mischka about town.
- Thread starter mischka
- Start date
*CherryPie*
Well-Known Member
Didn't mischka get banned?
PPGbubbles
Well-Known Member
..... soooooo welcome back?.....
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UrbainChic
Well-Known Member
Ladies! I can't lie, I expected a better homecoming than this!
Omg i am so happy! I've missed you! Seriously!!!!
meesch
yeezytotme
Yay! Huggies! I was definitely thinking about all the contacts I made and how I wouldn't be able to couch surf all around the country if I didn't find a way to talk to some of y'all again!
RoundEyedGirl504
Well-Known Member
I be damned the dead has arisen
Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
Etherealsmile
Well-Known Member
I am going to post an update to this thread tomorrow
I kept wondering what happened to you!! I didn't know you made the ____. So glad to have you back!
Bun Mistress
Well-Known Member
I missed this thread. I'm in.
Sent from my PC36100 using PC36100
Sent from my PC36100 using PC36100
TrueToHair
Well-Known Member
.....................
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meesch
yeezytotme
Ok, ok, ok. So, it's been quite a while since I wrote in this thread, and a lot has happened since then. I am going to post as best I can recall, and break the story[ies] up into chunks.
Ok, so when we left off Chris (is that his name?
) had asked me to be his “girlfriend” (eye roll) and I was kind of rolling with it. Soooooooo hmmmm where did that go? Ok, so it’s still summertime. My friend Emily wanted me to take her to a “black” club and do the whole save the last dance thing. Hilarious. I’d picked this girl’s clothes out and styled her and everything and when I was done, she didn’t look half bad despite the fact that she’s on the heavy side. I put her in a camisole whose cleavage dipped all the way down her chest and some skinny jeans rolled up to make room for the cute little Jessica Simpson sandals she’d bought. Then I piled all her heavy long hair on the top of her head in a ponytail that still trailed down her back. I wore a dress and my badgley mischka pumps and a third chick (her bff) tagged along too.
So we went to the club. As I have mentioned before, I never get any attention at clubs and the only guy who had hit on me all night had just gotten out of jail (ba-dum-bum). The best part of the night, frankly, was when we were leaving and the late night train was super crowded of summer time Saturday night partiers.
This is all relevant because when we got back to her place (where I was spending the night) I called Chris and wanted to hang out with him that night. But it was three or four in the morning and he was asleep (understandably). From that point on, it went downward and basically fizzled out and went nowhere. The thing that really bothered me was that I had left my phone charger over his house and when I asked him to find it for me he acted like he didn’t know what I was talking about, asking what it looked like (um it looks like a phone charger) and saying it wasn’t there when IT WAS and now I don’t have a charger for my phone. Lol idk why but that REALLY REALLY BUGGED ME and one day we were chatting online and he said something that irritated me and I was like, you know what, I don’t want to talk to you anymore and he took that literally and NEVER talked to me again.
Lol. Such a successful experience in having a “boyfriend”!
Ok, so when we left off Chris (is that his name?
) had asked me to be his “girlfriend” (eye roll) and I was kind of rolling with it. Soooooooo hmmmm where did that go? Ok, so it’s still summertime. My friend Emily wanted me to take her to a “black” club and do the whole save the last dance thing. Hilarious. I’d picked this girl’s clothes out and styled her and everything and when I was done, she didn’t look half bad despite the fact that she’s on the heavy side. I put her in a camisole whose cleavage dipped all the way down her chest and some skinny jeans rolled up to make room for the cute little Jessica Simpson sandals she’d bought. Then I piled all her heavy long hair on the top of her head in a ponytail that still trailed down her back. I wore a dress and my badgley mischka pumps and a third chick (her bff) tagged along too. So we went to the club. As I have mentioned before, I never get any attention at clubs and the only guy who had hit on me all night had just gotten out of jail (ba-dum-bum). The best part of the night, frankly, was when we were leaving and the late night train was super crowded of summer time Saturday night partiers.
This is all relevant because when we got back to her place (where I was spending the night) I called Chris and wanted to hang out with him that night. But it was three or four in the morning and he was asleep (understandably). From that point on, it went downward and basically fizzled out and went nowhere. The thing that really bothered me was that I had left my phone charger over his house and when I asked him to find it for me he acted like he didn’t know what I was talking about, asking what it looked like (um it looks like a phone charger) and saying it wasn’t there when IT WAS and now I don’t have a charger for my phone. Lol idk why but that REALLY REALLY BUGGED ME and one day we were chatting online and he said something that irritated me and I was like, you know what, I don’t want to talk to you anymore and he took that literally and NEVER talked to me again.
Lol. Such a successful experience in having a “boyfriend”!
allmundjoi
New Member
Ladies! I can't lie, I expected a better homecoming than this!
Girl, I ain't gonna lie. I was checking for you. Lol. So ya meesch now? Welcome back.
These dayum phone apps-can't thank, can't readily see notifications, can't see animated gifs, can't see siggies and often can't see avatars.
meesch
yeezytotme
SilverSurfer
Well-Known Member
Welcome back. Missed reading your posts.
meesch
yeezytotme
So, this is the one in which I discuss various failed ventures on okcupid. I went out with two guys that were sincerely NOT interested in me, and that was my first experience being rejected from the whole online dating process. Or, well, rejected outright, I suppose.
This first guy was a weirdo and I knew from the start the date was doomed so I didn’t even know why I even went. The second guy, I have no idea why he didn’t like me. I have to assume it’s because I wasn’t pretty enough or I was too fat. Even though he wasn’t skinny, and he turned out to have janky teeth. The point is – whatever. It was totally random and a learning experience (even though I went back and friended the second guy on FB and offered to be friends, then when he agreed with relative enthusiasm, I never replied again, lol).
Ok, here is why this is relevant. I would say that I am a person who USED TO be a lookist. That means I judged people harshly according to their looks and made value judgments about people depending on how they looked. It also means that one of the highest and most prevailing criterion for deciding which men to be involved with relied on their looks. It is the female equivalent of a man only dating the youngest, prettiest, trimmest, lush hair-est, bustiest women. Some people would tell you this is not good.
And it was fine, I guess. I did manage to snare some very good looking men, into sexual relationships at least, and so… I boned some exceptionally good looking guys. Yay? Hooray? I mean, what good does that really do me? What weight does that carry in my repertoire of experience and relationships? To be quite honest with you, the best looking guys I’ve been with are the ones who damaged my life the most, and after that happened the second time I had to take a good hard look at myself and examine why I thought it meant so much to have a good looking guy be interested in me… what that said about MYSELF… and I didn’t like the implications of it, so I decided I needed to stop putting so much weight on what a guy looked like.
Well, I have a problem with balance and what this ended up doing was resulting in me really not caring at all what a guy looked like. I was willing to give most guys a chance as long as he wasn’t butt ugly gross. All the little things I picked at about looks were gone. But slowly other things started to go too, in murkier, grayer, areas, and again I wondered if I had gone too far. Maybe I won’t nitpick anymore about your particular style of dress, but do I really need to let go of standards about weight? Maybe I’ll date guys who are a little shorter, but do I have to date EVERY guy whose too short? I began to worry that I wasn’t letting looks factor in enough, which is kind of stupid, but, I mean, it’s hard to say “I don’t care about how you look” without sliding into dating ugly guys. And you can be as high minded about looks as you like, it doesn’t mean that they guy you’re dating isn’t coming to all kinds of value judgments about you relating to looks – and not just your own, they can easily draw conclusions about you based on your willingness to overlook THEIR flaws.
So, ultimately, it’s a delicate balance. I will never stop trying to achieve my own ideal of optimal physical appearance, but I have to pick and choose my battles when it comes to the men I will date. So, I have come up with a harder set of rules regarding my flexibility on the issue.
I just can’t with the receding hairlines. You will not have back hair (Jesus fing Christ, you can’t honestly expect any woman to put up with that). You don’t have to have a Hollywood smile, but I’m not going to feel bad for rejecting you for your janky teeth. I am no longer willing to overlook a stomach that extends beyond the pectorals. If you are shorter than me, my interest is automatically minus 3 points, SORRY. And, as always, there are standards of hygiene and couth that simply must be observed (although thankfully this has never really come up as an issue THANK GOD). These are guys that I will more or less avoid dating. And no neck beards! Why would you do that, you dirty hipster?
However, I don’t care if you don’t dress like a GQ model (can’t promise I won’t eventually force a shopping makeover trip on you though). I’m not judging you by your shoes. I’m willing to work with a small(er) penis, ok, we can’t help what god gave us. I don’t mind stocky guys. And yes, I’d prefer you to be taller than me, but I’m willing to accept only an inch or two advantage where you’re not WAY taller than me. These are areas where I am flexible.
Issues of questionable facial features will be judged on a case by case basis.
This first guy was a weirdo and I knew from the start the date was doomed so I didn’t even know why I even went. The second guy, I have no idea why he didn’t like me. I have to assume it’s because I wasn’t pretty enough or I was too fat. Even though he wasn’t skinny, and he turned out to have janky teeth. The point is – whatever. It was totally random and a learning experience (even though I went back and friended the second guy on FB and offered to be friends, then when he agreed with relative enthusiasm, I never replied again, lol).
Ok, here is why this is relevant. I would say that I am a person who USED TO be a lookist. That means I judged people harshly according to their looks and made value judgments about people depending on how they looked. It also means that one of the highest and most prevailing criterion for deciding which men to be involved with relied on their looks. It is the female equivalent of a man only dating the youngest, prettiest, trimmest, lush hair-est, bustiest women. Some people would tell you this is not good.
And it was fine, I guess. I did manage to snare some very good looking men, into sexual relationships at least, and so… I boned some exceptionally good looking guys. Yay? Hooray? I mean, what good does that really do me? What weight does that carry in my repertoire of experience and relationships? To be quite honest with you, the best looking guys I’ve been with are the ones who damaged my life the most, and after that happened the second time I had to take a good hard look at myself and examine why I thought it meant so much to have a good looking guy be interested in me… what that said about MYSELF… and I didn’t like the implications of it, so I decided I needed to stop putting so much weight on what a guy looked like.
Well, I have a problem with balance and what this ended up doing was resulting in me really not caring at all what a guy looked like. I was willing to give most guys a chance as long as he wasn’t butt ugly gross. All the little things I picked at about looks were gone. But slowly other things started to go too, in murkier, grayer, areas, and again I wondered if I had gone too far. Maybe I won’t nitpick anymore about your particular style of dress, but do I really need to let go of standards about weight? Maybe I’ll date guys who are a little shorter, but do I have to date EVERY guy whose too short? I began to worry that I wasn’t letting looks factor in enough, which is kind of stupid, but, I mean, it’s hard to say “I don’t care about how you look” without sliding into dating ugly guys. And you can be as high minded about looks as you like, it doesn’t mean that they guy you’re dating isn’t coming to all kinds of value judgments about you relating to looks – and not just your own, they can easily draw conclusions about you based on your willingness to overlook THEIR flaws.
So, ultimately, it’s a delicate balance. I will never stop trying to achieve my own ideal of optimal physical appearance, but I have to pick and choose my battles when it comes to the men I will date. So, I have come up with a harder set of rules regarding my flexibility on the issue.
I just can’t with the receding hairlines. You will not have back hair (Jesus fing Christ, you can’t honestly expect any woman to put up with that). You don’t have to have a Hollywood smile, but I’m not going to feel bad for rejecting you for your janky teeth. I am no longer willing to overlook a stomach that extends beyond the pectorals. If you are shorter than me, my interest is automatically minus 3 points, SORRY. And, as always, there are standards of hygiene and couth that simply must be observed (although thankfully this has never really come up as an issue THANK GOD). These are guys that I will more or less avoid dating. And no neck beards! Why would you do that, you dirty hipster?
However, I don’t care if you don’t dress like a GQ model (can’t promise I won’t eventually force a shopping makeover trip on you though). I’m not judging you by your shoes. I’m willing to work with a small(er) penis, ok, we can’t help what god gave us. I don’t mind stocky guys. And yes, I’d prefer you to be taller than me, but I’m willing to accept only an inch or two advantage where you’re not WAY taller than me. These are areas where I am flexible.
Issues of questionable facial features will be judged on a case by case basis.
TrueBeliever
Well-Known Member
Where did you get the $6.50 from?
****, I wouldn't give them another 6.5 if I made the banned.
meesch
yeezytotme
In between all these specific dating for the purpose of dating dates, my social life has not been entirely stilted… I mean, it is more than it should be, but I’ve had numerous opportunities to go out. At some point, it was one of my closer friend’s birthdays, and he was having a gathering at your friendly neighborhood gay bar. I wasn’t too keen on this idea seeing as how obviously there would be no potential for me to pick up a guy at the end of the night, but I so wanted to go dancing and was looking forward to it.
I was the first one there and ended up spending like a half hour alone at the bar waiting. There was another girl in the bar, dressed like a dowdy librarian, waiting at a table alone but it didn’t occur to me to see if we were part of the same party. Eventually my friends started to show up and we moved to the back portion of the bar where more drinks flowed.
I looked pretty good – ok fairly good, maybe, I don’t know – and was vaguely hoping that maybe Tony might FINALLY pay some attention to me. In these cases where I am out with only school friends, he is often the only straight, available guy there, lol, so I don’t know… it’s always an option, though one that is NEVER explored. Several gay guys there had complimented me and my outfit, so I was optimistic. Lol. And also making a mental note to cultivate a gay BFF, who seem like prime sources for self esteem boosts.
It turned out, as I suspected, that most of the straight men who were there had come as part of a couple, so I really was going to have to make the best of it and just dance my --- off. Since there were no guys around that would be interested in buying me drinks, I also couldn’t get as drunk as I’d have liked either, lol. Eventually though, everyone was slowly getting wasted and the party become much funnier and more enjoyable. Tony, as it turned out, is kind of an ---hole when he’s drunk, asking one girl if she had herpes (and replying that he had “a little bit” of herpes) and telling another how he was going to go out with some girl and sleep with her and “feel nothing.” Also, white people dancing: NOTHING FUNNIER.
At some point, this one chick that I keep meeting OVER AND OVER and never know her name showed up and started buying everyone shots, and I started feeling unusually fond of everyone there, glad to have made these friends. Also, now I can’t hear “We Found Love” without wanting to go dancing. But the night was winding down, and it became clear that they were going to close the bar down (i.e., they’d stay until the bar closed) and I didn’t want to be the last one there, leaving, as I was, alone. So I decided to call up an ex of mine, this same ex that I keep missing contact with and have been trying to hook up with again for AGES.
Luckily, this night seemed to finally have hit the spot, and he agreed to come meet me out. He and I met at college when I was 19 (I have mentioned him in passing very early on in this thread; see if you can spot him) and we have been hooking up off and on ever since. So I got my coat and went outside to wait, making him talk to me on the phone while I did… I get sort of clingy when I am drinking, apparently, and if I keep you on the phone I know where you are and when you’re going to show up.
Shortly after, he came through and we stopped for food. As we get older, he drops more and more hints that maybe our relationship is not entirely nothing and might even be pursued in other avenues at some point. For my part, I’m not particularly interested in him in any other way, so it just is what it is as far as I’m concerned. Anyway, yes, we boned that night, and Jesus it was pretty good.
By the way, remember Jeremy? After a couple instances of mutual friends commenting on how he blocked me on facebook, he eventually friended me again.
I was the first one there and ended up spending like a half hour alone at the bar waiting. There was another girl in the bar, dressed like a dowdy librarian, waiting at a table alone but it didn’t occur to me to see if we were part of the same party. Eventually my friends started to show up and we moved to the back portion of the bar where more drinks flowed.
I looked pretty good – ok fairly good, maybe, I don’t know – and was vaguely hoping that maybe Tony might FINALLY pay some attention to me. In these cases where I am out with only school friends, he is often the only straight, available guy there, lol, so I don’t know… it’s always an option, though one that is NEVER explored. Several gay guys there had complimented me and my outfit, so I was optimistic. Lol. And also making a mental note to cultivate a gay BFF, who seem like prime sources for self esteem boosts.
It turned out, as I suspected, that most of the straight men who were there had come as part of a couple, so I really was going to have to make the best of it and just dance my --- off. Since there were no guys around that would be interested in buying me drinks, I also couldn’t get as drunk as I’d have liked either, lol. Eventually though, everyone was slowly getting wasted and the party become much funnier and more enjoyable. Tony, as it turned out, is kind of an ---hole when he’s drunk, asking one girl if she had herpes (and replying that he had “a little bit” of herpes) and telling another how he was going to go out with some girl and sleep with her and “feel nothing.” Also, white people dancing: NOTHING FUNNIER.
At some point, this one chick that I keep meeting OVER AND OVER and never know her name showed up and started buying everyone shots, and I started feeling unusually fond of everyone there, glad to have made these friends. Also, now I can’t hear “We Found Love” without wanting to go dancing. But the night was winding down, and it became clear that they were going to close the bar down (i.e., they’d stay until the bar closed) and I didn’t want to be the last one there, leaving, as I was, alone. So I decided to call up an ex of mine, this same ex that I keep missing contact with and have been trying to hook up with again for AGES.
Luckily, this night seemed to finally have hit the spot, and he agreed to come meet me out. He and I met at college when I was 19 (I have mentioned him in passing very early on in this thread; see if you can spot him) and we have been hooking up off and on ever since. So I got my coat and went outside to wait, making him talk to me on the phone while I did… I get sort of clingy when I am drinking, apparently, and if I keep you on the phone I know where you are and when you’re going to show up.
Shortly after, he came through and we stopped for food. As we get older, he drops more and more hints that maybe our relationship is not entirely nothing
and might even be pursued in other avenues at some point. For my part, I’m not particularly interested in him in any other way, so it just is what it is as far as I’m concerned. Anyway, yes, we boned that night, and Jesus it was pretty good.By the way, remember Jeremy? After a couple instances of mutual friends commenting on how he blocked me on facebook, he eventually friended me again.
Welcome back....and don't get banned again.
Daeuiel
Cosplay Champ
meesch
yeezytotme
So, Dean and I have been chatting online FOR EV ER. He first messaged me on okcupid and to be honest I wasn’t THAT interested initially. He was a nice guy, his message was nice, there were no red flags appearance wise, but it was all kind of lukewarm. But I responded back because I sensed there might be potential, and after a few exchanges, I was actively interested. So began our loooooong online courtship.
We chatted online for months, sending long drawn out messages. There was sometimes a delay in correspondence because his life seemed fairly busy (which might have only served to make him more attractive to me). I really liked that the pace felt very natural, and since I wasn’t at a place in life where I even felt like I could be dating, the slower speed was what I needed. I think that it ended up being really helpful that we talked so long online because in a way a lot of the jitters and uncertainty was ironed out.
After about three months or so, I decided to take down my okcupid page (unrelated), but I invited Dean to continue to email me through my personal address. I didn’t know if he would, the defeatist in me expected him not to, and I told myself if he went through all the bother, he must REALLY be interested. And he DID. We exchanged a couple more emails before moving on to instant messaging and then voice chat. I learned that the only reason we hadn’t gone out yet was he was still waiting for me to give the go ahead since I was the one who kept putting the brakes on it. There was a brief issue where he told me he was considering moving across the country, and I hesitated, and he basically told me it seemed like I was worried I might get in too deep with him, and I shouldn’t let that stop me from even taking a chance here. That sort of put things in perspective. I hadn’t really realized I was seeming like the gatekeeper, because when was I ever going to be ready? The things I needed in my life to change weren’t going to happen overnight, so that same day I decided that we could meet. He suggested that very weekend, lol, which was still too soon so I countered with the weekend after, and we made plans.
The Saturday we were supposed to go out ended up being the same day as my nephew’s first birthday party. I spent the day running around doing that, and hastily packed a bag after so that he could pick me up from my sister’s place in the city. We had planned to meet at 7… I didn’t leave the party til 6… it seemed like I was just destined to be late on these bad first date impressions.
The first thing I noticed as he approached was that he was actually slightly cuter in real life than he was in his photos. Something about his eyes, I think… he’s just one of those guys with a friendly demeanor that spills over into his appearance. The second thing I noticed was that he was slightly stockier than I’d expected him to be, but still shy of chubby. This didn’t bother me, because if I were a guy I’d probably qualify as “stocky” myself, and actually made me feel a little bit more comfortable about the arrant pounds I’m still trying to drop myself.
So, we went for sushi. On the ride over, I found out that his father actually worked at the school I’d just graduated from; when he found out I’d gone there (which apparently I hadn’t mentioned since I go back and forth on “bragging” about it sometimes I leave it out entirely) he told his dad, who joked about feeling sorry for me. Point one: so you’ve been discussing me with your parents. Hmmmm…
He took me to some sushi buffet type restaurant, since for those that don’t know, sushi can cost like a dollar a roll, and this place had a flat rate. They were super crowded when we got there, so we took a number and went to a nearby bar for a drink. I had a black lemonade, he had a gin and tonic, and the bar was really cool; teak instead of the standard dark colors, sort of sleek and hip looking, not yet crowded because it’s still early.
Back at the sushi joint, I am ashamed to have to tell you I’ve never had sushi before. My last apartment was literally surrounded by sushi joints, but I just never got around to trying it. So he basically had to order for us and I had to have a crash course in using the chopsticks (I refused to ask for a fork). We had the seaweed salad (yum) and like six different types of rolls that came with four each. I only liked a few of them, so he ended up eating most of it. You never think of sushi as particularly filling food, but I was so full I couldn’t have ate another bite. The foursome sitting right next to us was ridiculously pretentious, by the way, having an actual conversation that included musings about facebook. Who talks about facebook as a concept in real life?
Afterward, we decided to go back to the bar, which had suddenly become super crowded. I managed to find us a table near the front and he went off to get us more drinks. The conversation is going great, and the music is good, which is making me want to dance. He’s laughing a lot, I’m smiling and flirting, and if I pause to think about him being next to me, it’s kind of making me hot. This is a good sign – I knew from talking online so long that he was more in the vein of nice guys who get friend zoned, and popular culture would have you believe those guys are cold fish in terms of sexual/physical compatibility. This was not the case, and I was pleasantly surprised that he wasn’t fitting into some either-or of sweet but pansy sissy guy vs hot sexy guy who treats you like crap.
His knee is touching my knee and hey, we’ve both had like four drinks at this point. Eventually my leg is propped over on his and his face is not very far from mine, and I’m thinking, why are we not kissing? We should be kissing. Normally I would kiss him. But the fact that he’s not making the first move is throwing me off, so I say, “I want to kiss you.” Then I kissed him. Point two: he is a very, very good kisser. And I do NOT say that lightly.
We stay at the bar awhile longer, talking and laughing more and people watching, and when he tried to pull my kissing maneuver a little while later, I cut him off in mid sentence. Hehe. For some reason, we decide to leave, and having no fixed idea of where to go next, we end up at some other bar. They had city flags hanging outside and I hoped we’d stumbled upon a cop bar (fantasies of The Wire dancing in my mind) but it appeared to be some regular hole in the wall beer dive. They had some live band playing that I thought was ok, he didn’t like, and we had one more drink. When he leaned in and kissed me, standing in the middle of the crowded room, I didn’t resist though normally I’m not much for PDA.
We head back for his car and before he can open my door for me the next thing I know we’re leaning against the car making out and feeling each other up like we’re in high school again. By the way, my voice is totally gone now from yelling over the noise at the bar, and my giggles are super hoarse and ridiculous which only makes us laugh more. People are walking by, and I think about how silly we must look to them, but I don’t care. It’s a good time, and I’m enjoying it, a lot.
So he brings me back to my sister’s place, and we have another quick go-round in the car… then again after he walks me to the door. The next morning, he texted me saying he had a great time and thanking me for coming out, asking if I’d like to do something next weekend. Score. Bona-fide certified successful first date.
We chatted online for months, sending long drawn out messages. There was sometimes a delay in correspondence because his life seemed fairly busy (which might have only served to make him more attractive to me). I really liked that the pace felt very natural, and since I wasn’t at a place in life where I even felt like I could be dating, the slower speed was what I needed. I think that it ended up being really helpful that we talked so long online because in a way a lot of the jitters and uncertainty was ironed out.
After about three months or so, I decided to take down my okcupid page (unrelated), but I invited Dean to continue to email me through my personal address. I didn’t know if he would, the defeatist in me expected him not to, and I told myself if he went through all the bother, he must REALLY be interested. And he DID. We exchanged a couple more emails before moving on to instant messaging and then voice chat. I learned that the only reason we hadn’t gone out yet was he was still waiting for me to give the go ahead since I was the one who kept putting the brakes on it. There was a brief issue where he told me he was considering moving across the country, and I hesitated, and he basically told me it seemed like I was worried I might get in too deep with him, and I shouldn’t let that stop me from even taking a chance here. That sort of put things in perspective. I hadn’t really realized I was seeming like the gatekeeper, because when was I ever going to be ready? The things I needed in my life to change weren’t going to happen overnight, so that same day I decided that we could meet. He suggested that very weekend, lol, which was still too soon so I countered with the weekend after, and we made plans.
The Saturday we were supposed to go out ended up being the same day as my nephew’s first birthday party. I spent the day running around doing that, and hastily packed a bag after so that he could pick me up from my sister’s place in the city. We had planned to meet at 7… I didn’t leave the party til 6… it seemed like I was just destined to be late on these bad first date impressions.
The first thing I noticed as he approached was that he was actually slightly cuter in real life than he was in his photos. Something about his eyes, I think… he’s just one of those guys with a friendly demeanor that spills over into his appearance. The second thing I noticed was that he was slightly stockier than I’d expected him to be, but still shy of chubby. This didn’t bother me, because if I were a guy I’d probably qualify as “stocky” myself, and actually made me feel a little bit more comfortable about the arrant pounds I’m still trying to drop myself.
So, we went for sushi. On the ride over, I found out that his father actually worked at the school I’d just graduated from; when he found out I’d gone there (which apparently I hadn’t mentioned since I go back and forth on “bragging” about it sometimes I leave it out entirely) he told his dad, who joked about feeling sorry for me. Point one: so you’ve been discussing me with your parents. Hmmmm…
He took me to some sushi buffet type restaurant, since for those that don’t know, sushi can cost like a dollar a roll, and this place had a flat rate. They were super crowded when we got there, so we took a number and went to a nearby bar for a drink. I had a black lemonade, he had a gin and tonic, and the bar was really cool; teak instead of the standard dark colors, sort of sleek and hip looking, not yet crowded because it’s still early.
Back at the sushi joint, I am ashamed to have to tell you I’ve never had sushi before. My last apartment was literally surrounded by sushi joints, but I just never got around to trying it. So he basically had to order for us and I had to have a crash course in using the chopsticks (I refused to ask for a fork). We had the seaweed salad (yum) and like six different types of rolls that came with four each. I only liked a few of them, so he ended up eating most of it. You never think of sushi as particularly filling food, but I was so full I couldn’t have ate another bite. The foursome sitting right next to us was ridiculously pretentious, by the way, having an actual conversation that included musings about facebook. Who talks about facebook as a concept in real life?
Afterward, we decided to go back to the bar, which had suddenly become super crowded. I managed to find us a table near the front and he went off to get us more drinks. The conversation is going great, and the music is good, which is making me want to dance. He’s laughing a lot, I’m smiling and flirting, and if I pause to think about him being next to me, it’s kind of making me hot. This is a good sign – I knew from talking online so long that he was more in the vein of nice guys who get friend zoned, and popular culture would have you believe those guys are cold fish in terms of sexual/physical compatibility. This was not the case, and I was pleasantly surprised that he wasn’t fitting into some either-or of sweet but pansy sissy guy vs hot sexy guy who treats you like crap.
His knee is touching my knee and hey, we’ve both had like four drinks at this point. Eventually my leg is propped over on his and his face is not very far from mine, and I’m thinking, why are we not kissing? We should be kissing. Normally I would kiss him. But the fact that he’s not making the first move is throwing me off, so I say, “I want to kiss you.” Then I kissed him. Point two: he is a very, very good kisser. And I do NOT say that lightly.
We stay at the bar awhile longer, talking and laughing more and people watching, and when he tried to pull my kissing maneuver a little while later, I cut him off in mid sentence. Hehe. For some reason, we decide to leave, and having no fixed idea of where to go next, we end up at some other bar. They had city flags hanging outside and I hoped we’d stumbled upon a cop bar (fantasies of The Wire dancing in my mind) but it appeared to be some regular hole in the wall beer dive. They had some live band playing that I thought was ok, he didn’t like, and we had one more drink. When he leaned in and kissed me, standing in the middle of the crowded room, I didn’t resist though normally I’m not much for PDA.
We head back for his car and before he can open my door for me the next thing I know we’re leaning against the car making out and feeling each other up like we’re in high school again. By the way, my voice is totally gone now from yelling over the noise at the bar, and my giggles are super hoarse and ridiculous which only makes us laugh more. People are walking by, and I think about how silly we must look to them, but I don’t care. It’s a good time, and I’m enjoying it, a lot.
So he brings me back to my sister’s place, and we have another quick go-round in the car… then again after he walks me to the door. The next morning, he texted me saying he had a great time and thanking me for coming out, asking if I’d like to do something next weekend. Score. Bona-fide certified successful first date.
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