Men's Looseness is in the DNA!!!! It's Genetic!

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

I was reading "What Daddy Never Told His Little Girl" by Tony Gaskins... and he stated that, men are naturally polyamorous because they are the descendents of Biblical kings... and other men who were naturally polyamorous and allowed to have so many women... and it's natural.

He stated, "Woman was taken from the rib of man. A woman can only belong to one man. A man can belong to many women. Ok, so it would be natural to accept this behavior from men in a male society." (NOTE: This author does not condone this behavior, nor does he excuse it. This is his attempt to explain it...)

This brother is a Christian... and the book, albeit insightful and good, is full of some very sexist generalizations to me, a lot of it stemming from personal experiences and Christian values. (I am not KNOCKING Christian values either!)

I personally can understand this history and can see where this logic may stem from... but I refuse to believe this unless God made Adam, Eve, and Evangelina at once and you can convict my spirit with this.

Thoughts?

 

[drasgrl]

I posted a link to a story I read about biologically men are programmed to stray. I believe this. Yes people do have a choice and free will to only be with one person but I don't think that is "normal." Let me find it again. http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/23706832/

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

I posted a link to a story I read about biologically men are programmed to stray. I believe this. Yes people do have a choice and free will to only be with one person but I don't think that is "normal." Let me find it again. http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/23706832/

OKAY!!!!!

See, here's my problem with all this stuff I hear from men about how it's natural for them to cheat... but not for women.

1) We are both primal species then. Men are not from Mars, and women are not from Venus. If anything, I would speculate that a man would -biologically- want to lock down one woman simply to insure his seed were his and not another man if she were to be pregnant. After the seed is fulfilled, then I would see him looking to make more with that one woman or spreading it all around the world as necessary. Why? Because men were made to continue spreading their genes. Women don't necessarily think about spreading our eggs out and apart, but we will love nurture and protect our children if we have them.

2) Women were made to enjoy sex purely for function JUST as well-if Not MORE than men. Were we not equipped with that magical -special pearl- that serves no function but pleasure and has the richest nerve endings in all mankind? Men are so scared of our potency they have this horrible practice of circumsizing us just to eliminate our pleasure potential and keep US faithful. We are multi-"orgasmic", and even though it's skanky to many of us, truth is you can't "run a train"/"choo choo" on a man, but you can on a woman. What is really more intimidating? The truth is, most of us don't share the thoughts and ideas that such an act is acceptable... so we don't indulge (or openly divulge) those actions if we've dealt with them and the topic comes up.

3) A woman doesn't have any biological basis in the desire to reproduce really... she would, in my opinion, make more sense to be the more promiscuous sex... until she got knocked/caught up.


Am I making sense though?

It's just the explanations that men are the only ones with biological basis for promiscuity... that's what irks me.

 

[HoneyDew]

I also disagree that this only applies to men. In most cases, I think women tend to value having a family and stable partner sooner, more, whatever than a man. Not that men don't value it, but it seems that women desire it more and for different reasons.

But, I think a lot of this is environmental and social, as well. In some societies, it is normal for WOMEN to have multiple mates. In a safe sex world I would LOVE that idea actually.

As much as I know that multiple men could collectively fulfill all my needs, it would not work out in the long run. I am being sensible here.

I think many men are not being sensible in their choices to be loose. Not in this day and age.

But, still I think more men have the tendency than we do, but could that be because of the social stigma that can be placed on us? If there were no social stigmas would more woman be loose, or admit to it? I think so.

I think a lot of it is just brainwashing.

 

[drasgrl]

OKAY!!!!!

See, here's my problem with all this stuff I hear from men about how it's natural for them to cheat... but not for women.

1) We are both primal species then. Men are not from Mars, and women are not from Venus. If anything, I would speculate that a man would -biologically- want to lock down one woman simply to insure his seed were his and not another man if she were to be pregnant. After the seed is fulfilled, then I would see him looking to make more with that one woman or spreading it all around the world as necessary. Why? Because men were made to continue spreading their genes. Women don't necessarily think about spreading our eggs out and apart, but we will love nurture and protect our children if we have them.

2) Women were made to enjoy sex purely for function JUST as well-if Not MORE than men. Were we not equipped with that magical -special pearl- that serves no function but pleasure and has the richest nerve endings in all mankind? Men are so scared of our potency they have this horrible practice of circumsizing us just to eliminate our pleasure potential and keep US faithful. We are multi-"orgasmic", and even though it's skanky to many of us, truth is you can't "run a train"/"choo choo" on a man, but you can on a woman. What is really more intimidating? The truth is, most of us don't share the thoughts and ideas that such an act is acceptable... so we don't indulge (or openly divulge) those actions if we've dealt with them and the topic comes up.

3) A woman doesn't have any biological basis in the desire to reproduce really... she would, in my opinion, make more sense to be the more promiscuous sex... until she got knocked/caught up.


Am I making sense though?

It's just the explanations that men are the only ones with biological basis for promiscuity... that's what irks me.

Yes you make sense and we know it's not just the men that creep. I's not in the womans best interest to be as promiscuous as the men. After all she is the one who bears the brunt of rearing the children whether she likes it or not.

It's not as easy as men who can say that ain't mine and roll on. Women can't do that so easily unless she aborts. Even if she decides to give it up for adoption she still has to wait 9 months and have something inside her zapping her energy, making her sick and slowing her down.

 

[locabouthair]

I respectfully disagree. I know one guy who is strongly against cheating because when he was younger his mother would constantly come to him crying about his dad's cheating ways and since then he decided he would never cheat.

 

[Valerie]

I was reading "What Daddy Never Told His Little Girl" by Tony Gaskins... and he stated that, men are naturally polyamorous because they are the descendents of Biblical kings... and other men who were naturally polyamorous and allowed to have so many women... and it's natural.

He stated, "Woman was taken from the rib of man. A woman can only belong to one man. A man can belong to many women. Ok, so it would be natural to accept this behavior from men in a male society." (NOTE: This author does not condone this behavior, nor does he excuse it. This is his attempt to explain it...)

This brother is a Christian... and the book, albeit insightful and good, is full of some very sexist generalizations to me, a lot of it stemming from personal experiences and Christian values. (I am not KNOCKING Christian values either!)

I personally can understand this history and can see where this logic may stem from... but I refuse to believe this unless God made Adam, Eve, and Evangelina at once and you can convict my spirit with this.

Thoughts?

The problem with some to these men, because they may behave a certain way, they said all men behave a certain way, there are some men who will always be dogs, however if so God would have made Adam, Eve, Betty and Sarah. When women live them for better men, they get mad!

 

[MizAvalon]

I have always thought that men were biologically programmed to want to spread their seed as much as possible and that women are programmed to seek a mate that will help them raise their young.

Now whether or not the man acts on his instinct is an individual choice but that doesn't mean that the desire isn't there.

Aren't humans the only mammals that attempt monogamy?

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

I have always thought that men were biologically programmed to want to spread their seed as much as possible and that women are programmed to seek a mate that will help them raise their young.

Now whether or not the man acts on his instinct is an individual choice but that doesn't mean that the desire isn't there.

Aren't humans the only mammals that attempt monogamy?

I agree. But a woman doesn't desire, in my opinion a man who will stay with her babies unless she's knocked up or already a mother. She might desire a man for protection, up to and including the offspring, but she doesn't wake up with the sole purpose in life to procreate... or seek monogamy until she is 'caught up'.

The problem with some to these men, because they may behave a certain way, they said all men behave a certain way, there are some men who will always be dogs, however if so God would have made Adam, Eve, Betty and Sarah. When women live them for better men, they get mad!

I feel that anyone who thinks a certain way might assume all others like them or who fit the profile are that way as well. I definitely feel the men aren't naturally monogamous is true, but it doesn't mean women naturally are as well. I don't think we hit the monogamy bug naturally until we're knocked up and stuck with baby~.

I respectfully disagree. I know one guy who is strongly against cheating because when he was younger his mother would constantly come to him crying about his dad's cheating ways and since then he decided he would never cheat.

Oh, for sure. I know plenty of men who are not into cheating, even if they vocalize it or not. I think every man is a different case, and their motives for cheating vary from man to man. The general excuse is because they felt like it. I know not all men cheat, but at the same time, I know that there's a broad spectrum that do!

Yes you make sense and we know it's not just the men that creep. I's not in the womans best interest to be as promiscuous as the men. After all she is the one who bears the brunt of rearing the children whether she likes it or not.

It's not as easy as men who can say that ain't mine and roll on. Women can't do that so easily unless she aborts. Even if she decides to give it up for adoption she still has to wait 9 months and have something inside her zapping her energy, making her sick and slowing her down.

I don't think it is usually in a woman's best interest either, especially if she doesn't have her back up pregnancy prevention. I think once she's knocked up, then I can see how the monogamy thing might kick in... or if she's looking to be knocked up...she might look for a monogamous partner.

 

[lola-lola]

I respectfully disagree. I know one guy who is strongly against cheating because when he was younger his mother would constantly come to him crying about his dad's cheating ways and since then he decided he would never cheat.

There are always exceptions,The fact that he saw his mom crying constantly has cause him to be against cheating because has children we absorb everything,he doesn't want to cause the same amount of pain his mom felt to another woman. Because of the structure of our society today, polygamy,cheating is frown upon and is not socially accepted and some men remain loyal because they are discipline that way (character). However,they still have fantasy of being with other women and will always look when a pretty women walks by. It's all about self-discipline and self-controlled,Because biologically men are not programmed to be with one mate. It's an animal instinct,but has humans we've learned to evolved, disciple and controlled ourselves for the most part.

 

[jturner7156]

I was reading "What Daddy Never Told His Little Girl" by Tony Gaskins... and he stated that, men are naturally polyamorous because they are the descendents of Biblical kings... and other men who were naturally polyamorous and allowed to have so many women... and it's natural.

He stated, "Woman was taken from the rib of man. A woman can only belong to one man. A man can belong to many women. Ok, so it would be natural to accept this behavior from men in a male society." (NOTE: This author does not condone this behavior, nor does he excuse it. This is his attempt to explain it...)

This brother is a Christian... and the book, albeit insightful and good, is full of some very sexist generalizations to me, a lot of it stemming from personal experiences and Christian values. (I am not KNOCKING Christian values either!)

I personally can understand this history and can see where this logic may stem from... but I refuse to believe this unless God made Adam, Eve, and Evangelina at once and you can convict my spirit with this.

Thoughts?

Girl, you said enough right there! In his book, does he explain why one of God's ten commandments was "Thou shall not commit ADULTERY" and how many times does the bible say fornication is a sin of the whole body? Wow, just Wow!

 

[esoterica]

If men and women are meant to be together then I find it strange that our goals sometimes seem so different. It's like they want the opposite of everything we think is important. Generally speaking of course...

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

Girl, you said enough right there! In his book, does he explain why one of God's ten commandments was "Thou shall not commit ADULTERY" and how many times does the bible say fornication is a sin of the whole body? Wow, just Wow!

He does not.
But he knows that- now at this point in time- this behavior is not sometihng to accept or condone. He is stating it from his personal experiences and what is stated.

I have spoken to him, and he has another book coming out and it will be based on questions such as yours, that he will answer from his perspective as a reformed man and Christian brother. Would you mind if I forwarded along for you?

 

[HoneyDew]

Girl, you said enough right there! In his book, does he explain why one of God's ten commandments was "Thou shall not commit ADULTERY" and how many times does the bible say fornication is a sin of the whole body? Wow, just Wow!

I agree. If he believes his theory, he needs to come up with some convincing facts. Just take the Bible out of it.

 

[TeeKay21]

Aren't humans the only mammals that attempt monogamy?

There are plenty of animals that mate for life/are monogamus (sp?)


1. Ducks
2. Eagles
3. Foxes
4. Geese
5. Gibbons
6. Lynx
7. Marmosets
8. Mountain lions
9. Swans 10. Wolves

 

[Nola Darling]

I was reading "What Daddy Never Told His Little Girl" by Tony Gaskins... and he stated that, men are naturally polyamorous because they are the descendents of Biblical kings... and other men who were naturally polyamorous and allowed to have so many women... and it's natural.

He stated, "Woman was taken from the rib of man. A woman can only belong to one man. A man can belong to many women. Ok, so it would be natural to accept this behavior from men in a male society." (NOTE: This author does not condone this behavior, nor does he excuse it. This is his attempt to explain it...)

This brother is a Christian... and the book, albeit insightful and good, is full of some very sexist generalizations to me, a lot of it stemming from personal experiences and Christian values. (I am not KNOCKING Christian values either!)

I personally can understand this history and can see where this logic may stem from... but I refuse to believe this unless God made Adam, Eve, and Evangelina at once and you can convict my spirit with this.

Thoughts?

Oh, okay....

 

[Nola Darling]

There are plenty of animals that mate for life/are monogamus (sp?)


1. Ducks
2. Eagles
3. Foxes
4. Geese
5. Gibbons
6. Lynx
7. Marmosets
8. Mountain lions
9. Swans 10. Wolves

11. Penguins

 

[HoneyDew]

Well, even the "monogamous" animals step out on their partners. Check this out:

http://faculty.vassar.edu/suter/1websites/bejohns/mateselection/files/monogamy.htm

It seems to benefit a woman to have more than more partners according to that article.

Extra-Pair Copulation
The Male Perspective
Birds, one of the largest groups of animals that are often monogamous, sometimes demonstrate a behavior known as extra-pair copulation. For males, these extra-pair copulations have many costs: there is a great deal of time spent away from the alpha pairing in search of beta females. Also, the alpha female may mate and be fertilized by a beta male while the alpha male is away searching for a partner. It has been shown that males tend to guard their primary mates much more closely during her fertile period and spend time in search of other mates only after this period is over. Whether these extra-pair copulations prove worthwhile for the males involved depends entirely on whether or not a beta female's egg is fertilized. With the use of DNA fingerprinting to determine paternity, it has been demonstrated that extra-pair copulation is advantageous for males and that the beta female's eggs are in fact fertilized quite frequently.

The Female Perspective
What do females stand to gain from extra-pair copulation? Most females resist philandering males, however some seek out copulation from more than one male. The table below lists hypotheses on why females might seek out several partners.

 

[Valerie]

To be honest a lot a women can cheat also, how many women are not married to men and have children for another man and the man think the children are theirs. Okay, we hear what men do, but women also can do, they may be not so vocal about it. There have been many cases in the UK, men have found out that the children they have fathered, they are not their biological father, before DNA, it was done on the quiet. Our pastor warned us, men by go out and a lot of husbands find that someone is hooking up the wife, because he starts to talk to her, or the man who took on three jobs and his wife still cheated. My cousin's wife cheated on him, two of the four children were not his. We all have free will and we can decide if we want to behave like dogs or be humans. Men cheat because of boredom, they can and the opportunity arises and women cheat because someone talks to them and gains their confidence or as one women cheated, she worked as a prison officer and the prison used to give her great oral sex and this is not the exception to the rule and she left her husband for him.

 

[HoneyDew]

Here's more:

In the animal world, some species of animals, including birds such as swans, once believed monogamous, are now known to engage in extra-pair copulations. Although social monogamy occurs in about 90 percent of avian species and about 3 percent of mammalian species, investigators estimate that 90 percent of socially monogamous species exhibit individual promiscuity in the form of extra-pair copulations.

 

[HoneyDew]

I agree with you, Valarie, but I also think some people cheat because they are missing something in their current mates. Of course, I think that is where values and morals kick in. You can try to make things work at home, or fall to your weakness and get what you are missing from someone else.

I don't always think it is about sex either. There are so many people in this world and there is a good chance that someone can intrigue you and strike something in you that your mate does not. Again, that is where the values and morals kick in to make a person make the right decision.

I say life is too short to be unhappy. If you are miserable, you need to try to fix what you have a make it work or get out.

Now, I am not a religious person. But, I do respect that people marry and are tied together by their faith. In those cases, there is more at stake if they really and truly are strong in their faith. You can't just jump out of your marriage.

Anyway, I do think monogamy is hard at times. But, it s social norm for us. it is about being honest and making a commitment. If someone agrees to be committed to me, I expect that. But cheating? Why do it. Just go on off on your own and leave me alone if you cannot hold up your end of this.

I have cheated before and it was the worse thing i have ever done. I am actually happy that my marriage ended, because I was not happy and life was so wonderful after the fact. But, I hate that I was not honest to my husband. I should have been woman enough to tell him that I was not happy.

But the truth is - it took the affair for me to realize that things could be better.

It can be really complicated, but I do think we, as humans, are governed by more than primal animalistic urges.

 

[AnnDriena_]

As humans we are "programmed" to do a lot of things we don't do (As a Christian I also believe the bible when it says mans heart is evil above all else). But why don't we do the things we are "programmed" to do? Because unlike primates we have a conscience and choice. And I'm flabbergasted at all these "intelligent" theories mainly started by mean and bamboozling women into believing it.

Men cheat because they think they can get away with it and for years they have been but now that so many women are calling them on their crap and demanding better treatment they are scrambling trying to do anything to hold onto their status quo of promiscuity.

 

[Armyqt]

I think just as many women cheat as men do. Most women are just smart enough not to get caught.

 

[Nola Darling]

I think just as many women cheat as men do. Most women are just smart enough not to get caught.

OKAY!...*Z snaps*

 

[lola-lola]

Girl, you said enough right there! In his book, does he explain why one of God's ten commandments was "Thou shall not commit ADULTERY" and how many times does the bible say fornication is a sin of the whole body? Wow, just Wow!

King of solomon had many wives,Plenty of kings in the the bible time had many wives. Also,saying certain characteristics are based in ones DNA and genetic make-up does make it moral.It just is what it is.

Here's more:

In the animal world, some species of animals, including birds such as swans, once believed monogamous, are now known to engage in extra-pair copulations. Although social monogamy occurs in about 90 percent of avian species and about 3 percent of mammalian species, investigators estimate that 90 percent of socially monogamous species exhibit individual promiscuity in the form of extra-pair copulations.

As humans we are "programmed" to do a lot of things we don't do (As a Christian I also believe the bible when it says mans heart is evil above all else). But why don't we do the things we are "programmed" to do? Because unlike primates we have a conscience and choice. And I'm flabbergasted at all these "intelligent" theories mainly started by mean and bamboozling women into believing it.

Men cheat because they think they can get away with it and for years they have been but now that so many women are calling them on their crap and demanding better treatment they are scrambling trying to do anything to hold onto their status quo of promiscuity.

That's not necessarily true,These "intelligent" mean bamboozling authors and even some scientist are just trying to explain their perspectives and point of views. They are theories not facts and one does not have to believe it. Everything should be taken with a grain of salt.

I believe there is more to cheating than believing one can get away with it. However, I do agree that some men are just pigs period. But looking at the big picture, sometimes it goes a lot deeper than the status quo of promiscuity.

Disclaimer: I hope no one is offended by me stating my opinions. It's all with love

 

[locabouthair]

I think just as many women cheat as men do. Most women are just smart enough not to get caught.

I agree. I used to think it was just men that cheated but most of my close females friends have cheated as well. Even one who I though would never cheat, did.