What Happened To Your College Sweetheart?

Lurkee

Lurkee

Well-Known Member
Hey ladies,

I normally lurk in this section of the board but I have something on my mind. I am graduating grad school this summer (July) and I have been in a relationship since first year of Uni (2007). So I am a bit worried of what will happen. We are both looking for jobs and it is likely my boyfriend will be working in a different country. I am preparing myself mentally for a break up or a long LDR.

I am just curious, did it work out with your college sweetheart. Did you even have one? Stories please. :)
 
We'll be married 25 years this summer:). Our plans were to be together no matter what. We were engaged by my senior year though. He was older and graduated before me. By the time I graduated we couldn't wait to get married and be together. We were in different cities up until the wedding but he found a job in my city (our hometown) and moved back a few weeks before the wedding. If he hadn't I would have moved to where he was.
 
Yes I did and he was my first love. We were together for almost six years. I thought we were going to marry oneday but that of course did not happen. I graduated but he is still trying to finish and I am in grad school. Once I started grad school and was in a new setting we naturally grew apart. Well I wanted out and he wanted to stay. I grew tired of holding up the relationship. He was a great guy but we needed to go our separate ways. Looking back he was the best fit.
 
Up until a few years ago, he was a teacher like me. Then he lost his mind. Long story, but I would hate to be in his shoes right now. He burned a lot of bridges and he burned mine the worst of all.
 
It's funny that this thread came about bc I sent him a message on fb just to see how he was doing. He is in a relationship now with a younger girl.
 
deltadreamland said:
Up until a few years ago, he was a teacher like me. Then he lost his mind. Long story, but I would hate to be in his shoes right now. He burned a lot of bridges and he burned mine the worst of all.
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Wow. Makes me think about somebody else when I heard burning bridges. People have to be careful when treating those that cared about you like ****. It catches up with you eventually.
 
hopeful said:
We'll be married 25 years this summer:). Our plans were to be together no matter what. We were engaged by my senior year though. He was older and graduated before me. By the time I graduated we couldn't wait to get married and be together. We were in different cities up until the wedding but he found a job in my city (our hometown) and moved back a few weeks before the wedding. If he hadn't I would have moved to where he was.
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This is very inspiring. I think your determination to make it work is the crucial thing. He is determined but I am like :perplexed
 
tinkat said:
It's funny that this thread came about bc I sent him a message on fb just to see how he was doing. He is in a relationship now with a younger girl.
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Do you miss him? Do you wish you had stayed together? I love my boyfriend but we have differences in race and religion and I am thinking graduation might be a good time to start over but I don't want to let go of a loving relationship. He is my best friend.
 
He is dating some other girl... I'm single,working, in school, getting another masters, and completely in love with him (secretly hoping things don't work out with him & his boo). We've been out of undergrad for 6 years now. Through those years we have been on & off, and have both dated other people. Every time he has wanted me, I've been with some one else. Now,the table has turned and this sucks! I'm waiting to see what God has in store for us. I didn't realize how much I loved him until I didn't have him....
 
Lurkee said:
Do you miss him? Do you wish you had stayed together? I love my boyfriend but we have differences in race and religion and I am thinking graduation might be a good time to start over but I don't want to let go of a loving relationship. He is my best friend.
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Sometimes I do, he was my first everything literally. But wish we stayed together...no. Because my journey to now would have been different. I'm a very different person and idk how different I would have been. I let go when it was time to. Looking back I appreciate how he treated me and when I meet guys remember the bar he set. He was not perfect but he treated me the best which is why he was he only one I was truly in a relationship with. He was a good guy but his problem to me was that he always thought I would be around, he took me for granted. When we were long distance he treated me like a queen in his presence but was never a phone person. It felt like I was in a relationship by myself. Its light weight compares to what others have done, but for the situation i was tired. Plus he had become too comfortable. He was still in my college town and I am moving on in a new city starting a new degree. He told me after we broke up that he thought he had me and if we broke up than I would take it harder. Tables definitely were turned.

I don't know what it is about me and guys but I make them feels so secure, to the point where they get cocky as hell. Then when I pull the rug from beneath them they are shocked. I go from warm to ice cold.
 
swtpea said:
He is dating some other girl... I'm single,working, in school, getting another masters, and completely in love with him (secretly hoping things don't work out with him & his boo). We've been out of undergrad for 6 years now. Through those years we have been on & off, and have both dated other people. Every time he has wanted me, I've been with some one else. Now,the table has turned and this sucks! I'm waiting to see what God has in store for us. I didn't realize how much I loved him until I didn't have him....
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Awwwww...,
 
tinkat

Thanks for the honesty. We had a break for a year when he decided to study abroad. I wanted to test the waters. It took me that year to realise that I did not want anyone else. He treats me really well and I am genuinely happy but sometimes I am worried about our differences. I don't want to let go of the best thing that happened to me but I don't want to hang on to a relationship with potential future problems either. :(
 
swtpea said:
He is dating some other girl... I'm single,working, in school, getting another masters, and completely in love with him (secretly hoping things don't work out with him & his boo). We've been out of undergrad for 6 years now. Through those years we have been on & off, and have both dated other people. Every time he has wanted me, I've been with some one else. Now,the table has turned and this sucks! I'm waiting to see what God has in store for us. I didn't realize how much I loved him until I didn't have him....
Click to expand...

Aww. I hope you both find happiness too. :yep:
 
Lurkee you are welcome! It's good that you took a break. That is something I wished we would have done when we had rough patches. We probably would be together now honestly but then again I don't think so. If everything is good then don't worry about the distance. Distance was never the real problem with a strong foundation and communication. If your differences are too much compromise on then you may have to think long and hard.

If my college sweetheart wanted to rekindle I would consider it but I know I would tread lightly. I would definitely have to be his friend again bc I am not the same and he isn't either. He seem like he is into the church heavy while I am more spiritual versus religious.
 
Aww ladies, thanks for the support. I'm just going to let go & let God. I know it's cliche, but I honestly feel that if he is happy, then that is all I can ask for at this time. If it is meant to be then I guess it will. I had to learn the lesson the hard way, but I now know what really matters in life and in love. I have a list and it only consists of two things: someone with a good heart & someone with a good mind. Unfortunately, I was very shallow in the past & I was looking for a lot of other things that didn't matter. Please learn from my mistakes.
 
swtpea
I feel that is why we are all here on earth. To learn the meaning of unconditional love (self love) and to learn how to let go. I have reached a level of acceptance and it's refreshing. Alot of people have that story of the one that got away, even my mama.

Then everyone afterwards have a piece of this and a piece of that, but not the right fit.

I'm good either way.

Wanted to add I have a simple list too and promise not to stray away from the simple thing that matter the most to me.
 
Nope, didn't workout. He has a long time (15+ years) live in love with children. We are cordial when we see each other. I dodged a bullet since playing house is not for me, but who knows it may be the her choice and not his.
 
I had a high school sweetheart. he was in the special ed class (the one that meets once every other day). Back in highschool I didn't notice and I was always confused that he was in the class b/c he was so intelligent. Now? :rofl:
 
Never had a college sweetheart. I had a hood sweetheart...My whole time in college I was already in a relationship with someone I grew up with.
 
He still calls me trying to get that old thing back. smh.

He knows I have a SO and claims he isnt trying to start trouble but acts like a big baby because Im not paying him the attention he wants and not showing him much interest. I cant believe how sensitive he's gotten over the years.
 
"Sweetheart" now has three kids by two different women, still in our college town, not married to new chick, planning the revolution...told mutual friends that I changed too much...smh. Wow. I threw away that lotto ticket.
 
*** THAT WIGGA!!! He never did graduate from our college. He left to serve our country...twice. So proud of him for that. He came back to finish he degree but started working two jobs and kept his position in the military. He's still with the girl he cheated on me with. She's a member here. I think she used to read my old blogs *shrugs*. He's still fine as hell and we converse from time to time...but I value my feelings, heart, and time a lot more than I did when we were together soooo It's a wrap no looking back.
 
was the star bball player at our school...now hes a doctor at a prominent hospital in nyc...has a son...not married
 
We will celebrate 23 years of marriage in June 2012, have 2 sons in college and a Yorkie still at home - LOL, and LOVE being pseudo empty-nesters.
 
I saw him a few months ago :nono: I shouldn't have. He tricked me again into thinking it was coincidence meet-up. I trust him too much.:lol: But he's married, kids and rolling in dough. He's really helped me out after my break-up with no strings.
 
I didn't actually have a college sweetheart but there was a guy that I was totally.infatuated with all 4 years. He tried to ask me out twice but my self esteem was really too low to accept that I could be with him at that time. I really regret it everyday, every month, and ever year that I continue to remain single. I haven't really been to attracted to another man as strongly since we graduated 5 years ago. He London getting business degree at Oxford and I here being a loser in almost every faucet of my life I can't even motivate myself to apply for med school or get out thus rut I've been in since graduating. I just passing time in a unfulfilling 9-5 though it pays well and great benefits. I feel a lot of regret about my life and I'm only 27.
 
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