Interesting question. I was watching House the other day and Cuddy said to House, "You need me, you may even love me, but you don't care about me." It was a very interesting line that made me raise my eyebrows, but it kinda made sense in context. Essentially, what Cuddy meant by "love" was that he had all these romantic feelings toward her, wanted to be with her and felt like she was an important part of his life--but it was all about him. He wanted the good things that he got out of a relationship with her (including sex, but really, much more than that--her attention, support, etc), his feelings toward her were powerful, but he rarely took the time to do anything for her or to pay close attention to what she needed and wanted.
I don't subscribe to that definition of "love", but people can be wishy washy with its definition, so I think it depends on what is meant. The way it is commonly used, I do believe that "I love you" can be much more than lust and still be completely self-centered. It can mean that you're a big part of my life and I really, really, really want you to stay with me. But that doesn't necessarily mean that someone who says that and feels that way is any good at caring for the needs and wants of the other person.
