***Online Dating Support Thread***

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Man, if you think the men are bad, you guys should see some of the women's profiles :perplexed:

I know men look for different stuff than we do, but garish makeup? Really unflattering pictures? Hair not done at all? I can't tell if a bad weave is a turn off ro men, but I seen a few of those. Like really, really bad weave. The type that look like fashionable lamp shades :perplexed:

I was supposed to be creating a profile, but got side tracked :lol:
 
Talked to coffee date dude. So he called me out for being like 15 min (I was only late cuz he picked a Starbucks in downtown atl and had to find street parking) and said I should've apologized for being late. I honestly didn't think it was that serious at the time because I texted him and was like " im here just looking for a parking spot."

He then proceeds to say that he didn't buy me coffee cuz he didn't want to spend his money on someone who wasn't courteous enough to apologize for being late. So at this I was a little annoyed so I was just like its cool..glad you saved that $3.79. Then he's like "wow..and you're from Chicago?..I would expect this kind of disrespect from an ATL bird but not a Chicago girl." So at this point I didn't feel like going back and forth so I wished him well and kept it moving.
 
NaturallyBri87 said:
Talked to coffee date dude. So he called me out for being like 15 min (I was only late cuz he picked a Starbucks in downtown atl and had to find street parking) and said I should've apologized for being late. I honestly didn't think it was that serious at the time because I texted him and was like " im here just looking for a parking spot."

He then proceeds to say that he didn't buy me coffee cuz he didn't want to spend his money on someone who wasn't courteous enough to apologize for being late. So at this I was a little annoyed so I was just like its cool..glad you saved that $3.79. Then he's like "wow..and you're from Chicago?..I would expect this kind of disrespect from an ATL bird but not a Chicago girl." So at this point I didn't feel like going back and forth so I wished him well and kept it moving.
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Wowwww. He's an @sshole.
I only did the coffee date thing once. Imo, it's always best to vet them thoroughly and then go on a real date. You don't want to end up wasting your commute or energy on any more guys who aren't even worth a meet up.
 
NaturallyBri87 said:
Talked to coffee date dude. So he called me out for being like 15 min (I was only late cuz he picked a Starbucks in downtown atl and had to find street parking) and said I should've apologized for being late. I honestly didn't think it was that serious at the time because I texted him and was like " im here just looking for a parking spot."

He then proceeds to say that he didn't buy me coffee cuz he didn't want to spend his money on someone who wasn't courteous enough to apologize for being late. So at this I was a little annoyed so I was just like its cool..glad you saved that $3.79. Then he's like "wow..and you're from Chicago?..I would expect this kind of disrespect from an ATL bird but not a Chicago girl." So at this point I didn't feel like going back and forth so I wished him well and kept it moving.
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Is this a joke? He seriously said all this to you? What in the world.
 
:angry2:Ugh he need his rude assho3e ass beat

He sounds like a monster....

I am so annoyed for you! Ugh

NaturallyBri87 said:
Talked to coffee date dude. So he called me out for being like 15 min (I was only late cuz he picked a Starbucks in downtown atl and had to find street parking) and said I should've apologized for being late. I honestly didn't think it was that serious at the time because I texted him and was like " im here just looking for a parking spot."

He then proceeds to say that he didn't buy me coffee cuz he didn't want to spend his money on someone who wasn't courteous enough to apologize for being late. So at this I was a little annoyed so I was just like its cool..glad you saved that $3.79. Then he's like "wow..and you're from Chicago?..I would expect this kind of disrespect from an ATL bird but not a Chicago girl." So at this point I didn't feel like going back and forth so I wished him well and kept it moving.
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So I have a bit of a dilemma. I started my profile last night and put up some pics, but I realized I've gained some weight since these selfies were taken. About 10-20lbs? All of the pics were taken within the last 12 months though. Maybe I'm thinking too hard about it, but I'm wondering if I look way different now.
 
keyawarren said:
So I have a bit of a dilemma. I started my profile last night and put up some pics, but I realized I've gained some weight since these selfies were taken. About 10-20lbs? All of the pics were taken within the last 12 months though. Maybe I'm thinking too hard about it, but I'm wondering if I look way different now.
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at this point i only put one photo up because i swear guys get really unrealistic expectations about what you look like and im tired of them acting like i have to look exactly like i do in photos. i also mention if thats a problem then dont message me (im done playing with these fools :lol:)
 
keyawarren said:
Man, if you think the men are bad, you guys should see some of the women's profiles :perplexed:

I know men look for different stuff than we do, but garish makeup? Really unflattering pictures? Hair not done at all? I can't tell if a bad weave is a turn off ro men, but I seen a few of those. Like really, really bad weave. The type that look like fashionable lamp shades :perplexed:

I was supposed to be creating a profile, but got side tracked :lol:
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i like to go through the "similar users" link on my profile to see who okcupid thinks are comparable women to me. i notice most of the time they are older for some reason :lol:
 
CaraWalker said:
at this point i only put one photo up because i swear guys get really unrealistic expectations about what you look like and im tired of them acting like i have to look exactly like i do in photos. i also mention if thats a problem then dont message me (im done playing with these fools :lol:)
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In one photo I'm a size 6. I am currently a size 12...closer to a 10. But I don't know what it looks like to the outside world because my body is recovering from surgery and my shape is changing due to yoga. In fact my pants were falling down in my last class :lol:. So in short I'm in a weird transitional phase where I weigh heavy but look slim. It's a little annoying actually.
 
keyawarren said:
In one photo I'm a size 6. I am currently a size 12...closer to a 10. But I don't know what it looks like to the outside world because my body is recovering from surgery and my shape is changing due to yoga. In fact my pants were falling down in my last class :lol:. So in short I'm in a weird transitional phase where I weigh heavy but look slim. It's a little annoying actually.
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ahhhhh... ima go ahead and say a six to a 12 is a huge difference :lol: i carry a lot of weight but a 12 back to a 10 looks pretty significant on me. i would say new pics.
 
keyawarren said:
Do they look good though? :look:
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most of them are ww so idk :look: they tend to be highly educated and older as a pattern (some i clicked just now, one had a phd, one just graduated law school, and the one younger one is 24 med student at a great school). the personalities trend toward no nonsense, some bitter, some generic, so overall i think its fairly accurate except none seem to be the same age as me.

they tend to be average size to curvy, less likely to be straight up skinny.
 
CaraWalker said:
ahhhhh... ima go ahead and say a six to a 12 is a huge difference :lol: i carry a lot of weight but a 12 back to a 10 looks pretty significant on me. i would say new pics.
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My pics run the gamut though. Only in one pic I am a 6. The others show me creeping up to a 12 :look:. My beach pics have me at my thickest (skin pics). But I'm smaller than that now. I have 2 pics up there from last month. They'll be aight :look:

CaraWalker said:
most of them are ww so idk :look: they tend to be highly educated and older as a pattern (some i clicked just now, one had a phd, one just graduated law school, and the one younger one is 24 med student at a great school). the personalities trend toward no nonsense, some bitter, some generic, so overall i think its fairly accurate except none seem to be the same age as me.

they tend to be average size to curvy, less likely to be straight up skinny.
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:lol:
 
CaraWalker said:
i write bomb profiles. and im an intriguing individual :lol:

that and have you ever scanned through female profiles? *****es sound braindead and boring as ****. most chicks profiles hit on the same points from the same angles and write with the same goals in mind. my profiles arent like that, not just so i can be "different" but because thats not what i have to say. i think they use the word intriguing because they literally have actually read my profile and are impressed that it kept their attention (my profiles tend to be lengthy). i write though, writing is a thing i do, so i couldnt really write anything without keeping in mind that it has to capture and keep someone's attention.

the average chick's profile is like "i work at the thing and i enjoy doing the thing in my downtime. im fun and exciting and cheerful and pleasant. im flirty and coy and i want a guy who is this! they self consciously ramble about their interests and heavy-handedly try to flirt in a broad, appealing manner. the way most women try to make themselves desirable is incredibly generic. talk about work. talk about hobbies. talk about why you desperately want a boyfriend while trying not to sound desperate.

my profile is either like "here are some random things that i think which convey that i am funny and witty" or "im so over this **** LOL" or "here are a bunch of things we are all avoiding saying."

right now my profile is basically like "yeah, ive given up on the idea that online dating will work, but just in case you're interesting, here's what you'd get if you dated me."
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I saw some semi interesting profiles on he women's end. But again it was how they looked :perplexed:

Guys typically tell me I come off unpretentious and I seem down to earth. I am able to convey this in my profile somehow. This time around I did not write much. I kept it generic. Maybe I'll add stuff to it later down the line.

Dudes are literally taken aback when I saw my favorite food is pizza. I guess some women out there are pretending they only like the finer things like caviar and such. Whatever, I guess.
 
Online dating is easier when I am unapologetic about my decision making. It becomes stressful when I start to second guess myself. For example. I'll be in the middle of a conversation with a guy, and realize that this ain't it...even if he hasn't said anything "wrong". If I am not motiviated to keep the convo going then I just need to let it die.

Or, if I read an innocuous profile and decide, "no, just no". I need to stick with that. I have never ever gone lukewarm to excited about a dude. Either it's flowing or it's not.

Oh yeah. I'm also going back to cutting guys off at the end of the date my way. Getting cursed out last month was a fluke :lol:. I may seem mean-ish :look:. But it has always been effective.

All in all, doing things my way has preserved the quality of my dates. I'm going to continue to trust myself.
 
Explain to me how your longest relationship lasted less than a year but you have children?
I'm going to need him to clarify.
 
hunnychile said:
I just got a DM from a Z-list celeb. Not sure how to feel about this. :look:
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I got hit up from a member of fab five. I think that was the group. Anyway he was one of old timers who started the whole hip hop movement. I guess that claim to fame still drops panties? He had shaved like 15 years off of his age though. Smh.

Wait, was it him? :lachen:
 
NaturallyBri87 said:
Talked to coffee date dude. So he called me out for being like 15 min (I was only late cuz he picked a Starbucks in downtown atl and had to find street parking) and said I should've apologized for being late. I honestly didn't think it was that serious at the time because I texted him and was like " im here just looking for a parking spot."

He then proceeds to say that he didn't buy me coffee cuz he didn't want to spend his money on someone who wasn't courteous enough to apologize for being late. So at this I was a little annoyed so I was just like its cool..glad you saved that $3.79. Then he's like "wow..and you're from Chicago?..I would expect this kind of disrespect from an ATL bird but not a Chicago girl." So at this point I didn't feel like going back and forth so I wished him well and kept it moving.
Click to expand...
You dodged a bullet with this guy. All sorts of mean and bitter.
 
movingforward said:
I'm using coffee meets bagel app I like it. I only have one pic up. But I'll add a few more this weekend.

Also I'm going to give okc and pof a go. I promised myself a minimum of 10 dates this year.
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My friend mentioned this to me. How exactly does it work? You speak to one guy a day?
 
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