Relaxed Hair Thread

@MzSwift thanks so much! I'm in a hard place because I want relaxed hair like right now but I have a lot to learn. I guess its better to take my time absorbing all the info I need so I don't completely screw my hair (and scalp - yikes) up. I have this nice event on the 6th of December that I wanted it done by (I'm soooo tired of cringing at the thought of frequenting an event because of my hair). But I'm playing myself if I think I can do it in that much time. LOL.

Any ideas on good no-lye relaxers? I heard that no-lye is worse for hair because of calcium on the hair or something like that. Is that true and is there any way to deal with this side effect? Thanks again.
 
@FadingDelilah

I'm sure whatever you decide to do you'll look fabulous for your event!

There are lots of lovely no-lye heads of hair in this thread. I don't remember them all by name but I've heard lots of references here and on YT to ORS, African Pride and Just for Me relaxers. In my days before the hair boards I used to alternate lye and no-lye. I preferred Optimum.

I believe the no-lye ladies talk about chelating and other techniques to help with the calcium deposits. So sorry, I use lye so I'm not too versed on it. But I do think that overall, if you establish a consistent regi, your hair will flourish whether you choose lye or no-lye.
 
To all who celebrate it:

tenor.gif
 
MzSwift said:
@FadingDelilah

I'm sure whatever you decide to do you'll look fabulous for your event!

There are lots of lovely no-lye heads of hair in this thread. I don't remember them all by name but I've heard lots of references here and on YT to ORS, African Pride and Just for Me relaxers. In my days before the hair boards I used to alternate lye and no-lye. I preferred Optimum.

I believe the no-lye ladies talk about chelating and other techniques to help with the calcium deposits. So sorry, I use lye so I'm not too versed on it. But I do think that overall, if you establish a consistent regi, your hair will flourish whether you choose lye or no-lye.
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Okay, thanks for the encouragement and advice!!! I really appreciate it. :D
 
Note to self: Do NOT use flat ironed hair as a braid base!

I decided to take the risk of doing a cornrow base for my crochet twists. Since my hair was flat ironed, I figured it would limit the tangles I usually get. However, BECAUSE it was flat ironed and my strands are fine, my cornrows started slipping/loosening. So I just pulled the twists out. My son has a band concert tomorrow. I'll wear my hair out for that and then plait it up for a Lazy Girl crochet twist install. I'll rock that for 2 weeks until my family arrives and then wear my hair out for that week. I hope I can do it. I hate having my hair loose. LOL
 
I just do not have the density to pull off an exaggerated side part. It looks lacking on me both texlaxed and natural. I'm done trying. I think I look better with a slightly off centered "natural" part or a diagonal part.
 
MzSwift said:
I just do not have the density to pull off an exaggerated side part. It looks lacking on me both texlaxed and natural. I'm done trying. I think I look better with a slightly off centered "natural" part or a diagonal part.
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What does this mean? I have seen you reference your fine hair before but it looks pretty dense/thick to me. Is there a difference between dense and thick? :-)
 
Sosoothing said:
What does this mean? I have seen you reference your fine hair before but it looks pretty dense/thick to me. Is there a difference between dense and thick? :)
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Yes. I have very fine strands but not a lot of them on my head (density). My head is *maybe* medium density of fine strands of hair. But the strands themselves are flyaway thin. But because my hair texture is cottony, it looks like I have big hair but it's more like a cloud. If you were to go and put your hands into it, it's really soft and it collapses around your hand. I went to a natural hair meetup and one of my e-friends there was so surprised that she could part my fro with just a bobby pin and lay it down without much effort.

I just don't have the density for the deep side part to look good on me. Let me find photo evidence of what I'm talking about. Lol. :bookworm:
 
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To me, a braid out on straightened/relaxed hair looks like this:

onyc-hair-fro-out-braidout-result_watermarked.jpg


Hers is big and fuller looking. My hair looks more like this

69068138_156449865415410_9015121404041430116_n.jpg


My braidouts are much flatter, even when I cornrow instead of plait.

My avi is a pic of my side-parted cornrowed braidout on flat ironed NATURAL hair and it isn't this full. I was trying to find a better angle but it's on my detached hard drive somewhere. Lol

View media item 130435
Here's photo example of my braidout on straightened relaxed hair-

View media item 130433
View media item 130431
The ability to do braid outs and for them to last as braidouts is one of the reasons I decided to return to texlaxing. I pretty much do the same stuff to my hair that I did as a natural. But my braidouts and twistouts would turn into poufs the minute I stepped outside as a natural, even in the winter. And that was after 1-2 day wash day, setting the style and then waiting 1-2 more days for my hair to dry. So happy to not have to deal w that anymore, just facing the fact that my braidouts won't be big and fluffy because I just don't have the texture or density for it. :(
 
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Chrismiss said:
What's up glycerine?
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Glycerin itself isn't bad at all. Just not for my hair as a leave in. I try to stay away from humectants as leave ins because they require me to examine the humidity in the air and whether it's more or less than the moisture in my hair. I could never get it right, and my hair thrived without them so I just stay away. Lol.

However, I have DC'd w honey in the past, which is also a humectant. I think they work better for me in DC's than as a moisturizer or leave in.
 
GGsKin said:
I'm not relaxed anymore but I love to lurk in here. @MzSwift our hair responds in a very similar way to the same things (both in relaxed and natural states). I totally get you on the fine strands and medium density 'woes' smh:cheers:. You have a great way of explaining things. I really like your posts.
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Aww, thank you sis. :love2:

EvenPaltryHochstettersfrog-small.gif


I lurk in the natural threads too, Lol. I learned early on in the HHJ to look for ladies with similar hair characteristics instead of just curl type.
 
So TiTi was struggling and decided to put my hair up in some twist extensions. They'll still be in when my niece gets here so I'm just gonna show her the picture of my last length check.

I'm almost finished. I just have one, maybe two, more row(s) in the back. Right now they're pulled into a low ponytail to camouflage the unfinished part. I hope to keep these in for at least 4 weeks. I may even just stay in these for the first part of 2020. Start the new decade off right. Lol.
 
MzSwift said:
Glycerin itself isn't bad at all. Just not for my hair as a leave in. I try to stay away from humectants as leave ins because they require me to examine the humidity in the air and whether it's more or less than the moisture in my hair. I could never get it right, and my hair thrived without them so I just stay away. Lol.

However, I have DC'd w honey in the past, which is also a humectant. I think they work better for me in DC's than as a moisturizer or leave in.
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I stay away from products with glycerin or any humectants as well. I live in the desert. the dry air will be pulling all the moisture out and would make the hair even dryer.
 
So I plan on relaxing by new year's. :D:drunk: My amazon shipments finally came in. :alcoholics: I got a 20 oz jar of the Hawaiian Silky No Base Relaxer Mild, two 8 oz bottles of Isoplus Neutralizing Shampoo, a big tub of petroleum jelly, and a moisture-based deep conditioner in case neutralizing dries my hair out. Any thing else I should get? Or any horror stories about these products before I dive in? So excited, I just hope I don't feel any burning.

I decided to texlax because I realized I'd rather have chewed off relaxed hair until I get the hang of how to grow it healthy, than deal with detangling for not hours, BUT DAYS!!!! (because I can't sit for 3-6 hours and tackle it all at once most of the time, without usnig every ounce of patience and strength in my being, which is emotionally wayy too draining to go through any longer) and having to schedule my life around my natural hair anymore. Not being able to swim, or run in the rain, or walk past a cute guy confidently, or do styles I like, or wear nice outfits without feeling incomplete because I can't style this hair to match. I tried for 6 years. I don't have the money for anymore products just for them not to work, the time, or anymore of my youth to give away spent looking ratchet, to master making this natural thing work. And even if I did, I'd still have to dodge the rain and the sea, and take a day out to detangle and style my hair, just for it to last till bed time. I refuse. o_O

I'm honestly ready. I'm trying to achieve a natural looking result, but I want my hair to be very easy to detangle and style. That's the whole reason I'm doing it. I just can't anymore. Wish me luck, lol.
 
@FadingDelilah, I use the Hawaiian silky no base in mild too. I like the relaxer. It's able to get my hair really straight because I have thin strands. I liked that at first but I want fuller hair so I decided to texlax. I added lots of conditioner and oil to the relaxer and my came out looking like I didn't relax it. I was worried about the result at first but my hair was soft. If I do bantu knots it comes out straight. I couldn't get bantu knots to make my natural hair straight, it was still textured. Now that I have two months new growth, I can't tell the difference looking at my hair but I can feel the difference between the two. The texlaxed part is soft to touch while my natural hair feels hard and dry.
 
@FadingDelilah

You can do it! And we'll be here to help you brainstorm any solutions. I don't think you'll have chewed up hair. You've got knowledge of the basics from here. GL to you!

@abioni

Yes, that was a welcomed difference between my textured texlaxed hair and my natural hair. Even though it was just as textured, it was softer.
 
MzSwift said:
I don't think I asked in here, has anyone ever used Mane and Tail products?
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I don’t care for the shampoo or conditioner bc they make my hair hard, but I use the detangler often. I just bought Cabellina Mane and Tail conditioner and it’s interesting bc it’s mostly olive and coconut oil + amino acids and wheat protein. It made my hair feel strong but not soft so I’ll mix it with my fave SM Superfuit.
 
demlew said:
I don’t care for the shampoo or conditioner bc they make my hair hard, but I use the detangler often. I just bought Cabellina Mane and Tail conditioner and it’s interesting bc it’s mostly olive and coconut oil + amino acids and wheat protein. It made my hair feel strong but not soft so I’ll mix it with my fave SM Superfuit.
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Thank you!
I remember using it about 20 years ago because ppl said it "makes your hair grow" but it made my hair so hard and crispy and I threw it out. Protein is important for retention for me so I've been eyeing that again. That amino acid mix you mentioned sounds really good though. I'm going to look that one up too.
 
MzSwift said:
Thank you!
I remember using it about 20 years ago because ppl said it "makes your hair grow" but it made my hair so hard and crispy and I threw it out. Protein is important for retention for me so I've been eyeing that again. That amino acid mix you mentioned sounds really good though. I'm going to look that one up too.
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I found the Cabellina in the Hispanic section in CVS. Giant bottle for $7ish. Hope it works for you.
 
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