Update: I'm getting a divorce..

[GodsPromises]

Hello everyone,

I have been getting email asking how I am doing and everything so I decided to do a update post.

Here is the orginal post:
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=145997

Well after going back and forth and back and forth my husband has decided that he doesn't want to lose me and wants to do whatever it takes to make things work. He has been going to counseling at the VA and he was diagonsed as having PTS ( Post Tramura Symdomn), and that is the cause of a lot of his anger. He served in the Vietamn War. So he is taking medication and seeing a counseler. He says that he realizes where he went wrong and we do anything that he can to make it right.

Before we never did anything together. Now he is making an effort to go walking with me, to be more relaxed and not fess about every little thing whic he now realizes is stupid to get upset about everything.

After much decision, I told him that I just don't have the faith that after 6 months or so that things would not go back to the way they were. I let him know that he can't be throwing my marriage up at me every time that he get mad at something. He stated that he understood that and that is why he is seeking help because he realize that he has a problem. After pray and a lot of thinking, I finally told him that I will give this a chance whlie waiting for an apartment. I'm still not 100% about everything but I will say that things has been pretty good lately.

 

[MzLady78]

Well, I think it's great that he realizes his faults and wants to work on them. Some folks don't make it that far.

He's fighting for you and that's wonderful. I really hope you guys can work it out.

 

[dlewis]

I think it's WONDERFUL of you to stay with him and help him through this. It's good that he realizes his love for you and wants this marriage to work.

I use to one of those people that threw "divorce" in my husband's face every time I didn't get my way. I'm so glad that Gd delivered me from that. I was a miserable person and I'm thankful that Gd opened DH heart to see me for what I would be one day. Marriage can be a wonderful wonderful union.

 

[klb120475]

I think it's WONDERFUL of you to stay with him and help him through this. It's good that he realizes his love for you and wants this marriage to work.

I use to one of those people that threw "divorce" in my husband's face every time I didn't get my way. I'm so glad that Gd delivered me from that. I was a miserable person and I'm thankful that Gd opened DH heart to see me for what I would be one day. Marriage can be a wonderful wonderful union.

 

[donna894]

Well Praise the Lord! Whatever you decide special praises to your hubby. It takes a big man to humble himself, admit his mistakes and seek help. Special praises to you dear lady. It is obvious that you are not holding on to anger and while you are protecting your heart, you can see that he is genuinely putting forth effort to be a better husband and a better man. You stood your ground and clearly it was for the better.

 

[sunnydaze]

That's good news! I believe most (not all, but most) marriages can be saved if both are willing to commit to working on it. Looks like he is taking his first steps.

 

[blazingthru]

I think that is wonderful that you have a forgiven heart and you are giving him another chance, I know its not easy but God will bless you. I really hope things work out for both of you and that you understand its a growing process he might slip up a little and you can gently remind him where he is. I wish you and your husband and son well.

 

[reallynow]

That's good news! I believe most (not all, but most) marriages can be saved if both are willing to commit to working on it. Looks like he is taking his first steps.

Exactly! I'm very happy for you LadyR.

 

[BillsBackerz67]

This deserves the banana dance! Im happy that he is willing to fight to save the marriage Good Luck!

 

[GodsPromises]

Thanks ladies,

Everyday is a different day and some days I want to just say no I'm not trying but like I told him I will work on it while I am there and we will have to see about the rest.

He was/is acting so nice and sweet my son said that he couldn't take it anymore and he had to do something to make Dad go back to the way he was

 

[Country gal]

I listened to a pastor this weekend about taking marraige to a hole nother level. He was a white pastor on TV. He was saying we need to take the three aspects of our love to a hole nother level. The loves were friendship love, passionate love and I forgot the other one.

He had a former miss america talk about her parents relationship problems. She said her mother said she wished she had never divorced her father. He can go with someone else but he will have the same results unless he is willing to change.

 

[PaperClip]

Can this thread title be changed to "We're working it out" or something like that? I like the positive side of that title!

Congrats, LadyR....

 

[donna894]

I listened to a pastor this weekend about taking marraige to a hole nother level. He was a white pastor on TV. He was saying we need to take the three aspects of our love to a hole nother level. The loves were friendship love, passionate love and I forgot the other one.

He had a former miss america talk about her parents relationship problems. She said her mother said she wished she had never divorced her father. He can go with someone else but he will have the same results unless he is willing to change.

Aint that the truth! There's a saying "wherever you go, there you are." That is, we can't run from our problems - we take them with us.

 

[Glib Gurl]

Wow, LadyR . . . I didn't realize that you were going through all of that. (I missed the original post.) Thank you so much for sharing and I'm glad for you that your husband is getting help and that your relationship with him is maturing.

(((hugs)))

 

[bluefolli]

I remember your thread...didn't know what to say because I felt so bad for you, so I didn't post. But I am very happy for your change in circumstances. Marriage is such hard work, so I'm glad your hubby is taking up his part. Good Luck Sista. I love seeing couples work things out.

 

[KnottyGurl]

Hi LadyR.

I saw your original post too. I'm glad that the two of you decided to work on it and I pray that everything continues to go well with you and your family.

at son about DH and all that "love and kindness" overdose.

 

[ChasingBliss]

Wow, I'm so sorry you were going through this. I pray that things will continue to get better.

 

[Caramela]

That is wonderful!!!