Not able to cook; a deal breaker?

[amberangel4u]

I am on vacay and decided to cook my DH his favorite meal "oxtails, rice & beans, fresh cabbage, and sweet plantains. (this is a treat, since we usually eat lean and healthy). My hubby between bites told me " you know this is one of the many reasons why I married you"!
So is this a deal breaker; if you, as my DH loves to say " can't put your foot in it?"

 

[Lilmama1011]

i feel like every adult should know how to cook. you eat right? so regardless of sex you better know how to cook to survive

 

[Oasis]

im not sure i understand the question. are you asking is it a deal breaker for most men? or a deal breaker for women if a man can't cook?

my partner does 99% of the cooking. occasionally, i'll steam some rice and throw some chicken in there but im no cook. i think most men would prefer a woman who can throw down or "put her foot in it" but it really depends on the man.

for me, it wouldnt be a deal breaker but he would be coming out of pocket for a lot of take out since i dont cook.

 

[MsLauren]

It depends on two different scenarios for me. Is it that the person doesn't know how to cook or does the person just refuses to cook?

I was raised in a small family and my mom was gone a lot because she was in the military. So a lot of times at home it was just my dad and me, so I definitely lacked in the cooking department when I met my DH. On the other hand, my DH was from a large family (mainly women) and knows how to throw down in the kitchen!

I always wanted to learn how to cook so my DH actually taught me everything I know in the kitchen.

If I was with someone who didn't know how to cook AND didn't even want to learn, or even wanted to cook at all, it would definitely be a deal breaker. But not knowing how to cook but willing to learn is not a deal breaker to me.

Just my two cents

 

[amberangel4u]

im not sure i understand the question. are you asking is it a deal breaker for most men? or a deal breaker for women if a man can't cook?

my partner does 99% of the cooking. occasionally, i'll steam some rice and throw some chicken in there but im no cook. i think most men would prefer a woman who can throw down or "put her foot in it" but it really depends on the man.

for me, it wouldnt be a deal breaker but he would be coming out of pocket for a lot of take out since i dont cook.

I guess I really meant for a women not to cook. My male friends state this is a requirement. My DH can cook just as well as I, so we usually take turns.

 

[ladysaraii]

We can't answer this, it depends on the man. I know families where the wives cook and families where the husbands do the cooking. Whatever works for them

 

[SincerelyJane]

I don't know if it's as big of a deal as guys like to say. I cook pretty well, always have, but it's never been something that was make or break in my relationships. It's a superficial quality. Usually my personality, character, and overall compatibility seemed to matter way more. But it never hurts.

 

[SwtAnana]

I'm sure for some men this would be a deal breaker and that for others it wouldn't. I would think that if a man really wants you though, he's not going to care about the cooking part. I've met plenty of married men who've said that their wives can't cook. My fiancé is the cook (but I bring the spices cuz lawwwwwwd that man likes plain tasting food)and while I enjoy cooking, I just don't have the energy.

I'm an okay cook....no where near my mother who can literally grab random ingredients from the pantry and make a delicious meal. Growing up, she ALWAYS kicked me out of the kitchen and made me go study, which explains how far I've gone academically while my kitchen skills are average at best. I loved it when she tried to finally teach me when I was in college and already out of the house....I was like "Yeah ok...too late. I have no interest "

Either way, my fiancé knew what he was getting....I did NOT try to fake the funk to make it seem like I was a great cook....ordering takeout and pretending like I slaved over a hot stove all day So in my case it was not a deal breaker

 

[nlamr2013]

I think youre asking on the wrong forum lol
We cant answer for all men only men weve dealt with but I will say many women who cant even boil water are married or in a relationship so clearly for some men cooking isnt important

 

[okange76]

If you plan on marrying an African man, it most likely will be a big deal breaker. Cooking is huge especially for family parties, weddings, funerals etc Off course there are exceptions but it would be in your best interests not to be caught unprepared.

 

[sounbeweavable]

I've never had a guy say that to me, but I've never asked either because I CAN cook well. When I cooked for my last boyfriend, he told me my food was like high quality, nice restaurant food, and I know he meant it because he grew up in a well off family and they always ate out because his mom couldn't cook.

I think how important cooking abilities are to a man depends on how good of a cook his mother was and whether or not he can cook well. Like seriously… SOMEONE in the household has to cook. Otherwise you'll be eating out all the time (like my ex's family) or eating some seriously bland food.

 

[topnotch1010]

I think that knowing how to cook is a serious plus, but not a deal breaker if you can't. Every adult should know how to cook. It's unhealthy to eat out all of the time.

 

[PeaceFlow]

Since I see women who can't cook in relationships/marriages I'm guessing they get by fine. Men out there for everyone

 

[Briabiggles]

I can cook but I really don't think it would make a difference to my SO if I could or not. He loves to cook. As long as I like to EAT he's happy!

 

[Godyssey]

For my husband it is not a deal breaker at all. I don't know any men that that is a deal breaker for. I think that most men enjoy being cooked for. My husband loves it on the rare occasions that I do cook (not that I cook like the OP), but he loves to cook as well. We both prefer getting dressed up and eating out more than anything. I think if I didn't like getting dolled up and going out it would be a deal breaker.

 

[PureSilver]

I can only speak for myself but literally 3 nights ago my SO said thats one of the things he loves about me is that i'm a good cook. Now i'm a foodie at heart for myself and i don't claim to be a chef but to hear him say that was nice.

He did tell me early on that one of the things he need in his life is a decent cook, we do eat out occasionally but we both prefer home cooked meals, Also he has taught me a few things in the kitchen himself and i made use of it and do appreciate it.

To each his own and while it may be a deal breaker for some, others are content with their partner (woman) not being able as you ladies would say "throw it down".