"Why do so many blacks prefer straight hair?"

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preciouslove0x said:
Please don't shoot at me. Just curious. :blush:


Have you ever heard a YT woman say that they prefer kinky textured hair? I ask because I was talking to one of my YT best friends earlier today about the subject. She asked me why so many blacks prefer straight hair (we're extremely close so we talk about everything under the sun, in other words I took no offense). Is it because "they are able to achieve it" and if they couldn't, like YT people can't achieve kinky hair, "would they still prefer it?" What are your thoughts? I never thought about it before and don't have an opinion just yet. I do personally prefer straight hair (so obviously that's not why I went natural). But would we prefer it if we couldn't achieve it?

No bickering please (and if you don't like this post then please don't comment)
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I have not read any post on here but yours.

Many are programed from the womb to despise their natural hair. It started with the slave runners taking us from our respective countries and divorcing us from our lives, our land, our cultures, our religions and our practices.

Once brought to the USA and in Puerto Rico ( I can not speak for Brazil or the other Countries/Islands that had slaves sold to them) we were labeled as property and raped of everything that made us who we were in our respective countries. It started with the slaves masters.

Generations later that self hate is preached to us from our families.

We do not research on how to care for our beautiful hair and the hate of our hair is a continuous spiral.

I have a longer answer based on different geografical mindsets seeing as I grew up in San Diego, was stationed in San Antonio and live in North Carolina, but that would be too long.

P.S. Let's not for get the slave master induced rivalry between the "house ******" and the "field ******" that continues to this day in the form of "look at how lite she is. I hate her." "Look how dark he is he is ugly" (no matter how beautiful he actually is) "look at her hair she has good hair" "girl bestil *pops child on head* I need to streighten thes naps" "I ahte your nappy hair. why can't you have good hair like____________"
 
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Lenee925 said:
/devil'sadvocate

Not that your opinion needs defending, but I think I get what you are saying. Maybe if Kizzie had at least detangled, juiced and threw on a cute headband, she would have looked alright? In the movie it did look really matted. Stop me if I'm reaching here..
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LOL, come on now. She was a slave. I don't think she had the time or resources for all that. Just sayin'... :rolleyes:

I thought her hair was cute though. Didn't look matted to me.
 
I think she would have gotten a high 5 from LHCF!

kizzy.gif


Very cute! Especially in the first pic where she was the young Kizzy.
 
I think a lot of black women feel that having straight hair evens the playing field. Women of other races have straight hair, so we should too if we want to be desirable to the opposite sex.

So if you have 3 women of other races, white, asian, latino, then a black women with coils, who is the prince charming of ANY race going to eliminate first? Think "the bachelor" for a second...

This is a very dangerous thought pattern IMO. The only way to combat this is to be natural, wear it and wear it well, and see how well you do. In corporate america. On the dating/playing field. In life. Trust me, swagg runs much deeper than what's on my head, but that's me.

Other races don't desire our hair types because WE don't even want our hair type. So why should they?

If more black women embraced their natural beauty, oh man... we could straight take over the game. Let the rest of them spend $$$ billions trying to get something they could never have naturally. Let them suffer burns and breakage as they alter the molecular structure of their hair's protein bonds. They already bake in the sun...I'm just sayin'....
 
nikolite said:
LOL, come on now. She was a slave. I don't think she had the time or resources for all that. Just sayin'... :rolleyes:

I thought her hair was cute though. Didn't look matted to me.
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:lachen:Well at least I tried....My own grandmother told me yesterday that natural hair only looks nice with an "S-Curl perm". :rolleyes:
 
Lenee925 said:
I am so glad she was honest. Bint was saying that her opinion was probably very common among us black women. What annoys me is that it took this long to finally get to the point of the entire post. Folks getting called nazis and insecure all because we don't want to read between the lines. Even had 2520 folks in here sitting back taking it all in. SMDH
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People were being called insecure and nazis because they make it seem like everyone feels that way. Not everyone feels the way some feel. Not everyone thinks of natural hair as making you look like you are an extra in roots. That to me is taking it to a whole nother level.

I find it odd that people can asses someones personality, reasons behind their actions etc... because of their hair choice. I do feel that there are def women that do things for the wrong reasons. Some of those reasons are from conditinoing etc.... But not all. We are humans before we are black. We are individuals before we are a group of people. The generalizations and judgements about a whole group because of what some believe is what got to me.
 
My first post here! I wear my hair straight because I can, I like it and its easier to manage. I wore my hair in braids when I was a kid until I was 16 and I still do during the summer when I swim. But I prefer my hair straight because I feel its more me and because I can! Freedom is a wonderful thing!!
 
βεℓℓα said:
I think a lot of black women feel that having straight hair evens the playing field. Women of other races have straight hair, so we should too if we want to be desirable to the opposite sex.

So if you have 3 women of other races, white, asian, latino, then a black women with coils, who is the prince charming of ANY race going to eliminate first? Think "the bachelor" for a second...

This is a very dangerous thought pattern IMO. The only way to combat this is to be natural, wear it and wear it well, and see how well you do. In corporate america. On the dating/playing field. In life. Trust me, swagg runs much deeper than what's on my head, but that's me.

Other races don't desire our hair types because WE don't even want our hair type. So why should they?

If more black women embraced their natural beauty, oh man... we could straight take over the game. Let the rest of them spend $$$ billions trying to get something they could never have naturally. Let them suffer burns and breakage as they alter the molecular structure of their hair's protein bonds. They already bake in the sun...I'm just sayin'....
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Yes! :yep:
 
Lenee925 said:
/devil'sadvocate

Not that your opinion needs defending, but I think I get what you are saying. Maybe if Kizzie had at least detangled, juiced and threw on a cute headband, she would have looked alright? In the movie it did look really matted. Stop me if I'm reaching here..
Click to expand...

I think what you and the other individual posted is quite interesting. I'm going to stick strictly to hair being an ornament on top of one's head, nothing more or less for the purposes of this post. Realistically being born one way or having one feature doesn't mean you a. will be satisfied with that feature or b. you might really look good with that feature.

Someone mentioned how her friend started to gray early, that was something she was born with that she could have learned to accept and 'rock' but she chose to instead use hair dye. This choice lead her to more confidence and a feeling of personal beauty (I assume). Just because she chose to dye her hair rather than keep the gray doesn't mean the gray was the evil beast, maybe it just didn't look good on her.

Maybe sometimes something just doesn't fit, dress it up however you like and say it will ALWAYS work for an individual but it may just not work that way. For instance I've always loved Solange's hair, from the time she was rocking the long weaves to the very short cut to the large puff she has now. She always looked good. However when I recall Beyonce's curly pics I'm torn, something about it doesn't work. There are times she looked super cute and other times she looked forgettable. Nothing about her with curly hair impressed or interested me. Just like when she wore the dark brown hair I realized (surprisingly) it didn't look good on her. That might be the natural color that grows out of her head but it did nothing to enhance her appearance. On the flip the dark brown/black looks gorgeous on so many other black women.

Some people don't look good with long hair, short hair, brown hair, blond hair, curly hair, straight hair. Thus why we have a billion-dollar cosmetic industry making money off that reality.
 
OT: I never understood why people feel comfortable referring to some naturals as racist mass murderers (Nazis). Nah, that isn't divisive at all.
 
Bronxjazzy -

Totally OT but I have to say every time I see a post of yours and that beautiful baby girl I instantly smile. She is just gorgeous!

Congrats!
 
Bint Yusef said:
HC I see what you are saying and respect your POV. I just read that you are natural and it may be that you are struggling a bit to find your place and styles you feel that enhance your particular personality and look? I feel like you've boxed natural hair into sort of an earth mother box and you are right that particular style does not suit everyone, but natural hair is not limited to that. I also feel like the more women that go natural of varying backgrounds contributes to the increasingly growing dialogue and the face of natural hair may be more palatable to some women. I think if you look around you will see that there are quite a few people around here that don't do the boho look, self included. It just takes some trial and error and everyone is able to get to a point where they can pull off their own look :yep: It could just be a matter of getting more length if you feel that the shorter styles dont suit you.
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I appreciate that, and in essence that speaks for me personally and my hair struggles, length is more the issue. Im not a big fan of short styles period be it natural or relaxed...But, before I rule anything out I will atleast try it and see how it works for me. If anyone can recall, my last profile pics was me with my short hair do. It was cute (as I feel most styles on me are) but I just didnt feel it suited me. Which I think anyone should be allowed to do without being micro analyzed to the point of questioning their motives.
Im sure the negatives mentioned in this thread about why some Black women relax is true, but the doesnt apply to all.
 
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nikolite said:
That's exactly what this thread is about!

But IMO, if a black woman has hair that grows straight or kinky out of her head, its a good look for her.

ETA: I wasn't putting those words in your mouth or even referencing you. I was saying that no one on this thread or IRL has said that to date that I've ever heard.
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I appreciate the clarification, but when a comment is made that piggy-backs off what I said, and closely correlates I can on assume that one was trying to put words in my mouth or insinuate that my comment also meant something else.
 
IMO...

This isn't a natural vs. relaxed issue. This is a "WTF is wrong with black women and our self-image" issue as we relate to the world. As we have been taught to see [and hate] ourselves.

Straight hair is a preference. I think we all get that. But to say that I-you-we-she can't wear a natural style because it doesn't look good, isn't flattering, and/or is slave-like absolutely floors me.
 
dynamic1 said:
OT: I never understood why people feel comfortable referring to some naturals as racist mass murderers (Nazis). Nah, that isn't divisive at all.
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I hate the term,nappy Nazi, but I get why some use it. It is because some naturals try to force feed their view on others and it leads to bad consequences. People have been hurt by their words or actions. It basically is a superiority complex. It seems there is a theme going on in this thread where relaxed or strait = inferior/ brain washed and natural hair is elevated. It leads to division to elevate one above another. That is my opinion of the term.:ohwell: I don't view natural hair as bad. It is just another way for me to wear my hair if I choose to do so as well as relaxed hair.
 
I don't give a damn about what anyone thinks of my preferring straight hair. My hair is personal business. Stay out of my personal business.
 
DDTexlaxed said:
I hate the term,nappy Nazi, but I get why some use it. It is because some naturals try to force feed their view on others and it leads to bad consequences. People have been hurt by their words or actions. It basically is a superiority complex. It seems there is a theme going on in this thread where relaxed or strait = inferior/ brain washed and natural hair is elevated. It leads to division to elevate one above another. That is my opinion of the term.:ohwell: I don't view natural hair as bad. It is just another way for me to wear my hair if I choose to do so as well as relaxed hair.
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I understand this ... but on the flip side, there is no name for women with relaxers who push who "needs" a relaxer. That's also a superiority complex. The term is ... harsh, to say the least. How about natural optimists? :look:
 
βεℓℓα said:
IMO...

This isn't a natural vs. relaxed issue. This is a "WTF is wrong with black women and our self-image" issue as we relate to the world. As we have been taught to see [and hate] ourselves.

Straight hair is a preference. I think we all get that. But to say that I-you-we-she can't wear a natural style because it doesn't look good, isn't flattering, and/or is slave-like absolutely floors me.
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Who said that?
 
honeycomb719 said:
Lol, but honestly from MPOV not every AA can pull this look off without looking like an xtra from the cast of Roots. ***Dont Stone me yall***

ETA: Or maybe I shouldve used Good Times as a more modern example!
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What is wrong with looking like/reflecting the beauty of our ancestors? We descend from them after all........why should we scoff at the notion of looking like them? Thats like being ashamed of looking like your mother.
 
BEAUTYU2U said:
I understand this ... but on the flip side, there is no name for women with relaxers who push who "needs" a relaxer. That's also a superiority complex. The term is ... harsh, to say the least. How about natural optimists? :look:
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But we don't see relaxed ladies pushing relaxers on this site. This site is about welcoming the beauty of both relaxed and natural hair, not the elevated divisive good & bad hair mentality.:ohwell: This site is supposed to an oasis from that.:rolleyes: This is supposed to be celebrating and helping others to achieve long hair, both relaxed and natural. I wish we would get back to discussing that instead of things that can divide us.:yep:
 
Honestly, I think its the same reason so many white women prefer light or blonde hair.....

Its the generalized societal image of beauty. Its a little different for everyone but the generalized reason is the same.
 
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