From my setback a year ago, I learned:
1. I started slacking with moisture. Never start slacking. It has been mentioned before in this thread, but it's worth saying again...like the comparison to weight loss, you have to maintain your hair like you would maintain your body. Don't get too comfortable (actually don't get comfortable at all) and start making stupid blunders.
2. I was using the wrong moisturizers. The right moisturizer MATTERS. This and conditioners I would say one needs to spend the most time researching, because a lot of ladies use these two types of products the most. You're gonna be applying this product every day, sometimes twice a day...make sure you get it right.
3. Wearing tight ponytails. Tension=breakage. Not hard to understand. moving on...
4. Sleeping with an uncovered head 70% of the time. Again, laziness.
5. and doing whatever I learned a few long-haired ladies do (certain products were useless to me *coughNTM silk touch leave-incough* and I should have never stopped daily co-washing!).
This can't be said enough: if it ain't broke, don't fix...some things are not for everybody.
6. I was using heavy cone products. I've found over the past several years being on hair boards that cones tend to be a love it or hate it type thing...and chances are, if you don't know whether your hair likes them or not, I'd bet it probably doesn't. Don't underestimate what one or two extra ingredients in a "great product" can do to your hair.
7. I was using low quality products. My hair needs HIGH quality products, and in larger amounts. Some people can't do the cheapie thing. If your hair is not responding to the Suaves, V05s, White Rains, leave the $0.99 bottles alone.
8. I stopped relaxing with No-Lye, LYE ONLY now. Those mineral deposits are very, VERY drying. At one point, I wasn't even convinced chelating shampoo was doing much to help.
9. Wet buns are NOT for me. Not at all. My hair is too weak when it’s more than 30% wet, especially for long periods of time. This is also the reason why I don’t baggy, too much moisture. My strands just expand and expand and then *Pop*. Instead, I do a low, very loose braid while my hair is drying, and when it is dry or mostly dry, I will then bun.
SOME LADIES CANNOT handle wet-bunning! It may very well be few of us, seeing as so many ladies on LHCF love it, but a few of us can't do it. If you find your hair is thinning, especially in the area where your pony holder and clip goes, you probably need to stop the wet bunning.
10. NO PINS are good for my hair, not even the Good Day kind.
PINS are NOT for everyone.
11. DIRECT HEAT IS MY ENEMY. It has been said before in this thread, don't underestimate what a plate heated to several hundred degrees fahrenheit can do to your hair. It will burn/boil/fry/cook/bake/grill/bbq most hair to nothingness eventually.
12. I wasn’t sealing. *crazy, I know* Please take sealing VERY seriously ladies, it’s stupid not to. Anything you apply will evaporate like you never even put it on your head, making your efforts completely worthless.
13. Some ladies NEED heavy products. I have that dry, crispy, crackly 4b hair. Lol. I NEED thick moisturizers. I NEED thick sealants. I NEED lots of leave-in, coated with MORE leave-in. THEN, and only then, my hairs are satisfied. lol. None of this “dime-sized amount” stuff, I need 2 full palms of product. Some of y'all know what I'm talking about. lol.
14. I started to DC more since I upped the co-washing. Always remember to maintain the moisture-protein balance, keep a close eye on it, it's THE MOST crucial thing to watch!
15. This is a list I formerly wrote for my fotki, so this 15th tip is added just for you who post and seek information here.
I like hair typing. I'm not ashamed to hair type. and I don't see it as discrimination, or "hair-ism" (for lack of a better word, since some have likened it to colorism
), or being hung up on differences.
It's narrowing down the search of what works and what doesn't by observing those who are working with something similar to what you've got. These recent discussions on the "issue" have me puzzled.
Question: If hair type
really didn't matter, would we even need a black hair board?
Hair is hair, right? Why not just go to a predominantly white hair board and only ask their advice?
Because their hair is not like mine. It's all dead protein, yes, but when you've got such a
vast array of curls, texures, densities to search through... It's impractical and frankly stupid to think someone should start from scratch and formulate a regimen from every random head, haphazardly testing everything, trial and error, from doing type 3 things to type 4 hair...just doesn't make sense. Every now and then the same things will work, but let's be honest here...we have distinct differences that need to be treat differently.
No, not all type 4whatevers are the same, but they are sure much more similar in many ways. Typing a lot times cuts down on unneeded heartache. Categorizing makes sense.
So, my advice to the newbies, those having hair problems, and those who've suffered setbacks...don't be afraid to seek advice from those with your hair type. Take all advice with a grain of salt, but don't be discouraged if you're a 3c natural, to contact a 3c natural and ask that 3c natural, or several of them, what they do and why. Same for fine haired ladies, or silky-haired ladies.