Marry Him?

would you marry this guy?

  • yes

    Votes: 30 68.2%

  • no

    Votes: 14 31.8%
  • Total voters
    44
  • Poll closed .
angiet1985 said:
I'm 37, never married (he's 44 12 years divorced)
Click to expand...

Damn, you're old enough to know that what you're asking is not a question to be asked of strangers on a message board. Ask yourself, not anyone else.

SMH @ the fact this thread even exists.
 
Lboogie said:
Damn, you're old enough to know that what you're asking is not a question to be asked of strangers on a message board. Ask yourself, not anyone else.

SMH @ the fact this thread even exists.
Click to expand...
I applaud the OP for bringing it to the message board. It's important for people to not isolate themselves and to use their support systems to help them think through major decisions. Even though we're strangers, we provide a place where some people feel safe to share their personal life, thoughts, and dreams. I've experienced being in isolation and making a major decision in a bubble, when I later realized that if I would have gotten different perspectives, my decision would have (and should have) been different. Sometimes, for whatever reason, we may not feel comfortable sharing with people in our lives, and that's ok. Sharing with anyone is a good thing -- you can always take what you want and leave the rest.
 
Hi OP I think the reason why pple are saying they would run the other way is cause they are probably applying it to their situations and also their ages, 8 yrs is definately a long time especially for someone marriage minded, you have said you were not marriage minded from the beginning because of children so it was a we'll see how it goes kind of relationship I dont see anything wrong he did because you moved in with him without a prior discussion of marriage from the get go (you did not indicate you had) So perhaps he was pretty content with just co habiting I mean he was married before and some divorcees dont really want to marry again which could explain why he didnt bring it up himself

And also why do you feel you are settling all of a sudden? I mean he was good enough for 8 yrs?
 
hmm....
if i were in your shoes i'd marry him
obviously he was good enough for you to date for almost a decade, and for you to raise your son around, so therefore he should be good enough to marry.
also i would consider my age and the fact that the dating pool of eligible men has shrunk quite a bit. i would just do it.
 
We're good. Thanks for asking. I think I just wanted to bounce my thoughts and fears off someone else. I'd be a liar if I didn't admit that I was little put off by some comments, but I also respect the honesty that came out. (I'm sure none of it was personal, people just said what they thought based on the info they had.) Just like someone said, it's my decision and I've made it, I guess I wanted to get unbiased and honest feedback.

Plans are coming along. I think I got a little cold feet (I usually don't make spontaneous decisions, so I started to freak a little) The "in-laws-to be" came down to visit this past weekend (5 days of spirited fun, laughs, singing, hugs, and food). I feel like part of the family now (I'm Auntie Angie which is huge since I have no brothers or sisters. Though the little 'uns were a little slow to warm up at first, I got good hugs from them all by day three). His dad was especially sweet to me and his mom has always been a dear (heck she never forgets a holiday and gives me more money than even my mom does for my birthdays). Even ex-wifey was there for the main party ( Saturday night) with his son and her two additions, and she's sweet to me, so what ever concerns I had I am working through them. I think I'm a little nervous about getting married. Not so much him as I previously said, but getting married (that's supposed to be for life right?..Yeah a little nervous)

So love him, love his family, he loves me, and they love me, so we're good.
Now i gotta get off some of this weight for our big day:giggle:
sorry for the length.
 
angiet1985 said:
We're good. Thanks for asking. I think I just wanted to bounce my thoughts and fears off someone else. I'd be a liar if I didn't admit that I was little put off by some comments, but I also respect the honesty that came out. (I'm sure none of it was personal, people just said what they thought based on the info they had.) Just like someone said, it's my decision and I've made it, I guess I wanted to get unbiased and honest feedback.

Plans are coming along. I think I got a little cold feet (I usually don't make spontaneous decisions, so I started to freak a little) The "in-laws-to be" came down to visit this past weekend (5 days of spirited fun, laughs, singing, hugs, and food). I feel like part of the family now (I'm Auntie Angie which is huge since I have no brothers or sisters. Though the little 'uns were a little slow to warm up at first, I got good hugs from them all by day three). His dad was especially sweet to me and his mom has always been a dear (heck she never forgets a holiday and gives me more money than even my mom does for my birthdays). Even ex-wifey was there for the main party ( Saturday night) with his son and her two additions, and she's sweet to me, so what ever concerns I had I am working through them. I think I'm a little nervous about getting married. Not so much him as I previously said, but getting married (that's supposed to be for life right?..Yeah a little nervous)

So love him, love his family, he loves me, and they love me, so we're good.
Now i gotta get off some of this weight for our big day:giggle:
sorry for the length.
Click to expand...


Congratulations on your engagement!! I wish you the best!
 
angiet1985 said:
We're good. Thanks for asking. I think I just wanted to bounce my thoughts and fears off someone else. I'd be a liar if I didn't admit that I was little put off by some comments, but I also respect the honesty that came out. (I'm sure none of it was personal, people just said what they thought based on the info they had.) Just like someone said, it's my decision and I've made it, I guess I wanted to get unbiased and honest feedback.

Plans are coming along. I think I got a little cold feet (I usually don't make spontaneous decisions, so I started to freak a little) The "in-laws-to be" came down to visit this past weekend (5 days of spirited fun, laughs, singing, hugs, and food). I feel like part of the family now (I'm Auntie Angie which is huge since I have no brothers or sisters. Though the little 'uns were a little slow to warm up at first, I got good hugs from them all by day three). His dad was especially sweet to me and his mom has always been a dear (heck she never forgets a holiday and gives me more money than even my mom does for my birthdays). Even ex-wifey was there for the main party ( Saturday night) with his son and her two additions, and she's sweet to me, so what ever concerns I had I am working through them. I think I'm a little nervous about getting married. Not so much him as I previously said, but getting married (that's supposed to be for life right?..Yeah a little nervous)

So love him, love his family, he loves me, and they love me, so we're good.
Now i gotta get off some of this weight for our big day:giggle:
sorry for the length.
Click to expand...
Awwww congratulations, I'm happy that you're happy with your decision! :) Blessings!
 
Sometimes people don't realize what they have until it's gone.

I know someone who was in a similar situation and now everything is great!

Good luck!
 
:update:
:woohoo2:We did it (5/8/2010)! It was beautiful, we wrote our own vows (his made me cry), and he did a wonderful job planning the venue, menu, arrangements.... All I had to do was get my self together and I NEVER felt or looked more beautiful.

We're very happy and his family and long time friends said that we are well matched (unlike that other marriage).
Waiting for pics and will post when they arrive.
 
Last edited:
angiet1985 said:
:update:
:woohoo2:We did it (5/8/2010)! It was beautiful, we wrote our own vows (his made me cry), and he did a wonderful planning the venue, menu, arrangements.... All I had to do was get my self together and I NEVER felt or looked more beautiful.

We're very happy and his family and long time friends said that we are well matched (unlike that other marriage).
Waiting for pics and will post when they arrive.
Click to expand...

Congrats....:Rose::Rose::Rose:

Wishing you many years of wedded bliss !!!:grin:
 
CONGRATS OP! I read through this whole thread, and I truly get the impression that you made the right decision.
 
Aww it looks like it was a lovely ceremony. I love your blue shawl and your hair! Everyone in the 2nd to last pic looks so happy, congrats!
 
Awww I love your pictures. You are a beautiful bride, and I am so jealous of you hair :love5:. It looks absolutely wonderful :yep:. Congrats on the wedding!
 
Filmatic said:
You look really beautiful. One of your attendees looks like someone I know. If his name starts with J that's him.
Click to expand...

There were some Js in attendance. Are you in Los Angeles or Northren CA?

Thanks ladies. I felt beautiful and happy. We had a great time (all lovers no haters)
 
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