplexed I asked his very good friend about him (not about being impotent)..but just in general. He said he's very disciplined and he doesn't go after girls w/ lust. HE likes a girl that are intelligent. Ok, that's good and all but it STILL doesn't explain he's always by himself. He did tell me he's scared..but why???? :perplexed So fustrating cuase I really like him but Im scared impotency may be the case.
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Has he been hurt by women in the past?
Do you think someone may have made fun of his sexual abillities?
Was he sexually abuses as a child?
 
LunadeMiel said:
Has he been hurt by women in the past?
Do you think someone may have made fun of his sexual abillities?
Was he sexually abuses as a child?
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Well, he did tell me that he's single cause he's scared. But he never said why he was scared. I'm not sure if he was abused or anything. I know of ONE girlfriend but I'm not sure what happened with that. :perplexed I just know he starts things w/ women and "finds" an excuse to stop pursuing them, and the excuses are so lame. First i thought he was picky but that's not the case. He's very scared and insecure of something which lead me to think it may be the sex. :ohwell:
 
Trying to be celibate possibly?

Gay, but not ready to come out yet?

I don't see why a 31 year old man would be impotent unless he has serious health problems.
 
caltron said:
My first guess would be gay before impotent too.[/quote]

Are you serious??? I mean, I'm usually good at detecting gay men..he doesn't seem gay AT ALL to me. I mean, AT ALL. Of course it always can be a possibility. Now my curiousity is killing me. I'm not going to know the truth until he really trusts me. :sad:
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kia said:
caltron said:
My first guess would be gay before impotent too.[/quote]

Are you serious??? I mean, I'm usually good at detecting gay men..he doesn't seem gay AT ALL to me. I mean, AT ALL. Of course it always can be a possibility. Now my curiousity is killing me. I'm not going to know the truth until he really trusts me. :sad:
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I'm just trying to exhaust all other possibilities because it is very rare for a young man to be impotent. Even older men that are, are usually that way because of medications that they are taking.

Maybe he's just not interested in sex? Yes, those types do exist.
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MizAvalon said:
kia said:
I'm just trying to exhaust all other possibilities because it is very rare for a young man to be impotent. Even older men that are, are usually that way because of medications that they are taking.

Maybe he's just not interested in sex? Yes, those types do exist.
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Yeah, maybe that's the case..although I've never met one like that but doesn't mean they don't exist. :look:
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