***Online Dating Support Thread***

What is this MatchAffinity?
I subscribed to Match.com but I am getting messages from this other site.
I can't see their photos until I pay another subscription fee and can send 1 message for free.
 
So I made my feeler profile a real one. Though I hate my user name haha. These men are already dumb, you have nothing in your profile why should I care about you?
 
:nono: No word about Heather or her brother. Their sister had a detective go over to look at the house and computer. No activity with their ATM or credit cards.

This is terrible. Online or offline just use common sense with money and your body!
 
SUPER SWEET said:
:nono: No word about Heather or her brother. Their sister had a detective go over to look at the house and computer. No activity with their ATM or credit cards.

This is terrible. Online or offline just use common sense with money and your body!
Click to expand...

Wow, that's so awful...they should have just left it alone......
ETA did they file a missing persons report?
 
MizzBrown said:
After hiding my profile for 30 days, I decide to let it back up and I get a message from someone who's incarcerated. Why? :thud:

I think I'm going to hide my profile AGAIN...for 60 damn days this time. It's like I keep getting upset with the quality that I just LOG OFF..for weeks.
Click to expand...

MizzBrown Sorry,but people in jail can date on-line..I know they do pen-pals...That's scary!
 
SUPER SWEET said:
kweenameena
crlsweetie912
DarkJoy
prettyinpurple
anjelLuvsbabe
Another Star
Ok. Yes, I told Heather about the website POF a few months ago. But that's really it. I casually mentioned I met a few men on there and it wasn't that great. I gave her no rules of dating online because I didn't think I needed to tell a 45 year old how to date!

So she made a profile and started getting a "bid head" from all the messages that she received. I am finding this out second hand :giggle: her brother told me that she began to get down-right conceited. I do remember when we were out her phone was blowing up and she was busy on some weekends that I came home. I thought nothing about POF.....

Here's what went down.....
Heather started chatting with a dude from NY. He is younger actually about 15 years younger. He began to blow her head upppppppppppppp. She went to visit him within the 1st week of chatting, on her dime.:look: They stayed at his grandma's house since his apartment was getting renovated.
:ohwell: Everything was whirlwind:2inlove: according to her, he could do no wrong,she was getting rid of all the busters. After the first two hours they had s-x, unprotected:nono:. He told her that he would just use oil.:scratchch

The next weekend he wanted to visit her but his car needed to be fixed so she let him borrow the 1800.00 to get his car fixed via western union.

The next weekend his renovation was over so he couldn't come down since he had major cleaning up to do. She requested to visit again but he told her no because his mother was helping and thought she would get in the way. :spinning:

This past weekend she went to NY and he didn't show up to pick her up. She called the cell phone but got no answer. So she went to the grandma's house only to find out they didn't know anyone by that name.:moon: So she sat outside on the steps until the lady threaten to call the police on her.


Today I get a phone call telling me that I am an awful friend and she should fight me. If I were a good friend I would have prepared her for internet dating and would have told her the rules.

This is my fault all of this happen. :huh: If I would have told her to not give money or sex she would be in a better place. :blah: :blah: :blah:

So now we aren't friends anymore until I pay her back the money:lachen: NOT!
This is not my fault...
Click to expand...

Going to bed..After all that.. Shame!
 
I think I am about done. Just too much tomfoolery. WHY are 40 year old dudes still playing games, then get ANGRY when you don't accept foolishness.

This guy that I had been talking to (who I told was too busy to date and was supposed to be proving me wrong) were supposed to go out last night. So we talk an confirm details....five minutes later he calls to cancel (not the first time).......so he texts me...Sorry babe....wtf which I ignore...then calls me back.
I'm out with my co-worker having a few drinks after work. So he tries to talk and I'm like I thought you had something to do? He's like I know you not trying to flex cause you are in front of your friends...and I bust out laughing cause that's some high school mess and I'm a grown woman.....He hangs up.....:swearing::swearing::swearing::swearing:
And then sends me a text (again, who does that bs...)
Talking about he's not trying to be made a fool of my me joking him in front of my friends....WTF.....
So his *** is blocked.....I don't have time for kiddie games and foolishness...

This stuff is for the birds.....
I'm on my way to cat lady status....No mas for me....smh
 
Hi ladies, I never posted here but I wanted to share my experiences.
I signed up for OK Cupid in July. I really didn't take it seriously and expected nothing but funny stories to share with my girls over drinks. But I had two pretty good experiences (one didn't work out, I'll explain why but I still call it successful because I really had no expectations at all).

Well guy #1. Nice looking, engineer, 30 (I'm 27), home, car, no children, all of the minimum requirements. Our first date was to Cheesecake Factory, we hit it off really well. We hung out regularly (sometimes daily since I was on break from grad school) until recently (like very recent. I'm still trying to fade to black now). The problem arrived when I started to notice his mannerisms. They are feminine and the more comfortable he got around me, the more uncomfortable I began to feel with the situation. I tried to chalk it up to him being raised by women but I can't make excuses. I was beginning to feel uneasy. I started to ask him but decided not to bother. I know he'd say no and probably be offended and I wouldn't believe him anyway.

Guy #2. We had chatted a little on the site and in mid conversation I disabled my profile. I was just annoyed with the small talk. Well after talking my coworker into signing up, I decided to reactivate and he messaged me again. Long story short, I am in LIKE! He's 32, very cute, corp america, home, car, no children, all the minimum requirements. We've gone out a few times since last week and pretty much talk each other to sleep every night. I'm excited about getting to know him better.

I will keep you ladies posted on the progress.
 
I was giving up on dating until spring and forgot about my Match profile.

Some fine a-- white man who is a financial advisor with mba msg me. Unfortunately I see that all his preferences are the opposite of me: white, athletic, childless. I'm black fat and have a 6yo :lachen:

I point this out to him and he says not to worry he still wants to get to know me. Then asks for my number. Of course I'm suspicious. Haven't given the digits yet. Idk how to take this. What you wise women think?
 
DarkJoy said:
I was giving up on dating until spring and forgot about my Match profile.

Some fine a-- white man who is a financial advisor with mba msg me. Unfortunately I see that all his preferences are the opposite of me: white, athletic, childless. I'm black fat and have a 6yo :lachen:

I point this out to him and he says not to worry he still wants to get to know me. Then asks for my number. Of course I'm suspicious. Haven't given the digits yet. Idk how to take this. What you wise women think?
Click to expand...

You know DarkJoy I am taking a different approach to dating. Just go with the flow and don't take it too seriously.

Think about it...you find him attractive so what harm can it do to talk to him? What harm can it do to go on a date? You may have fun for one evening, you may never see him again or you may go on to see him more and more. Who knows eh?

Just like our preference might be a black man, we are still quietly open to other races. This could go for white men too. He simply liked what he saw in your profile.
 
Guess what? We had breakfast again. :lachen: This is getting ridiculous but it really works for my schedule. He is nice, but more of an activity partner. I can't see us wallering around in the bed. His body isn't my type nor his size. Although he is someone that you can take to a professional event and would be the bell of the ball due to his intelligence and class he has been showing. :up: So i'll just keep doing activities with him. This weekend he wants to go golfing.
 
Bublin said:
He simply liked what he saw in your profile.
Click to expand...

Aww thank you Bublin. Your advice is good and honest! I appreciate you taking the time. What I quoted above is exactly what he said.

I try not to take it too seriously, but being the POLAR opposite kinda set me back... I was starting to get paranoid--feeling set up! I'm cray, I know that....:spinning: He is also SUPER fit--I usually just drool at those guys from a distance :lol:. His profile, however, likes and dislikes, interests and religion, and everything else he wrote about his INSIDES is pretty much the same as mine.

We only exchanged 3 msgs so far. I'm wary but might give up the numbers. If we proves to be a fool, I'll just stop talking to him. Same as errbody else. :yep:
 
DarkJoy you are at least getting attention from someone you find attractive.

I'm still getting messages from really low quality and very unattractive men. Not one good looking man sends me a message. They all pass me by. I don't understand it.
 
Bublin said:
@DarkJoy you are at least getting attention from someone you find attractive.

I'm still getting messages from really low quality and very unattractive men. Not one good looking man sends me a message. They all pass me by. I don't understand it.
Click to expand...

@Bublin--dont be fooled! Out of the, say, 2 dozen men that have contacted me all summer, this is only the 3rd one with a job, car, his own apartment, education.. Everyone else? Loser-ville! this is probably why I'm so nervous! lol

I only met one other guy in person of this 'caliber' (at least on paper), who was a delicious :lick: Nigerian-born (but very Americanized) BM, computer engineer, super muscular & fit marathon runner, and maybe 2 inches taller than me-I'm 5'0!! Anyway, we only went out once...guess he didnt like my comment on his height :giggle:

I promise not to be obnoxious this time... we'll see how it goes...

And don't you fret--you'll be paranoid like me when someone who has a life and REAL credentials comes along. lol!
 
Thanks FelaShrine. Not paranoid like that--more like wth are his intentions? Can tell by looking at him he hasn't had any real exposure to black people...and of course, I'm not his physical ideal as he states in his profile.
 
This guy here is fine, but his about me is so so annoying and he seems like a douche:
You can get to know me if you have a slim, petite, athletic body not overweight or fat and you have big, thick or fat nipples, small breast. You have a sexy body, mind, and spirit. You are honest, intelligent, respectful, independent, beautiful both inside and out, fun, NOT CRAZY, nice smile.

I have a strong relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I am a Christian not a Holy Roller. I have Morals and Values. Ladies Only. IF YOU FIT THE DESCRIPTION IN MY ADD YOU CAN MESSAGE ME AND GET TO KNOW ME. IF NOT DO NOT CONTACT ME. I AM NOT INTERESTED. IF YOU HAVE NO PICS ON YOUR PROFILE. DO NOT CONTACT ME. IF YOU HAVE NO REAL PICS OF YOURSELF AND YOU CANNOT BE HONEST ABOUT WHO YOU ARE. DO NOT CONTACT ME. DO NOT SEND ME ANY STUPID MESSAGES. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED AND DELETED. LADIES ONLY. NO LIARS OR FAKES. Take Care.
Click to expand...
 
I created a profile per the advise of a friend. Anyway, a older man just wrote this:

I Would Love to Spoil You!

Hello. My name is Kevin. How is life treating you in NY? Here is more about me not in my profile. I am easy going, generous, honest, and open. I am certified drama free.

I design and modernize large scale computer systems that are antiquated. I am also opening up a clothing and shoe boutique. Do you like dressing nicely?

I love traveling, movies and plays. I enjoy cooking, comedies, entertaining, and attending sporting events. I am a youth football league coach.

My vitals are that I am 6'2 tall. I was born and raised in Washington, D.C. I just built my dream home of 7,100 sq ft. I have worked hard all my life, now I am enjoying the fruits of my labor.

I hope to hear from you soon.​


I don't do dating websites because I need to be infront of a man to read him.

Help?
@barbiesocialite @PretteePlease @Curlee_lurker
 
Last edited:
sj10460 said:
I created a profile per the advise of a friend. Anyway, a older man just wrote this: I Would Love to Spoil You!

Hello. My name is Kevin. How is life treating you in NY? Here is more about me not in my profile. I am easy going, generous, honest, and open. I am certified drama free.

I design and modernize large scale computer systems that are antiquated. I am also opening up a clothing and shoe boutique. Do you like dressing nicely?

I love traveling, movies and plays. I enjoy cooking, comedies, entertaining, and attending sporting events. I am a youth football league coach.

My vitals are that I am 6'2 tall. I was born and raised in Washington, D.C. I just built my dream home of 7,100 sq ft. I have worked hard all my life, now I am enjoying the fruits of my labor.

I hope to hear from you soon. I don't do dating websites because I need to be infront of a man to read him. Help?
@barbiesocialite @PretteePlease
Click to expand...

sj10460

full of sh*t. :look:

and/or poser = meaning he may have those things/assets but its not exactly the way he makes it sound/seem. Kinda like when you bs a resume.

also, he's giving too much voluntary info. if he was in the know in DC, he would know that it would be easy for a woman thats in the "know" to find out who he is as well. DC is a small place.

furthermore, you need to find out if he is divorced and how many children he has because those things = child support payments/alimony. Also, clothing stores dont generate a lot of money--esp not right off the bat, thats what a "paid" man gifts his gf or wife. :look: So again that adds a "? hmm" in my mind.

IDK if you're bored, play along. If about the biz looking for a serious SO time to get down to brass tax and don't bs with the questions you need to ask him--esp since he's older. You don't have to beat around the bush when older men come into play. IDK, i'd smirk at him unless he sent me something worthwhile in the mail via my wishlist. :look:


eta: Oh yea, any man that calls himself generous is usually a martyr or self-applauding type. RUN. :lol:
 
barbiesocialite there's no "smirk" feature...I'm so clueless...my profile doesn't even have anything that would suggest that I would want someone to contact me along those lines...idk if this is bait from the guy I am dating...if somehow he found my profile lol idk..so you would just say hello?
 
barbiesocialite said:
@sj10460

full of sh*t. :look:

and/or poser = meaning he may have those things/assets but its not exactly the way he makes it sound/seem. Kinda like when you bs a resume.

also, he's giving too much voluntary info. if he was in the know in DC, he would know that it would be easy for a woman thats in the "know" to find out who he is as well. DC is a small place.

furthermore, you need to find out if he is divorced and how many children he has because those things = child support payments/alimony. Also, clothing stores dont generate a lot of money--esp not right off the bat, thats what a "paid" man gifts his gf or wife. :look: So again that adds a "? hmm" in my mind.

IDK if you're bored, play along. If about the biz looking for a serious SO time to get down to brass tax and don't bs with the questions you need to ask him--esp since he's older. You don't have to beat around the bush when older men come into play. IDK, i'd smirk at him unless he sent me something worthwhile in the mail via my wishlist. :look:


eta: Oh yea, any man that calls himself generous is usually a martyr or self-applauding type. RUN. :lol:
Click to expand...

Pretty much :yep:.
 
sj10460 said:
@barbiesocialite there's no "smirk" feature...I'm so clueless...my profile doesn't even have anything that would suggest that I would want someone to contact me along those lines...idk if this is bait from the guy I am dating...if somehow he found my profile lol idk..so you would just say hello?
Click to expand...


yes but I'm a natural oppurtunist. :look: I'll say hi to anyone that doesnt offend or annoy me-- but thats in general irl and online. HOWEVER, I would not have high expectations for this dude at at all---Particularly since he was trying to impress without warrant to do so. That said, my response would literally be "hi. thank you for the interest. what made you send this message?" :look: (you might not want to listen to me, I have no filter :lol:)
 
sj10460-I know you didn't mention me but fwiw, not only did he tmi you way too soon he didn't ask a single question about you. Everything would be all about him. He's told you that upfront by not inquiring about your profile and interests...

But...I'm also an opportunist...if you desire to feel him out and see then do so. He may want to feel important by playing the knight for a little while :look:
 
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