***Online Dating Support Thread***

bluediamond0829 said:
Yes I have to check into that thread because I just think he's a little much. He seems genuine but he is just laying it on really thick. I would hate for us to even meet and him and to see him on a level 100. I mean sometimes we can have some good convos and he can be really nice to talk to but I'm not losing sight of how thick he is laying it on right now.
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I think you should just take your time and actually see how it plays out...what he's like in person...get to know him. You don't know him at all yet so it's too soon to think he's genuine. Even starting out with that thought process can skew your perspective.... just give it time and find out who he is. These guys show their true colors both good and bad eventually but it's not something you can judge on phone convos over a week time.

The two front runners in my current rotation just got the boot...a few weeks ago , I thought they would be the last men standing and turns out the bottom two have risen to the top :lol: so ride the wave and keep meeting other people :yep:
 
MuziqizLyfe said:
I think you should just take your time and actually see how it plays out...what he's like in person...get to know him. You don't know him at all yet so it's too soon to think he's genuine. Even starting out with that thought process can skew your perspective.... just give it time and find out who he is. These guys show their true colors both good and bad eventually but it's not something you can judge on phone convos over a week time.
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i disagree. i think if you can identify THAT early on, and THIS clearly, that he is laying it on thick in a very insincere way, you're just wasting your time and effort to bother proving yourself right irl. when i get a real or strong bad vibe, i'm out, and even on mild ones that i let play out, i am almost never incorrect about it. its a waste of time imo, and im not a fan of most general "give a brother a chance" advice. too many men out there for that.

if the vibe isnt so strong then maybe roll the dice, but for something obvious and clearly noticeable, i personally aint got time. of course, it also depends on the woman; not every woman is a big vibe/intuition type. i rely HEAVILY on my intuitions to the point where they border on precognition, so i know when its time to heave ho.
 
CaraWalker said:
i disagree. i think if you can identify THAT early on, and THIS clearly, that he is laying it on thick in a very insincere way, you're just wasting your time and effort to bother proving yourself right irl. when i get a real or strong bad vibe, i'm out, and even on mild ones that i let play out, i am almost never incorrect about it. its a waste of time imo, and im not a fan of most general "give a brother a chance" advice. too many men out there for that.

if the vibe isnt so strong then maybe roll the dice, but for something obvious and clearly noticeable, i personally aint got time. of course, it also depends on the woman; not every woman is a big vibe/intuition type. i rely HEAVILY on my intuitions to the point where they border on precognition, so i know when its time to heave ho.
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Oh I agree with you...I was giving my 2 cents based on bluediamond saying he "seems genuine" even after saying he's laying it on thick ....encouraging her to not go on that but to actually find out if he really is based on facts and not just phone convos. I notice sometimes people get swept away with what dudes say and all the hype before finding out if any of it is really true. Now personally, if I had a dude saying all that to me, he would get blocked because it sounds crazy to be fixated on a person you never met :look: but I didn't want to label the dude as crazy
 
Can someone explain this to me?


Im 6'1. Have kidz. 2 college degree. Christian. Looking 4 that couple of 4EVER. Athletic. Try too keep well groomed. Work alcoholic. Can be a little but a wise ***. Bluntly honest. Romantic. etc etc....

I need to report him to his workplace and whatever school granted him 2 degrees.
 
i think a lot of people purposefully dont separate 4 year college degrees from 2 year college degrees. thats probably what he means.
 
I'm only a few hours in with 30 messages sitting in my inbox. All local losers. As soon as I uploaded my pictures my inbox got slammed. There is no way those guys had time to read my profile. We have nothing in common. I'm responding to every single one of them and asking them what in the world do they think we have in common? I just want to be a B today because they are wasting my time.

Then I'm going to reach out to the guys I'm interested in. I'm searching out of state. I wonder if there is a way to block local men.
 
ArcticFemme said:
I'm only a few hours in with 30 messages sitting in my inbox. All local losers. As soon as I uploaded my pictures my inbox got slammed. There is no way those guys had time to read my profile. We have nothing in common. I'm responding to every single one of them and asking them what in the world do they think we have in common? I just want to be a B today because they are wasting my time.

Then I'm going to reach out to the guys I'm interested in. I'm searching out of state. I wonder if there is a way to block local men.
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you on pof?
 
im messaging with this guy i went out with over a year and a half ago. we had a nice date but i knew he was moving at the end of summer. hes back in town now.

he was the good looking type that made everybody stare at us when we were out. it was so obvious that he commented on it (not sure if they always notice that people are looking). he asked if i noticed it and i said "theyre just looking because we make such an attractive pair." a few months ago i had a couple dates with an italian-from-italy phd student who was so much better looking than me the stares were embarassing. that guy was so attractive.
 
CaraWalker said:
he was the good looking type that made everybody stare at us when we were out. it was so obvious that he commented on it (not sure if they always notice that people are looking). he asked if i noticed it and i said "theyre just looking because we make such an attractive pair." a few months ago i had a couple dates with an italian-from-italy phd student who was so much better looking than me the stares were embarassing. that guy was so attractive.
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That's seriously one of my worst fears. :lol: I would hate to be out with a guy and people are thinking what is he doing with her? Don't get me wrong I do it too but it's not me. :look:
 
JustifiablyMe said:
That's seriously one of my worst fears. :lol: I would hate to be out with a guy and people are thinking what is he doing with her? Don't get me wrong I do it too but it's not me. :look:
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they were definitely thinking that :lol: no question. he was gorgeous in an extremely conventional way. like in a david beckham dilfy kind of way.

(un?)fortunately he was pretty dull, and when he kissed me his tongue was stiff like a spoon :lol:
 
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CaraWalker said:
you on pof?
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Girl NO! OKCupid. I'm mad that so many people know about OKCupid now. During college I had so much fun on that site because it was mostly intellectual, artistic types. When did all of these rednecks and broke busters from POF start signing up?

Maybe my eyes are deceiving me, but it looks like this guy is either shopped into the picture or is posing in front of some sort of green screen. Something doesn't look right.

spzvvm.png


Then there is this guy who is obviously East Indian who says in his profile he isn't Indian. When he messaged me I flat out asked him about his ethnicity and he replied... Indian :ohwell:. I don't do Indian guys and I don't appreciate him trying to trick me. Is it that serious?

Guys who like Anime creep me out. I have some female friends who are into Anime and Manga and they seem normal but the men come off as socially inept. As soon as I see Anime in a guy's profile, I'm turned off. All of these Anime-loving black dudes have ponytails.

I feel like I've walked into an M. Night Shyamalan movie about an alternate universe full of losers looking for love. Why don't these guys message women with whom they are compatible? I saw some profile of a 23 year old girl with 4 kids. All of her pictures were (clothed) booty shots in the bathroom. Her 4 children and the work alcoholic's two degrees would make for a happy, hood fairytale.
 
ArcticFemme said:
Can someone explain this to me?


Im 6'1. Have kidz. 2 college degree. Christian. Looking 4 that couple of 4EVER. Athletic. Try too keep well groomed. Work alcoholic. Can be a little but a wise ***. Bluntly honest. Romantic. etc etc....

I need to report him to his workplace and whatever school granted him 2 degrees.
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Is he serious?:perplexed

I refuse to believe that someone typed this foolishness out and expected a positive response. English clearly isn't his first, second or third language.
 
ArcticFemme said:
Girl NO! OKCupid. I'm mad that so many people know about OKCupid now. During college I had so much fun on that site because it was mostly intellectual, artistic types. When did all of these rednecks and broke busters from POF start signing up?

Maybe my eyes are deceiving me, but it looks like this guy is either shopped into the picture or is posing in front of some sort of green screen. Something doesn't look right.

spzvvm.png


Then there is this guy who is obviously East Indian who says in his profile he isn't Indian. When he messaged me I flat out asked him about his ethnicity and he replied... Indian :ohwell:. I don't do Indian guys and I don't appreciate him trying to trick me. Is it that serious?

Guys who like Anime creep me out. I have some female friends who are into Anime and Manga and they seem normal but the men come off as socially inept. As soon as I see Anime in a guy's profile, I'm turned off. All of these Anime-loving black dudes have ponytails.

I feel like I've walked into an M. Night Shyamalan movie about an alternate universe full of losers looking for love. Why don't these guys message women with whom they are compatible? I saw some profile of a 23 year old girl with 4 kids. All of her pictures were (clothed) booty shots in the bathroom. Her 4 children and the work alcoholic's two degrees would make for a happy, hood fairytale.
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:rofl: at this whole post!:lachen: that pic is too much.
 
keish33 said:
Lmao CaraWalker I'm a lurker but you're my bff in my head.

Since I'm here, I ran across some fitness chick on Instagram and much to my surprise, the "love of her life" tried to holla at me on pof about two or three months ago. Scrolling through their profiles, they were together at the time. We exchanged numbers but something didn't seem right and Im not really into yellow guys so I stopped talking to him. He's fine as hell but clearly my instincts were dead on. Oh, she's a white girl too...

Instincts ladies, instincts.
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I think I know who you are referring to
... he's a dog
 
I went on the best date I have ever been on! He is so delicious. But he was a marine for ten years, and is looking to serve in some other way (private contracting). *sigh* what to do with his attractive a**, he's a Pisces too so he's suppose to be perfect for my crazy scorpio butt.
 
CaraWalker said:
im glad where i live the intellectual/buster divide is still confined across sites.

whats the scoop here?
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I think the dude that keish33 is referring to is the same guy that was DMing me before he went on this "I'm not on dating sites" rant and started posting photos of ol girl every week.
 
I made a POF account but the all of the guys hitting me up or so ugly. I guess i'll go back to OKC.
 
dude ive been talking to asked if he could friend me on facebook. whyyyyyyyyyyyy do guys ask this before you meet? friending on facebook is the wooooooooorst. i dont know you, strange man!

then it occurred to me i could just lie and tell him i dont have one :lol: facebook is passe its not like a few years ago when everybody used it. (sidenote i cant believe "facebook" is such a huge part of human culture :lol:)
 
I think I might have to block this one guy. I shouldn't have even replied to him in the first place. He put his income as $20,000 - $30,000, and he's almost 40 with kids. He's broke. His first message was a question, which I answered. His next was his phone number, which I did not call. Now, he's been messaging me every few hours. I haven't even blocked him yet because I deleted the app.

One old guy messaged me, and I went to look at his profile to see if he was really that old. Of course it showed that I viewed his profile. While I am viewing it, he pops up and views my profile at the same time. Corny. :rolleyes:

I'm about to stop with this online dating. I can only look at so many profiles, then I get the mild urge to vomit. There is one guy I'm going out on a date with. He's not very good-looking in his photos, but he seems confident. His messages have been respectful. I like the way he asked me out. But if he turns out to be a weird creep, then that's it. Back to the offline world.
 
Ipanema said:
I think I might have to block this one guy. I shouldn't have even replied to him in the first place. He put his income as $20,000 - $30,000, and he's almost 40 with kids. He's broke. His first message was a question, which I answered. His next was his phone number, which I did not call. Now, he's been messaging me every few hours. I haven't even blocked him yet because I deleted the app.

One old guy messaged me, and I went to look at his profile to see if he was really that old. Of course it showed that I viewed his profile. While I am viewing it, he pops up and views my profile at the same time. Corny. :rolleyes:

I'm about to stop with this online dating. I can only look at so many profiles, then I get the mild urge to vomit. There is one guy I'm going out on a date with. He's not very good-looking in his photos, but he seems confident. His messages have been respectful. I like the way he asked me out. But if he turns out to be a weird creep, then that's it. Back to the offline world.
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I thought it was just me.

And yeah girl, you shouldn't have entertained that broke dude with kids.
 
I created a new POF account a few days ago and it's already about to get deleted. White guy sends me a message yesterday which simply said "Hey." I never respond to one word messages. Today he messages me again "Hi beautiful African Queen"...GTFOH!
 
I travel quite a bit and usually switch up my okc location to check out local guys.

Here are very thorough :lol: rankings on looks:

LA
London
NYC
SF
Chicago
Miami
Atlanta
Dallas
Austin
 
i was very pleased but not altogether shocked at the massive upgrade of attractiveness in men in new york. if i lived in ny i would exist in a higher league as far as looks go. here, the good looking men have standards that outpace their value because theyre scarcer. i met two guys when i was in ny for a week and both of them were a full two points more attractive overall than the average man that messages me at home. it was just what was normal. attractive people dont do all this extra **** like you see people who need validation do.

but let me not get into that, im trying to move away from prioritizing looks very much :lol: ive had some very attractive ones during my looks based tenure... but its time to move on from that.
 
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^^ I hear you. And as hard as it is to find someone serious to date here I'm glad that at least I'm in a city with more good looking men to choose from.

And I'm too vain to lower my standards. I need something nice to look at :look:
 
i actually really dont care all that much what he looks like. i was seeking attractive partners because i was more interested in being seen and what other people would think when they saw us together :nono: have to let that go.
 
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