When I used "you"/"your" in my post, I didn't mean you personally (I didn't even think you are natural b/c comments like yours usually come from relaxed/texturized women). I meant it in the generic sense, which is actually poor grammar anyway. I should have used "one."
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Was our hair meant to be this difficult?
- Thread starter kally
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Crissi
New Member
I look at it this way, our hair may require more care and pampering to stay healthy (as opposed to their anything goes hair) but our skin is naturally tanned- other folks have to spray it on, our lips are luscious- other folks have to inject and plump, and our backsides are bootylicious- no plastic surgery needed!
Shoot, 3 out of 4 ain't bad at all!
AMEN! Oh and ur puppy is adorable!
AvaSpeaks
New Member
I am natural!!! I am natural!!!
Alot of things I say from personal exprience; breakage, growth retention, natural hair styles, etc.
I am natural!!! And I'm sensitive
I guess I'm gonna have to load a pic
AvaSpeaks
New Member
And I agree with you.
However, I also agree with myself that natural hair can be harder to manage, if you don't know what your doing.
And it can be harder to manage if you do. Same with relaxed hair.
I know what I am saying in my head but it's not coming out right
Ok, no need to load a pic. I believe you that you are natural--I just wasn't aware of that fact when I posted the response in which I used the "you"/"your" throughout. Anyway, it seems you are having difficulty with your hair, which is totally natural (ha! no pun intended). How long have you been natural? It does get easier if you believe that your hair can be long and easy to manage, and keep working towards that goal by building a regimen that works for you.I am natural!!! I am natural!!!
Alot of things I say from personal exprience; breakage, growth retention, natural hair styles, etc.
I am natural!!! And I'm sensitive
I guess I'm gonna have to load a pic
cocoberry10
Well-Known Member
At the end of the day, I guess we've just got to learn how to work with what God gave us.
At the end of the day, I guess we've just got to learn how to work with what God gave us.
I think that's a good moral to this thread.My opinion is this-
Our hair is the way it is because God created it that way, its beautiful and versatile.
I think the problem with our hair is due to fact that we do a lot of stuff our hair to alter its natural state.
I am african and have to say I do not believe the theory about africans not growing hair, when I was living in africa have seen different hair lengths.
Also for those that quote I corinthians- about women growing hair long this need to be translated in context.
If you are a bible scholar (although am not), you would know that paul wrote this letter at the time that the pegans (sp), men were growing their hair and the women were shaving the hair, they were practising some immoral acts (according to the bible) like having sex in the temple, individuals of same sex having intercouse, men wearing women'sclothing etc.
so paul was telling the followers of christ not be like them, i.e men should wear hair short,and women wear hair long.
Also I have to also add that concept of long hair may vary from women to women and also what their husband likes (biblical times)
So for a 4a-4b long hair is a big hair, for 1a is flowy, this is what makes each person unique, we cant all be the same it will be to boring, if only we accept ourself and forget about what society thinks we should be.
To add more- theory of evolution is nonsense. Dawin, started this theory at the time, he was not achieving much in life, he was also drawing away from God and started questioning God's existence.
The theory was also at the height of the white suprimacy theory,hence the reason why he suggested that everyone was black before and white evolved from black, to make it seems like been white was superior and of an advantage.
No one can say for sure whether we are all from africa. In fact a recent discovery channel discovered some homo sapiens that are thought to be red hair and have long nose.
Another thing that makes Dawins theory of evolution flawed, it describes the fact natural selection involves development of intermediate species and till date no fossils of an intermediate specie has been found.
We should all look at ourselves as a spectrum, God created each one differently from blond 1a to dark 4b etc, and all different with their own uniqueness.
Our hair is the way it is because God created it that way, its beautiful and versatile.
I think the problem with our hair is due to fact that we do a lot of stuff our hair to alter its natural state.
I am african and have to say I do not believe the theory about africans not growing hair, when I was living in africa have seen different hair lengths.
Also for those that quote I corinthians- about women growing hair long this need to be translated in context.
If you are a bible scholar (although am not), you would know that paul wrote this letter at the time that the pegans (sp), men were growing their hair and the women were shaving the hair, they were practising some immoral acts (according to the bible) like having sex in the temple, individuals of same sex having intercouse, men wearing women'sclothing etc.
so paul was telling the followers of christ not be like them, i.e men should wear hair short,and women wear hair long.
Also I have to also add that concept of long hair may vary from women to women and also what their husband likes (biblical times)
So for a 4a-4b long hair is a big hair, for 1a is flowy, this is what makes each person unique, we cant all be the same it will be to boring, if only we accept ourself and forget about what society thinks we should be.
To add more- theory of evolution is nonsense. Dawin, started this theory at the time, he was not achieving much in life, he was also drawing away from God and started questioning God's existence.
The theory was also at the height of the white suprimacy theory,hence the reason why he suggested that everyone was black before and white evolved from black, to make it seems like been white was superior and of an advantage.
No one can say for sure whether we are all from africa. In fact a recent discovery channel discovered some homo sapiens that are thought to be red hair and have long nose.
Another thing that makes Dawins theory of evolution flawed, it describes the fact natural selection involves development of intermediate species and till date no fossils of an intermediate specie has been found.
We should all look at ourselves as a spectrum, God created each one differently from blond 1a to dark 4b etc, and all different with their own uniqueness.
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charmtreese
Well-Known Member
At the end of the day, I guess we've just got to learn how to work with what God gave us.
Exactly!!! And if that doesn't work get a relaxer!!!
tocktick
Well-Known Member
our hair on its own did not inspire the hatred some black people have for it. it was the slave master (and whites during the slavery era) who initially taught blacks that their characteristics - nose, lips, skin and hair - were ugly and inferior to white ones. now a lot of black people have had their brainwashed ancestors pass down the message that black hair is ugly (as well as everything else). this is how you get generations of black women trying to get straight hair, even black men conking their hair. lets not forget that socialisation in western society has meant many of us have come to aspire to the beauty ideal that is prominent here (white skin, long hair, fair eyes & hair etc). i strongly doubt pre-slavery black people were cursing out their hair and lamenting why god "cursed" them for their nappy hair. i'm not saying that every black woman who straightens their hair is self-hating but imo, some of us didn't start thinking of out hair as "difficult" until we were socialised to believe it was.
bravenewgirl87
New Member
I think our hair only seems unmanageable because we are now having to take control of it. Imagine what a good hair stylist goes through each hair visit. My family members have been using castor oil and coconut oil for years, eating proper food, drinking water, etc., long before LHCF. A lot of the thing we do now are just time-honoured traditions in other parts of the world or to other cultures. When I take care of my body from the inside while simultaneously taking care of my hair, the process just becomes easier. After a while, it won't seem like such a heavy load.
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I have not read through all of the posts yet, but I have had the EXACT same thoughts as the original post. I know that our hair is beautiful and that God doesn't make mistakes, and we have to treat it well and all of that....BUT I still ponder over the differences between our hair and other races and why that difference exists. I have heard about the rationale of being protected from the heat, but I think about the extremely hot temperatures in the Middle East and wonder why the same logic didn't apply to them. This is a question I have wanted to do some research on. Is it a generational curse that can be reversed, or is it a blessing of versatility and (historical) protection from the elements?
I like my hair, sometimes its frustrating (esp. since the BC), but MANY women and men of every race are frustrated by and have insecurities about their hair as well.
GREAT THREAD!!
I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking about this.
I like my hair, sometimes its frustrating (esp. since the BC), but MANY women and men of every race are frustrated by and have insecurities about their hair as well.
GREAT THREAD!!
I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking about this.
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nappity
Member
Quiet as its kept - other races wish they had our attributes.And what generational curse??? Are you talking about Cain ? cause if you are- he and his died during the flood. Are you talking about Noah- cant be he was a drunk and God still used him. Or maybe Ibrahim- the man who tried to pass his wife off as his sister?? Curse? Reject that thought immediately!I dont know everything about God and the Bible- but thinking that our hair is the way it is because of some "curse" is the way the slaveholder was able to subjugate the minds of enslaved Africans. I know this isn't a reading thread but I'm gonna suggest to all of you a book called " The Peculiar Institution"
I call the African contributions to society in the past and present as a blessing of versatility and forgiveness. Jesus/Yshua was a black man with this difficult hair "like that of sheep's wool.
(Apologies to all those hit by shrapnel during my implosion)
I say generational curse in response to the original poster's statement:
I firmly believe that God did not design our hair to be so fragile. I believe that someone way back in the day messed it up for us. I never heard of other races having to tie up their hair in silk or satin to prevent it from spliting or having to add oil etc... I know they have issues to but not as fragile as ours.
Some people believe that individuals can "inherit" misfortune, and a tendency to specific types of weaknesses from their ancestors (as a result of a sin comitted by the ancestor) by what is referred to as a generational curse. Under this theory some people are "predestined" to be prone to have certain weaknesses or repeat the mistakes of their parents, grandparents, etc. unless the curse is broken. I could go on with examples of this, but that's for another topic on another forum.
I'm not saying that our hair is the result of a generational curse, I'm just saying that in pondering the difference the thought expressed by the original poster (in bold above) has crossed my mind, as well.
I know that might not be a pro-black statement and point a finger towards self-hatred, and everything else that has been stated. *Ducking from the oncoming rebukes!* I'm just saying what has crossed my mind. I LOVE being AA and I wouldn't want to be any other race, have never desired to... but I do wish I could wash and go and grow without all the extra steps.
I firmly believe that God did not design our hair to be so fragile. I believe that someone way back in the day messed it up for us. I never heard of other races having to tie up their hair in silk or satin to prevent it from spliting or having to add oil etc... I know they have issues to but not as fragile as ours.
Some people believe that individuals can "inherit" misfortune, and a tendency to specific types of weaknesses from their ancestors (as a result of a sin comitted by the ancestor) by what is referred to as a generational curse. Under this theory some people are "predestined" to be prone to have certain weaknesses or repeat the mistakes of their parents, grandparents, etc. unless the curse is broken. I could go on with examples of this, but that's for another topic on another forum.
I'm not saying that our hair is the result of a generational curse, I'm just saying that in pondering the difference the thought expressed by the original poster (in bold above) has crossed my mind, as well.
I know that might not be a pro-black statement and point a finger towards self-hatred, and everything else that has been stated. *Ducking from the oncoming rebukes!* I'm just saying what has crossed my mind. I LOVE being AA and I wouldn't want to be any other race, have never desired to... but I do wish I could wash and go and grow without all the extra steps.
nappity
Member
My sincerest apologies- 2u jdub
Maybe the original poster is no longer on the board. IDK
Her opine or vent was one-sided. In spite of its frailty its still the most versatile of all hair types.I'm glad that we have raised ourselves up to the collective consciousness that Europeans' standards of beauty are warped.
IMO, every race has to take extra steps for something- we have a natural SPF of 30. Who else can claim that? I hope no one bashes you for going through what we all have had to struggle. But it is in the struggle that we find out who we really are. and accept it. and love it.
AvaSpeaks
New Member
Here, here! Like I know that vitamins are important to health and having healthy hair. But seriously, other races, especially the women, are not popping anywhere between 3-9 different pills everyday or every other day. Our diet, meaning AA, is not that undernourished :fat:
AvaSpeaks
New Member
I've been natural for years. 10 years I think.
I just want my hair to grow longer than it is. That's all. It's the same length natural or relaxed. It doesn't matter. I just want it to grow. I know what I have to do and I am doing it as well.
nappity
Member
why do you think that our race is the one popping 3-9 pills a day? How do you know what other races do behind closed doors? Im vegetarian- I get all my nutritional needs met through my food. No supplements nothing and that goes for MANY people of color. Vitamins/Minerals are supplemental- taken only if you possess a deficiency . I dont think its the African American Community that keeps GNC and Vitamin Shoppe and Geritol blue chip stock market companies. I believe we do support McDonalds very heavily. Anyway- whats your point? Are you on the board as a provocateur? Are you a cyber-bully? Or are your statements sincere and you are trying to work this out?
My point is that with the proper products and the right tools and the right technique you CAN retain growth in spite of the frailty. So there is no inherent difficulty! Whats difficult is being 10% of a mass population that subliminally sends messages that we are not okay as we are.
dinaaike
New Member
This is a REALLY good, thought-provoking thread.
JDub and AvaSpeaks, your thoughts and frustrations are reasonable and valid. I, for one, think the differences and difficulties you speak of actually exist. What may be getting missed is the fact that these differences are few drops in an ocean of versatility.
It is easy to complain about extra effort to care for kinky hair, but there are many traits that we were never permitted to choose: height, gene pool, eye color, bone structure, etc. To say that others have an easier time with hair is to ignore that they have a more difficult time with so many other things that you have easier. They may lament having to use self-tanners and risk skin cancer to achieve your toasty hue. It is just one of the many weights that create the balance we live with.
IMO, God gives us things we do not always appreciate to instill in us the ability to accept that which we cannot change. People have always wanted--and will always want--to alter something about themselves, but the proof is in the code. Your genetic code--your DNA--will always reveal who you really are, whether you accept it or not. So you can make peace with what God offers and see how easy things are when you let him handle "his business", or you can meddle with it and frustrate yourself
. When we're ready to be thankful, I believe, he'll be there to show us how good things can really be.
Excellent responses on this thread. It's great to see so many different angles. Nappity4b! <wags finger> somehow I knew I liked you.
Cheleigh
Well-Known Member
This is a REALLY good, thought-provoking thread.
JDub and AvaSpeaks, your thoughts and frustrations are reasonable and valid. I, for one, think the differences and difficulties you speak of actually exist. What may be getting missed is the fact that these differences are few drops in an ocean of versatility.
It is easy to complain about extra effort to care for kinky hair, but there are many traits that we were never permitted to choose: height, gene pool, eye color, bone structure, etc. To say that others have an easier time with hair is to ignore that they have a more difficult time with so many other things that you have easier. They may lament having to use self-tanners and risk skin cancer to achieve your toasty hue. It is just one of the many weights that create the balance we live with.
IMO, God gives us things we do not always appreciate to instill in us the ability to accept that which we cannot change. People have always wanted--and will always want--to alter something about themselves, but the proof is in the code. Your genetic code--your DNA--will always reveal who you really are, whether you accept it or not. So you can make peace with what God offers and see how easy things are when you let him handle "his business", or you can meddle with it and frustrate yourself
When we're ready to be thankful, I believe, he'll be there to show us how good things can really be.
Excellent responses on this thread. It's great to see so many different angles. Nappity4b! <wags finger> somehow I knew I liked you.
BEAUTIFUL post DinaaikeSleepyJean
Well-Known Member
Shrinkage my dear, shrinkage....just look up miss cocoface (she's bsl w/hair that draws up to a 2-3 inch twa). In many of my photos particularly wash n gos and rollersets my hair looks like it may be 1 or 2 inches past my shoulders, max, when in actuality its about 1-2 from bsl (and I wear my bra quite low).
To shorthairforever:
Did you truly know how to care for your hair in its natural state and determined what worked for it? Because I often find that when many people first transition to natural hair, they STILL continue to use methods that worked on their straight hair-i.e using combs, styling products, or they utilize styles that do not help them become acquainted with working with their hair. It has taken me this whole 2.5 year journey to find styles & products that truly work with my texture (surprisingly rollersets, natural products, braids, wash n gos, and wigs) and even then my hair has almost grown to the same length it was when I was relaxed in much less time
Yes. I only wore my hair in braids. I took them down weekly and biweekly.
cocoberry10
Well-Known Member
I just wanted to add “If you love it, it will grow” and “if you love it, it will love you back”
Afrikaisi
New Member
I have learned this recently. I may seem crazy to my husband, but I actually talk to my hair, I try to replace my bad thoughts about my hair when it doesn't want to cooperate with me. Hence, my hair has a mind of its own, and I need to start listening to it. I need to start eating the right foods and drinking enough water. Our hair really does communicate with us.! Like I said, I know it sounds crazy, btw - my hair doesn't literally talk back.
Southernbella.
Well-Known Member
FineChyna
Member
i totally agree
but depending on what days you catch me i won't agree with this:
secondly is "our hair" really because of climate? because how do you explain people from India, south america and so forth not having our hair texture?
i'm not 100% sure i ever agreed with that.
i know a few church going people have told me our hair is either a curse or to make us stand out from other people for a reason. i can't remember what bible chapters/verses so excuse my vagueness.
Southernbella.
Well-Known Member
That's not directed at you...rather at the unenlightened people who told you that our hair might be a curse.
FineChyna
Member
That's not directed at you...rather at the unenlightened people who told you that our hair might be a curse.
the only other time i heard the curse story was from a white supremacist so i never took it personal. i just remember thinking "that stinks that we all gotta have nappy hair cause some other folks messed up" but that was waaay before i ever heard of natural hair.
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