More than 1 man

I am currently dating 4 but sleeping with only one. He is my main boo and all the others are just backups for when I want to do something different.
 
IMO, most women make the mistake of focusing on ONE guy exclusively too soon in a relationship when guy remain "open" to dating multiple people at one time.

You don't have to sleep with everyone you DATE - I've learned to loosen up. ;)
 
patient1 said:
Okay!!!! In complete agreement. What's sad is that had a few of the "responses" not been here, we'd ALL be more enlightened. Not only would Cichelle have delved deeper but perhaps others would have shared as well. There's an art to inquiring.

Oh well. . .invite me for tea Cichelle. :) We can share stories.

p1
Click to expand...

Well said! I'd love to have tea with Cichelle too... Not only to discuss this topic, but so many others. Cichelle is one of the women I admire most on this board. Beautiful, INTELLIGENT and through her words exudes extraordinary class.
 
Sh*t, I need a sex man and a money man!! Just kidding. If you let everyone know that you are not exclusive with anyone, then I dont think there is a problem. But do remember to protect yourself at all times.

And when you start having sex with men, things change. Someone will alway start to want mo. Could be you and could be him..
 
LadyChe said:
Now as for me, I've got a couple of men on the roster. My main guy is here and the rest are around the country. And when mama is out of town.... mama is OUT OF TOWN. :cool:
Click to expand...

I ain't mad, DO IT MAMA! :lol:
 
sb44 said:
Well said! I'd love to have tea with Cichelle too... Not only to discuss this topic, but so many others. Cichelle is one of the women I admire most on this board. Beautiful, INTELLIGENT and through her words exudes extraordinary class.
Click to expand...

I'd be willing to travel to chat & have 'tea' with Cichelle, P1 and a few others...:grin:

What a time we'd have....:lol:
 
JFemme said:
I'd be willing to travel to chat & have 'tea' with Cichelle, P1 and a few others...:grin:

What a time we'd have....:lol:
Click to expand...

I'm bringing Tazo Passion Tea and some Maple syrup. When are we meeting??? OR we could have Champagne at Glen Ivy? I'll be in LA before the year's up.

On topic: This is a discussion I've had with many different people over the years. Relationships can feed you on so many different levels. Some nourish your intellect while others do so for your body...or your emotions...or your spirit. It is encouraging to know that people elect not to starve any part of their Self and conform.

I'm done on the subject until teatime. :)

p1
 
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Cincysweetie said:
Yes. I think of it like having a team. Every now and then, I retire someone out and bring in a rookie. Some become "club favorites", others are traded after a brief time. I'm young, I like talking to/dating multiple guys, and I always let them know that I have other friends. I'm more conservative about sex though, not everyone on the team gets a chance at bat. ;)
Click to expand...

Love it! :grin:
 
i'm single so I date more than one guy at a time. I only have sex with one though or I don't have sex at all. I tried the multiple boyfriends thing and it is way too complicated
 
I'll date more than one at a time...I don't think there is anything wrong with exploring options...dating is just dating to me...now I will not have more than one boyfriend...being deceitful and having folks believe that you are exclusive when you aren't isn't cool and it leads to too many problems.
 
Me personally, I have different male friends. I don't see anything wrong with it, as we are not having SEX. Some of them I dated and some have just started off platonic from jump.
 
lol at the time i think i had one man and 3 dates

they used to give me money and be my friend



i now have one man and one only!! i feel i should date until we get engaged or sumthing though, or move i nwith each other cos i'm kinda sprung!
 
Candy_C said:
lol at the time i think i had one man and 3 dates

they used to give me money and be my friend



i now have one man and one only!! i feel i should date until we get engaged or sumthing though, or move i nwith each other cos i'm kinda sprung!
Click to expand...


well, i am kind of like you use to be except I don't accept money (most of the time) because I don't want them to get it twisted and think it will be something serious.

I told one of my friends (the main guy) and he got extremely upset. All I said was, "I have male friends just like you have female friends." He said, "They're just friends? Did any use to be your boyfriends?" I said, "Well, some of them I've dated before but it didn't work out so we are just friends now." He went passive-ballistic telling me how I basically shouldn't be dating more than one guy at a time. I didn't even tell him outright I was dating some of my "friends" so just imagine if I would have.

At least I was being up front because if you see me somewhere with a man and we look romantically involved, don't say I didn't tell you. Ok, I didn't but still.:grin:
 
I like having my options, I just can't seem to handle the multiples-ex thing though.
  • There was a time when I did, and BOY did I have a good time. ....but that's my past, and I like making "Love" more than I like having great "sex".
 
I haven't read this entire post, but it seems like I maybe the odd woman out. I've dated two guys at once and slept with both. Not proud of it. My original guy (which is now my husband=s) wasn't acting as I wanted him to. We weren't in a official relationship which was part of the problem, so I picked up a new guy=h. Also wasn't in official relationship with H. I started dating H to make S jealous. Me, S, and my bestfriend went out to a club and we had to drop my bestfriend off at her boyfriend. Her Bf and H were cousins and lived together. So now we got S in H's front yard at 3am acting a hot mess. It was funny to me, but I was kinda drunk. H was still trying to talk to me, but I was in love with S and couldn't deal with H anymore. I'm fully comitted to my husband and I can't fathom the thought of letting anyone get so close to me as he is emotionally or physically.
 
No more monogamous "dating" for me. It's too annoying.

Dating is like interviewing to me. You shouldn't stop looking for jobs because you found one you like. Make sure they feel the same through some sort of contract first. :yep:
 
Recently I've been dating more than 1 guy... actually 3. 1 knew about the others and the other 2 didn't. That one that knows doesnt believe things are as serious with the other two as they really are.

No I dont feel bad about it. :grin:

Finally 1 of them said he knew I was dating other people (Forgot to put my phone on silent..that was a bad day) and dumped me because I wasn't "honest". Whatever!! The way things are looking he'll be back in the line up soon.

As far as nookie, well...I'm not putting myself in a position to be in a Maury.."who's my baby daddy" situation thats for sure :nono:

Up until this year I was always putting my eggs in 1 basket and getting my face cracked. This way I'm detached enough from each situation to not really care and life has never been better. I can't believe I wasn't doing this sooner.
 
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Ain't a dayum thing wrong with having more than one man. Hell, men do it all the time. It's called OPTIONS. Why not?? As long as your single, a woman should always have OPTIONS. Not saying you sleep with all of them, but you get the picture. I believe a woman should have more than one man who serves his purpose. For example.

1. Every woman has that one friend, that no matter what, car breaks down, need something from the store, something gets broke in the house..she calls on who? Yeah, him. Let's call him "ole faithful." This one you don't sleep with. Dis one will stay around cuz men like to feel needed and special. :ohwell: You just say..."aww ur such a sweetie...want something to eat" fix him a plate chit chat with him for a min and let him go on bout his bidness.

2. Then you have that one who you only speak to once in a while, you know...keep your foot in the door. You call him when you need money, or you saw an outfit you wanted, etc. Let's call him "Mista finance". He's the older dude. You ain't sleepin with this one eitha, but you make him think that ONE day he'll at least get to :lachen: Sad, but true..yall know what I'm tawkin bout....

3. Then you got that one ...yall know...the one who likes to go shopping with you, gossip, etc. Thats ur gay buddie. Let's call him "Shuga". He always down for some good gossip, but at the same time gives you advice on men....knows the latest fashion, etc.

4. Then you got that one, when all else fails (the LAST resort) and you have been through your cell phone list, rolodex, or however u keep your men filed, but it's always that one you call for strictly a booty call. He knows wassup. Call him up and be like..(No matter what time you call, he always answers on the second ring...) "yeah..whatchu doin"...then he'll say "nuffin, why wassup"....Yeah, he know wassup, but he can only come by at night so as not to be seen by them nosey a$$ neighbors. Get him, feed him beans n keep it movin...roll his a$$ on up outta there ...ain't no baskin in the after glow and pillow talkin... sista gotta get up n go to work in the morning.

5. Then you got that one you REALLY want, but you slow walk him. See, he playin hard to get and you haven't quite figured him out yet, but you workin on it....done told all ur girls bout him and everything....this one will take some time and you hope it's worth it.

6. Then you go the ones that who lives at home wif his momma and sister, tryiing to get it together, but he just need someone to listen to him. He's your phone buddy....nothing more to elaborate cuz he live at home....:nono:

7. Then you got the one you kickin it with...you feelin him he feelin you, but no relationship has been established. He's whatchu call the "meanwhile back at da ranch" type dude. Mess with him til something better comes along.

Uh huh....das wassup.
 
dannie_19 said:
Recently I've been dating more than 1 guy... actually 3. 1 knew about the others and the other 2 didn't. That one that knows doesnt believe things are as serious with the other two as they really are.

No I dont feel bad about it. :grin:

Finally 1 of them said he knew I was dating other people (Forgot to put my phone on silent..that was a bad day) and dumped me because I wasn't "honest". Whatever!! The way things are looking he'll be back in the line up soon.

As far as nookie, well...I'm not putting myself in a position to be in a Maury.."who's my baby daddy" situation thats for sure :nono:

Up until this year I was always putting my eggs in 1 basket and getting my face cracked. This way I'm detached enough from each situation to not really care and life has never been better. I can't believe I wasn't doing this sooner.
Click to expand...


Exactly! Ive been trying not to do that again but here yet again Im starting too because Im not really compatible to the other guys as compared to one. We havent a conversation about who Im dating or if Im dating anyone else but as far as Im concerned Im a free agent. Last year I learned my lesson disgracefully.
 
leona2025 said:
I haven't read this entire post, but it seems like I maybe the odd woman out. I've dated two guys at once and slept with both. Not proud of it. My original guy (which is now my husband=s) wasn't acting as I wanted him to. We weren't in a official relationship which was part of the problem, so I picked up a new guy=h. Also wasn't in official relationship with H. I started dating H to make S jealous. Me, S, and my bestfriend went out to a club and we had to drop my bestfriend off at her boyfriend. Her Bf and H were cousins and lived together. So now we got S in H's front yard at 3am acting a hot mess. It was funny to me, but I was kinda drunk. H was still trying to talk to me, but I was in love with S and couldn't deal with H anymore. I'm fully comitted to my husband and I can't fathom the thought of letting anyone get so close to me as he is emotionally or physically.
Click to expand...

Most women have, just dont think they're gonna admit it online

and expecially here where photos of their face are around :yep:
 
chicacanella said:
well, i am kind of like you use to be except I don't accept money (most of the time) because I don't want them to get it twisted and think it will be something serious.

I told one of my friends (the main guy) and he got extremely upset. All I said was, "I have male friends just like you have female friends." He said, "They're just friends? Did any use to be your boyfriends?" I said, "Well, some of them I've dated before but it didn't work out so we are just friends now." He went passive-ballistic telling me how I basically shouldn't be dating more than one guy at a time. I didn't even tell him outright I was dating some of my "friends" so just imagine if I would have.

At least I was being up front because if you see me somewhere with a man and we look romantically involved, don't say I didn't tell you. Ok, I didn't but still.:grin:
Click to expand...


I never tell them!!!!!!!

I want to remain an angel in their eyes

least ur being honest

but i wouldnt have tol him, if he saw me he saw me i would deal with it then
 
I have dated more than 1 guy for the most part throughout college. Now that I work and moved back home with my parents that really isn't an option right now because they are ALWAYS in my business because they are "concerned" :spinning:. When I get back into dating mode again (hopefully before this summer is out) I plan on going back to dating different guys ( no I am not interested in sleeping with anyone even though if I did it would be with a condom but I saw the commericals about herpes statistics and decided heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell no).

To be totally honest even though I like being in relationships I had the MOST fun when I was dating different guys. I was not sleeping with all of them but it did show me that you dont have to be tied down to one man.
 
ThatJerseyGirl said:
Ain't a dayum thing wrong with having more than one man. Hell, men do it all the time. It's called OPTIONS. Why not?? As long as your single, a woman should always have OPTIONS. Not saying you sleep with all of them, but you get the picture. I believe a woman should have more than one man who serves his purpose. For example.

1. Every woman has that one friend, that no matter what, car breaks down, need something from the store, something gets broke in the house..she calls on who? Yeah, him. Let's call him "ole faithful." This one you don't sleep with. Dis one will stay around cuz men like to feel needed and special. :ohwell: You just say..."aww ur such a sweetie...want something to eat" fix him a plate chit chat with him for a min and let him go on bout his bidness.

2. Then you have that one who you only speak to once in a while, you know...keep your foot in the door. You call him when you need money, or you saw an outfit you wanted, etc. Let's call him "Mista finance". He's the older dude. You ain't sleepin with this one eitha, but you make him think that ONE day he'll at least get to :lachen: Sad, but true..yall know what I'm tawkin bout....

3. Then you got that one ...yall know...the one who likes to go shopping with you, gossip, etc. Thats ur gay buddie. Let's call him "Shuga". He always down for some good gossip, but at the same time gives you advice on men....knows the latest fashion, etc.

4. Then you got that one, when all else fails (the LAST resort) and you have been through your cell phone list, rolodex, or however u keep your men filed, but it's always that one you call for strictly a booty call. He knows wassup. Call him up and be like..(No matter what time you call, he always answers on the second ring...) "yeah..whatchu doin"...then he'll say "nuffin, why wassup"....Yeah, he know wassup, but he can only come by at night so as not to be seen by them nosey a$$ neighbors. Get him, feed him beans n keep it movin...roll his a$$ on up outta there ...ain't no baskin in the after glow and pillow talkin... sista gotta get up n go to work in the morning.

5. Then you got that one you REALLY want, but you slow walk him. See, he playin hard to get and you haven't quite figured him out yet, but you workin on it....done told all ur girls bout him and everything....this one will take some time and you hope it's worth it.

6. Then you go the ones that who lives at home wif his momma and sister, tryiing to get it together, but he just need someone to listen to him. He's your phone buddy....nothing more to elaborate cuz he live at home....:nono:

7. Then you got the one you kickin it with...you feelin him he feelin you, but no relationship has been established. He's whatchu call the "meanwhile back at da ranch" type dude. Mess with him til something better comes along.

Uh huh....das wassup.
Click to expand...

:lachen::lachen::lachen: Yep! Das Wassup!
 
imready4change said:
No more monogamous "dating" for me. It's too annoying.

Dating is like interviewing to me. You shouldn't stop looking for jobs because you found one you like. Make sure they feel the same through some sort of contract first. :yep:
Click to expand...

Preach...I did not used to date-I had one boyfriend at a time, but as I get older I think that limits my options way too much. I shouldn't be "off the market" when I don't have a ring, IMO. I feel I am perfectly free to do whatever I like until I find someone I want to be monogamous with and we agree through some type of formal commitment.

So now, I date as many guys as strike my fancy (anywhere from 0-4/5)...Whether or not I choose to engage in sex with any of these men depends completely on the individual relationship, but I would never be deceptive about that sort of thing as I would want the same courtesy.
 
always...when i am single..not single any more tho

people actually only date one man at a time--gasppppppppp

lol---missing out on soooooooooooooooooooooo much.....
 
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