I really need some strong prayer warriors
I ask you to be in prayer for me, Ladies. I have a prayer and testomony.
I feel God has placed a calling on my life.It was around the time I graduated from college that my grandmother got sick, and I helped take care of her. After years of being a non church going Christian, I felt God convicting me and leading me to a deeper walk with Him. I started attending church with her, and have been doing so for the last six years since she died.
A few years ago after I graduated from college I started doing all the normal things people do to find out where their life is going. I got a job, and I started to move up as a professional. I met many powerful people, and God used me to do some awesome things. I thought I found the man I would marry., I bought a house. I put aside my "silly" dreams of writing, poetry, plays and music. "Wise" people advised me that they were just hobbies. I was depressed in my profession because as much as I tried to help eople amid the lies of politics, I knew Jesus was the real answer...we were at best playing doctor. To add insult to injury, my family (some of them) rejected my chosen profession and openly ridiculed my desire to hel others.
I had a horrible feeling that I was drowning in my own life. That's when I met a sister best friend who literally is my other half. You know how there are people you are just supposed to know? She was going through her own struggles at the time. She was also, literally a musical genius. We both knew God had called us to do something creative, but we both were so wrapped in our own struggles that we did not obey. Boy, God will make you obey.
Within three years I my job (boss lost an election), my boyfriend, (found out he was cheating on me & dumping me.), and my house due to the subprime mortgage crash. I have never felt so attacked. My biological sister became ill, and still is. My friend got ill and separated.
Ironically, God has removed everything I said was stopping me from doing what He asked except my fear of stepping out on faith.
Since Lent I have been fasting and praying with my best friend/sister because he has called us to begin a ministry that bridges the gap between church and community through the arts. God did a miracle. My sister/bestfriend was sick with a horrible infection that threatened her life...she was miraculously healed after singing at a church service. God made a way for us to rent a house together that my mother was struggling to find a tenant for. God then started opening the door for some doors for us to do the impossible. We bgan to get calls ....from literacy programs, conferences, concerts, juvenile halls to do workshops. We offered our gifts in love asking nothing, and just when we so broke we couldn't stand it an unepected check would come in the mail...a love token.
My sister friend and I started a free summer arts camp for adults and kids in the community. After a long day at work we'd head to church to teach music theory, dance, drama, and poetry. Most of the classes like that cost around $400, too much for many familes. We wanted the classes to be free. The way we figured it is that when Jesus fed the 5000, he said to the disciples not to send the hungry people away...he said "You feed them." The church often is feeding the stuffed. We don't evangelize anymore...we don't go to those who need not only to hear the word, but have their physical needs ministered to. Why send people into the world to learn something, when the world is not going to give them the message of salvation when we can do it as people of God?
It was hard. It hurt me that our pastor although he liked the idea of "looking good" was not supportive, because it wasn't his idea. Some members of other ministries felt we were "taking over" and not jump starting what they did, even though we tried to work with them. Others in the congregation were totally supportive. Some days I was so tired and broke I barely had enough to feed myself, and then there would be some needy young person who needed dinner, and I would get it for them, and try to speak a word of encouragement to them.
At the end of the summer camp we put together a play, that was outstanding. The kids did so good. It was beuatiful to see them grow and develop over six weeks. We have plans to do more events...a men's deleverance service to benefit prison recovery projects...another play to help battered women, more workshops at juvenile hall.
And like with anything God establishes, the devil attempts to distract and destroy. My sister and I had a difficult couple of months where other things have been placed to test our faith and our committment to what God has called us to do. I won't even go into how bad it got, but it was bad. I see those young people and I know God has sent us to help them.
I just really need some serious prayer on this ministry. I don't know how I am going to make it. My every resource is exhausted--Emotionally, physically, and financially. I'm not perfect. I know I am am flawed, and sometimes I wonder why me? There are many more talented, and more connected, than me. But I know that God is a provider. I'd like to be able to be financially freed so that I can devote more time to it. I just want a pure heart, ladies. My prayer is that my heart would be humble, and that God will give me the wisdom and the faith to answer this call. My faith is that God would use us as vessels to deliver his word. My all is on the alter, and I am waiting on God to do the impossible.
I didn't intend to go on this long, but I guess I just need to know that someone out there is standing in agreement with me.
Please pray for Jay and Mimi on all these things.
He also told me that before the year is over my BF will be gone and the "one" that God will send me will also be in my life before the year is over. My cousin also stated that the "one" will be between the ages of 32-35 years old, he is a church member and a member of the choir, has a job and a car. My mother was there and she stated that everything my cousin says always comes to pass. My cousin also said that I will become a minister.
